Читать книгу Sultry - Mary Baxter Lynn - Страница 10

“Ouch!”

Lindsay figured Cooper and Dolly had heard her muttered groan of pain. She’d been in the small office in her bedroom suite all morning, going over her upcoming charity commitments. But every time she moved, she winced with pain, either silently or out loud.

Her shins were a mess. In fact, she had shin splints worse than she’d ever had them. She had no one to blame but herself for this predicament. Following her less than satisfying encounter with Mitch Rawlins, she had started to jog, thinking it would work off some of her frustration.

The problem was, she got carried away and took her stress management too far. She ended up jogging six miles instead of the three she normally did. Now, two days later, she was still paying for her over-industrious whim. Still, it had made her feel better, even though thoughts of Mitch Rawlins had run alongside her.

What was it going to take to strike him from her mind? Right off, she couldn’t think of anything. Disgusted, Lindsay turned back to the computer screen, to the words she’d typed. If she wanted to remove them, all she had to do was hit the delete key.

Voilà! Gone. Poof. Like magic. Too bad she couldn’t do the same with her erotic thoughts of Mitch Rawlins.

If only Peter attracted her in that way, then maybe there would be hope for them. But there was nothing about him that turned her on. The few times he’d kissed her, she’d felt nothing.

It wasn’t that she hadn’t tried. She had—admittedly more for her father than for herself, which in itself was wrong. Nonetheless, a future with Peter, for whatever reason, was not in the cards. But that didn’t mean she didn’t want a man in her life, though the thought of deeply caring about someone else and the responsibility that carried sent her into a panic.

She also panicked when she asked herself a hard question. After the real-life nightmares she’d lived through, could she ever sustain a lasting relationship with a man? What if… No! She wouldn’t sabotage herself like that—not when she’d been doing so well lately, especially now that she had a project in the making that she felt passionate about.

Speaking of passion… Her tummy suddenly flip-flopped as once again her mind betrayed her. She wondered if Mitch was married. She hadn’t seen a ring, but that didn’t mean anything. With luck, he would be attached, which would put the brakes on her thoughts as nothing else could.

On the other hand, if he wasn’t attached, then… Stop it! she told herself. So he had a great body? So what? She’d dated others who looked as good. Well, maybe not, but nearly. The one guy she’d been crazy about in college, had even gone to bed with, had had all the right stuff. Or so she’d thought. Obviously there had been something missing, because their relationship hadn’t endured.

Maybe it was Mitch’s eyes, she mused. They were such an unusual shade of blue, which made them seem mysterious. When he’d stared at her that last time, she had wished she could dive into those eyes and learn all his secrets.

Lindsay shivered, wondering if he thought the same thing about her. Talk about secrets—her heart was crowded with them.

Suddenly tired of this craziness, Lindsay lurched up, only to groan again, having forgotten how sore her body was. Damn, but she was more out of shape than she’d imagined. Maybe she should be the one putting in some quality time on the other end of that shovel. She would bet Mitch could run forever and not know it. He looked in perfect physical condition.

She shook her head, clearing him from her mind. He was the groundskeeper, for heaven’s sake. Even if she wanted to have sex with a man, it wouldn’t be with him.

She peered at her watch and decided now would be as good a time as any to talk to Cooper—something she’d intended to do two days ago. And though she dreaded it, postponing it wasn’t going to make it any easier.

Five minutes later, she knocked on his door. No answer. Frowning, she turned and made her way very gingerly down the stairs. She hoped he wasn’t on the golf course, for more reasons than one.

Dolly was polishing the bottom part of the banister. When she saw Lindsay, she stopped and shook her head in disapproval.

“Don’t say a word,” Lindsay warned.

Dolly rolled her black eyes high and around. “You younguns don’t have any sense. None of y’all. Just beat up on your body when there’s no call for it.”

“I know, Dolly. I’m guilty as charged.”

“You need to see a doctor.”

Lindsay tried to smile. “What I need is to stop hurting, and no doctor can remedy that.”

Dolly merely shook her head, all the while muttering to herself.

“Do you know if Daddy’s here?”

“He’s on the porch, finishing his lunch.”

“Thanks.”

Moments later, Lindsay eased onto one of the colorful plush settees that faced Cooper.

“Well, I see you’re still crippled,” he said, eyeing her up and down.

“Don’t you start. Dolly’s already put in her two cents’ worth.”

“And well she should,” Cooper responded briskly.

Lindsay took a deep breath, trying to catalog her thoughts. “Do you have a minute to spare? I’d like to talk to you.” Before Cooper could say anything, she went on. “And it’s not about Peter, either.”

“That’s all right,” Cooper said in a condescending manner. “We’ll save him for another time.”

Red hot anger surged through Lindsay. She wasn’t fooled. She knew what was going on inside his head. Cooper saw her rebellion as a whim. He thought if he was simply indulgent and patted her on the head, she would come around to his way of thinking.

“Go on,” he said into the silence, putting down the newspaper. “I’m listening.”

Lindsay unclenched her fingers. “I had been thinking about this before your accident, only I hadn’t acted on it. Now I want to.”

“What are you talking about, Lindsay?”

His impatience was obvious, but she overlooked it and went on. “You know how much I’ve enjoyed the benefits I’ve reaped from working with the women’s shelter.”

“Yes, though I can’t for the life of me see why. It would certainly not be my choice for you.”

This was going to be harder than she’d figured. His mind was already closed. But she wasn’t about to turn back now. Besides, she didn’t really need his approval; she just wanted it.

“Anyhow, there are some women at the shelter with children who could and would do better if they had any kind of help at all.”

“You mean other than what the shelter provides?”

Although Cooper’s tone sounded almost terse, at least he was listening. “That’s exactly what I mean. As you know, the shelter’s only temporary—a stopgap measure, if you will.”

“So I can assume you’re about to suggest something more permanent, right?”

Dismissing his patronizing and less-than-serious attitude, she forged on. “As a matter of fact, I am. I’m envisioning a place where those special families can live, go to school and access child care—all at no cost to them.”

Cooper laughed, though without humor. “Surely you aren’t serious?”

“I’m as serious as I’ve ever been about anything.”

“Place? What kind of place, for God’s sake?”

“A campus of sorts. Different buildings for different needs. Apartment-style complexes, a free-standing day-care center—” Lindsay broke off, her eyebrows coming together in a frown. “At this point, I’m not really sure. It’s still sketchy in my mind.”

“In my mind, it’s preposterous,” Cooper sputtered, color surging into his face.

Lindsay knew he was getting angry, but she didn’t care—as long as that anger didn’t harm him. She’d gone this far, and she wasn’t pulling back now, even though it would have been easier just to give in.

“The primary aim of this venture or program or whatever you want to call it would be to get these young parents out of the welfare system and help them become contributing members of society.”

“While that all sounds good, I don’t see it working.”

“Why not?” Lindsay demanded.

“Because it’s never worked before.”

“No one’s ever tried what I’m proposing before.”

“My point. That’s because it won’t work.”

Lindsay’s eyes sparked. “I disagree. I think it will work and work well.”

“So call our congressman and tell him,” Cooper said in an offhand manner. “Let him pursue it.”

“I don’t want to call our congressman,” Lindsay said, her voice tight but even. “I want to spearhead it myself.”

Cooper lunged to his feet. “That’s the craziest notion I’ve ever heard.”

“It may be crazy, but it’s not impossible.”

“Just say I thought it was a good idea—which I don’t—” Cooper added quickly “how the hell do you propose to pull it off?”

“With lots of money and lots of time.”

“Your money and your time, right?”

Lindsay didn’t so much as blink under the harsh glare of his criticism and censure. “That and grants. There’s all kinds of money out there. You just have to know where to find it, then how to get it.”

“And I suppose you do?”

She ignored the mocking edge in his voice and said, “Of course not. I don’t have all the answers yet, but it’s something I really want to try. Something that will give my life direction.”

“That’s baloney. Your life has direction. When you and Peter marry—”

“Don’t, Daddy. Peter’s off-limits.”

“As far as I’m concerned, this poppycock idea is what’s off-limits.”

“I thought you might even be willing to donate some of the money,” Lindsay said in a dull tone.

“Like hell!” Cooper raged. “I don’t want you that involved with those kinds of people, you hear?”

Lindsay blanched, mortified at his choice of words. “‘Those kinds of people’?”

“Yes,” he hammered on. “You’re a Newman. You’re meant for bigger and better things.”

“Like what?” she asked fiercely, fighting off her disappointment and forcing back the tears. She’d had such high hopes that for once he would see things her way, support her in just one thing she wanted to do. She should have known better, she told herself, bitterness coursing through her like poison.

“Like marrying Peter and making a home for him,” Cooper said into the reigning silence, his tone grim.

Lindsay’s chin jutted. She was determined not to waver from her game plan. She refused to be lured into another blazing gunfight about Peter. Besides, when Cooper got on his high horse, like now, there was no reasoning with him.

“And acting as my hostess,” he went on. “Something that is damn important to me. Which reminds me, now that I’m feeling like my old self again, I want to have a dinner party. Not a large one, but a party, nonetheless.” His eyebrows shot up. “Need I say more?”

No, but she was about to. “Why haven’t you remarried, Daddy?”

Lindsay knew she’d shocked him again, but that was okay. That question was one she had wanted to ask for a long time but hadn’t had the courage to. Now it just slipped out, and somehow it seemed to fit the natural order of things. Cooper loved to entertain, and he loved women. In her mind, the two were closely linked.

“I intend never to remarry,” he said coldly.

“Do you think that’s what Mother would’ve wanted?” Lindsay asked, fishing for something that even she couldn’t identify. She blamed Tim. He had scraped the scab on an old wound that had never healed. Now it was festering again.

Cooper’s features turned more frigid than his voice. “I’d rather leave your mother out of this conversation, if you don’t mind.”

“But I do mind,” she said, her eyes wide and questioning. “You never want to talk about Mother, what happened to her—or to me, for that matter.”

“You’re right, I don’t. End of discussion.” He got up and strode back into the house.

Lindsay withdrew her gaze from his rigid back and stared into the distance. But nothing was visible. Her eyes were too full of tears.