Читать книгу Lagom: The Swedish Art of Living a Balanced, Happy Life - Niki Brantmark - Страница 7

Fourteen years ago, I was invited to spend my summer holiday with a Swedish friend.

The long hours of daylight were spent eating home-baked waffles with strawberry jam, swimming in the sea and soaking up the sun on Sweden’s West Coast. The days were carefree and uncomplicated. We had no schedule to keep, no fancy meals to prepare and work couldn’t have been further from our minds. It was about slowing down, enjoying the warmer weather and making the most of what nature had to offer, surrounded by family and friends. It was the perfect setting for the beginnings of a love affair – not only with my Swedish husband but also with the Swedish way of life.

I found myself captivated by this slower, fuss-free way of living. And when my husband and I discussed who should make the ‘big move’ one year later, I was on my way to the airport faster than I could say ‘Jag!’ (me!).

As I settled into Swedish life, I realized that the calm approach isn’t confined to the holidays. At work, it’s normal to set tasks aside regularly and take a fika (a break involving a coffee and a treat of some kind). Children enjoy two extra years of play before starting school (compared to their UK counterparts). And celebrations like Christmas and midsummer are generally scaled-back affairs with a strong focus on being together. In other words, our Nordic friends take their time to do things right – in a wonderful, uncomplicated way.

It was at a dinner party in my adopted hometown of Malmö that I learnt the philosophy behind this way of life.

‘Do you know the word lagom?’ my new Swedish friends asked over dinner. ‘You don’t have a translation for it in English,’ they said proudly.

‘Does it mean “perfect”?’ I ventured.

‘No, not perfect – it’s sort of “just right”,’ they explained, nodding in agreement with each other.

Lagom, pronounced ‘lah-gom’ (‘la’ like ‘far’, ‘gom’ like ‘from’), is an overarching concept that is heavily ingrained in the Swedish psyche. Often loosely translated as ‘everything ‘in moderation’ or ‘not too much and not too little’, lagom is about finding a balance that works for you. Water can be lagom warm. You can work a lagom amount. Trousers can be a lagom fit. It’s a word you can use in almost any context, which is also what makes it fascinating.

Lagom is commonly thought to derive from Viking times, rooted in the term laget om (around the team). It’s said a bowl or horn of mead would be passed in a circle, and it was important that everyone only sipped their ‘fair share’ so there was enough to go round. The Vikings wouldn’t usually be first on my list as a moral compass, but they were certainly on to something. Today, lagom is closely linked to the Swedish cultural and social ideology of fairness and equality. Ferociously independent they may be, but Swedes are also known for working together for the collective good. Taking the ‘right amount’ is a step towards ensuring that no one amasses too much and no one is left wanting.

Whether it’s applied to work, leisure, family and relationships, holidays and celebrations, interior design or living in a way that’s kinder to the planet, the Swedes will often tell you that lagom är bäst – the right amount is best, and moderation is key.

Having said that, there’s definitely a time for excess in Sweden. If you’ve ever been to a Swedish midsummer celebration or drunk a cup of their (exceedingly strong) freshly brewed coffee, you’ll know what I mean. It’s just that they won’t punish themselves with abstinence afterwards. The Swede will simply continue enjoying everything in moderation (until the next celebration comes along!).

By deliberately seeking a more manageable, comfortable, balanced way of doing things (and finding perfection in imperfection), you’re not just taking the pressure off yourself – you’re taking the pressure off others, too. And you’re gaining more of today’s most precious resource: time.

In a world where we’re connected 24/7 and have so much on our plates, wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all slow down a little and lead a life with less stress and more time for the things we love?

You are no doubt exercising lagom in many aspects of your life already. However, I hope the ideas in this book will help you think more consciously about introducing lagom in other ways, too; in a way that works for you. By making subtle changes to your everyday routine, you can find greater balance – and make time for the things that matter most in life. Even if it’s just taking time out of your day to enjoy a fika!