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The telephone call which changed my life was not even made to me.

It was late in the afternoon of 21 August 2002, when ‘he’ called the BBC’s office at Ormeau Avenue in Belfast. He didn’t say his name—they never do—but left enough hints as to his background. His message was brief and to the point. As it was recounted to me, the call went something like this…

’This is the LVF. If Neil Lennon takes the field tonight he will get seriously hurt.’

LVF stands for Loyalist Volunteer Force, one of the more extreme terrorist groups in Northern Ireland at that time. They battled in their own way for what they perceived to be the Protestant and Unionist cause. I, on the other hand, was a Roman Catholic from Lurgan in County Armagh, and to them I was guilty of a terrible crime—I played for Glasgow Celtic, the club which, despite being non-sectarian since its foundation, is seen as a totem of Irish Catholic nationalism.

It didn’t matter to the caller that I had lived away from Northern Ireland for fourteen years. He didn’t know that my family was not associated in any way with political or sectarian groups. My three sisters and I had been brought up with ‘the Troubles’ all around, but hadn’t lost a relative. We were always lectured by our parents that we should avoid being caught up in the madness that had besmirched our country over four decades.

It only mattered to the caller that, for the first time, a Roman Catholic who also played for Celtic would captain Northern Ireland in Belfast that night. It was a ‘friendly’ match against Cyprus to prepare both sides for the forthcoming qualifying matches for the European Championships. There was nothing remotely friendly in what the caller said.

They say a week is a long time in politics. Well, let me tell you that two hours can be a lifetime in football, and eighteen months can seem an eternity. For the seeds of what happened that night in Belfast were laid on the evening of 28 February 2001, with an event that made headlines in newspapers in Britain, Ireland and further afield.

That was the first time I played for Northern Ireland after joining Celtic, in a friendly match against Norway at Windsor Park. Geography is vitally important in my country, so you should know that the crumbling old stadium is in the heart of East Belfast and is home to Linfield FC, a club traditionally supported by the Protestant and Unionist section of Northern Irish society who predominate in that area.

The events of that night didn’t come as a complete surprise to me. When I signed for Celtic a few months earlier I had known that it was highly probable that when I turned out for Northern Ireland I would get some stick and maybe a bit of hassle here and there. It had happened to Celtic players capped by Northern Ireland in the past, such as Anton Rogan and Allan McKnight. A captain of Celtic had actually led Northern Ireland in the past—the late Bertie Peacock, who played thirty-one times for his country and went on to manage the national side, in the fifties and sixties. But he was a Protestant in an era when there was rather more respect around.

I, on the other hand, was the antithesis of what some ‘fans’ stood for in a sectarian time. There had been warnings in various newspapers that my move to Celtic could earn me some serious grief when I played for Northern Ireland, so I wasn’t entirely taken aback, but nothing could have prepared me for the sheer scale of what happened before and during that match against Norway.

A few days before the game, my mother and father at home in Lurgan were appalled to learn from journalists that the words ‘Neil Lennon RIP’ had been scrawled on a wall in the town of Lisburn. Someone was saying that I was going to be a dead man.

It was a terrible shock to my family who are quiet-living and fundamentally decent Christian people. My father Gerry had not been well and was to suffer a heart attack in August 2001. He, my mother Ursula and the rest of my family were deeply upset by what some moron undoubtedly thought was a sick joke—or maybe in light of subsequent events, he or she meant it as a shot across my bows, a warning of worse to come. And indeed worse, much worse, did come my way as I joined my colleagues of different religions and none at all to play for my country against Norway.

From the moment I went onto that pitch to play in the green and white colours of Northern Ireland I was the target of an unremitting chorus of boos, jeers, catcalls and insults. In a half-empty stadium, the noise seemed to amplify and at times it seemed as though it was the only sound to be heard.

I had anticipated the odd jibe from individuals in the crowd or on the streets, but nothing prepared me for the extent of the hatred I faced. Deep down, it was the sheer scale of things which upset me.

Prior to the game, the graffiti incident became known and there were some rumours about threats to me. The Irish FA and manager Sammy McIlroy appealed for me to be supported, but perhaps that backfired. I myself had spoken of the support and letters of encouragement I had received, but inside I had a justifiable dread of what might happen at Windsor Park. Later, people would try to play down what happened, saying that it was only a minority in the crowd who had hurled abuse. There wasn’t a massive crowd at the game, maybe 7,000 or so, and the minority might only have been 500 or 600, but to me the proportion booing me didn’t matter—one per cent would have been too much for me.

On the pitch I was only too aware of what was happening off it. Not only could I hear the booing and jeering, but I could also see people in the stands arguing and gesticulating at each other amidst the home support. I could see and hear sections of the Northern Ireland crowd having a go at their fellow supporters who were abusing me—I use the word abuse because that is what such conduct is—and after a while I could clearly see that nobody was paying much attention to proceedings on the pitch.

The focus was no longer on the team as we battled to contain a slick Norway side. Instead the crowd’s concentration—and mine too—was almost totally on events off the pitch. And all too obviously, those events were connected to my part in the game. Every time I went near the ball there would be a chorus of boos and jeers, and then a spattering of cheers from fans who were clearly disgusted at what was happening to me.

Now I have been booed and jeered many times—just about every time I play for Celtic away from home in Scotland, and yes, I’ll have more to say about that later in this book. I had heard anti-Catholic songs being sung at Windsor Park internationals before but like most Catholic players, played on and ignored them.

This was substantially different, however. The fact is you do not mind being booed by the opposition fans or even your own supporters if you are having a stinker. But this was something else again and was, I believe, completely premeditated by a part of a hard core of the support which could not stomach seeing a Catholic Celtic player turning out for ‘their’ country. I say it was premeditated and planned because it started with my very first kick of the ball, it emanated from particular groups within the crowd and continued all the way to half-time without letting up. Also, I had played thirty-five times for my country before that night and had a good relationship with most fans who knew I gave my all for Northern Ireland. So what had happened to make things so different? Answer: I now played for Celtic.

It was a totally surreal atmosphere inside Windsor Park that night. God only knows what the small number of Norwegian supporters made of it all. Ole Gunnar Solskjaer of Manchester United was playing for them that night. He was interviewed afterwards and was quite bewildered. He had no idea what it was all about and just couldn’t understand why one of Northern Ireland’s own players was being booed every time he touched the ball.

Whether the clubs can do anything about it or not, Celtic and Rangers have become identified with the two sides of the sectarian divide in Northern Ireland. Here was I, in my thirty-sixth appearance for my country, never having been singled out before, being roundly abused simply because I was now a Celtic player. In the small minds of some people that fact was sufficient to make me an enemy, someone they could single out for sectarian abuse.

As I have said, I was aware that joining Celtic might give me problems of this nature. Indeed, I had spoken at length on the subject to my mentor and manager, Martin O’Neill, while we had been discussing my move from Leicester City to Celtic—and who better to talk things over with? He had been thefirst Catholic to captain Northern Ireland and had been proud to play for and lead his national side. We both knew that anyone signing for Celtic, or indeed Rangers, automatically became a hate figure to one faction or the other in a Northern Ireland divided by religion—it sounds like something out of ancient history, and that’s where it all stems from and should have stayed, but it is a modern-day fact.

Martin’s attitude was that I should come to Celtic and then we would deal with whatever problems arose. I was happy to go along with that advice, but truthfully, neither of us anticipated the escalation of problems or the lack of support I would get when things boiled over as they duly did in the Norway game.

As we approached half-time with Norway winning 3-0, it was clear that something would have to happen. All of the team had suffered as a result of the abuse—not surprisingly, their concentration was less than total. Opinions differ as to what exactly took place at half-time, but my recollection is that Sammy McIlroy came to me and said that he had spoken to Martin about taking me off at the interval before the game in any case. Given that I was relatively new at Celtic and should not be playing every minute of every game, that sounded plausible.

I have to say that in retrospect, I don’t think Sammy handled things very well that night. Martin O’Neill has no memory of such a conversation, and perhaps Sammy said this at the time to cover up the deep embarrassment which he and the Irish Football Association’s officials were undoubtedly feeling. I would have preferred him to be up front, to have said ‘we’re going to take you off for your own sake and we’ll deal with this afterwards’, but what was happening was completely new to him and being honest, I think he was overwhelmed by it all. My team-mates were also embarrassed and that was understandable—I don’t know how I would have reacted had it been someone else in the team getting the jeers. Some people later suggested that they should have shown solidarity and refused to come out for the second half, but I would not have wanted that, not least because it would have worsened the situation with the crowd. In addition, they were getting no lead from the manager or the Irish FA to do something of that nature.

After the match, Sammy tried to play things down and was so blas?in interviews that unfortunately he gave out the wrong message. It was as though he did not understand what lay at the heart of the whole situation. He indicated that everyone got booed at some time or another in their career—a remark that angered my family in particular, as they were the ones who had been forced to live with the appalling graffiti and who would now be the centre of unwanted attention back home in Lurgan.

I know what Martin O’Neill would have done—he would have addressed that section of the crowd who were abusing me and told them to cease their activities forthwith. And I suspect the majority of the crowd would have backed him, though realistically nothing was going to deter the bigoted boo boys.

But Martin wasn’t there. Instead, nothing happened at all. Neither Sammy nor anyone from the Irish FA confronted the issue at the time, and there were no warnings to the crowd that I heard, though to be fair the abuse was roundly condemned afterwards. So the minority got their wicked way. The football pitch can be a very lonely place, and I never felt so isolated in a match as I did on that night against Norway.

My substitution led to an even more bizarre event. I got dressed as quickly as possible and then did an interview outside the dressing room in which I gave my response to what had happened to the BBC.

This is what I told them: ‘A lot of people got behind me tonight and I was touched by that. There are minorities in all walks of life who make trouble for everyone else. But there are a lot more good people than bad in this country. I hope to be back but first I will talk things over with my club and family and take it from there.’ That really was the situation—I didn’t want to make a decision immediately.

The Royal Ulster Constabulary then stepped in. Some of the officers were worried about my safety, and I couldn’t very well go and sit in the dugout or the stand, could I? They insisted that I miss the rest of the game and go with them in an unmarked car. That’s how I found myself making a swift exit from Windsor Park and being whisked through the back streets of East Belfast in the back of a fairly beaten-up car that no one could have mistaken for a police vehicle. Here I was, minutes after playing for my country, getting a police escort through its largest city—it was beyond satire and in the realms of madness. I never did get to see what happened in the second half, though things must have improved as we only conceded one more goal and lost 4-0.

The police took me back to the hotel to fetch my stuff and I returned quickly to Glasgow where the following morning I went to Parkhead, home of Celtic, and discussed what had happened with Martin O’Neill. Some people in the media had already speculated that I might retire from international football, and for once they were close to the mark. I told Martin that I didn’t know what to do and really wasn’t sure that I should go back and play for Northern Ireland, and certainly not at Windsor Park. He had been as shocked as anyone and could see I was still upset, but his advice was that I should give it another go as I might regret it in the long term, and perhaps miss out on the chance to play in major finals such as the European Championships.

The massive press speculation that I would quit international football continued for days and I decided to speak out. I said truthfully that I was considering standing down from the Northern Ireland squad but needed more time to think things through.

Meanwhile a huge furore had broken out over what had happened to me. The Irish FA’s community relations officer Michael Boyd said he would be calling for action: ‘The time has come for the IFA to send out a strong message that this sort of behaviour cannot be tolerated. Banning these people is what the majority of decent supporters want.’

He was promptly contradicted by a different IFA spokesman who was quoted as saying: ‘Obviously we are very disappointed by the reaction of a section of the crowd. But there is very little we can do about it.

’It is very difficult to counter a small element. We don’t even know who they are. It might have been Rangers supporters coming over for the match, because we’d read press reports before this match that Rangers supporters were planning to attend to give Neil Lennon a hard time.’

Talk about living in cloud cuckoo land…so hundreds of Rangers fans travelled from Scotland just to boo me? I’m not exactly the Rangers supporters’ favourite person but I don’t think hundreds of people would go that far just to jeer me.

There were all sorts of mixed messages coming from the Irish FA. Its president Jim Boyce condemned the abuse but said that the majority of the crowd were behind me. He told reporters: ‘I have no time for bigotry in any walk of life, let alone football. I have no time for sectarianism and I totally oppose it, as I’ve always done.

’You had a certain section of people with moronic brains who did boo. But the vast majority of people in the ground were supporting Neil Lennon and it’s important not to forget that.’

The press and politicians also weighed in, and I was touched by the many ordinary decent folk who did try to encourage me to play on. But this was not really helping me one bit. I lay awake at night wondering what to do. I spoke to friends and most importantly, to my family, and with their backing I eventually decided that I would carry on playing.

Sammy McIlroy was grateful for my decision and assured me I was very much an important part of his plans. My next game for Northern Ireland was against the Czech Republic. I was nervous beforehand and despite assurances from the Irish FA, who had appealed for decent fans to support me, I was worried about the ‘welcome’ I would receive. I need not have been so apprehensive. My name was cheered to the echo when it was announced and I was warmly applauded onto the field. I did not kid myself that this show of support was unanimous, but it was incredibly heartening that ordinary football fans were prepared to stand up and be counted on my behalf. Sammy McIlroy would later say that their response had ‘drilled it in’ that the supporters wanted me in the team.

My own feelings before the match were that I would give it one more go and my continued career for Northern Ireland would depend on the reaction at Windsor Park. There were people within the Irish FA who had wanted my participation to be seen as a statement that the boo boys would not be allowed to win, but I had not been taking that line in public—I just wanted to play football for my country and not be abused.

After another two World Cup qualifiers against Bulgaria, which we lost home and away, I missed three games but was picked to be part of the squad in matches running up to the European Championships. Even though my knee was bothering me, I came on as substitute against Poland in a friendly in Limassol in Cyprus which we lost 1-4. At the start of what would be a momentous season for Celtic and for me personally, Northern Ireland played Cyprus. In view of what transpired, it was interesting that the match was to be co-sponsored by Northern Ireland’s Community Relations Council. There were also to be banners saying ‘Give Sectarianism The Boot’. You may shortly appreciate the irony…

A few hours before the match it was announced that in my forty-first appearance for my country, I would captain the national side. Steve Lomas was injured and Michael Hughes was unavailable while Gerry Taggart, who would probably have been given the armband, was also out with a knee injury. With those players out, I was the most experienced player in the squad and pretty much the obvious choice to lead the side. By default, almost, the captain’s armband was passed to me, even though I felt I was not 100 per cent match fit as I had undergone a knee operation during the close season.

It was often forgotten in the aftermath of what transpired that I had actually captained Northern Ireland before. We played the Republic of Ireland in 1999 in a benefit match and at one point in the second half there was a raft of substitutions. The manager at the time, Lawrie McMenemy, was a good and decent man who did what he thought was right rather than convenient. Lawrie would later recall: ‘My over-riding memory was when I gave the armband to Neil after I brought off my skipper. He could barely keep his chest inside his shirt and was as proud as punch.’

I was indeed very proud, just as I was thrilled to bits when Lawrie made me captain from the start in an away match against Finland. But I was still at Leicester then. This time I was a Celtic player and that was to make all the difference.

When Sammy told me early in the week of the Cyprus match that I was going to be captain I was delighted. We were installed as usual in the Hilton hotel in Templepatrick and were doing our routine of training and discussing tactics, but it all took on a different dimension for me on the Monday when I was appointed captain.

Sammy went public with the news the night before the match and all the newspapers carried his statements explaining his reasons.

’He is my sixth captain,’ he was quoted as saying. ‘With no disrespect to Neil, being the sixth captain shows you the problems we have had. Hopefully, things will change. He is the second most-capped player in the current squad. Being in the engine room he can start us off with his passing and knowledge of the game.

’Neil is a leader; he has been captain for Celtic as well. It’s a good honour for him. I hope he enjoys it and that his performance rubs off on the rest of the lads.’

I certainly was honoured, and my family were also proud and delighted for me. At a press conference I emphasized that the unpleasant events of the Norway game were in the past and that I preferred to look forward. I said honestly that it had been difficult for me at the time, but I had put it all behind me, and added the thought that being named captain was a nice way to start the season.

The political situation in Northern Ireland had also changed. It was now more than four years on from the Good Friday Agreement, and I thought there was genuine goodwill on all sides. But one man in a phone box many miles away thought differently.

It all went pear shaped late in the afternoon. We were having our pre-match meal and I had just come down to the tables when Sammy took me to one side. He told me straightforwardly that there were two police officers from the newly named Police Service of Northern Ireland (PSNI) outside wanting to talk to me.

I asked him what it was about, and he told me there had been a phone call and I would have to talk to the officers—one male and one female—about it. I knew immediately what the call was, and my heart sank into my boots. For in the run-up to the match I knew I was ‘fair game’ for any madman wanting to make a point and I had anticipated someone trying to get publicity for their ‘cause’, especially after it was announced that I would captain the side. But I had not thought it would go as far as someone threatening my life.

The two police officers—as is the accepted protocol in writing about Northern Ireland, they must remain anonymous—were very matter of fact. They said that there had been a telephone call to the BBC’s offices in Belfast by someone who claimed to represent the LVF. The threat was that if I played that night I would get hurt. Without it being needed to be said, we all knew that in all probability ‘hurt’ meant getting shot.

I asked the officers how genuine the threat was and they said that nine out of ten of these calls prior to sporting events were hoaxes.

They were firm, however, that they could not tell me what to do. That decision would have to be mine and they would react accordingly. I presumed that meant if I decided to play I would get armed police escorts to and from the game etc., but my immediate thought was how would anyone be able to stop someone getting to me in the many public areas I would enter that night, not least the Windsor Park pitch?

My first reaction, nevertheless, was that I should play on. The percentage bet was that the whole thing was a hoax and I would be safe. But a whole whirlwind of thoughts started coursing through my mind, the vast majority of which centred on my family and their safety. And finally it came down to this—how much of a bet do you take with your life?

This time Sammy McIlroy reacted well and sympathetically. He said that if the call had been about his son, he would want him to go home.

My mind was in turmoil at that second. I really didn’t know what to do and I knew I needed advice.

I used my mobile phone to call Celtic’s security adviser in Scotland—unfortunately, I knew him only too well as I had had reason to call him previously—and he was adamant that I should take no chances whatsoever and should get back to Glasgow as soon as possible.

I then called my parents. My father said that of course I could not play and he would come and get me. He rushed to the hotel and was angered that no one could tell him where I was. He eventually made his way to my room where I was just finishing packing. A few minutes later I was in his car and on my way home to Lurgan. We had a police escort at first but then some friends met us and we travelled in convoy for the rest of the journey. I have not been back to Windsor Park since…and Dad still has his unused complimentary tickets for the match in which I didn’t captain Northern Ireland.

Before I left the hotel, I told Sammy that I probably would not be returning to play for the national side ever again. He was entirely understanding but said he hoped I would change my mind. I then spoke to most of the rest of the squad. I learned later that one or two had wanted the Irish FA to pull the team out of the match, but I insisted before the match that they should go on and do their best. My thoughts genuinely were for the team as I knew they had a tough campaign ahead and needed the match practice.

It was agreed that the Irish FA would put out my press statement and that there would be a cover story that I was already on the way back to Glasgow. In reality, there was no way to catch a plane home at that time and I would have to spend a night in Lurgan.

My statement read: ‘After close consultation with the footballing authorities and the Police Service of Northern Ireland I will not be participating in this evening’s international game.

’I am very disappointed that my desire to play for my country, on my first opportunity to captain my team at home, has been taken away from me.’

In the car on the way to Lurgan, my father and I talked things over. He was very angry, of course, as was I, but funnily enough I was a bit more philosophical.

In a sense there was an inevitability about these events. For better or worse, I had become a controversial figure, both in Scotland and in Northern Ireland. I was a symbol for one side, the epitome of what was wanted in a Celtic man dedicated to the club he loved, whereas for the other side I was something to despise. I could see that the two sides would never meet on common ground, and that there would always be extremists who simply could not tolerate my presence in a Northern Ireland jersey.

My main thoughts were for my family. It was hard enough for them when I joined Celtic, and the graffiti before the Norway game had been an awful experience for them. My father told me that ‘a cold chill’ had gripped him when he first saw the pictures. So I just could not in all conscience put them through that strain again.

And I had my daughter to think of. We had managed to shield Alisha—at home in England and just ten years old—from the dreadful facts of her father’s life in a divided city and country. How was I now going to explain to her that her daddy’s life was under threat because he played football for a certain team?

All these things and more raced through my mind as we hurried back to Lurgan. In retrospect it was then that I finally decided I would not play for Northern Ireland again. Frankly, given my thoughts for my family, the decision was pretty easy for me.

The proof of the effects such happenings can have on family members met me at the door of our house in Lurgan. My mother was very upset, and in turn that affected me. After a brief reunion with the other members of my family, who all backed my decision, it was agreed that I should get away from the house. We knew it would only be a short time before the news broke and then a media scrum would descend on us. As long as I wasn’t there, the journalists, photographers and camera crews would go away.

My family were able to say truthfully to callers that I was not at home, for I was in fact at the house of my best friend, Gary McCavigan. We have been mates since schooldays and now, when I needed him most, Gary was there for me, and his presence would lead to the only light-hearted note in this whole symphony of sadness.

As the evening wore on, Gary and I talked and talked but eventually we decided to try to get some sleep. Gary’s wife and daughter took one bedroom and we were in the other bedroom. It may not surprise you to learn that I didn’t get a wink of sleep that night. Every time a car went by the house I was startled, and I kept imagining that people were out there trying to find me.

And maybe one of them had a gun…but it wasn’t that fear which stopped my brain from switching off—no, it was Gary’s snoring that kept me awake!

In the wee small hours, the ludicrous nature of the situation really struck me and I had a laugh to myself—what else could I do?

The next morning my dad called to say that a journalist who was known and respected by the family, Adrian Logan of Ulster Television, had made contact. I spoke to him and he pointed out that I would get no peace until I had given an interview and made some sort of statement. I could see that was true. He offered to make the proceedings available to other television stations and on that basis I agreed to do a short interview.

The gist of it was my feeling that football had been irrelevant the previous night. I said: ‘My parents were pretty distraught really. I’ve got a ten-year-old daughter who knows nothing about this at the minute and we’re going to try to keep her away from it as much as we can. Obviously, I can’t put them through this every time, so I’ve thought long and hard about it and I’ve decided that I probably won’t be going back to play for Northern Ireland.

’It’s a decision that I’ve thought about previously and this time I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s probably for the best for everybody.

’My manager, Sammy McIlroy, was magnificent with me throughout it. He said if it was his son in the same position, he’d do exactly the same thing and he backed me on that and I can’t thank him enough for that, because obviously it was difficult for him, but this can’t go on.’

With that I jumped in the car and headed for Scotland. It was a relief to get back to Glasgow and the catcalls I get there on a daily basis.

That night Celtic’s security team put me up in a hotel as they feared that I would get no peace at home. I sat there alone in that hotel room making calls to my family and friends and watching the television. I was utterly amazed when the news programmes were completely dominated by what had happened to me. When you have reached a certain level in football, having to watch yourself on television is one of the more unnerving experiences that you go through. I had never quite got used to seeing myself play, never mind being interviewed off the pitch, but here I was now featuring in the headlines and in the main bulletins. It was almost as if I was watching a different person—who was this Neil Lennon they kept referring to along with the words ‘death threats’? How could a mere footballer gain such attention? But of course, it wasn’t my footballing prowess that was the issue.

As I lay there contemplating my future I couldn’t help but think of quitting the game altogether. Only my desire to succeed at Celtic kept me from walking away.

Even so, I had lost something very special. No one except another footballer can really know about the long hard hours of work that go into reaching the top level that is international football. All the other sacrifices such as special diets and the rigours of self-discipline through the years all count towards your achievements, and here was I with the pinnacle of my career to date snatched away from me by a man with a telephone. It seemed for a while that all the hard work had not been worth the candle.

The following day the LVF announced they had nothing to do with the call. That actually made me feel a lot better—it now appeared that it really was a hoax, and the caller would also not want to make enemies of those lads.

But I had made up my mind and before Celtic’s weekend match against Partick Thistle I told a press conference of my final and irrevocable decision to quit playing international football.

‘It’s’ not a snap decision,’ I said. ‘I’ve thought long and hard about it. It would have been nice in a way to turn things right round from that experience in the Norway game, but it has reared its ugly head again. I can’t keep putting the people I love most through the wringer yet again. They suffer most.

’Genuine Northern Ireland fans have sent me many letters of support during this whole period. I really feel sorry for everyone associated with the Northern Ireland team but I have to move on from this situation.

’It’s not only my parents and the rest of my family. I have to think about Sammy McIlroy and the team as well. It’s not right that the focus should be taken away from them for all the wrong reasons. It’s also disruptive to what Sammy is trying to do. Just hours before the game he was forced to change his whole plan because of this.

’So I feel it’s best for everybody that I make this decision now. The game will go on, it will continue and I hope the lads go on and do really well. But enough is enough. This can’t go on. The buck stops with me, and I want to nip it in the bud.’

I then played against Partick at Firhill in something of a strange dream. At the start I was applauded by both sets of supporters—I will always be grateful to the Thistle fans for that gesture. But my mind wasn’t really on the game.

I received messages of support from across the world, some of it from most surprising places. There was a letter from leading Unionist politician David Irvine expressing his abhorrence of what had happened and Unionist party leader David Trimble stated his concerns.

Michael Boyd of the Irish FA’s Community Relations Department wrote to say: ‘The IFA’s Community Relations Department is 100 per cent behind you at what must be a very difficult period of your career. In partnership with the supporters we are working hard to eradicate sectarianism from the game in Northern Ireland. Much progress has been made in this area in recent years and that is why it is so disappointing what happened at the Cyprus game. We are all totally gutted and frustrated that the actions of a very small minority have taken away from all the very positive work being carried out by our supporters to make the game more inclusive.’

John McMillan, chairman of the Rangers Supporters Association, told the press that what had happened was ‘absolutely disgusting’. He added: ‘These are not football fans. I don’t care who is involved or which side the threats come from, it is terrible for any person to be treated in that way. It’s hard to imagine what it must be like when you’re not in Neil Lennon’s position, but I would probably feel the same way as he does. I would hope for his own sake that he does continue in international football, but I can understand you have to think about your own safety and that of your family.’ Thanks for that, John—I believe that to be an eloquent expression of the feelings of most ordinary decent fans, whatever their club.

Even the British Government got involved. Northern Ireland Deputy First Minister Mark Durkan said: ‘The sectarian threats against Neil Lennon are deplorable. Sectarianism and paramilitarism should not intrude into the sporting arena.’

Around the world, it seemed that every major newspaper and broadcaster carried the story—it even made headlines in the USA where soccer is rarely regarded as newsworthy. I suppose that for a short period I was one of the most famous players on the planet, though not for a reason I would ever have wanted.

Some pundits would later say that I had been ill-advised to call for the football teams of Northern Ireland and the Republic to be united, but not for the first or last time, they were misquoting or misunderstanding what I had said in an interview some weeks before the match. I had said that a team drawn from all of Ireland’s thirty-two counties would do better than the two separate teams. In saying that I was only recognizing that in rugby union, all Ireland played as one and did so very successfully. But at no point did I say the two countries should unite, in football or politically. In fact, I was only stating the same position as the late George Best, the greatest of all Northern Irish players. But then he didn’t play for Celtic.

In the aftermath, much was made of the fact that the call was apparently a hoax. Two detectives from the PSNI came to Glasgow to interview me and said it was probably a hoax, but they had taken it seriously enough to trace the call and found it came from a phone box in Rathcoole in north Belfast. But how does anyone actually know that it was a hoax? How can anyone prove 100 per cent that the caller was not some deranged lunatic with a gun? In Northern Ireland and elsewhere I had seen players assaulted on the pitch by fans—what if one of them had a gun and wanted to make a name for himself?

One English journalist wrote I was a ‘big girl’s blouse’ for not risking death. Funnily enough, he never had the courage to say that to my face…

Maybe I could have gone out and played but what kind of focus would I have had? How could anyone perform to their best in such a situation? The fact is that I did not play that night and have never played for Northern Ireland since, and therefore the caller did not need to carry out the threat, so we will never know for certain whether or not it was a hoax. That reasoning seems to have been lost on the alleged intellect of people like that English journo.

What might have been the most upsetting speculation was that pulling out of the game served some sort of hidden agenda on my part. But I did not let that nonsense upset me because you cannot reason with idiocy like that. It’s the sort of biased reasoning which has seen me burned in effigy on the tops of bonfires across Northern Ireland on 12 July, the great Unionist and Protestant day of celebration—I must be rivalling Guy Fawkes for being ‘toasted’.

After that weekend, things did die down a little, and I was left to pick up the pieces. I took a long time to recover fully and it did affect my form for Celtic. But in the long run it may have been a blessing as quitting the international game may have prolonged my club career. I long ago concluded that I was correct to make my decision to quit, even though I have had tinges of regret—though I have never missed the exhausting trips to out-of-the-way places like Moldova.

It had been an awful experience, not least because it was my first real contact with the people and issues of ‘the Troubles’. I had never made public my political views or my religious leanings, but here was I, a footballer, being treated as some sort of public hate figure, not because I was making statements but because I was a Catholic who wore the green and white hoops of Celtic.

What message did it send to young Catholics in Northern Ireland that they could be singled out for such treatment if they ever played for Celtic? A lot of Catholics will not attend matches at Windsor Park—after what happened to me, can you blame them?

The plan for a new national stadium, principally for football, to be built elsewhere in Northern Ireland could be a good start in uniting the country behind its sportspeople, as used to happen with our football team and individuals like Olympic champion Mary Peters and world champion boxer Barry McGuigan. I think that a new stadium will be a big step forward for sport in Northern Ireland.

In the meantime there is undoubtedly a cancer in the society of Northern Ireland and it will take a long time to excise. But that cancer should not be allowed to infect sport.

You can argue that the Old Firm have profited from being on the two sides of the sectarian divide, and I would not disagree. But events have often been way beyond their control and what happened to me was a wholly different matter—the incidents took place in the international arena while I was playing for my country; they were seen by the whole world as disgraceful; and they damaged me as a person.

I have to confess I was scarred by those events. I will admit now that I really and truly was in fear for my life at times. No one can undergo such an experience and not be affected. And yes, it made me bitter against the ‘other side’ for a time, something I had never been before. But I have accepted things and in time I have lost that bitterness. I believe it all made me a stronger person in the long run.

I had to be strong, for it was not to be the last time I would be assailed and indeed assaulted because I played for Celtic.