Читать книгу The Girl Who Walked in the Shadows - Marnie Riches - Страница 18

‘Phone, door keys, bag,’ Gabriella Deenen said, staring blankly at her possessions on the passenger seat. ‘Car keys. Where’s the—?’

The police officer leaned in through the driver’s open window. His hat and the bulk of his navy and yellow Politie jacket filling the space. ‘Are you sure you want to drive yourself?’ He sounded incredulous. His furrowed brow said he didn’t believe her. ‘You can come in the squad car and get someone to pick your vehicle up later.’

Gabi started the engine. The key had been in the ignition all the time! Which made sense, since she was sitting in the damned car and had to have had the key to unlock it in the first place. Pay attention, for god’s sake. Breathe in. Breathe out.

‘I’m fine. I’ll meet you at the house.’

She was surprised by how strong her voice sounded. She didn’t feel fine. She felt like she was going to be sick. Pull yourself together, you weak woman, she counselled herself. You’ll get home. This will all be a big mistake. With a click of a switch, the window closed, shutting the irritating, well-meaning and concern of the policeman outside.

Pulling out of the parking space, she almost crashed into the police car. Almost. Not quite. She was fine. This was okay. It was going to be a mistake. Except she had that horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach. Not butterflies. More like flapping, desperate moths, blind to the direction in which the light lay.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

When they had turned up, in the middle of her fundraising presentation, at first she had been annoyed. Knock, knock on the door of the meeting room, right as she was delivering a heart-rending speech about the hope that the charity’s medical research brought to families affected by traumatic brain injury. The donor – a director in a multi-national mining company with a shocking health and safety record – had been rapt with attention; chequebook open, hoping to buy the company a better public image. But just as things were going well and she had enjoyed that rush she used to get back in London, when she had pulled off a particularly good PR campaign, propelling Schoen Engineering Systems to the top of the aerospace heap, they had barged their way in. Flashing ID.

Yes. She had had a bad feeling. The moment she had seen them in the doorway. Eyes only for her.

‘Can you come with us, please, Mrs Deenen?’

The policewoman’s face had been arranged into an expression of kindliness and sympathy. She wondered if the Dutch Police HR department had arranged training for that kind of thing. Body language was so important.

Now, her hands shook, though she was gripping the steering wheel as tightly as possible. Skin stretched tight over white bony knuckles.. As she waited at the traffic lights, fragmented thoughts punctured her apparent composure. Josh and Lucy missing. A slight chip on her bronze nail varnish. Trip to the nail bar was in order. But Josh and Lucy were missing. Missing.

The traffic lights turned to red. Slamming hard on the brakes, the police car almost ran into the back of her. Suddenly, her foot was disobeying her brain. Trembling. Jerking. Kangaroo petrol, she lurched away on green.

‘What do they mean, missing?’ she asked the road sign as she pulled into their street.

There were two police cars outside their hydrangea-fronted house. The lawn needed a trim, she noted. Her Dutch home in this Amsterdam satellite town – quiet but for the Schiphol to Rotterdam line that ran at the back of the long garden – was hardly in the same league as the Victorian house they had had in London. But at least it was detached. She didn’t feel ashamed to have the police officers in and offer them a cold drink. Perhaps Piet would already have made them one. The kids were almost certainly playing in the back garden in this weather.

The kids.

The kids weren’t playing in the garden. The police were here. Josh and Lucy were missing.

Almost ploughing into the back of a small white van that overhung the paved driveway by a small margin, Gabi parked up abruptly, only an inch or so between the bumper and the brick wall. Light-headed, she patted her hair. Phone. Bag. Keys. Going through the routine. Imposing some normality on the abnormal. Staring at everything but seeing nothing. Fingers fumbling with the fob. Locking the car. Turning her ankle as she walked in through the open front door. Unaware of the pain. Past the constable on the step, talking into his hissing walkie-talkie. He reached out to try to stop her but she strutted on into the kitchen.

Look for Lucy and Josh. They’ll be there. Sitting at the table, drawing. Bet Piet hasn’t washed their hands all morning. If they’re not there, they’re in the garden. Yes, they’ll be outside.

At her back, the police officers who had come to the office were saying something to her, though she wasn’t listening. She heard her name. ‘Mrs Deenen.’ But the rest was rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb.

‘Rhubarb,’ she said under her breath, remembering stage instructions for extras in the school play when she had been a child, though she had always taken the leading role. ‘Rhubarb.’ Josh’s favourite kind of crumble pudding, though Lucy often gagged on the stringy consistency.

Steeling herself to connect with here and now, Gabi took in her surroundings. So many police officers were encroaching on her space. There was a man in plain clothes, talking to Piet, taking notes at the island in the middle of the kitchen. He had a glass of water by his right hand. Good. Piet had offered them all refreshments.

Beyond, she saw the empty lawn. The enormity of the situation started to dawn on her.

Piet was crying, staring at her, with tears coursing down his cheeks. Red-eyed. Red-nosed. Snot on his upper lip and the white fluffy remnants of kitchen roll stuck in his stubble.

He held his arms out as he stood and stumbled towards her. ‘I’m so sorry, darling.’

Gabi put her bag carefully on the work surface. Pushed Piet back towards his stool, walked to the sink and washed her hands carefully, running the water until it was boiling hot. Rubbing and rubbing the astringent lemony hand-wash between her fingers. She dried her hands methodically on a clean towel. The garden appeared empty of children. Nobody on the slide. No Josh, jumping up and down on the sun-lounger, trying to launch himself onto his sister or clutching his ears as the train roared past.

The policeman who wore his own clothes was speaking to her – a detective. Yes. He must be a detective. She stared at him blankly. Little Gabi, blinded by the glare. Silenced by the attention. All eyes on her. Struggling to remember her opening lines. Rhubarb. Rhubarb. ‘You’re in shock, Mrs Deenen. Shall I make you a cup of coffee?’ a policewoman said. Who was she? Oh, that’s right. One of the constables who had shown up at the office.

‘Where are Lucy and Josh, Pieter?’ Gabi asked her husband. No longer was she a child. Big Gabi needed to take control of this shambles. Big Gabi would sort it. ‘What have you done with our children, you fucking useless bastard?’

She marched up to Piet and thumped him squarely on the side of the head, with such force, that he fell off his stool onto the kitchen floor. ‘All you had to do was babysit them for half a day, while I went in to give that presentation.’ Big Gabi was screaming. ‘And you couldn’t even do that. You miserable, useless fucking wimp.’

‘Mrs Deenen! Please to try stay calm.’ The detective grabbed her by the forearms. He was tall. Authoritative.

This badge-toting turd wasn’t the boss of her. She shook him off.

She ran into the garden, screaming at the top of her lungs. ‘Josh! Lucy! Mummy’s here. You can come out now!’

‘Can you think of anyone who might have taken them, Mrs Deenen? A relative? A friend? Neighbour?’ the detective asked. He had followed her outside. Now, he was standing between her and the climbing frame.

Interfering pain in the arse, she thought. She could find her own children. They were obviously just playing hide and seek.

‘Move! I want to check under there,’ she said, pointing to the void beneath the platform.

‘We’ve had a team combing the garden and all along the train track at the back for the last hour. There’s no way in. There’s no way out. The train track is clear for a mile in each direction, though they’ve stopped the Schiphol to Rotterdam service until we’ve searched the entire line. No trace of them.’

When she tried to push him aside, he stood his ground.

‘Mrs Deenen. Your children aren’t hiding, I’m afraid. They’re gone. They can’t have wandered off. They’re not in the house or the garden. They’ve been taken. Abducted.’

Gabi looked at the Sesamstraat tricycle and an abandoned Iggle Piggle doll Lucy had brought from the UK. She sank to her knees, arms crossed tightly over her bosom. Big Gabi, wrapping Little Gabi in a protective embrace. Keening. Cursing god that her babies were gone. That her life had been thrown into chaos.

‘This can’t be happening. This can’t.’

The detective put a large hand on her shoulder. ‘I’m so sorry.’