Читать книгу Islanders - Наталья Андреева - Страница 3

The pause was long. Ivan kept silent. Аngelica smoked with pleasure, Vera persistently looked in an ashtray which was on the armrest of her armchair, Seva looked at Sergey, Arthur – in window… Then people in armchairs began to exchange glances.

“Well, be brave.” Ivan said. “I remind you: everything that happens here won't be open for public. The newcomer?”

“I don't want to be the first.” Angelica protested.

“I see: you should look around. Who wishes to tell us about the problems? I shall open you my small secret: I have got an interesting solution. With it I shall help you to get rid of the fears. In the next room, behind the door which is at my back, there is a surprise.

“What surprise?” Lida asked curiously. “We did not agree!”

“Do not worry.” Ivan smiled. “It is not painful. Sessions of psychotherapy are absolutely not painful. It’s better to say they are pleasant. About money we are not going to speak now but I am sure time comes. And time is paid by you. So …”

“I am ready to speak.” and Sergey stopped to smoke.

Lida and Vera looked at him with surprise. Sergey had caught these sights and said.

“I know it surprises you. I seemed shy. Well …I had just listened. But sooner or later there comes the moment when you are ready. Now I am ready to speak.”

“Nobody objects.” Seva muttered.

“So, Sergey wants to speak.” Ivan looked around. “Please. We listen to you attentively.”

Sergey nervously took one more cigarette from the pack and began to smoke. Lida was not glad about it but kept silent. After a little pause Sergey at last said.

“How to begin? That is the question. As a rule it is better from the beginning. Excuse me, I am nervous. I repeat. Everything around … weather, yes. Today the weather is disgusting.”

That was a long pause.

“Yes, March in this year is surprisingly cold.” Vera supported him.

“It seems that the spring will never come.” Lida added quietly. All men and Zhanna were silent. Аngelica smoked.

“Weather is disgusting.” Sergey summed up. “So, we have talked about the weather, what else? I cannot concentrate. Excuse me, I must be more talkative. Let’s begin. I was born forty two years ago in the city of Moscow, in the street … Yes, I remember the rules…This street is in the City centre. My mum … I think that won't be any secret if I shall tell you that my mum has worked all her life as the teacher at school without specification of a subject which she taught. We lived in a municipal apartment. To be sure, in a two-roomed apartment. One room was bigger and the kitchen was neither large nor small. Two tables and two cupboards and a stove were there. The relatives bought the refrigerator for the kitchen. It was so long ago. That was my childhood. We with mum lived in the big room and in the small one lived the aunt … Without names, I remember.”

He continued to smoke. Ivan didn’t say anything but his sight became suddenly so sharp as if he wanted to pin Sergey to a back of an armchair. Meanwhile Sergey continued.

“As for the metric area, it's okay. We did not apply for expansion. Our room was very big. Why are you looking at me? Yes, there are such big rooms in the center in the old apartments. Of course, we with mum would like to live in a separate apartment. But I forgot to say the aunt was ten years elder than my mum and she had a diabetes. It is a shame to speak about it but we thought she would die earlier than … in general you have understood me. And such apartment in the center you know how much it costs. Mum who was born in an old city doesn't want to move.

And the aunt … the aunt was ill, never married, had neither the husband nor children. The lonely, sick woman… We signed the contract about trusteeship. Without any details, such contract as we look after her and her room after her death comes to us. It is disgusting!” he said suddenly. “It is disgusting to be interested in someone's death! This woman became to me a close relative! Mum worked all day long earning money alone and it was hard. She wanted to give me a good education. But the aunt … While mum went on private lessons, the aunt warmed up meal for me, met me from school and then from the institute, mended my socks, ironed shirts. And after that I wished her death! It is disgusting!” he repeated again and got one more cigarette from the pack.

“But that's not your fault.” Lida said suddenly.” That's life which puts us in … such …” and she hushed up “circumstances.”

“Yes, but we should stay people under any circumstances.” Sergey answered smoking. “Excuse me, I am nervous.” and then he added. “She died one day after mum.”

“Who died? “ Arthur didn't understand him.

“The aunt who had diabetes died one day after the woman who considered herself absolutely healthy and did not go to doctors up to the last moment. I mean my mum. When at last she visited the doctors it was already late. "We couldn’t do anything." doctors told her. Last two years of my life were awful. I had already understood that it was necessary to earn money and to buy at last a separate apartment not waiting while the small room of the aunt will be ours. I had understood it.And I started to work. I earned money. I bought a car. At first one, then another, more expensive, then …” he stopped for a moment. “When I had money, both of them were sick. They were so ill that I ask somebody to stay with them. There were people near them all the time: nurses, doctors,friends. The aunt was very sociable. The old women from the next houses came to her. I tried to spend at home less time. Left early came late. Justified myself that I was earning money.”

“And why didn't you move?” Seva asked. “They had got nurses, hadn't they?”

“Feeling of a duty. I was brought up that way. I could not leave them. They wanted me to stay and though it had not been said aloud I understood it in their eyes. Both of them wanted me to prolong their lives, do you understand? I was always near and it seemed to them as soon as I disappear it will be the end. I was close up to the end. The funeral was the same day. After that I felt loneliness. I hated the old people and all their illnesses. I could not communicate with them. And … I had sold that apartment in the Center. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, of course.” Vera answered.

“And you?” Sergey looked at Lida then at Arthur sitting to the right. Lida was silent as usual. Arthur bent lips trying to smile.

“Why are you so sad, Sergey?” Ivan asked.

“Sad?” Sergey smoked a cigarette. “I don’t know such a feeling that I am the old man myself. For these forty years in that apartment close to a sick woman I felt old myself. It is a shame but when they died I didn't feel grief. I didn't want to cry. I felt nothing. The soul was empty. I wanted to stay alone.”

He stopped speaking. The others were silent too. Nobody was going to interrupt him and Sergey continued.

“Well, I want to tell you more about my private life.”

“Are you sure? It is not necessary.” Lida said.

“Why? It is interesting! Or maybe you thought that I had no private life at all? Well, of course, I had! When I was twenty six,” Sergey began to remember. “I met the girl who was younger than me … Five years younger. Yes, only five. I had met girls at the institute and … However, unimportant. But that was the special one whom I wanted to marry. The problem was she had no separate apartments. She lived with parents in a very small apartment. We fell in love and began to date. We loved each other …”

With these words Angelica began to giggle.

“Is it funny? By the way, it was not funny at all. We met waiting while her parents left or my mum went away but behind a wall there was a sick woman who knew everything, more than everything. She was curious, very curious. When the baby was born.”

“What baby?” Vera asked with a surprise.

“Why is it so surprising? You don't know how the babies are born, do you?”

“I do but …”

“You don't think that I could have a baby? But I have a daughter.” Sergey was angry.

“She is almost an adult and very independent. Sure, we wanted to get married with her mother. But we could not live together. We tried. But I didn't feel comfortable in their apartment and it was far from my work. She lived in the suburbs. And I had to work a lot to earn money and to solve our problems. She could not live with me. We had no separate room and put a screen. That was fifteen years ago. Long fifteen years ago… I asked her to rent a separate apartment she refused.”

“Why?” Zhanna asked. “She could live there with … with the girl.”

“Women are strange.” Sergey smiled. “When I had nothing, she loved me. And when I became rich, she left me. We had never lived together. She said that for those years I had changed greatly. She spoke about the Robinson complex in me. “

“What complex?” Angelica was wondered.

“It’s loneliness. You don't need people around. I became strange. But I want to ask you if it was strange or not? Why did she refuse to live together?”

“Who thinks Sergey is strange?” Ivan asked.

“Absolutely not!“ Angelica said. “He is normal!”

“Thanks.” Sergey grinned.

“Do you want me to marry you?” she could not stop speaking.

“Thanks again. But I want my family.”

“Seva?” Ivan asked.

“I?” he was frightened. “ We are all very strange. I, for example, too …”

“We will speak about you later. Vera?”

“I didn't find anything strange. Don't find.”

“Arthur?”

“Is he strange?” Arthur wondered. “I think she is strange. The woman who as you said left you.”

“You are from the category of men who always accuse women of everything.” Lida attacked him. “As for me I don't want to comment the situation.”

“Well. Zhanna?” and Ivan looked at the pretty blonde.

“I am only twenty five. I am younger than all of you. I can't judge the feelings of people. But I think if she had stopped loving him that's right that why she left.”

“I did not say: she stopped loving me.” Sergey noticed. “I think not.”

“Life is so difficult.” Seva tried to express himself. “Today she leaves, tomorrow she will return.”

“But I would like to be sure!”

“I think, you do not tell us everything.” Ivan said. “What is it, Sergey? Is there anything else?”

“Probably.”

“It is important to know everything.”

“Well. I met the other woman.” Sergey said unwillingly.

“Aha!” Angelica threatened him by her finger. “Here we are! You got confused in your mistresses …sorry, women. That's it.”

“I didn't.” Sergey said angrily. “I am sure with whom I want to stay.”

“And with whom?” Vera asked very quiet.

“Let's stop speaking about the family problems.” Arthur stopped them. “We are lucky that Sergey has only two women. If I shall start to tell you about mine whom I want or don't want it will take me a week.”

“Oh! We would like to listen to you with pleasure!” Angelica began to clap her hands.

“I am not going to listen to it.” Lida was against. “Let's stop it.”

“Wow!” Angelica was wondered. “Are you a virgin?”

“I am not!“

“By the way…” Angelica looked at everybody in the room. “Have we got here virgins? I don't want to confuse them. Sometimes I am so shocking!”

“We are all truthful enough here.” Ivan responded to her.

“Well, thanks God!”

“But it does not mean it is necessary to be rude.” again very quietly but firmly said Lida.

“It's nine.” Ivan looked at the watch. “It's time for a surprise.”

“What surprise?” greedy asked Angelica.

“I found a way how to help you to overcome your own fears. Sergey said he had the Robinson's complex. Actually he likes people and he wants to communicate. Robinson many years lived on an island searching for a way to get out and finally he met Friday. Communication is important for Sergey as well as for the others to get rid of fears. So, cross the past and think about it as you will never return back. It is necessary to move further. The others will speak later. And now I shall bring something.”

“What is it?” Angelica asked impatiently.

“Wait a minute.”

Ivan got up and left the room. Angelica took from the pack one more cigarette.

“You are smoking too much, aren't you?” asked Lida.

“And what?”

“Nothing. But you don't think about people around. Men do not smoke so much as you! “

“As for the other people …” Angelica enjoyed smoking.” I think you are always right. But it’s boring. Have you got a husband?”

“That's not your business.”

“I think you aren't married. And that is your problem!”