Читать книгу The Steel Girls - Michelle Rawlins - Страница 9

Monday, 28 August 1939

Her arms aching, Nancy wrung the last flannelette sheet through the mangle.

‘Thank the lord for that,’ she said, sighing to herself, desperate for a cuppa after hours of laboriously scrubbing, washing and cleaning. It was Monday, and like most of the women on Prince Street, she had been giving the house a once-over since the crack of dawn. Even before she had safely delivered her two children, Billy, seven, and five-year-old Linda, at school, Nancy had stripped the beds and beat the front-room rug with a brush over the washing line in the back yard.

She had spent the morning scrubbing the front doorstep with a donkey stone, but despite the fact it left her knuckles red raw, and numb with cold when winter came, it was one of the jobs Nancy didn’t mind. Up and down most roads across the city, women could be seen doubled over on their hands and knees, applying as much elbow grease as they did chatter with the neighbours, until their front step was spick and span. No well-respecting housewife would dream of missing the weekly ritual.

‘How you getting on, Doris?’ Nancy asked her good friend and weary-looking neighbour, as she trundled wearily out of her own front door

‘Ah, not so bad.’ Doris smiled, her eyes drooping despite it just turning ten thirty. ‘Nothing a good brew and eight hours of solid sleep wouldn’t sort.’

Nancy didn’t need to ask why. She’d heard Doris’s youngest crying through the walls in the early hours.

‘Georgie?’ Nancy asked, and Doris nodded. ‘He’ll settle soon enough,’ Nancy said reassuringly, but if the truth be known, she had no idea if her well-meant words would come true or not. Little George, as he was also known, hadn’t slept through a single night since his dad – ‘Big George’, Doris’s husband – had been tragically killed at Vickers, the local steelworks. And by the look of it – neither had Doris. The heavy bags under her eyes grew darker by the day and her frail frame seemed to be visibly shrinking.

‘Are you sure you’re managing?’ Nancy asked kindly. ‘Why don’t you let me have the kids over for tea and you can catch forty winks.’

‘Oh, it’s okay, luv,’ came the reply. ‘They’re still all pretty needy.’

Nancy nodded. It had only been three months since Big George had died in the most tragic and unspeakable of manners. His neck scarf had got caught in one of the monstrous lathes; his workmates had tried to shut down the machine but couldn’t stop the thick unforgiving belts quick enough. ‘Decapitation caused by severe laceration of the neck,’ the death certificate had read. No wonder Doris couldn’t sleep; Nancy knew her mind must have filled with unbearable harrowing images as soon as she closed her eyes. There couldn’t be a crueller way to die and now Doris was left with four children, all under the age of ten, to feed, clothe and care for. How she had time to scrub her doorstep, as well as take in washing, sewing and do the odd cleaning job for the neighbours, was beyond Nancy.

She knew there was no point telling her friend to take it steady. How could she? Doris had bills to pay like everyone else and, with no husband to bring home a wage, she was juggling every ha’penny she had in a desperate bid to keep the tallyman at bay.

Doris didn’t need to be told twice that if she didn’t meet the rent, the debt collector would appear at the door and wouldn’t think twice about taking away any possessions she had to cover the money she owed.

Nancy knew that Doris had already pawned most of the jewellery Big George had bought her over the years, including the intricate locket he’d given her on their wedding day, eleven years earlier – a family heirloom that had been passed down through the generations that had been a wrench to part with – but that she refused to let the gold band on her wedding finger go.

‘Listen. Don’t you be worrying about me,’ Doris said, snapping Nancy out of her daydream. She didn’t know how, but she was determined to find a way through the heart-wrenching predicament she had found herself in. She had no choice – she had four kids who were relying on her.

‘Well, at least come and have that cuppa when we’ve finished cleaning later,’ Nancy said. ‘Bert said he’d be working late and I’ve got some leftover jam pudding from last night – the kids can share it between them after school.’

Doris smiled. ‘Thanks, luv; that will cheer them up.’

It was the very least Nancy could do. She couldn’t imagine what life would be like without Bert to bring home a steady wage from his job as a tram driver – his steadfast love and support was all Nancy had ever known.

The rest of the day passed in the blink of an eye. After her doorstep almost glimmered in the bright sunshine, Nancy black-leaded the range, cleaned the windows with the previous week’s collection of newspapers and a good douse of malt vinegar, before getting through the pile of washing that had mounted up. By the time three o’clock came, she’d done her jobs and was happy to put bucket and cloths away just in time to go and collect Billy and Linda from the school gates, before preparing a few extra carrots and potatoes to go with the leftover slices of beef from the day before’s Sunday roast.

She’s only been back a few minutes when, right on cue, as she boiled a fresh pan of water on the kitchen range, Nancy heard the giggles and chatter of Little George, Alice, Joe and their eldest sister, Katherine, come tumbling through the yard, with their exhausted mum.

‘Perfect timing,’ Nancy said, fetching a jug of creamy milk from the parlour and setting out her two best china cups and saucers. ‘Put your feet up and have a minute,’ she said, with a smile, scooping a generous spoonful of tea leaves from the old tin caddy into her trusty teapot.

‘And look what I’ve got for you lot.’ Nancy showed Doris’s children, cutting the remainder of the jam sponge into squares. There was just enough for each of them, with a slightly smaller piece each for Billy and Linda. ‘Now, tuck in and let your mum have a well-deserved break,’ she said, knowing her neighbour’s children probably hadn’t had a sweet treat in weeks.

Apart from Little George, who clung to his mum like a limpet, the others all happily ran back into the yard with a trail of crumbs following them.

‘Thanks, Nancy, you’re a good friend,’ Doris sighed, grateful for ten minutes to sit down without fending off one request after another from six-year-old Alice, Joe, seven, and Katherine, nine.

‘Don’t be daft,’ Nancy protested, ‘you would do the same for me.’ The two women had been neighbours since she and Bert had moved in the week after they had got married, eight years earlier. Slightly older, and wiser, Doris had immediately taken Nancy under her wing, something the younger woman was grateful for. Nancy’s parents lived forty miles away in their home city of Manchester, not far from her elder sister, Lucy, and her husband, Jack. Nancy desperately missed Lucy; they had been so close growing up and she wished they lived nearer so she could chat to her about everyday life and any worries she had. But when Nancy moved into the neat three-bedroom terrace at 23 Prince Street, Doris had naturally slotted into the protective big sister role.

When Billy, and two years later Linda, had come along, it had been Doris who had held her hand through the painful contractions, mopping her forehead with a cool damp towel, calmly reassuring her and expertly telling Nancy when to push. And once her precious babies entered the world, yet again it was Doris who showed Nancy the ropes, until her mum had arrived to offer a helping hand.

Inevitably a close friendship had formed between the two women and now Nancy knew it was her turn to offer Doris support.

‘Are you sure you’re managing?’ she asked tentatively.

‘I’ve been better,’ came the unsurprising reply, as Doris took a sip of her sugary sweet tea. ‘The bills are mounting up,’ she said, letting out an exhausted sigh. ‘I’m robbing Peter to pay Paul and the kids are pulling me in all directions. It’s not their fault. They are good really, but obviously need me more than ever. Alice asks at least ten times a day when George is coming home, Georgie isn’t sleeping, Joe doesn’t understand why he no longer has a daddy and poor Katherine is trying to be brave but every night sobs into her pillow until she has no tears left.’

Nancy took a deep breath and firmly pressed down on her bottom lip, desperately trying to fight the tears that were now stinging the back of her eyes and threatening to burst down her cheek. The thought of the heartache Doris and her children were suffering was unbearable, but the last thing her friend needed was to see her turn into a blubbering mess. Nancy tried to find the right words to ease Doris’s pain, something that would give her a tiny glimmer of hope and reassure her things would get better. But each time Nancy went to open her mouth, she found herself completely at a loss as to what to say. The thought of Billy or Linda going through the same indescribable horror stopped Nancy in her tracks – no child should endure that sort of anguish, especially at such a tender age. It was hard enough for an adult to come to terms with such a gaping loss, let alone little ones, who were far too young and innocent to make any sense of how cruel life could be.

‘I know I can’t bring George back,’ Nancy started, ‘or take away what you must be feeling right now, but I’ll always be here for you.’ She gently took hold of Doris’s tiny shaking hand. ‘If there is anything you need, or anything I can do – whatever if it is, I’ll do my best. Maybe I can have the children of an evening if you want to take on a couple of extra cleaning jobs?’ Not that Nancy liked the idea of Doris working all the hours God sent but she knew, now more than ever, it had become an evil necessity if she wanted to keep the wolves from the door.

‘Thanks, Nancy, luv.’ Doris murmured weakly, slowly stroking Little George’s back, who had finally nodded off on her chest. ‘You’re a good friend. I might have to take you up on that if you’re really sure.’

Relieved there was some practical way she could finally help her neighbour, who was more like a sister, Nancy smiled. ‘Of course, I’ll even make an extra jam sponge. That will keep the kids happy.’ She hoped Doris would feel a little safer in the knowledge that she could rely on her whenever she needed to. After all, wasn’t that what friends were for?

Long after Doris had taken the children home, and she’d tucked Billy and Linda into bed with a kiss and a bedtime story, Nancy couldn’t stop thinking about her pal. She had filled the hole Nancy’s sister, Lucy, had left behind when she’d moved away and now the thought of her suffering in the most agonizing of manners was just heartbreaking.

As she put the last of the dinner dishes away and settled down for her last cuppa of the day, the kitchen door swung open.

‘Oh, hiya luv.’ Nancy beamed at the sight of her husband, Bert, instantly jumping up to fetch his dinner from the range. ‘Long day?’

‘Aye,’ he said with a sigh, leaning over to give his wife a peck on the cheek. ‘Offering to pull a double shift wasn’t my brightest idea. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve driven back and forth to the city centre today.’

Nancy smiled. Bert had always been a hard worker and whenever his manager offered him an extra shift as a tram driver, he never turned it down, grateful for the extra cash he would receive in his wage packet on Friday.

‘It all helps pay the bills,’ she said, carefully placing Bert’s warmed-up beef dinner in front of him. Grabbing a mug for her husband and a cup and saucer for herself, she poured them each a strong brew.

‘You look distracted tonight, luv. What is it?’ Bert asked in between mouthfuls of mashed potatoes.

Holding her china cup to her mouth, the one small luxury Nancy allowed herself, she told Bert about her chat with Doris. ‘I just wish I could make it all better for her. Apart from grieving for George, she’s worrying herself sick about paying the bills. The little ones are struggling too. How on earth do you explain to them that Daddy has gone to heaven?’

Bert looked up from his now nearly empty plate. He knew how much his wife thought of Doris. ‘I’ll be earning an extra bob or two this week with all this overtime. Why don’t you nip to the butcher’s on Saturday and get an extra big joint and invite them all round for tea?’

Nancy reached across the table and squeezed her husband’s arm, feeling reminded as to why she’d married him. ‘That’s a lovely idea,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’

‘Ah, it’s nothing in the grand scheme of things,’ Bert replied, swallowing his last forkful of beef. ‘It will do her good and I know how much you love seeing all the kids play together.’

He was right. Nancy had always dreamt of having a houseful of children running around, getting up to mischief, but after Linda had come along, she and Bert had agreed two was enough. They had just enough money to live comfortably without worrying where the next meal was coming from and, despite always secretly craving holding another new-born baby for the very first time, Nancy felt lucky she had been blessed with a boy and girl.

‘Besides which,’ Bert added, ‘I think we are all going to have to stick together more than ever soon enough.’

‘What do you mean, luv?’ Nancy asked, although deep down she, like the rest of the country, had felt a sense of uncertainty for months now. ‘Do you really think it will happen?’ she added before Bert had a chance to reply.

‘Aye, I do,’ he answered, almost too quickly for Nancy’s liking.

She pulled her arms across her body as a cold shiver ran through her. An impending war had been the elephant in the room in the Edwards’ house all summer. Bert rarely spoke about the latest developments across Europe, knowing his wife, an eternal worrier, couldn’t bear to think about it. Nancy always avoided any conversation around Hitler and his power-hungry actions, all too aware Bert would be one of the first to offer his services to fight the German’s terrifying regime, always wanting to do the right thing. But with the rest of her family so far away, the idea of Bert disappearing as well was one worry too many for Nancy. She would have loved to have been more like Doris, who had endless strength and determination to carry on despite how hard life was and the trauma she had faced.

I couldn’t be that strong, Nancy quietly thought to herself. I know I would crumble.

That night, after Bert had taken himself off to bed earlier than usual in preparation for another early start on the trams, Nancy sat alone at the kitchen table, contemplating her thoughts.

In the darkness – pitch black save for the glimmer of a candle, due to the newly installed thick black fabric she and Bert had fitted to every window to act as blackout blinds to comply with the new regulations – Nancy nursed the last dregs of her lukewarm tea, unable to stop her mind from wandering. Poor Doris had already lost her husband and Nancy could see the devastating effect it was having on her; the last thing she now wanted was to say goodbye to Bert as he left to fight in a strange unknown country, hundreds of miles away, not knowing if she, or their precious children, who adored their daddy more than life itself, would ever see him again.

The thought of him never coming back was too much to bear.

How could I ever tell Billy and Linda their daddy had died? Nancy silently worried, scrunching her eyes closed, just the thought of it was too much to even contemplate out loud.

Bert had also been the breadwinner since their children had come along and seeing how much Doris was now struggling left her terrified.

If the unthinkable happened, she really had no idea how on earth she would manage to put food on the table and keep a roof over their heads.