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THE TEXAS TATTLER

All the news that’s barely fit to print!

“Wrong” Baby Rescued

Will the Real Father Please Stand Up?

A sigh of relief turned into hysteria earlier this week when a child recovered by the FBI and thought to be the abducted Bryan Fortune was actually an unidentified boy of roughly the same age. Blood tests and the distinctive crown-shaped birthmark confirm that the child is, however, a Fortune. Scandalous! Kidnappers remain at large.

The mystery child, “Taylor,” is being cared for at the jaw-drop-ping 500,000-acre Fortune “Western paradise,” but no word yet on the identity of the child’s father. Looks like one Fortune boy’s past just caught up to him—and is wearing a diaper.

Now, is this any time for company at the Double Crown Ranch? Insider sources verify that unwed Savannah Clark, college chum to Vanessa Fortune, arrived on the mansion doorstep yesterday hefting luggage and carrying a secret…in her belly. Better make that room for two more! Is there another undisclosed daddy in the house?