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I am no match-maker – being much too well aware of the uncertainty of all human events and calculations. (PERSUASION)

On the correct response to a proposal of marriage:

What did she say? – Just what she ought, of course. A lady always does. – She said enough to show there need not be despair – and to invite him to say more himself.

EMMA

On a woman’s right to choose, and refuse:

A woman is not to marry a man merely because she is asked, or because he is attached to her, and can write a tolerable letter.

EMMA

And man’s inability to understand this …

It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage. A man always imagines a woman to be ready for anybody who asks her.

EMMA

The economic motive:

Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor – which is one very strong argument in favour of Matrimony.

(Letter to her niece Fanny Knight, 13 March 1817)

Murphy’s law of marriage:

There certainly are not so many men of large fortune in the world, as there are pretty women to deserve them.

MANSFIELD PARK

A gold-digger’s advice:

I would have everybody marry if they can do it properly; I do not like to have people throw themselves away; but everybody should marry as soon as they can do it to advantage.

MANSFIELD PARK

And an author’s warning …

Nothing can be compared to the misery of being bound without Love, bound to one, & preferring another.

(Letter to her niece Fanny Knight, 30 November 1814)

A perfect bride:

The charming Augusta Hawkins, in addition to all the usual advantages of perfect beauty and merit, was in possession of an independent fortune, of so many thousands as would always be called ten; a point of some dignity, as well as some convenience …

EMMA

And a possible groom?:

Her brother was not handsome; no, when they first saw him, he was absolutely plain … but still he was the gentleman, with a pleasing address. The second meeting proved him not so very plain; he was plain, to be sure, but then he had so much countenance, and his teeth were so good, and he was so well made, that one soon forgot he was plain; and after a third interview, after dining in company with him at the parsonage, he was no longer allowed to be called so by any body. He was, in fact, the most agreeable young man the sisters had ever known, and they were equally delighted with him. Miss Bertram’s engagement made him in equity the property of Julia, of which Julia was fully aware, and before he had been at Mansfield a week, she was quite ready to be fallen in love with.

MANSFIELD PARK

High-minded idealism versus cheerful practicality – two sisters dispute:

To be so bent on marriage – to pursue a man merely for the sake of situation – is a sort of thing that shocks me; I cannot understand it. Poverty is a great evil, but to a woman of education and feeling it ought not, it cannot be the greatest. – I would rather be a teacher at a school (and I can think of nothing worse) than marry a man I did not like.’

‘I would rather do anything than be a teacher at a school –’ said her sister. ‘I have been at school, Emma, and know what a life they lead you: you never have. – I should not like marrying a disagreeable man any more than yourself, – but I do not think there are very many disagreeable men; – I think I could like any good humoured man with a comfortable income.’

THE WATSONS

Marriage à la mode:

Mr Rushworth was from the first struck with the beauty of Miss Bertram, and being inclined to marry, soon fancied himself in love. He was a heavy young man, with not more than common sense; but as there was nothing disagreeable in his figure or address, the young lady was well pleased with her conquest. Being now in her twenty-first year, Maria Bertram was beginning to think matrimony a duty; and as a marriage with Mr Rushworth would give her the enjoyment of a larger income than her father’s, as well as ensure her the house in town, which was now a prime object, it became, by the same rule of moral obligation, her evident duty to marry Mr Rushworth if she could.