Читать книгу Martinez's Pregnant Wife - Rachael Thomas - Страница 10
ОглавлениеLISA MARTINEZ TOOK a deep breath, trying to ease the nausea that had just started to become a normal part of her morning. She couldn’t put it off any longer. She had to tell him.
She was pregnant—expecting the baby of a man who wanted neither her nor any sort of commitment in his life. Icy fingers of dread slithered down her spine. What on earth was she going to do?
All she knew was that she had to tell Maximiliano, the man she’d fallen head over heels in love with from the moment their eyes had first met. The man she’d married, sure her love could bring them happiness. The man who’d walked out on her within months of exchanging vows. He was also the man she’d hurled the angry words I want a divorce at when the passion of their recent one night together had been extinguished by the cold light of day.
She knew exactly where Max would be right now. Ensconced in his office, chasing the next big deal, the next football club to drag up from the lowest league and make it great. It was his way of proving he could succeed, could still be something in the world of football despite the car accident that had cut short his career.
Lisa fought against the flurry of nerves that added to the nausea she’d been trying to shake off since she’d finally had the courage to see her doctor. There was no getting away from it now, no way she could deny it and no way to avoid telling Max. To do that would be to go against everything she believed in. She had to tell him that their night together two months ago had lasting consequences and before anyone else they worked with guessed. He might be her boss at the football club where she was a physio but he was still her husband, despite the divorce papers she knew the court had sent him. Max had to hear this from her.
She took a deep breath and then blew it out in an attempt to regain her composure, Max’s closed office door suddenly seeming more like the highest mountain on earth. She knocked and opened the door, stepping warily inside the masculine space. The room was empty. As she stood on the threshold, her hand still holding the door open, footsteps sounded in the corridor and she turned, knowing it wasn’t Max. Relief and annoyance rushed through her. She wanted to get this over and done with. Only then could she move on and leave this part of her life behind.
‘He’s not there,’ Max’s PA informed her as she slipped past her and put some files on the desk. ‘Probably gone for his usual coffee fix. Although he wasn’t in a good mood.’
‘He wasn’t?’ Lisa’s confidence began to erode like a cliff face pounded by an angry sea.
‘No. Far from it,’ his PA said as she ordered the files on his desk. ‘Very distracted.’
‘Thanks.’
Before she became further embroiled in conversation, Lisa turned and made her way out of the modern building that served as the headquarters for Max’s various business ventures. It was also the head offices of the latest struggling football club whose fortunes he was intent on turning around. The cold December air snatched her breath away as she walked toward the very place she and Max had drunk far too much wine two months ago during an evening that had been meant to be for discussing business.
That night should have been about her as the club’s physio and him as the club’s owner. Nothing more. Instead it had turned into being about each other, their marriage and the events that had led up to him walking out on her. Worse than that, it had soon become about the passion that still sparked between them, the consequences of which now linked them more closely and permanently than any marriage certificate ever could.
She stopped walking. She couldn’t do this. How could she tell the man who regretted marrying her that he was going to be a father? Maybe she should wait until after Christmas? It was tempting, but the thought of whispered gossip reaching him before she did pushed her back on course and she walked on, her boots sounding hard and loud on the pavement, tapping out a rhythm of determination she was far from feeling.
What was the worst he could do? Tell her he didn’t want anything to do with his child? That response was exactly what she expected and it certainly couldn’t be worse than his admission that he didn’t love her. The pain couldn’t be any harder to bear than that of losing the man she’d fallen in love with.
Two months ago, after doing her utmost to keep out of his way at work, at least until she’d found a new position, she’d allowed her heart to rule her head and had given into Max’s lethal charm. It had been the most foolhardy thing she’d done and now, with their baby growing inside her, she couldn’t afford to make the mistake again of fooling herself that he cared. Her head had to be well and truly in charge, keeping her heart locked away. This was not a time for sentimental dreams of love and happy ever afters. Such a thing would never be possible with Maximiliano Martinez. She knew that now.
She pushed open the door of the bar Max always favoured, the blast of warm air from the overhead heaters notching up the nausea as she walked in. The place was decked out for Christmas but at this hour of the morning it was practically deserted. She glanced into the dimness of the room and saw Max straight away, sitting with his back to her, staring ahead of him, seemingly oblivious to anything else.
His PA was right. He wasn’t in a good mood.
Her heart flipped over and tugged at the emotions she was desperate to keep under control. So much for being strong, for locking away her feelings. They were pouring from her like a torrent of rain, all jumbled up and veering from one extreme to another. She couldn’t decide if she was angry or nervous or even if she was doing the right thing as she stood looking at the man she knew she couldn’t remain married to, the man whose child she now carried.
The tension in Max’s broad shoulders was all too obvious as he sat, elbows on the table and hands clasped tightly and pressed against his chin. She walked slowly forward, coming round to his side, but still he didn’t see her, didn’t hear her. He was lost in thought.
Why was he so unreachable? She’d known he kept his emotions well-hidden even as she’d said I do, but had thought she could change that—change him. She’d thought she had love enough for them both and, after the hard upbringing she’d had, it was just another gamble in life she was prepared to take. But she couldn’t gamble any longer, not now there was a baby on the way.
Now she had to be mercenary. She didn’t want her child growing up as she had, feeling unloved, unwanted. She’d dreaded the days her father had turned up, demanding to see his little girl, not out of any kind of love, or even duty, but out of spite. She’d been the weapon he’d used to get at her mother and that would not be happening to her baby.
Planned or not, she wanted this baby, wanted to provide a happy and loving home, one free of any worries for her child, and after her childhood she knew that could only be achieved either entirely on her own or with the full support of a man who loved her and wanted the same. Max did not. He hadn’t even been able to commit to marriage so how could he possibly be there for his child? That left only one option. To get the divorce papers signed and end that chapter of her life so that she could raise her child alone. First she had to tell him. He had a right to know even if he never wanted to see his child.
‘Max.’ She put aside her past together with her future worries and focused on the present. She said his name softly as she moved toward him, but he remained still, lost in thought. She tried again, firmer this time. ‘Max.’
He turned and looked at her, his handsome features she knew and loved marred by an expression that struck dread into her heart. Had he already heard? Was it possible someone had already given away her secret?
‘What are you doing here, Lisa? Come to make sure I sign the divorce papers? Maybe you have found someone new and want to move on?’ His accent was more pronounced than she’d heard for a long time and anger glittered in his eyes. The heavier than usual shadow of stubble on a man who demanded nothing but perfection notched up her nerves. Something was seriously wrong. He must know. Was he now toying with her? Seeing how long she’d hold out on him?
Well, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. She would tell him before he could challenge her.
‘I have something to tell you.’ There was a waiver of uncertainty in her voice and, judging by the slight narrowing of his inky black eyes, he’d detected it.
‘Nothing I don’t already know. You are a bit late to the party, Lisa.’ The venom in his words sent her heart into freefall as panic raced around her. How could he be so callous about the baby? His baby. Even if he’d found out from the malicious whisperings of the club’s gossips, it was still his baby.
She lifted her chin and glared angrily at him. He wasn’t going to reduce her to a nervous wreck. She had to be strong, had to say what she needed to and then go—leave him to his foul mood. ‘I wasn’t aware such news required a party.’
He stood up, his height suddenly dominating the air she wanted to gulp down in order to remain calm. As always he wore a dark suit, tailored and very expensive, which fitted him to perfection and she couldn’t help but allow her eyes to travel down his long legs. The part of her that loved this man fought for supremacy, not wanting to freeze him out of her life. But hadn’t he already done that when he walked out on her so soon after vowing to spend the rest of his life with her? Then again the morning after that night, when he’d told her to go?
He moved closer to her. Too close. ‘Since when have you known?’ The feral growl of his voice warned her that his anger was running on a short leash, desperate to break free. The day he’d walked out on their marriage he’d made it clear he’d never wanted to be married and most certainly had never wanted to be a father. She’d been convinced it was her casual mention of children that had tipped him over the edge. Now he glared up at her, as if to reaffirm all he’d said that day. As he glared up at her she was shocked by how anger glittered dangerously in his dark eyes.
‘About two weeks.’ As soon as she’d said it she knew it was a mistake. His eyes darkened to glacial black and his lips pressed into a firm line of fury.
‘Two weeks?’ The words echoed around the empty room and he looked directly into her eyes, so intimidatingly close. She’d never seen him this angry. ‘And you thought now was the perfect time to tell me what you knew? More to the point, how the hell did you find out?’
‘Find out?’ She stumbled over the answer, not understanding the question, but stood tall before him, refusing to be intimidated by his black mood. ‘I wanted to be sure.’
‘Be sure of what?’ He sat back and looked at her as if seeing her for the first time and a flutter of doubt crossed her mind. Was it possible he didn’t know? That she’d wrongly assumed that he did? Were they talking about two entirely different subjects? If so, what was so bad it had made him this angry?
There was no escaping it now, no easy way to break this. She had to tell him—right now. The suspicion in his eyes warned her of that.
‘Be sure of what, Lisa?’ Max demanded, the tension in the air ratcheting up, almost suffocating her.
‘I...’ She tried to form the words, but his jaw clenching in anger snared her attention and her words dried up.
‘What, Lisa?’ His voice thundered and inside she jumped as he stood up, tall, powerful and demanding.
The words failed her as she looked up at him, her heart thumping hard in her chest. She tried again. ‘I’m pregnant.’
* * *
Max’s world rocked violently. Not for the first time today he was unable to utter a single word in either English or his native Spanish. He’d thought she’d come to ensure he would sign the divorce papers, to tell him she’d moved on, had a new lover, but her words still ricocheted through him. Lisa was pregnant? His estranged wife, the woman he’d turned his back on, was carrying his child? A child he hadn’t wanted, a child he wasn’t ready for, not when everything from his past was thrusting into the present with the force of a tidal wave.
He focused his attention on the woman he’d married, the woman he’d never be able to love after learning at a young age that such emotions hurt. His mother had loved his father and that had hurt her—badly. He’d loved his father and when he’d walked out it had almost ripped him apart. He could still hear his harsh parting words echoing from the past, taunting him with the one thing he’d steadfastly refused to acknowledge since that day.
Never forget you have Valdez blood in your veins.
Ever since then he’d tried to forget. He’d been resolutely determined to have nothing to do with the might of the Valdez banking family. He’d been entirely successful until a lawyer had contacted him, informing him of his father’s death. Then his half-brother had done the same and now the whole sorry mess was splashed over every damn newspaper.
He pushed his childhood memories back, but didn’t take his eyes off Lisa as she stood there, holding her nerve, those green eyes locked with his. She was more than a match for him. The only woman he’d ever known who didn’t hang on his every word, didn’t simper and giggle in an act of coyness. Lisa was real and honest. She’d grounded him, made him believe he was worthy of more than one-night stands. Then she’d told him she’d had a job offer in America and he’d known he couldn’t let her walk away, that he had to try and open up to her, to love her.
That was why he’d married her, but very quickly he’d realised that had been a mistake. A big mistake. They didn’t belong together, they should never have married and he cursed the weakness of his desire for this redhead, which had driven him to make her his wife.
Finally he found his voice. ‘Pregnant? What about the pill?’
He couldn’t be a father. He didn’t want to be a father, didn’t want to take the risk that he’d be the same as his father, that the Valdez legacy would rear its ugly head. Now it had. In more ways than he could believe possible.
Lisa was pregnant. From one careless night. How could she calmly stand there and tell him as if it were just one of those things that happened?
‘I think you have some explaining to do.’ He growled the words at her, annoyed at her reluctance to say anything else.
She pulled out a chair and sat wearily at the table and he could clearly see just how pale she was beneath her make-up. Unease and worry threatened but he pushed them savagely away, along with the fear of the past, as he sat opposite her. She clasped her hands in front of her on the table. His gaze lingered on her long slender fingers and the glitter of the diamond engagement ring and band of gold he’d placed on her third finger over a year ago. She still wore his rings? Why, when the divorce papers he hadn’t yet signed were on his desk at home? Had she put them back on once she’d realised she was carrying his child?
‘We had a lot of wine that night, Max. I guess suffering the after-effects of that had an effect.’ She paused and looked at him. ‘It wasn’t something I even considered until I realised that I could be pregnant.’
Did she seriously think he’d buy that? Too much wine? ‘A few glasses of wine?’
‘It was more than a few and you know it.’ Her hot retort fired back at him, much more like the Lisa he knew, then she blushed, the colour bringing life to her cheeks. ‘I was ill after I left.’
He narrowed his eyes as he replayed that night in his mind and then the morning after. He recalled how his head had been splitting in two, how every noise had made him wince, especially the slam of the door as Lisa had left. He’d made several cups of coffee that morning before finally being able to drink one. She was right. They had drunk far too much wine. Or had that been a cover up for the sudden defrosting of his estranged wife? After all, she hadn’t needed much persuasion to return to his bed.
Max put one elbow on the table and pressed his hand over his eyes. Could life get any worse? He’d discovered a family he’d never known of, or even had any desire to know, after his father’s death. Now it was being played out through newspaper headlines, but, worse than any of that, he’d created a new generation to add to the Valdez family. One he did not want.
He looked down at various copies of today’s newspapers spread out on the table before him. Each headline different, but saying the same thing. He looked again at the newspaper on the top. His throat tightened as he read the headlines again. Bold black words screamed from the page, hurtling him into a past he’d rather forget, colliding wildly with a future he didn’t want.
Billionaire’s Illegitimate Heir Found!
‘Max?’ Lisa’s question sounded far off and he fought to get himself back under control, to be in charge of a situation that was escalating with alarming speed.
He couldn’t speak, couldn’t say anything to her, not after the way she’d deceived him—tricking him into being a father.
‘Max? What is it?’ She reached out and slowly pulled the newspaper round so that she could read it. He looked up and watched her lashes lower as she read the headlines, annoyed that his thoughts rushed back to the times he’d watched her sleep. To the morning, just moments before she’d left him. How could such a beautiful and beguiling woman be so deceitful? How could she do this to him? And why now?
She looked up at him, her soft green eyes full of shock. ‘This is about you. You have a brother?’
He pressed his lips firmly together. ‘A half-brother.’
In the same day he’d found his connection to Raul Valdez, the billionaire banking tycoon, had been plastered everywhere, he’d been told he was to be a father. Was he in the middle of a nightmare? If he opened his eyes would it all go away?
‘And you never knew?’ Lisa looked at him and he was certain she hadn’t known any of this. He could see so many questions in her eyes but was grateful that she didn’t ask them now. Hell, he didn’t even know the answer to any of them himself. All he could think about was that he’d done exactly what his birth father had done. He’d created a child he didn’t want.
‘No, but that is not important now. We need to discuss the baby.’ Saying that word made it so real it came out in a growl of harshness and he saw her sit back away from him as if he were the devil himself. He hadn’t wanted it to sound so cruel.
‘There is nothing to discuss.’ She pushed back her chair and stood up, forcing him to look up at her. ‘I’m going to have your baby, but you needn’t worry, I won’t make any demands on you whatsoever. You made it very clear when you walked out on our marriage that any kind of commitment is very much off the agenda for you.’
‘Sit down, Lisa.’
‘No.’ She buttoned up her coat and he knew if he didn’t get this right, didn’t say the right thing she would walk out on him—again. Only this time she would take with her his child, a child that would grow up wondering where in the world its father was and why he didn’t want them in his life. He knew only too well what that was like and didn’t want that pain, that rejection for his child.
‘We need to talk about this. Sit down, Lisa.’ Anger simmered in his voice and he bit down hard, stopping himself from saying anything else. Something that would make this even worse than it already was. He needed to sort things with Lisa, then he could deal with the other avalanche that had crashed into his life. His brother.
‘Why? So that you can tell me it’s not what you want and walk away from me again?’ The truth of her words stung. Just as the truth of the headlines smarted like salt in an open wound.
He wanted to demand to know why she’d let this happen, why after living apart yet working together professionally she had agreed to have dinner with him, turning it into a date, then a one-night stand. Inwardly, he savagely cursed. He’d been the one to invite her to dinner, the one to suggest that avoiding each other wasn’t professional. After all they were both shareholders, both had a stake in the club. Neither of them could just walk away.
‘I don’t want children and this is why.’ He picked up the newspaper and shook it, anger making his movements sharp. ‘It’s all here.’
‘You are not the only one to have had a bad childhood, Max.’ His gaze snapped to hers and the one and only time they’d discussed her childhood surfaced from his memory. The way she’d told him she’d hated the family arguments, especially at Christmas.
‘My point exactly.’ His reply was swift.
‘I am having this baby, Max, and, as I said, I expect nothing from you.’ Her chin lifted and her eyes glittered with defiance.
‘So you think you can just arrive here, today of all days, and tell me I am to be a father then walk away?’
‘The timing is bad, I admit.’ Her voice softened slightly, snagging at his senses, pulling at his conscience. ‘But I am having this baby, Max.’
‘And I intend to be there for my child, no matter what. It will not grow up thinking I cared so little I walked away.’ As he spoke he knew that it was the one and only thing he was certain of at the moment. If his brother wanted nothing to do with him and Lisa hated him, it didn’t matter. All that mattered was to be a part of his child’s life. But to do that he would have to be a part of Lisa’s life. He pushed the paper at her, stabbing coldly at the image of the father he could barely remember. ‘I will not be this man.’
* * *
‘No, Max, it’s not possible, not when you have already made it clear you don’t want me in your life.’ Lisa stepped back from Max, away from the temptation of reaching out to touch him, to go to him and soothe his pain. He was dealing with two life-changing things in one morning, but, from the cold expression on his face, neither had made any great impact other than to make him angry. He didn’t want a brother or a baby.
‘There wasn’t a baby involved then. My baby.’
‘And that changes things?’
‘You’re damn right it changes things.’
He glared at her and the sensation of being in control, of being able to drive the situation how she wanted, vanished as he looked at her. Only a small distance separated them but right now it felt like an ocean. Deep and unnavigable.
‘No, it doesn’t.’ Her life-long instinct to protect herself and stand up for herself, to fight her corner, kicked in. ‘I’m doing this on my own.’
‘No.’ That one word thundered around the room and she blinked in shock. She’d never seen Max so angry. Would she have told him about the baby if she’d known his reaction would be this bad? Yes, the answer fired back into her mind. She didn’t want him turning up when the child was older as her father had done, creating hell in an already dysfunctional family and giving her false hope of being wanted, of being rescued from the latest stepfather, a spiteful older stepbrother and uncaring mother who seemed only to want to make her feel useless.
‘What do you mean, no?’ she demanded hotly, the pain of her childhood almost too much in the emotional state she was in.
‘I mean we will remain married.’ He paused as his expression hardened further and she braced herself against what was to follow. ‘And we will live as a married couple.’
‘No. I don’t want to.’ Anger made her irrational. ‘I want a divorce.’
‘Divorce is not an option now, Lisa.’ His words had calmed, become laden with iciness. His expression was severe, his eyes dark and watchful.
She lifted her chin. ‘It is the only option for me.’
‘Not for me.’ Those words were hard and forceful.
‘Why?’ The response blurted from her as if it had been catapulted across the room. He didn’t flinch at the accusation firmly loaded within it.
‘Because I will not be the man my father was.’ His mood softened and he moved toward her, the man she’d fallen in love with showing through the tough façade like an echo of a ghost. ‘I will not abandon my child because it doesn’t fit in with my life.’
All her past pain from her childhood melted away and her heart went out to him; the pain was so clear in his voice. Whatever had happened she’d loved this man, even if he’d destroyed that with his coldness that morning two months ago. She had once loved him enough to marry him and promise to be there for him in good times and bad. Didn’t that count for something?
Marriage for ever was something she’d dreamt of as a young girl, yearned for as a young woman, and then she’d met Max. He’d swept her off her feet, made her feel special, wanted and very much desired. He’d never told her he loved her, no matter how many times she’d said it to him, but when he’d asked her to be his wife, that hadn’t mattered. She’d had enough love for both of them.
Only she hadn’t, she thought as she watched him press the pads of his fingers over his eyes in an uncustomary display of inadequacy. Her heart lurched as she weakened. This was her baby’s father, the man she’d fallen in love with, the man she’d married.
‘I understand why you are saying that,’ she said more softly now as she moved closer, physically bridging the gap if not emotionally. ‘But we shouldn’t make any decisions now. Not until you have met your brother. This is too much to deal with in one go.’
‘You’re right,’ he said firmly and looked up at her. ‘First I will meet my brother and then we will sort this out.’
He made their baby sound as if it were a little mistake that could be swept to one side, but she kept her nerve, hid her pain and looked him in the eye. ‘So when are you going to meet him?’
‘He’s here now.’ The curtness of his reply shocked her as much as what he’d said.
‘Here?’
‘No, in London. We have a meeting planned for today.’
‘And he thought it would be a good idea to blast it all over the British papers on the very same day?’ Furious loyalty suddenly sprang up inside her and she couldn’t keep the spike of venom from her voice. What kind of man would do such a thing?
‘I’ve read it over several times and I don’t think he is responsible. He would be dragging his own name through the dirt too. He’s been accused of blackmailing a woman into an engagement. Maybe by meeting him I will discover just who is responsible for this.’ He picked up the newspaper again and glared at it.
‘So you are going?’ She frowned at what he’d just told her, the puzzle over who would gain from leaking such a story taking her mind from her own problems.
‘Yes, but first we have things to sort out.’
‘What things?’ She curled her fingers together; the engagement ring she’d picked out with such enthusiasm and hope for the future cut cruelly into her palm as it turned on her finger. Was that a sign they were doomed? Whatever duty and honour kept them together?
‘Our marriage. How we are going to make this work.’
‘Our marriage is over, Max.’ She didn’t dare mention that once she’d loved him so much she’d thought nothing could ever change that. If she mentioned the word love now it would push her over the edge, even if it didn’t do that to him.
‘Not until I return the signed papers saying I agree to the divorce and right now I have no intention of doing that.’
