Читать книгу I Have No Secrets - Penny Joelson - Страница 6

1

I tense as soon as I hear the doorbell. I know it’s him. I know it’s Dan. Sarah’s still upstairs getting ready and I hope she comes down soon. I don’t want him coming in here.

Mum calls up to Sarah and I hear her say she’ll be down in a tick. ‘We’ve been keeping her busy, I’m afraid,’ Mum tells Dan, ‘so she hasn’t had much time to get ready!’

‘Ah, I know she wouldn’t have it any other way,’ says Dan. ‘She’s a diamond – and you too. What you do for these kids.’

I listen to them chatting away and Mum laughing at Dan’s jokes. Everyone loves Dan. Then Mum says she must get back to the kitchen, she’s left things on the stove and she’s sure Sarah won’t be long.

It’s quiet for a moment. I hear the distant clattering of pans in the kitchen. Then I hear Dan’s voice, coming closer as he speaks.

‘What are you watching, then? Ah – Pointless !’

I can hear him breathing. Then he whispers, ‘Bit like your life, eh, Jemma?’

He’s standing behind me now, but I can’t see him because my wheelchair is facing the TV. I try to focus on the quiz questions and forget he’s there, but he gives a long, dramatic sigh.

‘Don’t know how you can bear it.’ His voice is low, not loud enough to be overheard. ‘Watching the telly must be the most excitement you get.’ He only speaks like this when no one else is around. He used to ignore me completely, but not any more.

He moves so he is in front of me, blocking my view of the TV. Grimacing, he leans forwards. I get a gulping feeling, a tightness in my throat.

‘If I were you, I’d top myself,’ he whispers.

My heart thuds as he rubs his head thoughtfully.

‘Oh, yeah – you can’t, can you? Listen,’ he continues, ‘if you ever want a bit of help, I could –’

We both hear footsteps on the stairs. Dan backs away. His face transforms from ugly sneer to fake grin, his features softening as if they have been remoulded.

‘I’d have done better than that pair!’ he laughs, pointing to the telly. ‘Reckon we should go on this, eh, Sarah?’

I get a waft of Sarah’s perfume, which is quickly overtaken by the smell of onions frying in the kitchen.

‘I’m useless at quizzes,’ she laughs as she comes into view. ‘I bet Jemma could do it, though, if she had the chance.’

I don’t know about that, although I do sometimes get the right answers. It’s possible I’d be better than Sarah. She’s a brilliant carer, but she’s not too clever when it comes to general knowledge – or boyfriends.

At the edge of my vision, I see her kiss Dan softly on the lips.

Watching them, my own mouth feels suddenly dry.

The pair playing Pointless are out. They look very disappointed.

Dan and Sarah only have eyes for each other. ‘Ready?’ Dan smiles at Sarah. ‘You look stunning, babe.’

She nods and turns to me. Her eyes are sparkly, her cheeks flushed. ‘Bye, Jem. See you in the morning.’

‘See you, Jemma,’ says Dan. He winks at me.