Читать книгу Brides & Bargains - Maureen Child - Страница 13
ОглавлениеNasira placed a hand over her mouth to stifle a gasp. Myriad questions whirled through her mind like a crazed carousel. “Why? How?”
Sebastian disappeared into the kitchen and returned with a tumbler half full of his favorite scotch. “Why? Because he’s a selfish bastard who only cares about his desires. How involves... “
When he hesitated, Nasira’s anxiety escalated. “Go on.”
Sebastian streaked a hand over his shadowed jaw. “He knew she was ill and didn’t lift a finger to help her.”
She sat back, her shoulders sagging from mild relief. “I truly thought you were going to mention knives or guns or perhaps poison.”
He settled back into the chair and took a sip of the drink. “He might as well have put a gun to her head by not seeking medical attention when she clearly needed it. I knew something was wrong that morning.”
Nasira realized he was perched on the precipice of deep emotional pain. “The morning she passed away?”
He shook his head. “No. The last morning I saw her alive.” He stared at some unknown focal point, as if he had mentally returned to that day, before he spoke again. “I had been on summer break from boarding school and it was time for me to return. Of course, I happened to be running late when Mother summoned me into her quarters. She was propped up in bed and she looked very pale. She told me she loved me and hugged me as if she didn’t want to let me go. As if she knew it would be the final time. And I wrenched out of her grasp because I knew if I didn’t leave at that moment, I would earn my father’s wrath for making the driver wait. I never expressed my love for her, and I have lived with that regret for almost three decades.”
Her heart ached for him. “You were only a child, Sebastian. You could not have foreseen the future.”
He released a weary sigh. “Perhaps, and I would not have predicted what I would learn when I was called into the headmaster’s office two days later. My father did not bother to personally retrieve me. He sent one of the bloody staff members to tell me my mother was dead. He did not shed one tear at the wake. Worse still, he admonished me for crying.”
Nasira had always been fond of her father-in-law, who seemed nothing at all like the tyrant Sebastian had described. “I am stunned at his behavior. James has always treated me with kindness and affection.”
Sebastian leveled his gaze on her. “You’ve never disappointed him, and I have never lived up to his standards.”
“You are a brilliant businessman. I cannot imagine he would hand over the company to you if he did not truly believe that.”
“He did so because he had no choice since I failed to produce an heir. I refuse to relinquish that control to him.”
Had this been the reason behind his reluctance to have another child? A vendetta against an unfeeling patriarch?
She would not know the reason behind his resistance unless she asked, yet she sensed this might not be the time or place to do so. She did have another important question. “I understand James treated you poorly, but do you truly believe he neglected your mother’s health issues? I’ve heard the staff speaking highly of their relationship.”
Sebastian tightened his grip on the glass in his hand. “I heard the servants discussing a few details when they didn’t realize I was eavesdropping. As we both know, they are the eyes and ears of the household.”
“And did you confront your father over this idle chitchat?”
He pushed the scotch aside as if it held no appeal. “At ten years old, I didn’t dare try. Since that time, he has never been one to discuss personal affairs. Had I inquired, he would have dismissed me, as he did whenever I asked anything about my mother.”
Her husband had based his conclusions on rumors, not fact, and that bothered Nasira. “Have you considered talking to Stella to verify what you heard all those years ago?”
“Yes, and she stated she wasn’t at liberty to provide the details. Then she advised me to stop living in the past.”
Stella’s reluctance to clear the air was unacceptable as far as Nasira was concerned, albeit an indication of her devotion to James. But she did not feel she had the right to intervene...yet. Right now, she was thankful Sebastian had begun to open up for the first time during their union. She did not want to push her luck by applying too much pressure. “I am really very sorry about what you’ve endured, Sebastian. I wish there was more I could do or say to ease your distress.”
“I’m not distressed,” he said as he pushed back from the table and stood. “But there is something you could do.”
She could only imagine what he had in mind. “Yes?”
“Accompany me to the festival downtown.”
The request totally took her by surprise. “What festival?”
“I’m not certain. I believe it involves street vendors and a carnival. I thought it might be a good way to soak in the culture.”
Quite possibly a good way to temporarily erase the past, Nasira thought. Understandable he would want to do that, and this time she would allow it. Still, she certainly would not refuse the opportunity to spend some quality time with her husband. She came to her feet and attempted a smile. “That sounds wonderful. I suppose I should change.”
He stood, rounded the table and then touched her face. “You’re a beautiful, remarkable woman, Sira. Never think you should change for me.”
The sheer emotion in his eyes, the absolute sincerity in his voice, sent Nasira’s spirits soaring. Perhaps they had reached a turning point, the prospect of a new beginning. Yet she acknowledged they would not obtain that goal until her husband was willing to tell her the unabridged truth.
* * *
Sebastian had avoided the whole truth like a practiced coward. He hadn’t told his wife that rejecting parenthood had more to do with his fear for her safety and not his determination to avoid his father’s interference. Someday he would reveal the bitter details behind his mother’s death, but right now he wanted to leave the past behind and concentrate on the present.
With that in mind, he took Nasira’s hand into his as they strolled the streets of Royal crowded with cowboys and kids, two of whom sprinted past them on the sidewalk.
“This place is certainly full of children,” he said. “I’d expect to see the Pied Piper coming around the corner at any moment.”
Nasira sent him a frown. “This is a festival, Sebastian. What else would you expect?”
Better manners. “True. The town appears to treat procreation as a sport as revered as their Friday night Texas football.”
As they continued on, one particular display caught his curiosity and caused him to pause. “What in the bloody hell is cow patty bingo?”
Nasira’s gaze traveled to the group gathered around the exhibition. “Well, it clearly involves a cow and some sort of game board and... I believe it is best we keep walking.”
He couldn’t contain his laughter. “I could not agree more.”
They continued on past several artisans with tables full of their wares. As they approached one fresh-faced young woman with baskets of multicolored flowers, Sebastian halted, released his wife’s hand and selected a single red rose. “How much is this?”
“Two dollars,” the blonde replied. “Or six for ten dollars.”
“One will do.” He withdrew his wallet from his rear pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill. “Here you go. Keep the proceeds.”
The teen appeared awestruck. “Thanks bunches. It’s for a good cause.”
“What cause would that be?”
“A new football stadium.”
He started to argue that an orphanage would constitute a better cause, but thought better of it. “Best of luck on your venture,” he said, then turned to Nasira. “For my lovely bride.”
She took the rose and smiled as if he had offered the moon and stars, not a simple posy. “To what do I owe this wonderful gift?”
He kissed her cheek. “For agreeing to wed the likes of me.”
“Most of the time, I happen to like being wed to the likes of you.”
She might rescind her half compliment if she knew of the lies he still harbored. “Shall we take our chances on the games up ahead?”
“As long as they do not involve cow patties.”
“I believe they are games of skill involving tossing rings.”
She hooked her arm through his. “Then by all means, let us test your skills.”
Unable to help himself, Sebastian leaned over and whispered, “I’m definitely up for testing all my skills when we return to the ranch.”
He expected his spouse to deliver a derisive glare over the innuendo. Instead, he received a surprisingly sultry look. “That is altogether possible if you are a good boy tonight.”
Perhaps Rafe had been correct—simple gestures could pay off in spades.
When they traveled on toward the brightly-lit gaming booths, Sebastian spotted a young boy dressed in jeans and miniature cowboy boots, turning in circles in the middle of the sidewalk, swiping the tears furiously from his face. A group of boisterous teens approached him, seemingly oblivious to the distressed child.
Sensing disaster, Sebastian immediately removed Nasira’s hand from his arm, swept the boy up and away from the danger of getting run over by unconcerned adolescents, then set him down near a street light, away from the crowd. “Are you lost, young man?”
He turned his misty brown eyes on him and sniffed. “My dad told me not to talk to strangers.”
Sebastian took a step back so the boy wouldn’t feel threatened. “That is banner advice under normal circumstances. I only want to help you locate your parents and return you safely to them.”
The child seemed to mull that over a minute before he spoke again. “A girl was chasing me and I lost my dad.”
“What does your father look like?” Nasira asked from behind Sebastian.
When the boy turned his gaze on Nasira, he seemed to relax and smiled as if he were quite smitten. “He’s got on a cowboy hat and boots and jeans and I think a blue shirt. Where’d you get it?” he asked, looking at the rose.
“Sebastian gave it to me.” She pointed behind her. “We bought it at a booth not far from here.”
“I might want to get one of those for my...” He lowered his eyes and kicked a pebble into the street. “Mom.”
After exchanging a knowing look with Sebastian, Nasira offered him the flower. “I am certain my husband would not mind if you give her this one.”
“Not at all.” He did mind that the description of the missing parent didn’t provide much hope of immediately finding him. “Is your father tall like me?”
He nodded. “Uh huh. But he doesn’t talk funny like you. Are you from Dallas?”
Nasira laughed. “We are from London, far across the ocean.”
The child’s expression brightened. “We learned about that place in school. I’m in the second grade and I like to ride horses and... Dad!”
Clutching the rose, the boy ran straight into the arms of a man sporting a suspicious look as he headed toward them. As soon as he arrived, Sebastian thought it best to offer an explanation before the presumed father jumped to the wrong conclusion. “We found your son quite distressed and lost. It seems you’ve arrived just in the nick of time.”
“Looks that way,” the cowboy said as he eyed the flower before regarding his child. “You know better than to run off without me, Brady. Your mother’s going to skin my hide for not watching you better.”
“I didn’t mean to do it,” Brady said. “Angie was chasing me and I ran too far, I guess. And then this man picked me up before I got run over by kids and the lady gave me her flower so I could give it to Mom.”
“Mom, huh?” the father asked.
Brady shrugged and muttered, “Maybe Angie,” then turned his attention back to Nasira and Sebastian. “They’re from London. Do you know about London, Dad?”
“Yep, I do,” he replied. “I also know that I told you to stay away from people you don’t know.”
Sebastian offered his hand for a shake in an effort to reassure the man. “I’m Sebastian Edwards.”
The cowboy hesitantly accepted the gesture. “I’m Gavin McNeal, former sheriff.”
No wonder he had looked at Sebastian as if he were a deviant. “You’re no longer in law enforcement?”
His features went from rock hard to only slightly stony. “I gave that up to spend more time with this kiddo, and the one we have on the way. I’m a full-time rancher now, although I do pull deputy duty now and again if the department’s shorthanded.”
A clear message to Sebastian the cowboy could still hold his own around unwelcome strangers. “I’m certain your service to the community is very much appreciated. And to put your mind at ease, Brady did mention he wasn’t allowed to talk to strangers. Of course, I assure you our intentions were perfectly honorable.”
“Yes, they were.” Nasira moved to Sebastian’s side. “However, my husband has forgotten his manners as he has failed to introduce me.”
That could be a rather large strike against him. “My apologies. This is my wife, Nasira.”
“I am Rafiq bin Saleed’s sister,” Nasira added. “You might know him.”
“Only by reputation,” Gavin said. “I did hear something about some folks from England staying at the Shakirs’ place, so I assume that’s you. My ranch isn’t too far from there and my wife, Valerie, and Fiona are fairly good friends.”
Apparently news traveled at warp speed in this dusty Texas town. “We’re only going to be here for a few weeks. Do you have any suggestions on sights we should see while we’re here?”
“You should have dinner at the Texas Cattleman’s Club,” he said. “And when you do, be sure to check out the statue of Jessamine Golden. That’s my wife’s great-great-grandmother.”
“I have seen the statue,” Nasira said. “But I am sure my husband will find it quite interesting.”
Brady began tugging on his father’s hand to garner his attention. “Can we go ride the roller coaster now?”
“Sure thing, bud, as soon as I find your mama, who was hanging out near the arts and crafts last time I looked.” Gavin regarded them again. “Nice to meet you folks, and thanks for corralling the kid. What do you say to Mr. and Mrs. Edwards, Brady?”
“Thank you for getting me not lost and for giving me the flower.”
“You are quite welcome,” Sebastian said.
“Goodbye, Brady,” Nasira added. “I hope you have a wonderful time this evening, and I am certain Angie will appreciate the rose.”
Gavin took Brady’s hand and touched the brim of his hat. “Have a good night, folks.”
Watching father and son walked away, Sebastian experienced a good deal of regret as he remembered a time in the distant past when he’d had the same relationship with his own father. The relationship that at one time he’d hoped to have with his own son, until he realized the lack of wisdom in that. He was amused as Brady started chattering about the funny-talking man being a superhero, and did they have those in London?
The comment caused Sebastian to chuckle. “From shipping magnate to superhero. Quite a leap.”
Nasira tucked her arm into his again as they started down the sidewalk. “I would thoroughly disagree. You are a natural-born rescuer.”
He frowned. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
She tipped her head against his shoulder. “I would. In a sense you rescued me.”
He had never looked at his marriage offer in that way, but he understood why she might. “Perhaps I saved you from a life of misery with a forced marriage to a man chosen for you, but you would have found a way out of the predicament without my assistance.”
“I suppose that is possible,” she said. “But I am glad that I met you that night at the gala.”
“I’m grateful you gave me a second glance considering all those potential suitors surrounding you.”
“Yes, but not one offered to whisk me away in their Bentley.”
They exchanged a smile and walked on in silence, but one question nagged at Sebastian. “Have you enjoyed our life together, Sira?”
She paused a moment before answering. “We have had wonderful adventures and amazing travel. You have introduced me to many new experiences.”
“No regrets?”
“Only one.”
“What would that be?” he asked though he already knew the answer.
“We have no children.”
He had strolled right into that one. “I understand you’re still mourning the loss, yet I can’t understand why you would want to risk your health after you had such a difficult pregnancy.”
She stopped and faced him. “Life is not without risk, Sebastian. And at times risk comes with precious rewards.”
He didn’t know how to answer to satisfy her needs. He didn’t know if he would ever want to enter that territory again. “Speaking of risks, would you care to climb on that giant Ferris wheel and take it for a spin?”
Nasira glanced over her shoulder then regarded him with a frown. “You know I am afraid of heights.”
“You have no need to be afraid while in the presence of a superhero.”
She smiled. “This is true. If I agree, will you promise to hold on to me?”
“You may count on my undivided attention.”
“Then yes, I will join you on that contraption, and hope I do live long enough to regret it.”
Sebastian led Nasira to the line of people awaiting their turn on the ride. When their time came, he approached the elderly gentleman in charge of the ride and withdrew his wallet. “How much, kind sir?”
“Three tickets.”
Tickets? “I wasn’t aware we needed those.” He pulled a twenty out of his pocket. “Will this do?”
“I don’t make change, mister.”
“No change necessary.”
The attendant grinned, displaying a remarkable lack of teeth. “I guess it’ll do at that.”
“Amazing how money opens doors,” Sebastian said as they climbed into the car.
Nasira grabbed the railing and sat, looking somewhat fearful. “Amazing how rickety this ride seems.”
He lowered next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “Just hold tight to your knight.”
She surprised him with a soft kiss. “Happily, kind sir.”
When the wheel began to move, sending them up toward the night sky, Nasira closed her eyes and tensed against him. He held her tighter, stroked her arm and rested his lips against her temple. He experienced such a fierce need to keep her sheltered from harm, and a secret fear that he could not be the man she would want in the future if he couldn’t give her the child she desired.
But tonight, he could give her all his consideration and forget the chasm that still existed between them.
When they reached the top, the ride jolted to a stop, causing the car to slightly sway and his wife to clutch his thigh in a death grip. Stifling a wince, Sebastian lifted her hand and kissed her palm. “Open your eyes, sweetheart.”
“Must I?”
“No, but you’re missing an extraordinary view.”
After a few seconds ticked off, she finally lifted her lids and looked around. “I must admit, all the lights are beautiful. They remind me of our holiday together two years ago.”
While she must have been struck by sentimentality, he was hit by some rather sexual memories. “Ah, yes. Rome. We barely left the room.”
“That is not true. We had several meals on the veranda.”
He brushed a kiss across her lips. “That’s not all we did on that veranda.”
Her smile arrived slowly. “True. You have always been quite devilish when we travel.”
“And you are always quite willing to dance with the devil.”
“Evidently I cannot resist your charms.”
He pushed her hair away from her shoulder. “Would you be willing to dance with me later tonight?”
Without giving him a verbal response, Nasira wrapped her hand around his nape and pulled his mouth to hers, taking Sebastian by surprise. As the ride began to move again, picking up speed, they continued to kiss as if they were youngsters in the throes of first love. But they weren’t youngsters. They were husband and wife in the midst of a troubled marriage, yet he felt as if this could be the path to healing.
When the ride bumped to a stop, they finally ended the kiss only to be met by applause, whistles and catcalls. Sebastian helped Nasira out of the car and they rushed away, then paused and shared in a few laughs.
Nasira wrapped her arms around his waist. “I do believe you have ruined my reputation.”
He pressed a kiss on her forehead. “If you agree to return to the ranch now, I will endeavor to ruin it more.”
She studied his eyes for a few moments, as if searching for something unknown there. “Sebastian, I....”
“What, sweetheart?”
“I think that is a marvelous idea.”
* * *
Saying what she had wanted to say would have been a horrible idea.
Still, Nasira had come very close to voicing an emotion she had never admitted to him, or to herself, during their decade together. She loved him, and most likely had for many years. Love had not been a goal in their marriage. A marriage based on convenience and mutual need. Yet somehow she had introduced the emotion into the union when she had allowed Sebastian into her life, and into her heart.
That did not change the fact that her husband might not feel more than fondness for her. That did not negate that they wanted to journey down different paths and if he had his way, their future would not include having a child.
Yet as she rode back to the ranch, her hand resting lightly in Sebastian’s, she did not care about compromise or doubts. She only wanted to enjoy this night with her husband in the event these memorable moments might be their last.
She leaned back against the headrest and sighed. “I realized something tonight that I have never considered before.”
“You are not so afraid of heights?”
“No. I enjoy country living.”
“That’s why we have the country home in Bath to escape the hectic pace in London proper.”
“I know, yet I feel a certain freedom here. It does sound odd, I suppose.”
He pulled beneath the portico and shut off the ignition. “This place does afford quite a bit of privacy, which reminds me.” He reached into the back of the car, retrieved a silver bag full of pink tissue and handed it to her.
“What is this?”
“Open it and you’ll see.”
She rummaged around and withdrew a bathing suit that was little more than a labyrinth of turquoise strings. “I have never flown a kite in the dark.”
“Very amusing. We both need to relax, and what better way to do that than to swim.”
“Isn’t it too cool to swim?”
“The spa and pool are both heated.”
She could imagine they would generate their own heat, yet she worried about the privacy issue. “I would still have to get out of the spa or pool.” She shook the swimsuit at him. “This barely covers anything at all. What if someone happens upon us?”
“You have a robe, do you not?”
“Yes.”
“Besides, you have a remarkable body. Why not show it off?”
“I do not think it is wise to show off my body this much when two other people reside on the property.”
“Two people who’ve been instructed to give us complete solitude.”
He had supported his arguments much too well, drat him. “All right. I will join you in a swim.” She pointed at him. “But only for a swim. Heaven knows I wouldn’t want to be caught doing anything else.”
He gave her a winning grin, the one that had always won her over. Patently sensual, and slightly wicked. “Yes, dear. Only a swim.”
As much as she would like to trust him, Nasira was not sure she should. Trouble was, could she trust herself?