Читать книгу A Bride, A Barn, And A Baby - Nancy Thompson Robards - Страница 10

Chapter Three

Even if Zane hadn’t readily admitted it to himself, on some subconscious level he’d known from the moment he’d picked up the call from Lucy that she was upset. He’d known by the tone of her voice that something was off, but she said she was simply having one of those days and didn’t want to talk about it over the phone. She’d insisted that she was fine, but she needed to talk to him today and asked him if she could come over. He should’ve told her about the interview and asked if it could wait until he got back, but he didn’t. Instead, he’d told her to come over.

She’d promised she wouldn’t stay long. He certainly wasn’t bringing out any bourbon and he wouldn’t let himself be seduced by kung pao beef.

He used the word seduced lightly, though. It wasn’t as if he was blameless when it came to their night together. He’d been weak, and he’d given in to his basest urges. He was perfectly willing to take full responsibility for what had happened between them. And along with that, he was fully prepared to make sure it never happened again. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Lucy, or toy with her emotions. Even though he hadn’t been cognizant of that the night of the bourbon, he was well aware now and it wouldn’t happen again.

He knew he couldn’t change the past and beating himself up over things he couldn’t change was pointless. However, he could help them move forward.

In the past, if Lucy had called saying she needed to talk, he’d always made time. Now was no different.

And when he heard her arrive, he thought he was being authentic to their friendship when he answered the door, got a good look at Lucy and said, “You look like hell.”

He instantly regretted it when she glowered at him.

“Gee, thanks.”

“I mean, you’re always beautiful,” he countered. “You just don’t look like yourself. Are you okay?”

She made a sound that was somewhere between a squeak and a harrumph. When she didn’t come back with one of her usual quick-witted responses, he knew something wasn’t right. Then again, telling a woman, whether she was a friend or lover—or both—that she looked like hell was a boneheaded thing to do. He never had been good with words. He should just shut up before he dug himself in deeper.

“Come in. It’s hot out there.” He stepped back and held open the door, letting her pass into the living room.

They hadn’t been alone like this in weeks—since that night. It hadn’t been a conscious decision not to be alone together, at least not something they’d discussed. It was as if they’d mutually decided to stay in safe territory.

They’d seen each other in the company of others and had gone on as if nothing had changed. And it hadn’t...had it? Or had he been so damn determined to make things normal again that he hadn’t let himself see it any other way?

As Lucy stepped inside and he closed the door behind her, memories of the last time they’d been alone flooded back and his body responded.

He was leaving within the half hour. His bags were packed and waiting by the door. He could exercise enough self-control to be alone with her. But judging from the look on her face, that wasn’t going to be a problem. Though she’d said she was fine when she’d called and asked if she could come over and talk to him, it was clear as the summer sky now that something was very wrong.

“Are you going somewhere?” Her face had softened to a look of concern, but the characteristic sparkle was still absent from her brown eyes.

“I am.” It was all he could manage to say before a look of dawning replaced her look of apprehension.

“Did you get the Ocala job?”

He shook his head.

“It’s just an interview.”

Over the past six weeks, he’d had several interviews at various ranches in the South—he’d even had a couple of offers that he’d turned down because they weren’t exactly right. There was always something amiss—either the salary had been less than what he was making now or some aspect of the job wasn’t right. Actually, he’d been holding out for the job at Hidden Rock in Ocala, Florida. It was the real deal. The one he’d been waiting for. A chance to work with champion horses; potential for great salary; opportunity to do the kind of work he’d been itching to do. While he’d mentioned the Ocala prospect to Lucy in passing—that the ranch was looking for a general manager—he hadn’t told her that he’d finally gotten a call for an interview. The stakes seemed so high and he was enough of a realist to know he shouldn’t get his hopes up. It was a coveted position. He hadn’t wanted to say anything to anyone, especially not to Lucy, until he had something more substantial to report.

A first-round interview, especially since it had taken them nearly two months to respond to his résumé, was not substantial.

But in typical Lucy fashion, she seemed to zero in on what he wasn’t saying as if she was reading his mind. The thought was simultaneously comforting and unnerving, since everywhere he looked in his small living room, he saw reminders of the night that they had made love.

The window across the room, where it had all started. The couch that was right in front of them, where they had made love the first time. The hallway to his right, where they had somehow managed to walk while staying tangled up in each other on their way to the bedroom, where they had spent the rest of the night.

Reflexively his gaze fell to Lucy’s lips and his groin tightened as he remembered how sweet she had tasted and how it had felt to explore her body.

No. He wasn’t going to fall down that rabbit hole again, despite the way he was dying to reach out and pull her into his arms. It wasn’t because things between them hadn’t been good. Hell, they’d been great. Off-the-effing-charts great. And he had spent the past six weeks cursing himself for being so weak that night. He hadn’t been himself. He had been out of sorts and overwhelmed by the magnitude of everything that was happening around him that he’d taken comfort in her when she’d told him she wanted him.

It wasn’t an excuse, but it was a reminder that Lucy Campbell was his kryptonite.

That was why he needed to have a will of steel when he was with her.

He did not want to hurt her and he knew damn good and well that was what would happen if he lost control again. She deserved better than he could offer. Besides, if he got the job in Ocala, he would be moving. He wasn’t about to try a long-distance romance. She deserved someone who had his life together, someone who could take care of her the way she deserved to be cared for. As far as he was concerned, Lucy was a princess and he was about the furthest thing from a prince anyone could imagine.

The truth sobered him.

Plus, given the mood she was in, she would probably slap the crap out of him if he did try to touch her again, and he would deserve it.

Yeah, it was a good thing that the car that Hidden Rock had hired to take him to the airport would be here any minute. He glanced at his watch to remind himself of that.

“Why didn’t you tell me about the interview?” Lucy demanded, sounding more like herself.

He shrugged. “It’s just a first-round thing. I’ll be back the day after tomorrow. You wouldn’t even have missed me in that short time span. In fact, you wouldn’t even have noticed I was gone.”

She frowned again and said in a small voice, “I would’ve noticed.”

Of course she would have. If anybody in this town would’ve noticed he was gone, it would’ve been Lucy. And that was the perfect example of just how deeply in denial he’d been since he’d done the morning-after, let’s-be-friends walk back, when he’d tried to explain it wasn’t that he didn’t want her. His life was a hot mess right now and the uphill climb he was facing to get himself back on track required all of his focus. There were the job interviews, plus his itch to get out of Celebration and start over. All of that added up to the fact that she just deserved so much more than he could offer her right now.

Things were starting to happen for Lucy. She was having success with the wedding barn. The last thing she needed was dead weight to drag her away from what was important in her life.

“Depending on how things went,” he said, “you were going to be the first person I told when I got back.”

Her mouth tilted up into a Mona Lisa smile and she looked sad for a split second. But then she lifted her chin and gave her head a quick shake. Again, the Lucy he knew and adored came shining through.

“So, tell me what they said,” she demanded.

“They haven’t said anything yet. That’s why I’m going. To get the scoop. We’re going to talk about all the details when I’m there.”

She rolled her eyes, clearly exasperated with his reluctance to share what he knew. “Well, surely they gave you some indication of what the job entails. Didn’t they? I mean, if not, you could be walking into a situation where they are looking for someone to muck out the stables. It would be a shame to go all that way only to find out you’re highly overqualified.”

“I’ll take my chances,” he said. “Especially since I’m certain mucking out stables isn’t part of the general manager’s job description.”

“What? Are you too good to muck out stables?” She smiled.

“Of course not. I have vast experience with that. So, let’s just say I’ve already paid my dues.”

They were quiet for a moment, looking at each other, and for a few seconds it felt as if nothing had changed between them.

“So, this is the one, isn’t it?” she asked. “The job you really want.”

It was. At least he thought so, but he hated to say too much, because it was a long shot. Anyone who was anyone in the equestrian industry wanted this job.

But who was he kidding? Lucy knew him well enough that if he said no, she would see right through him to the truth.

“Yeah,” he said. “I’d love this job.”

She drew in a deep breath and nodded. “Well, good. Since you’d been turning down offers left and right, I was beginning to worry that you were being too picky.” She shrugged. “Or that you had finally decided you didn’t want to leave me after all. Hey, how are you getting to the airport?”

“They’ve hired a car to transport me to and from Dallas,” he said. “But thanks for offering.”

“Who said I was offering?” Her smile was a little bit too bright and the dullness that had stolen the shine from her eyes didn’t match it.

He wanted to ask if they were okay. Instead, he said, “If they weren’t transporting me, I would’ve asked you to take me.”

“Yeah, well, good thing, then,” she quipped, her smile still in place. “I would’ve probably been busy.”

The sound of the air-conditioning kicking on filled the vortex of weirdness swirling between them. Okay, so he’d screwed up by sleeping with her. This was too complicated. He could tell she didn’t believe him when he said he cared too much about her for it to happen again. But he didn’t want to hurt her, and if things were this weird after only one time, it was bound to only get more difficult if they did it again.

“What brings you all the way over here?” he asked. “Surely you didn’t come here just to see me off.”

“Sorry, Charlie. Given the fact that I didn’t know you were going anywhere, that’s not why I came over. But since you are leaving, it can wait.”

“That sounds ominous,” he said. “The car’s not here yet, so what’s on your mind?”

She bit her bottom lip and looked at him as if she was forming her words, then she shook her head. “No, it can wait until you get back. We don’t have enough time to get into it.”

“Get into it? Are you mad at me? Is this about what happened? Because, Lucy, I really do care about you. I’m so mad at myself. I don’t want you to feel like I took advantage of you—”

“No, Zane. Stop. It’s not about that—”

“You are perfectly within your rights to be mad at me. And that’s okay. You can punch me if you want to. You can be mad at me for as long as you need to. But I hope it won’t be too long because what’s not okay is for us not to be okay—”

The sound of a honking horn cut him off.

“Your car is here. You need to go.”

Dammit.

“I don’t want to leave you like this. Will you please just talk to me for a moment? Tell me what’s on your mind.”

She had that look on her face again. The look that made him uncertain whether she was upset or maybe she really wasn’t feeling well. Only this time, she put her hand up to her mouth as she closed her eyes and drew in a deep breath. She really did look like she was going to be sick.

“Lucy? Are you okay?”

“I—I’m sorry. I’ll be right back.”

She dashed off down the hall. He saw her close the bathroom door behind her, heard her turn on the water.

For a moment he wasn’t sure what to do. He wondered if he should ask her if she needed anything. But suddenly he had a sickening realization of what she’d wanted to talk to him about. He understood perfectly.

He stood there for a moment, seeing stars and cursing under his breath as reality sank in.

Someone knocked on his front door. Zane answered, knowing it would be the driver. He steeled himself before speaking. It wasn’t the driver’s fault that this day had become a huge cluster of bad timing.

“Hey, man, sorry to keep you waiting,” Zane said, to the guy. “I’ll be out in a minute. Just as soon as I take care of something.”

“Not a problem,” the driver said. “I just wanted to make sure you knew I was here. The name’s Raymond. May I carry your bags out to the car?”

Zane cast a quick glance over his shoulder to see if Lucy had emerged from the bathroom yet. Then his gaze fell to the time, which was displayed in glowing green numbers on the front of his DVR. It was already after four o’clock. His plane was supposed to take off at just before seven o’clock and he still had a half-hour ride to the airport.

“Thanks, but no. I’ll bring them when I come out.”

A moment after Raymond left, Lucy emerged from the bathroom, clutching a wad of toilet paper. Tears trailed down her cheeks and she shudder-sobbed when she looked at Zane.

He finally gathered his senses enough to go to her and put an arm around her and walk her to the sofa.

“Lucy, did you come over here to tell me you’re pregnant?”

* * *

“The bride wants to drape every single wall in the barn in gossamer tulle,” said Juliette Lowell. “From floor to ceiling. The ceilings are so high. I don’t know if that’s even possible. Is it?”

Juliette was Lucy’s friend and neighbor. Her family had owned the property to the south of the Campbell ranch for generations. Now she was the owner of a wedding-planning business called Weddings by Juliette and was sending a lot of brides and grooms to the Campbell Wedding Barn.

Lucy shrugged. “We haven’t tried anything like that before, but I suppose anything is possible.”

By the grace of God, she managed not to snort. Because, yeah, after the turn of events in her life, anything could happen. Proof of that was that she was pregnant with Zane Phillips’s baby. So, yeah, anything was possible. Well, maybe not anything. Not the good things—not that this baby wasn’t good. She just hadn’t had a chance to wrap her mind around it yet. And she had to do that and find out if Zane had gotten the job in Ocala before she could find the good in anything these days.

After Zane guessed her news, he hadn’t exactly fallen to one knee and professed his undying love. Not that she’d expected that. Well, okay, she wouldn’t lie. It would’ve been nice if he’d declared that his eyes had been suddenly opened and he realized he couldn’t live without her. But he hadn’t. Zane had reacted like a man in shock, and then he had gone to Ocala to interview for his dream job.

In all fairness, he’d offered to skip the trip. She’d insisted he go. Basically, she’d pushed him into the hired car that had been waiting to take him to the airport. And how about that—a hired car. As if paying for overnight parking wasn’t more than adequate, Hidden Rock Equestrian had actually sent a car and driver. This ranch was no rinky-dink outfit. No wonder Zane wanted the job so badly.

A wave of nausea crested. She inhaled and rode out the feeling. She wasn’t sure if it was caused by the pregnancy or the reality that Zane might really be leaving. But she couldn’t think about that now because Juliette was saying something to her.

“What?” Lucy asked, feeling dazed.

Juliette was staring up at the apex of the pitched ceiling.

“I asked you what the ceiling measures at its highest point.”

Lucy followed Juliette’s upward gaze. “Oh. Umm... I have no idea. I mean, I could take a guess, but I don’t know exactly.”

It was a long way up, that was for sure. Tall enough to accommodate a second story, which was planned in another phase of the renovations Lucy would do to the place once she had generated enough capital. She’d already implemented phase one, which turned the formerly ramshackle barn into a place suitable for fairy-tale weddings. It had cost a lot of money to make a place hospitable while keeping the rustic integrity that was so popular with brides these days. She was taking the renovations slowly, keeping an eye on her margin so that she didn’t get in over her head. With the way things were going, the steady stream of bookings would allow her to pay cash for the next phase of renovations sooner rather than later.

But now that she was pregnant, she might have to rethink things. She might have to use some of the money she was allocating for renovations for hiring extra help.

She was pregnant.

The reality kept washing over her in waves. Each time it hit, the force of it threatened to knock her down.

Juliette was frowning at her. “Are you okay?”

Again, Lucy wanted to snort. Because she was so far from okay right now she didn’t even know where she stood. But the only thing she could do was say she was fine, because she and Zane hadn’t had a chance to discuss matters fully. There was no way she could confide in anyone else about it right now. Not that she didn’t trust Juliette. In fact, Juliette was one of the most trustworthy people she’d ever met.

But talking to anyone about it before she and Zane came up with a plan just wouldn’t be right.

“I’m fine.”

“You just don’t seem as if you’re all here today.”

Oh, she was all here—plus some. Literally.

Since none of life’s usual rules seemed to apply anymore, they might as well try something they’d never attempted before and cover the barn’s walls in shimmery gossamer. At least it would be pretty.

“Is your client supplying the tulle or are we?” Lucy asked.

“I’ll have to confirm with her,” said Juliette. “But judging from how hands-off this bride has been, I’d wager that she’ll want us to provide it. That’s been her MO so far. She wants a miracle and expects us to make it happen. You know, no biggie.”

Juliette laughed and Lucy forced herself to laugh right along with her.

Lucy could’ve used a couple of miracles herself.

Zane had nearly missed his plane to Florida because after he had guessed what was going on—that she was pregnant—he had insisted he couldn’t leave her. That was why she hadn’t wanted to tell him after she saw his bags sitting by the door and learned that he had gotten the interview. The only way she had been able to convince him to go was by pointing out that nothing would change while he was gone, she would still be pregnant when he returned and they would talk about it then.

Reluctantly, he’d gotten in the car, and he’d texted her an hour later to let her know he was at the gate and his plane was boarding. At least he hadn’t missed it. But Lucy would’ve been lying if she said she wasn’t a little worried about this job interview. This was the big one. Nothing had fit until now, and at the rate he’d been refusing offers, she was beginning to hope that maybe he really didn’t want to leave. But just looking at his face as he told her about the Hidden Rock job, she knew this one was different.