Читать книгу From One Night to Wife - Rachael Thomas, Rachael Thomas - Страница 9

CHAPTER TWO

SERENA WAS SPEECHLESS. She blinked rapidly as if seeing Nikos for the first time. What did he mean? Her head began to swim as she tried to process what he was saying and she cursed her pregnancy-induced emotions, biting back hard against the urge to dissolve into frustrated tears.

This wasn’t going at all to plan. She hadn’t expected him to welcome her with open arms—not after his parting words—but the discovery of his deceit and his determination to overrule her was totally unexpected.

‘You let me think you were an island fisherman. One who shouldn’t have anything more to tell.’

She’d known coming back to Santorini wouldn’t give her all she really wanted, but never in all her wildest dreams had she imagined this scenario.

She looked at Nikos again, searching for the man she’d fallen in love with. The man who’d set light to the undiscovered woman inside her, capturing her heart and body.

‘Why?’ she asked simply.

‘It was for the best at the time.’ Each word was firm and decisive, his face a mask of composure.

‘I will remove each and every one to get what I want. My child. My heir.’

His words of warning echoed in her head like a haunting melody. It seemed that no matter how much she’d tried to be different from her parents, wanting only to have a happy family, she was heading down the same path.

Her parents had been forced to stay together by an unplanned pregnancy, a mistake. She had grown up carrying the guilt of being that mistake, knowing she had forced her parents to stay together. She was the reason they’d fought, the reason they hated each other now. She didn’t want her child to suffer the same guilt because of the mistake she and Nikos had made.

‘I am an island fisherman.’

He stepped towards her, his voice softer now, but instinct told her not to let her guard drop, that trouble was brewing.

‘But I am also a businessman. My office is in Piraeus and I live in Athens.’

‘So what were you doing on the island? Using the guise of a fisherman to lure women and bolster your ego?’ She couldn’t stop the words from rushing at him.

He glared at her. ‘Fishing was my grandfather’s trade, his business. I help out with the fleet that he started. And knowing your background I wasn’t going to disclose anything personal to you.’

‘My background?’ She was completely at a loss as to what he meant.

‘You are a journalist, are you not?’

She tried hard to process what he was telling her, but couldn’t understand why he’d kept the truth from her. Was it really because she had studied journalism? Did he really fear that? Or was it simply that he hadn’t wanted her to know who he was?

‘Why did you feel the need to hide it from me, Nikos?’ She couldn’t imagine the life Nikos really led. It was too far removed from the man she’d met, the man she’d fallen in love with. He was shattering every dream she’d had of him. ‘Why were you even here, masquerading as a fisherman?’

‘My life changed when I left the island, and my fortunes with it.’ He looked at her, his eyes glacial and hard, his expression unyielding. ‘Every year since, I’ve spent two weeks helping the small fleet of fisherman here on the island. It’s a way of staying connected to my grandparents. And you didn’t ask questions—which made a change.’

‘A change from what?’ He wasn’t making sense—or was it her jumbled emotions? She was tired. Thinking coherently wasn’t easy, but she forced her mind to concentrate.

‘From women wanting all they can get from me—financially and emotionally. It appears you are not different after all.’

‘You lied—you hid the truth—because you were afraid I’d want more?’ The words rushed from her before she could hold them back and his eyes narrowed in response, his mouth setting into an irritated line of hardness.

The stark question he’d fired at her earlier came back, its full meaning now painfully clear.

‘How much?’

That was what he’d said when she’d told him she only wanted one thing from him. It hadn’t made any sense. Now it hit her. He thought she wanted money from him—or worse still, that she’d deliberately got pregnant to give the baby to Sally.

Sickness rose up and her head spun. What kind of man was he?

‘Why didn’t you tell me when we were together?’ She hurled the question at him, her knees becoming ever weaker with shock as nausea threatened to take over.

‘What we shared...’ He took her hands in his and she hated the way her pulse leapt at his touch, counteracting all the pain and turmoil of moments before. ‘It was something special. But it was never destined to be more than a holiday romance, a passing affair.’

He was right about that, at least. She had wished and hoped for more, but deep down had known it would finish once she’d left the island and returned to her life. What she hadn’t known was that he too would leave the island and go back to his life. A life he’d kept from her because he’d believed she was after his money or the scoop of a big story.

She pulled her hands from his slowly and shook her head in despair. ‘It doesn’t mean we can raise a child together, Nikos. Money isn’t everything.’

* * *

Fury seeped through Nikos’s veins like poison, mixing with memories of the day his mother had walked away and left him. Serena’s words, although calmly said, screamed inside his head. What was she saying? What plans had she been making for their child whilst he’d been living in ignorance of its existence?

‘It still sounds very much as if you are considering giving my baby away.’ Incredulity made his tone sharper than a blade.

‘That is absurd.’

She met his accusation head-on, looking determined to do battle and defend herself. And he knew for certain that there could only be one reason. He’d exposed her plans before she’d had a chance to knock him sideways with the idea, but all it had done was make him ever more certain that he would be there for his child—not just now and again, but all the time.

‘You have more than implied it.’

He clenched his hands into tight fists, resisting the need to reach for her, to hold her arms and force her to look him in the eye and tell him the truth.

‘We can’t sort this out now—not when you are jumping to such outrageous conclusions.’

She looked at him tempestuously and her green eyes met his, but his usual accuracy in reading a person had deserted him. He couldn’t see lies or truth, but he did see something else in them. The same fiery passion he’d seen three months ago—which had been his undoing.

He stepped closer to her...so close he could smell the sweetness of her perfume. He battled with his memories of their time together as the scent of summer flowers invaded his senses, light and floral, evoking more memories he’d do better to bury. But he couldn’t. This woman, the only one who’d made him want more than a brief affair, was in reality no better than his mother. Worse, in fact. She wanted to abandon her child, and she expected him to do the same.

‘Nikos, we have to be practical. The baby will grow up in England—with me.’

Never. The word resounded in his head. Never.

He ignored the pleading edge to her voice, wondering if she thought he’d meekly accept that. Would she really be a mother to his child? Or had she planned all along to give her baby away?

His thoughts returned to his mother with unnerving clarity. Had she been being practical when she’d walked away? Had she given her six-year-old son a thought as she’d left, preferring to escape with her lover, to the bright city lights and her modelling career, instead of remaining on the island with the man she’d married?

Nikos tried to push back the demons that had haunted him since that day. The woman who’d given birth to him didn’t know him—just as he didn’t know her. He might have passed her on the streets of Athens, or any other city he’d visited for business, and not known. All he knew was that despite her attempts to contact him since he’d turned sixteen he’d written her out of his life.

He looked at Serena, the woman he might have loved if things had been different—if his past hadn’t convinced him he was incapable of love or being loved.

‘No.’

The word was fired harshly from him like a bullet and, precisely aimed, it found its mark. Serena’s eyes widened in surprise and those long lashes blinked rapidly in confusion. Did she have to be so beautiful? So compelling even in the heat of this war she’d waged?

‘You can’t just say no. We haven’t sorted anything.’

She looked beseechingly up at him, searching his face, and he took a deep breath as memories of kissing those soft lips avalanched over him. Did she know the effect she was having on him? Did she realise that right at this moment he couldn’t think past what they’d had, those passionate moments they’d shared in the summer?

The waves rushed to the shore with a normality that stunned him. Apparently they were not aware of the horrendous situation unfolding on the sand. The lights of the small town glowed like stars around them and he found his past colliding with the present, becoming inseparable.

‘How can I trust you not to abandon my child to your sister after what you said?’

His voice was an angry growl, and he fought hard against the rage of emotions that forged through him. All his life he’d carried the hurt of total rejection by the one woman who should have loved him unconditionally.

‘I’m not abandoning my child to anyone—not even to you.’

For a moment he thought he saw pain flash in her eyes, thought he saw the agony of it on her face, but it was gone in an instant. Hard lines of determination replaced it.

‘Telling me we can’t raise this child together after saying your sister is desperate for a baby sounds very much like you are planning just that.’

He moved back from her, not trusting the rage that had become like the rush of a river in flood. All the childhood doubts he’d successfully locked away were now out and running riot.

‘How can you even think of doing such a thing?’

‘How can you even think that?’ She gasped out the pained words. ‘I want this child. I want to give it everything I possibly can.’

The conviction in her voice struck a raw nerve. ‘As do I.’

‘Can you really give our child all it needs when you admit you don’t want to be a father?’

She moved towards him, her hand momentarily reaching out to him, but he flinched from her touch, his raw emotions making coherent thought difficult.

How could she doubt he would give his child all it needed? The idea of being a father was one that he had always savagely dismissed because it would entail marriage—something he’d proved he’d be unable to commit to—but now he was presented with the reality he knew exactly what he wanted.

‘A child needs love.’

Vehemently the words rushed from him, and he was annoyed at her ability to take away his composure, his control. He knew more than most that a child needed love. It was all he’d craved as a young boy. But could he be a father? Could he love his child? His father hadn’t been able to and his mother never had. She’d admitted that as she’d left. How could he be any different from them?

Serena laughed—a soft, nervous laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. He bit down hard, clenching his teeth, trying to stop harsh words rushing out.

‘Can you really do that, Nikos?’

His silence seemed to answer her question and she ploughed on with her own arguments for being a single parent.

‘Can you love a child you don’t want?’

‘Do not question my ability to be a father,’ he growled, hardly able to contain his anger.

‘A child needs stability, a loving home. It doesn’t matter if it’s with one parent or two, so long as it has all it needs.’

Strength sounded in her voice and her face was full of determination as she looked into his eyes, challenging him with everything she had.

‘I’ve already made it clear that is not a problem.’ He knew his voice had turned to a low growl, full of anger, but her constant referral to his inability to provide for his child was more than he could take.

‘It’s your deceit, Nikos, that has made me think you can’t.’ Her face was stern as she looked at him. ‘Your lies haven’t changed anything just as your real identity hasn’t. I will not allow my baby to become a possession to be bargained over. Least of all by you.’

‘After your scheme to get pregnant you are not in a position to make demands on me.’

He felt the reins of control slipping, felt her gaining the moral high ground—especially now haunting images from his childhood were being rapidly unleashed.

‘That is so far from the truth,’ she retaliated hotly, then moved towards him, her voice softening. ‘This wasn’t planned, at all, and I cannot even consider giving away my baby.’

Suddenly he was a young boy again, standing on this very beach, looking out to sea, hoping the next boat that came in would have his mother on board, that she would change her mind and come home. He’d watched and waited for many years, before finally dismissing her from his mind, his thoughts and his heart. She was a cold and heartless woman and he’d accepted the fact that he’d never see her again.

‘But you want money?’

‘Nikos, this isn’t about money. I believed you couldn’t afford to raise a child—just as I can’t. It doesn’t mean I’m not going to try, though. I hadn’t planned on having a child, but I am certainly going to be there for him or her—all the time.’

Him or her. Suddenly the child she carried had gained an identity, an image in his mind. It would either be a little girl, with flame-red hair like her mother’s, or a little boy with a cheeky smile and plenty of attitude.

Then her words sank into his mind. Had she really thought he couldn’t afford to raise his child? The niggling suspicion that she’d known who he really was resurfaced. It wouldn’t have been hard for her to source information about him on the internet. His business acumen made him a much talked of man—as did his single status. He didn’t believe she’d only just found out.

She reached out for him again and he resisted the urge to draw back, strangely wanting to feel the heat of her touch.

‘I am having this baby, Nikos. With or without you.’

He snapped back his arm, suddenly not wanting to be touched by her after all, not wanting the hot sizzle that sparked through him to take over.

That was one thing he had to control: he couldn’t desire her.

* * *

Serena’s heart sank as he pulled away from her. He hated her touch, and the anger in his eyes worried her. Whatever else had gone before, and whatever was to come, they had created a new life together. They had to find a way to give their baby the best. Which meant agreeing on how that was to be done.

Images unwittingly filled her mind. Nikos at her side as she held a baby, its hair as dark as his and with the same deep blue eyes looking up at her.

The image of happiness ripped her heart in two. That kind of happy-ever-after was what she’d wished for herself as a child. She’d wanted nothing more than for her parents to be happy together, and most of all she wished they’d wanted her, their youngest child. Instead she’d had to face the reality that she’d been a sudden and unexpected addition to the family—one that had put pressure on the cracks that had already been showing between her parents.

‘Where do you propose the baby grows up?’ Nikos moved closer, his barely concealed annoyance clearly evident.

‘With me.’ Desperation echoed in every word and she saw him inhale deeply, holding on to the anger her words had provoked.

‘In England?’

The syllables of his words were broken, the sound staccato and harsh. She swallowed as she looked at him— anything else would show a weakness, one he’d exploit fully.

‘Yes.’

Serena thought of all the heartache her sister had endured, the number of times she’d hoped for a baby and the number of times her dreams had come crashing down. She had indeed discussed it with Nikos, and couldn’t believe he was now using it against her.

It was a really cruel twist of fate that it was her who’d fallen pregnant—and from just one night of unprotected sex. But it had been more than that—for her at least. That last evening on the secluded beach they’d walked hand in hand as the sun had set and shared a gentle kiss. It had rekindled the fire of passion they’d experienced in her small hotel room.

She reminded herself that from the outset Nikos had made it clear he didn’t consider theirs a lasting romance, but one that would end when she went home. She’d gone along with the idea, feeling secure in the knowledge that she could walk away, that it didn’t have to be more. But she’d fallen hopelessly in love with Nikos.

That night, as they’d reached the seclusion of the edge of the beach, surrounded by rocks and caves, he’d kissed her so passionately they hadn’t been able to stop. The urgency of their desire had forced them down onto the cool sand, but nothing had prepared her for his reaction afterwards—those cold words of dismissal, the demand that he should know if ‘consequences’ resulted. Well, they had.

‘So you would see our child grow up, hear its first words, watch its first steps, while I would be relegated to the background, lucky to catch a glimpse of it before it becomes a teenager?’

His voice brought her rapidly back to the present, and she swallowed down the lump in her throat as tears once again threatened.

The accusation in his tone speared her conscience and she wondered, not for the first time, if she really could do this alone. She’d thought his harsh words on the beach, after they’d made love in such an explosive and spontaneous way, had left her with little choice. He’d as good as told her he had no wish to be a father—that the very idea was abhorrent to him.

‘Don’t try and make it sound like you want this baby, Nikos.’ She almost hissed the words at him. ‘Not when you told me so coldly that you wanted to know of any “consequences.”’

‘Being a father is not something I had planned.’

He moved away from her, raking his long tanned fingers through his hair, and she sensed his frustration with every nerve in her body.

‘Which is why I will return to England and bring up our baby alone.’

She seized on his declaration before he could say anything else, but thoughts of telling her sister almost choked her. How could she tell a woman who wanted a child so desperately that she had made a mistake? That she now had that most desired thing? How could she destroy her sister like that?

Anger sparked from his eyes, making her step back away from him, her footsteps faltering in the sand as she stumbled. Before she knew what had happened she was in his arms. The breath seemed to be sucked from her body as the all too familiar scent of Nikos invaded every part of her, setting free yet more memories.

She bit down on her lower lip, anxiety making her brow furrow and her breathing quicken as she looked up at him. His unusual blue eyes sparked with a fiery mix of anger and desire, making her stomach flutter.

‘I might not have planned to be a father, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to turn my back on my child.’

His words made her heart beat faster, and again the idea of living happily ever after with him flashed before her. Then it was gone, drowned by the reality of their situation. How could they possibly raise a child together? How could they ever be happy after his cold disregard and his lies to conceal his true identity?

She shook her head. ‘It will never work, Nikos. Never.’

His hold on her arm tightened, his fingers pressing into her as he pulled her close. She could feel his breath on her face and fought hard against the overwhelming need to close her eyes and press her lips to his. It was as if she’d stepped back in time, back to the first moment they had met, to the spark of attraction that had leapt to life between them instantly.

She became aware of her phone ringing inside her small handbag and the magic around them evaporated, disappearing to leave stark reality. He let go of her, stepped back, his eyes hard and narrowed, full of suspicion. As the phone ceased its insistent ring an ominous silence settled around them, one so heavy that even the waves seemed to have quietened, stilling in anticipation of what was to come next.

‘I am not allowing my child to be brought up in another country. My child will be raised to know its Greek heritage, its Greek family and most importantly its father.’

Each calmly spoken word caressed her face, and even if he’d spoken in Greek she’d have been sure they were words of passion. But she wasn’t fooled—they were words of control.

‘So where do I fit into that?’ She pulled back from him, needing the space to think.

‘That is what you must decide.’ Again it was said in an almost seductive whisper.

‘And if I want to go back to England?’ The question came out as an unexpected hoarse whisper, the pain of it hurting so much.

‘Then you must do so—once the child has been born, here in Greece, where it will remain.’

She gasped in disbelief. ‘You can’t force me to stay. Or expect me to leave without my baby.’

Who was this man? Where had the man she’d fallen in love with gone? This cold, hard and angry man was a total stranger.

‘I’m not forcing you to do anything. The choice is yours.’

‘No, Nikos.’ She stood tall, strength rising up through her. Although she really didn’t want her child to grow up with just one parent. She wanted her baby to have all that onlookers thought she’d had: two loving and happy parents.

‘We will, of course, have to be married.’

He glared at her, hostility emanating from the blue depths of his eyes, and she was thankful they weren’t having this conversation in daylight. She didn’t want to see the full force of that hostility. At least now it was masked by the quickly descending darkness.

Her phone began to ring again, and her heart hammered loudly as he glanced down at her bag.

‘Perhaps you should answer that.’

‘No. I can’t.’

It was all she could manage as the full implications of what he’d just said hit home. Was she referring to the phone or to marriage? She had no idea, and the words he’d said raced inside her head, confusing her further.

They would have to be married.

* * *

Exasperation mixed with fury and fizzed inside Nikos, threatening to explode as he looked down at Serena. Her gorgeous red hair, blown by the warm wind across her face, had created a veil—one she could partially hide behind as she glared back up at him.

‘What do you mean, no?’

Nikos thought of the deal he was about to close for the cruise liner company and the effort he’d put into it. Now, trying to reason with Serena, he realised that the deal was a picnic in the sun compared to the negotiation of this deal and what was at stake. His child—something he’d never thought he’d have because he’d never allowed himself to want the impossible. He couldn’t turn and walk away now. If he did he’d be worse, far worse, than his mother and father.

‘I don’t know...’ she said, shaking her head.

Damn the woman—she was forcing him to strike a deal for his child.

‘Well, you’d better think fast.’

He watched her face, saw the ever-changing expressions, holding her captive with his glare.

‘Did you ever consider marriage when we had our romantic fling in the summer? Our holiday affair?’

Her voice was sharp and strong, but it was her pale face that told him she was having as much difficulty with this as he was. So she should. What woman would consider giving away her child? One just like his mother.

‘You don’t even love me.’

‘Love has nothing to do with it.’ He moderated his tone, aware of his anger rising once more.

‘So why do we have to get married?’ The disbelief in her voice was more than clear.

‘Marriage has never been on my agenda.’

That much was true. After living in the shadow of his parents’ marital breakdown he’d written that idea off as a young man, preferring to enjoy the company of woman without complication and commitment. He only sought the pleasure of a woman’s company for fun. Purely carnal. Nothing more. Which was exactly what he’d been doing with Serena during her stay on the island.

‘And being a father?’

She dropped the question so lightly between them he almost didn’t hear it.

‘I will be a father to my child.’ He evaded her question and the truth that lay buried within him. He wanted to be a father—to have his child grow up in a world of love and happiness—but he was sceptical that such happiness actually existed.

‘Make no mistake, Serena. My child will not be shuffled between countries like an unwanted Christmas present.’