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Chapter 2
Bear with Me
ОглавлениеTraders and investors are very familiar with bears. The market is seen as a constant battle between bulls and bears. Ironically, in the kingdom of animal spirits, the bear represents the forces that ground us. It's strength incarnate. The bear in all of us allows us to have courage, to overcome adversity, and for those of us who face our demons in life, it supports our healing, both physically and – perhaps more important to our life as a trader – emotionally.
One of the first things I do with any trader, whether the individual is a total stone-cold newbie or has been trading for over 20 years, is discuss the person's weaknesses.
Why's that? Because good traders know why they make money, but what they may not be aware of is why they don't make more money. As humans, we often have limited awareness of our Achilles' heels.
Many of us know the story of Achilles. In Greek mythology, when Achilles was a baby, it was foretold that he would die young. To prevent his death, his mother Thetis took Achilles to the River Styx, which was supposed to offer powers of invulnerability, and dipped his body into the water. But as Thetis held Achilles by the heel, his heel was not washed over by the water of the magical river. Achilles grew up to be a man of war who survived many great battles. But one day, a poisonous arrow shot at him was lodged in his heel, killing him shortly after. Hence, the term Achilles' heel!
I myself have experienced this in my trading life, and even in other aspects of my life. I'm really good at finding trends, and mapping out plans, but sometimes I take other trades that don't have the same “hit rate” or quantifiable winning percentage that the trends I've followed and trusted for 15 years do. I will therefore put myself in a position where my best trends are being traded as a “gut” trade, or some less reliable technical pattern. Like many traders, I am ADHD to the max, and patience is not a virtue I have found a lot of time for in my life.
I thus put myself in a position where my best trades work and I should make money, but I have given back profits – sometimes partially and sometimes fully – and if I get really silly, I lose and am too frustrated to take a trade that I have a proven track record making money on!
I can't possibly relay to you the vast amount of times I've had clients who, despite me being on a really long roll of winners, will tell me how they lost. Why? Because their Achilles' heel(s) were causing them to fear taking a trade at the right time, or worse, causing them to seek another trade that doesn't have nearly the track record. They guess, hoping to be right, or they enter the trade sorry they missed the correct entry, hoping they can make it up and still cash in. No matter how many times I bang the drum that you shouldn't chase a play, every trader I've ever met will do so at some – or many – points. While they are buying, we're selling them the shares, having reaped a nice profit oftentimes.
The Achilles Have It
There are as many potential Achilles' heels as there are traders! I could spend an entire book writing about all the flaws of traders I've experienced over the last 15 years, but that would bore me and I'm sure you as well. Hell, it might bore you enough to make a foolish trade trying to escape the boredom…and we definitely don't want that!
What I am much more interested in is how we use our bear spiritual guide, which some of us will align with more than others, to help us heal our Achilles so when we go into battle no poison darts can kill us. We may get wounded, we may sometimes be on trader life support, but we remain in battle and continue to patch up whatever flaws we have until we are much better traders.
Identifying Your Achilles' Heel
Step 1 is identifying your Achilles' heel(s). If you can't do this, then you are likely to fall prey to it/them over and over again until you are doomed, your account is at zero, and you are best to give up and try something else.
So, first, being honest with yourself is integral to your success, and ultimately in constantly improving your performance. Even the most brilliant, successful traders want to do better if they are interested in improving themselves.
So, how do we identify our flaws?
Ah, let's do it step by step.
Step 1: Identify Your Strengths
This time let's start with your strengths. Get a notebook and take 15 minutes (a real 15 minutes) and truly think about what strengths you bring to the table as a trader. If you are a newbie, great, write down the attributes you have that you feel will make you a good, or perhaps, great trader. For example:
Discipline
Patience
Good rule follower
Know the value of money (I had to learn this one the hard way!)
Have your priorities straight
And so on…
Even if you feel it's silly, no one is grading this – it's for your edification. No one else will ever see it if you don't want them to. And, if this part is lacking because you aren't aware of your strengths, that's okay as well. Then write down the things you want to be strong with as your sort of wish-list, let's call it.
Step 2: Fake It' Til You Make It!
Now let's go through your level of experience, in trading preferably, but also experience in other careers, jobs, or even your love life. What experience do you have that makes you think you can succeed as a trader? Perhaps you are good at making dinner for 25 guests at Thanksgiving and you have the wherewithal to deal with adversity. Perhaps you are an accountant and so you know the value of money, and you have a lot of discipline to follow rules. Whatever you feel gives you the “right” to succeed as a trader, write it down on a separate piece of paper in your notebook.
This will allow you to identify how your strengths have already served you, whether it's as an old-time successful trader or a plumber. I think most people can succeed at trading if they have some of the main attributes we are discussing, or they can learn to train themselves to attain those attributes: Discipline, money management, and overcoming adversity are three of the main ones.
In this step, act as if you are interviewing for a job with me for a trader position. How would you sell me without completely out-and-out lying?
Even if you don't believe any of what you are writing, that's okay. There's a 12-step program that suggests that newcomers “Fake it' til you make it!” sometimes we don't fit into our clothes once we try them on a few times and they are too small for us, but we make some small dietary changes and voila! we fit into our new pair of jeans. Don't worry, that's not lying unless you exaggerate your potential to such a degree as you'll never fit into it. So, be realistic, but aim high. No one gets a job for the first time feeling like the perfect fit; typically, you have to grow into it. Allow yourself the possibility that you can grow into your potentials – fake it' til you make it!
Step 3: Achilles' Time
Now, it's Achilles' time! Now we need to be brutally honest, keep the built-up potential, but be brave enough – be the bear, and dig deep into yourself to pull out all the things you feel will get in your way of being as successful as you like. If you are successful, what's preventing you from being more successful? Take a third piece of paper and take another 15 minutes and delve deep. Not so deep that you tear yourself to shreds telling yourself how horrible you are (that is an Achilles' heel in and of itself, one I've encountered many times with clients over the years).
Many of us are trained to self-criticize so much that we feel guilty for having any positive attributes at times. I am one of those people. I was taught early on in life that my opinion didn't matter, that I would accomplish very little, and that I'd be lucky to get a job as a bank clerk. No offense to those among us who are bank clerks, but typically bank clerks I know (I was one!) want to be promoted at some point; they don't aspire to be a bank clerk forever. I just was rarely, if ever, given positive encouragement. The only time I recall being given such feedback was when I played baseball and pitched. That was the one, and only, thing I recall being confident about…until I blew my arm out at 15 and was never able to throw the ball again with any real purpose. It blew my mind up, because I had no self-esteem about anything else. I got very depressed when I couldn't do the one thing I loved as a child. So, listen, I get it if you are a low-esteem/low-confidence individual. Unfortunately there are too many of us who were given that message and who were taught to believe it. I'm here to tell you that it's not true; if you're reading this book, then it's likely you have the innate ability to grow, learn, and excel. The belief in that will come in time. For now, I need you to focus on your real Achilles' heels, and one of them just may be your lack of focus, or your negative attitude that nothing will ever work for you.
I've heard clients from around the world at times tell me they can't succeed, they always “take the losers” and it'll “never change.”
Yeah, you know what? It won't…unless we can get you to keep, as I said in Step 2, faking it' til you make it!
Step 4: Analyzing the Data
So, now that we have a good grasp on your strengths, the things you aspire to and what your flaws are, we can analyze that data and figure out a game plan on your best path to success.
Here's how we do that: Take your top three in each step, the three best attributes, the three things you most aspire to, and the three most deadliest of flaws you have. You there? Great, write them all on another separate Step 4 page(s).
Take the three top flaws from Step 3, your top Achilles' heels, and cross out the ones that relate to your Step 1 attributes. Leave the ones that don't apply. You may have none left, or all three; it's okay. There is no right answer. Most of you will have all three left I suspect since these are your top three positives and your top three challenges to overcome. If you do have some crossed out, then my guess is you haven't dug deep enough on your Achilles' heels and I'd start that process again – digging even deeper!
Now take all that's left and cross-check it with the things you aspire to, Step 2. Here you should start to see some scratch-offs – but don't scratch these off! Just put check marks next to each of the things you have as flaws that are covered by what you aspire to.
Now, I want you to add any of the things you aspire to – use the entire Step 2 list, not just the top three – that you didn't list in Step 3. I suspect many of you will find at least one or two or more traits you aspire to that aren't under your Step 3.
Add those to Step 3. Now you should have a pretty complete idea of all the things we need to work on. You have the top challenges, and you have the lesser ones.
How the Steps Work
STEP 1 – Take 15 minutes and WRITE DOWN all your strengths – be as thorough as possible!
STEP 2 – Now, pretend you are interviewing for a job and you are trying to sell yourself – WRITE DOWN all the strengths you aspire to have, or others have told you that you have but you aren't as secure in them as you would like.
STEP 3 – WRITE DOWN all your WEAKNESSES – your Achilles' heels! ALL OF THEM! Don't be shy; no one else should see this unless you want him or her to!
STEP 4 – ANALYZE the data using the blueprint I map out in the Step 4 section. Let's get as accurate a “selfie” as you can of yourself!
Okay, so now here's what I want you to do – the Step 3 items that are not on your Step 2 items you aspire to – add them to Step 2.
You need to aspire to them.
You now have a very good idea of what you need to do to improve your trading, whether you are a newbie or a seasoned pro.