Читать книгу No Place Like Home - Maxine Morrey, Maxine Morrey - Страница 10

Ellie fastened her seatbelt and looked out of the window. She had a connecting flight to make in Texas but hidden behind the sunglasses and cap, she felt a little more relaxed, safer from peoples’ enquiring eyes. Now that she was actually going, she couldn’t wait to see Sandy.

Sandy Danvers was Ellie’s oldest and dearest friend. When Ellie was seven, her father had been promoted which meant a move from London to Kansas. He’d worried initially how his shy daughter, their only child, would deal with the transition from their busy London life to one that would be far more rural, not to mention uprooting her from her friends. He needn’t have worried.

The company found them a beautiful house with a huge garden – or yard, as his liaison had informed him it was called – and, apparently, the neighbours were quite delightful. Having dealt with plenty of sales people over his career, Andrew Laing had taken this with a large pinch of salt. But once they’d arrived, he’d had to concede that it hadn’t just been good sales patter. The neighbours, Mr and Mrs Danvers, really were delightful. A family of six, their eldest two boys were at college so only home on holidays. The next one down was a boy, Ben, who would be going off to college in a couple of years’ time and their youngest was a girl of Ellie’s age, Sandy. She’d immediately taken his daughter under her wing, as her parents had done with him and his wife.

Eight years on, another promotion meant that the Laings would be returning home to England. Andrew knew that any job he took would be easier than telling his daughter that they were leaving Kansas – and so it had proved. Promises of long summer vacations and Easter breaks had done nothing to ease the pain for either of the distraught teenagers. They’d been inseparable almost since the day the Laings had moved in. Forcing them apart had given him more than one sleepless night, wondering if taking this new position had been the right thing to do.

Now, Ellie watched the little luggage trucks whizzing around on the tarmac outside the plane’s small oval window as her mind drifted back to the time she’d had to tell her best friend her family was moving back home. It was funny. She remembered saying those exact words all those years ago. And yet, sitting on the Danvers’ front swing with Sandy, she’d already felt like she was home.

As much as they knew their parents had hoped they’d come to terms with it, two weeks after the announcement had been made, Ellie remembered them still moping together on that same swing when Sandy’s older brother, Ben, had returned home from a day out with friends. After finishing his music degree, he’d returned to the family home while pursuing his dream of becoming a professional musician. He played as part of a band that was popular at functions, and was always writing and recording songs, but over the past year he’d also been spending more time out in Nashville. Nine years younger than Ben, Sandy was the baby of the family and as such had always been a little protected, especially by him. Ellie knew her friend missed her big brother when he was away, but she was wise enough and had a big enough heart to know that was where he needed to be in order to follow his dream. Ellie, however, knew that they had both been thankful to see his kind, handsome face that day. She cast her mind back now to how he’d done his best to comfort them that day.

*

Looking ahead to the porch, Ben saw his teenage baby sister and her best friend Ellie resting against each other on the porch swing. A soft early evening Kansas breeze ruffled Sandy’s dark, and Ellie’s red hair as they sat in silent sadness. Ben mounted the steps, gave them another glance and took a chair opposite with a sigh. Two pairs of eyes flicked up to his. Sandy raised her eyebrows in a ‘hey’. Ellie half smiled but her jewel green eyes remained sad.

‘Hey.’ Silence.

‘I guess Mom and Dad already did the vacations and stuff speech, huh?’

Sandy gave a shrug with the level of indignation only capable of a wronged teenager. ‘It’s not the same, Ben.’

‘No, I know, but sometimes we have to take what we get and make the best of it.’

The two girls looked up at him again. Sandy adored Ben but this didn’t prevent her giving him a fifteen-year-old’s disdainful ‘What?’ look.

‘And don’t give me that look either. It’s just that things aren’t always easy and I know this is really hard for you two but at least there are the vacations – think how jealous all the other kids will be when you tell them where you’re spending yours! Pretty cool to have your best friend abroad. You’ll get to visit each year, travel without your parents, have cute accents that boys’ll like …’

His words percolated in their brains for a few moments and Ben saw the slightest flicker of change in their demeanours. The girls added a couple of their own thoughts and very gradually started to see a few possible upsides of the situation – though obviously they would still have preferred Ellie to remain in the States and thought it vastly unfair of everyone involved to tear them apart. That was a rock solid fact that would never change. Ben stood and left them to the plans they were now making about where they would go together in London. One hand on the front door handle, he threw a look back.

‘Hey?’

The girls looked up.

‘Don’t say anything to Mum and Dad – or you, Ellie – about what I said about boys and cute accents. OK?’

Two grins full of metal braces were his reply – and reassurance.

Disappearing into the cool of the house, Ben smiled wryly to himself and shook his head. Those two were going to be heartbreakers, accents or not.

*

Ellie wearily took her seat in the jet that would now take her from Texas to Kansas, where Sandy would meet her. She didn’t usually manage to sleep too much on planes but it seemed this time her body planned to take advantage of any opportunity it had to grab some extra rest, and she’d dozed on and off on the initial flight. At least Ellie had no worries of having to wait around at the airport for a while – Sandy was a stickler for punctuality. Always had been. Ellie laid her head back against the seat as the engines gained power and forced the jet into the sky. It was over a year since she had seen Sandy in person. The time just seemed to fly by and they hadn’t been able to firm up any plans for visits. Not to mention that planning much at all hadn’t been easy since she’d been with Carl. He’d never liked her seeing any friends or doing anything that didn’t involve him. She swallowed and pushed him out of her mind. There was no need for him to be in her thoughts now. He’d already taken far too much from her. She steered her mind in a more pleasant direction.

With Sandy, for the moment, still living at home in the large family house, something Ellie knew both she and her parents were loving, Ellie would also get to see Molly and Ted Danvers, Sandy’s parents. As the friends had last met up over in England, it was now over two years since Ellie had seen the people she considered her second family, and she loved hearing about the rest of the family, and the pride that rang in their voices as Molly and Ted spoke about Sandy and their boys.

Her mind drifted to the brothers. The eldest had already been at college and living their own lives when the Laings had first moved out to the States, but they had got to know them over the holidays and Joseph and Matt were both pleasant, witty and intelligent.

‘Lovely manners,’ her mother would always say after talking to any of the Danvers’ offspring.

But Ben was different, and that special bond he and Sandy had made the relationship different too. This was no doubt helped by the fact that his easygoing manner resulted in his giving them rides all over town once he’d passed his driving test. Sandy idolised Ben and everyone knew the feeling was mutual. They were even closer in looks than their brothers. Although there was no mistaking the three men were brothers, Ben’s colouring more resembled his father’s and thereby Sandy’s. Joe and Matt were both blonde-haired blue-eyed All-American boys, whereas both Sandy and Ben’s hair was dark. Sandy had also inherited her father’s soft brown eyes but on this the two differed, and Ben, as with his brother’s, followed the maternal line of a pale ice-blue. The clear intensity of them combined with almost black hair made a truly striking combination.

Ben’s dreams had also been far removed from that of all his siblings. Matt and Joe had both studied business and were now well established in the family company. Sandy had shown a keen business acumen at an early age and declared her intentions to study law, encouraged by Ben’s best friend Tyler. Her wish was to then join the legal team at the family firm but she knew she’d have to prove herself worthy, and wouldn’t just get a job there because of who she was. A bad lawyer could cost the business, and therefore her family, a lot of money. Sandy had approached her studies seriously. She’d been interviewed by the business’ legal team along with other candidates for the position. Sandy had been top of her class, and had the quickest, smartest answers of all of them and was now part of the family firm, as per her dream.

The youngest son was the only one who’d never shown the slightest interest in business. Ben’s heart had always been in music. He liked nothing better than to sit out on the porch swing quietly playing a tune he’d written or a favourite he’d heard on the radio. Although only next door, the girls were always sleeping over at one another’s houses, and they would lie in their beds as the warm Kansas wind gently sucked the curtains in and out, listening to the quiet strums of Ben’s guitar and the whispered lyrics as he unintentionally soothed them to sleep.

Ellie thought about Ben. Tall, kind, gorgeous and now married to a model he’d met at a charity function their band had performed at. She hadn’t seen him for years. His devotion to music had paid off and he was now the lead guitarist in a successful country band. They’d already had two number ones in the US country chart and their current song was climbing both the country and the regular charts after being used in a huge box office success, which had brought them even more fans.

In the past Ben had told her that he knew he was lucky he’d been allowed to tread his own path and would be ever thankful to his family for that. Just the thought of sitting behind a desk all day had sent shivers down his spine. In turn, his family, and Ellie, were overjoyed for him. All he’d ever wanted was to play music and now that dream was reality.

*

Having checked her phone again for the hundredth time, Sandy’s dark eyes scanned the travellers as she squeezed Todd’s hand in nervous anticipation.

‘Honey, you’re going to break my hand.’

Sandy turned and smiled as she lessened the grip on her fiancé. As soon as she’d told him about Ellie coming to visit, and the main reason behind it, he’d volunteered to drive her to the airport, saying that it would let them catch up without having to worry about concentrating on driving. She was glad now that he had, as nerves and excitement and concern all bubbled within her while she continued to watch the gates for the first sign of her friend.

What Todd hadn’t mentioned was that it was his concern for the woman he loved that compelled him to rearrange his day at the last minute in order to drive her to and from the airport.

Todd’s family had been friends with the Danvers for years but it was only a couple of years ago that his and Sandy’s friendship had deepened into something more. Every time he thought about that, he kicked himself for not seeing what an incredible woman she was sooner and at the thought of all the time he’d wasted not being with her. One night, after a couple too many beers, he’d confided this to his brother-in-law. Ben was, and had always been, as much of a brother to him as if they’d had the same blood running through their veins. Ben had just smiled, squeezed his shoulder and told him that sometimes people had to go through the things they did in order to appreciate the right thing – or person – when it was the right time.

Todd had met Ellie very briefly a couple of times when they were kids but not properly since he and Sandy had been dating. He’d seen her on Skype but if he was around when they called, he was usually shooed lovingly out of the room so that, as Sandy said, she could talk about him. But he knew how close the two women were and, if the information Zak had given Sandy was accurate, his fiancée was likely in for more of a shock than she thought when she saw her friend. She’d told him she was prepared but he didn’t know if she was prepared enough. If he was right, the shock of seeing a woman as close as a sister bruised and battered was going to impact her harder than she thought. For Todd, offering to drive was a no brainer.

Beside him, Sandy was still scanning the crowds, jittering back and forth.

‘There she is! Oh!’ She squinted a little. ‘She cut her hair.’

Todd followed Sandy’s frowning gaze to see a slim woman, about Sandy’s height, with a red, chin-length bob under a baseball cap. Her eyes were hidden behind rose-tinted aviator-style sunglasses.

‘Ellie!’ Sandy called, rushing to the end of the barrier and pulling her friend into a big hug.

Ellie stiffened involuntarily and eased away a little. Sandy pulled back. From a distance, Todd watched the concern on his fiancée’s face. He had a feeling that was only going to increase once those sunglasses were removed.

‘Ribs,’ Ellie explained, an awkward smile on her face.

‘Jeez. I’m so sorry, honey. You OK?’ Sandy took her friend’s free hand, closing both of her own around it.

‘Yep. Fine. Fine.’

‘I almost didn’t recognise you. You didn’t tell me you cut your hair.’

Ellie withdrew her hand and tugged at the hat, a shadow passing across her face. ‘I hate it.’

‘OK, so then we don’t talk about it. Let’s go home.’

Ellie nodded. Sandy had used the right phrase. It did always feel like coming home when she came back to Kansas. Seeing her friend at last, in addition to the emotional and physical rollercoaster she’d just come off, had made her throat tight. For a moment, she didn’t trust herself to speak.

‘Oh!’ Sandy remembered her manners. ‘Obviously this is Todd.’

Todd smiled and held out his hand. ‘It’s really great to meet you properly at last. Although obviously I wish it were under different circumstances.’

Ellie gave a smile, although to Todd it looked a little stiff and he guessed the make-up she wore hid more damage. ‘Yes. Me too.’

He touched her arm very gently and briefly, silently adding to his fiancée’s reassurance that she was safe now. ‘Let me get that,’ he said, reaching for the handle of the luggage trolley. Sandy took Ellie’s arm and tucked it through her own as they walked to the car. As Todd busied himself loading the case into the trunk, the women got in the cab and made themselves comfortable.

‘Can I see?’ Sandy asked quietly.

Ellie paused then lowered her head. Slowly she removed the cap and carefully removed the glasses.

Behind them, Todd shut the cover of the pick-up. Hesitantly, Ellie looked back at Sandy.

‘Oh, Ellie,’ Sandy cried softly, tears welling in her eyes. Immediately, she pulled her friend to her once again, this time remembering the delicate ribs.

‘All set?’ Todd asked brightly as he got in, looking up from the ignition when he got no reply. Sandy was wiping her eyes on a tissue, and her friend’s head was bent towards her, but Todd could now see the damage she’d been hiding. His mouth set in an angry line. Settling his breath, concentrating on driving rather than anger, he turned the engine over and pulled out. As he turned the corner, his peripheral vision caught Ellie’s bruises again. He just couldn’t understand guys that did that to women. Women they claimed to love! To Todd, those guys were the lowest of the low. There was no excuse to hit a woman. Ever. It really was that simple. Thankfully, Sandy had told him that at least this guy had now been arrested and Ellie was finished with him. For good. Glancing across again, Todd really hoped that was true.

The two women sat quietly in the car on the way to the Danvers’ family home, their hands gripped in an unspoken gesture of friendship and support. There was so much to say but when she’d removed the sunglasses, the exhaustion in Ellie’s eyes was clear for anyone to see.

After a few miles, Sandy brightened.

‘Hey, want some music on? I have Ben’s latest album on my phone.’

‘That’d be great.’ Sandy tapped her phone and scrolled for a moment. Soon the familiar sound of Ben’s music filled the car. Ellie rested her head back against the seat, her hand still tightly within her friend’s, and let the music surround her.

*

Molly Danvers was out on the porch before the car pulled up. As they stopped, she hurried down the driveway towards them. Ellie looked up, seeing Ted as he stood back by the house.

As much as Ellie wanted to be wrapped in the comfort of her own family, for the moment, she had kept the truth from them, having asked the Danvers to do the same. Still great friends with the Laings, they had been reluctant, but agreed to Ellie’s wishes not to worry them, understanding her reasons.

Andrew Laing’s blood pressure had always been fairly high. A career that he found both stressful and rewarding had only contributed to a genetic propensity to readings higher than was ideal. He’d been making changes and things had appeared to be going in the right direction but on a visit about eight months ago, Ellie had found her father looking grey and her mother looking worried. He’d laughed it off, saying that it was fine, his attention more focused on the bruise on his daughter’s temple, something she had explained away as a tennis injury from a friend’s wayward racket. Thankfully, they’d accepted it. She had wanted to tell them everything – how much Carl had changed since they’d moved in together and how she wasn’t sure what to do now, that he’d promised it would never happen again, and had surrounded her with attention and gifts since it had happened – but couldn’t. She’d always valued her parents’ opinions but looking at them both that day, she knew she couldn’t ask them about it. Not right then. They clearly had enough to worry about. As Carl’s behaviour got worse, so had her father’s health and she’d had to time her visits to when any bruises she had were out of sight.

Six months ago, she’d been woken with a call from her mother who, in an eerily calm manner, had told her that they were at the hospital and that her dad had suffered a massive heart attack. Her mum’s calm manner had frightened Ellie more than any hysterical crying could have done. It was almost as though she had already accepted something that her daughter just wasn’t prepared to. She couldn’t even remember the drive that day and had ended up with a fine in the car park as her mind had been on her dad rather than feeding a meter.

Andrew Laing’s heart had stopped once in the ambulance as they raced to the hospital, but the paramedics had managed to resuscitate him, his distraught wife watching on. Having been informed at the nurse’s station that her dad was still in surgery, Ellie had run to the waiting room and found her mum, and together they had just sat. And waited. Several hours later, the surgeon had come to them, his face unreadable. Ellie’s mum’s brave façade had crumbled before he’d even opened his mouth. When he told them that her husband was stable but critical, having once more arrested on the operating table, Ellie thought her mum’s heart would break from sobbing. She’d held her as tightly as she could, almost as if by holding her so close she could keep her, and perhaps both of them, from falling apart.

She’d finally persuaded her mum to get a little rest but not until she’d been allowed to see her husband, just for a few moments. The medical team understood that she’d needed that moment, that reassurance that the man she loved was still here, at least for now and hopefully for a lot longer yet. After, Ellie had sat there holding her mother’s hand as her head lay in her lap, a reversal of roles for the night.

Thankfully her dad had fought for his life and it had been the catalyst for her parents changing their lifestyle in a more dramatic way. They sold the large house in Surrey they’d lived in since returning home to England, cut down on their social commitments and found a small, but beautiful cottage in a tiny village down by the sea in Cornwall. It had recently been renovated to a very high standard so there was nothing to be done but relax and enjoy the life that had been spared. It had been a huge scare for all of them and, however much he told his wife and daughter that they were fussing, Ellie knew her dad had been scared too. The ease with which he’d agreed to her mum’s plan of cultivating a much quieter life proved that. The change had been good for them and Ellie had no intention of putting any undue stress their way. She would tell them, in time. And she knew they’d be upset with her for not telling them – but she also knew they’d understand.

‘Ellie, darlin,’ Molly said, pushing the auburn curls back from the forehead. ‘Oh, sweetheart,’ she whispered, pulling the young woman to her.

‘Mind her ribs, Mama,’ Sandy warned, her own voice thick with emotion. Molly wrapped an arm around each of them and together they walked back to the house.

‘Thanks for letting me stay here.’

‘Don’t be silly, honey. Of course you’d stay here.’

Ted Danvers studied Ellie’s face as she walked up the steps. Leaning down, he kissed the unbruised cheek as he gently hugged her.

‘You’ll be alright now.’

Ellie nodded. He was right. She would.

‘Right!’ Molly said, discreetly wiping her eye. ‘Let’s get you people something to eat.’ With that, she chivvied them all inside and Ellie was soon wrapped up in the warmth and love of the Danvers’ family home.

*

A few days later, Ellie and Sandy were preparing dinner together in the kitchen, with the aid of a bottle of wine, when they heard a key in the front door. Ted and Molly had gone out earlier and weren’t due back for a while yet, so grabbing another quick sip of wine, Sandy went to investigate. In the hall, she met Ben and his wife Cyndi slipping off their coats.

‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, her tone wary.

Ben pulled a face at his sister’s unusually reserved greeting. ‘Nice to see you too, kid.’

Sandy shifted her weight, before throwing a quick glance back towards the kitchen. When she didn’t offer any further explanation for her lack of enthusiasm, Ben continued.

‘We were just passing through. Thought we’d stop and say hi.’ He bent and kissed her on the cheek, ‘And see what’s for dinner, obviously.’ He grinned and Sandy smiled back. Ben’s smile tended to make people do that – it was infectious. Plus, she loved the fact that, despite everything, he didn’t change. His mum’s cooking was still the best in his eyes. She noticed Cyndi standing serenely behind her husband, running a hand over her already perfect hair. Of course, Sandy pondered, he probably didn’t have a lot to compare it to, excepting his own. From what she gathered, his wife was not a natural in the kitchen. And by ‘not a natural’, she meant ‘had never cooked in her life and had no intention of starting now’.

Cyndi had apparently tried insisting on a cook and while Ben had always attempted to do whatever made his wife happy, he’d remained firm on that subject. The thought of someone else being in the house most of the day made him feel uncomfortable. He’d explained to Sandy as he had tried explaining it to his wife, that if he was writing and fancied a sandwich he wanted to be able to pad in and make himself one without feeling like he was in the way in his own home. While Sandy understood, Cyndi had merely pointed out that he would just be able to ask the cook to make him one, completely missing his point. He’d given up trying to explain but had insisted on no cook. If she wanted one when he was away and she remained behind – not that she ever tended to – then that was fine with him. But until then, either he’d cook or they’d get take out. Or see what his mom had in the oven.

‘Hey, Cyndi.’

‘Hello.’ Cyndi gave the briefest of smiles as she stepped towards Sandy and did two air kisses. It was her latest habit. Oh man!

‘Um, Ben.’ Sandy began as she finished mentally rolling her eyes and took Cyndi’s beautiful and very expensive coat. ‘Ellie’s staying for a few days.’

‘Really? That’s great! I didn’t know she was coming over. I haven’t seen her in years!’ Ben cast his mind back, trying to remember when he’d last seen her, and couldn’t, although he did recall the short telephone conversation they’d had after his wedding.

The painting that Ellie had sent as her gift had taken his breath away. He knew how much time that would have taken her and all the four- and five-figure gifts Cyndi had put on their list – an act that still made Ben cringe – couldn’t come close to meaning what hers had.

Sandy had been chatting to Ellie on the phone when they’d dropped round after opening all the presents and, popping into the kitchen, he’d apologised for disturbing his sister as she’d sat on a kitchen stool with her feet tucked up, perched up like a gnome – a position that had always made Ben nervous. When his sister had told him who it was, he’d spontaneously taken the phone and said hi, wanting to thank Ellie personally having been disappointed she couldn’t make the wedding.

What he hadn’t expected was the reaction he’d felt on hearing Ellie’s soft voice and gentle laugh after all these years. And, of course, that accent. Oh man, that accent! Passing the phone back to Sandy, he’d hurriedly got the glass of wine for Cyndi he’d originally gone into the kitchen for and returned to the living room. She’d pouted at the few minutes’ delay as she took it, remonstrating as she did so. Across the room, he’d seen his parents drop their gaze and pretend not to notice his wife’s nitpicking. He knew they weren’t the only ones. Ben wasn’t stupid. He hadn’t expected the whirlwind of their romance to last forever, knowing it would transition into something even more beautiful. Everyone knew there was a honeymoon period. But he had expected the honeymoon period to at least outlast the honeymoon itself.

Things would settle in time, he knew, so he’d given his wife a gentle kiss, taken her hand and tried to forget that his kid sister’s best friend was now no longer a kid and had a soft, unbelievably sexy voice.

That night, he’d lain in bed, guilt eating him up. Cyndi might not have been the woman that his family and friends would have chosen for him but he loved her, and he was, and always would be, a one-woman man. He’d put the phone call out of his mind and replaced it instead with an image of the two girls as annoying nine-year-olds. It had worked. Ellie had become just his kid sister’s best friend again. But he’d always enjoyed her company and would be glad to see her again now.

‘Ben, there’s something you should know first,’ Sandy began as she turned and hung Cyndi’s butter-soft, full-length leather coat on the hook. ‘Ellie’s …’ Sandy turned back to finish her explanation. Ben and Cyndi had gone.

‘Damn!’ She hurried after them, entering the kitchen just as Ellie responded to the call of her name.

‘Jesus Christ!’ Ben exclaimed.

Ellie’s bruised face was a mixture of shock, horror and embarrassment. She wasn’t expecting to see Ben or his perfect-looking wife – and certainly not unprepared like this. Heavy silence hung in the air for a second, all of them unmoving.

‘Excuse me,’ Ellie said, faintly, her head low as she fumbled for the back-door handle, trying to exit with as much dignity as she could, although right now she felt like the little she’d clung on to had just been totally shredded.

Walking almost blindly down the garden, she hurried along the path that wound through the large space towards the ancient, gnarled tree at the end. A rope swing hung from one of its thick branches. Ellie sat heavily on its wooden seat, worn and shiny with use. The wind rustled the leaves and gently creaked the swing to and fro. The breeze felt good on her face, exposed as it was now in this safe, hidden corner. In her mind, she saw again the shock and horror on Ben’s face, the revulsion on Cyndi’s, and closed her eyes. She felt ugly, her face hurt, and her whole body felt like she’d been run over by a truck. Right now, all she wanted was to curl up in a dark corner and stay there.

Back in the kitchen, Sandy had already exploded at her brother. ‘Great! Thanks a lot, Ben!’ Ben turned and stared at his sister, unable to think for a moment.

‘What happened to her face?’ Cyndi asked, her nose still screwed up in distaste.

Sandy was in no mood to be patient or polite. ‘Her ex-boyfriend happened to her face. He had a bad day so he came home and beat the crap out of Ellie. Again! And right now, she’s feeling pretty fragile and worthless and unattractive and both your reactions have really helped, so thank you so much!’ she yelled, fury making her accent thick.

‘Well, I guess she doesn’t exactly look that attractive at the moment,’ Cyndi blurted.

Sandy’s eyes widened and she opened her mouth, about to unleash a torrent at her sister-in-law but Ben got there first.

‘Be quiet, Cyndi,’ he said softly, before heading to the door that Ellie had just left through. Closing it behind him, he left the two women alone in the kitchen.

Sandy stood staring at Cyndi for a moment, anger still flashing in her dark eyes. Keeping her thoughts to herself, for Ben’s sake more than anyone else’s, she stalked across the hall to the study and slammed the door, leaving Cyndi alone.

*

Ben had never felt so sorry in all his life. Just the bombshell of seeing Ellie like that, so bruised and battered, had stunned him. And then, as she’d looked from him to his wife and then Sandy, like a fawn caught in headlights, not knowing which way to run, he’d felt an overwhelming desire to pull her to him, kiss her battered face, and promise that no one would ever hurt her again, that he would always keep her safe. The shock of that unbidden thought had kept him entirely rooted to the spot. The picture he’d kept in his mind of the annoying nine-year-olds had now been totally obliterated by the image of the woman in front of him.

She was sitting on their old swing, bare feet dangling above the ground, head resting on the twisted rope support as one slow, sad tear rolled down her face. He stopped and watched her for a moment. Despite what his wife had said, Ben could see through the bruising, and, as he stood there, what he saw was a beautiful woman. And what he felt terrified him.

Ellie caught his presence from the corner of her eye and turned her head a little more towards the rope, away from him.

‘Ellie? Ellie honey, I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s OK. Really.’ She shook her head in forgiveness but declined to look at him. Ben felt worse.

‘No. No it’s not.’ His voice was soft as he walked over and hunkered down in front of the swing. Still, she kept her head turned away. ‘It was insensitive. I – I was just shocked, I guess.’

‘That makes two of us then.’ A ghost of a half-smile showed on her lips but she refused to meet his eyes.

‘Hey, there’s that smile.’ Ellie didn’t respond. ‘Are you going to look at me?’ he asked softly. He tentatively rested his hand on hers and, after a moment, she curled a single finger around it.

She shook her head and the salty tear dropped and landed on Ben’s jeans, a dark blob on the faded denim.

‘Why not?’

Her voice cracked as she whispered her reply. ‘I don’t even want to look at me.’

‘Oh, sweetheart,’ Ben whispered as he stood, gently pulling her up with him as he did so, wrapping his arms around her. ‘It’s OK. Everything’s OK now. I promise.’

It was all that was needed to breach the fragile dam she had built in an attempt to keep back the flood of emotions bursting within her. Feeling secure in her friend’s strong embrace, hidden from the world, Ellie began to sob. Great painful issues wracked her whole body as Ben curled his palm around the back of her head, holding her close as she let out the frustration and pain, the disappointment and fear that she’d been doing her best to hide from. Broken words filtered out every now and then, but she was so upset Ben couldn’t make them out, so he just held her until she had cried herself out.

Ellie pulled away from him, searching self-consciously in her skirt pocket for a handkerchief. Finding one, she wiped her eyes and nose, keeping her gaze lowered.

‘Oh no,’ A look of concern furrowed her brow as she pointed at his shirt.

A large wet patch showed just below the shoulder where she had buried her head. Ben looked down and smiled, trying not to die a little bit at the worry he saw in her expression.

‘It’ll dry.’ He shrugged.

‘I’m so sorry. I—’

‘It’s OK,’ he interrupted. ‘Really. Needed a wash anyway.’

Slowly, gently, he placed one finger under her chin and tipped her face to his. ‘I said it’s OK.’

Finally, she lifted his eyes to meet his. Ben looked down into those startling green eyes, now swollen and red-rimmed. One was still half closed and surrounded by a rainbow-coloured bruise, as was her temple and jaw.

‘How could anyone do this?’

‘Please don’t. You’ll start me off again.’

He nodded, forcing a smile that thankfully, this time, received the smallest of ones in reply as she held the gaze momentarily.

*

Cyndi and Ben had stayed to dinner but Sandy had put Ellie to bed as soon as she returned from the garden with Ben, saying she’d bring her something to eat later. The tearstains on Ellie’s face and her brother’s shirt had told enough of the story.

‘I’m not tired, Sands.’

‘I know but you’re having a rest anyway,’ Sandy replied, ignoring the protest and pulling the cover over her friend.

‘You’re worse than my mum!’

‘I’ll check on you later.’ Sandy smiled, kissing her friend on the forehead before leaving the room.

Ellie lay on the bed and watched the evening sun painting colours in the sky. She really wasn’t tired but her head was pounding from all the crying. Maybe closing her eyes would make it go away.

*

Ben walked out with Sandy to collect their coats.

‘I really didn’t mean to upset her. You know I wouldn’t have done that for the world.’

‘I know.’ Sandy hugged him. ‘Ellie knows that too. Actually, although it probably wasn’t the kindest way of going about it, I think it did her good. She’s been trying to be brave and strong when she really needed to just give in and release it all. Start afresh from there.’

‘I guess.’

‘And your complete lack of tact seemed to do the trick!’

Ben looked pained. Then he caught the glint in her eye and pulled a face. Shoving the two coats at her.

‘I’m going to say goodbye to Ellie. It could be another decade before I see her again.’

‘OK. Don’t wake her if she’s still sleeping though.’

Ben tapped lightly on the door and pushed it when there was no response. She was lying, half on her back and half on her side, one arm cuddling a pillow. Her head was turned away from the window towards the door. Towards him. He knew he should leave but he couldn’t. Not just yet.

‘Is she still asleep?’ Sandy poked her head around the door.

Ben flushed, glad of the low light. ‘Yeah,’ he whispered back

Sandy entered the room and stood at Ben’s side, then looked down at her friend’s sleeping form,

‘She looks peaceful. That’s good.’ From the corner of her eye, she saw her brother’s face twitch in anger. Nudging him, she derailed his thoughts. ‘Come on. She wouldn’t appreciate us spying on her.’

Ben looked back at Ellie, stepped across and momentarily covered her hand with his own. She didn’t stir.

‘Bye, Ellie,’ he whispered.

Sandy quickly closed the shutters and then followed her brother out, shutting the door behind her. Ben hadn’t moved.

‘Why did she let him do this?’ True confusion showed in Ben’s clear blue eyes. Sandy couldn’t help her surprise. This wasn’t like Ben. Normally, he just dealt with things, fixed what he could and accepted what he couldn’t. Taking things in his stride had always been his thing. However, his comment made her frown.

‘I don’t think she had much of a choice in the matter, Ben. It’s not like she asked him to do it!’

‘No, of course not. I didn’t mean that. I just meant, why didn’t she get out sooner. She was with him, what, over two years? He must have done this before. You said yourself that you think she had more trouble with him than she let on. Why didn’t she just leave? She’s bright and funny, and beautiful. Why’d she put up with it?’

‘Well,’ Sandy said slowly, ‘she thought she loved him. And when you love someone, I guess it’s easier to find excuses not to leave.’

‘Ben?’ Cyndi called up the stairs, that pout back on her face.

Ben looked down, startled. Molly, having returned, was stood behind her and the expression on her son’s face unsettled her. He ran a hand through his hair before pasting on a smile on for his wife, then jogged down the staircase, lifting their coats from the banister on the way. After helping Cyndi into hers, Ben shrugged into his own and headed out into the night.