Читать книгу Tempted By The Wrong Twin - Rachel Bailey - Страница 10
ОглавлениеThe next night, Nick left for Harper’s place with a bit of time to spare. He wanted to get her something, a token to show he was acting in good faith while they tried to work things through. Besides, she was in a tough place—pregnant with twins and thinking she had to leave Texas to get the support she needed. At least he could show her she was wrong about the last part.
He wanted a small gift, just to show he was here, ready to play his part. He’d heard some men bought their wives or partners jewelry when they became pregnant, but from the way Harper had reacted during their talk last night, he guessed a gift that expensive would overwhelm her. He just needed something to make her smile. Maybe he could start with flowers?
He ducked into the local grocery store and was confronted with rows and rows of buckets overflowing with blooms. And he hit the snag in his plan. In his experience, most women had a favorite flower, but he knew so little about Harper that he had no chance guessing. Sure, he knew more than he had twenty-four hours ago, but there were certain things that a man should know about the woman who was carrying his babies. Starting with her favorite flower...
“Daddeee!” The sweet, familiar voice rang out and his heart melted into a puddle. He turned in time to catch his three-year-old in the air as she launched herself at him.
“Hey, beautiful girl,” he said, squeezing her tight against his chest.
She leaned in to whisper in his ear. “Can you have dinner wiv us tonight?”
When she leaned back to see his face, her eyes were huge with entreaty, and it killed him to have to say no. Her mother, Melissa, and Melissa’s fiancé wouldn’t welcome him into their house, so even if he hadn’t had plans with Harper, he would have to decline.
He glanced around, and sure enough, Melissa and Guy stood about ten feet away, both holding various grocery items, and neither smiling.
“Aw, baby, that’s probably not a good idea. But I’ll see you this weekend. How about we go to the park this time?”
Immediately distracted, Ellie nodded. “The big one wiv the swings?”
He grinned. “That’s the one.”
“I love you, Daddy,” she whispered, gripping his neck tight.
“I love you, too, Ellie.”
“Flowers. Are you going on a date, Nick?” Melissa was closer now. “You know I don’t want girlfriends around Ellie. It’s too disruptive for her. And my lawyer agrees.”
Nick stifled the retort that sat on his tongue. He was perfectly capable of working out what was and wasn’t good for his daughter. But getting into an argument in front of Ellie was definitely something that wouldn’t be good for her.
“Nice to see you, Melissa.” He tipped his chin at the other man. “Guy.”
“I mean it, Nick,” Melissa said, undeterred.
“You know what?” her smarmy fiancé said. “How about you go ahead and do it, and we’ll have a much stronger custody case. Ellie tells us everything anyway.”
Despite the pressure building in his head, Nick refused to rise to the bait. He gave Ellie another squeeze and put her down. “I’d love to stay and chat some more, but I have to go.” He grabbed the closest bunch of flowers, said, “See you soon, baby,” to his daughter, gave the adults a tight smile and headed for the checkout.
A few minutes later, he slid into the driver’s seat of his car and paused before starting the engine. His lawyer had given him similar advice about women—if he was trying to prove that he was a stable influence in Ellie’s life, then a parade of girlfriends would work against him. That had been such a nonissue at the time, he’d barely paid attention. But now...
...now a woman he barely knew was carrying his twins.
He didn’t have to run it by his lawyer to know that this would make him look irresponsible. And, as Malcolm had said, there were no secrets in Royal with Maverick on the loose, so Melissa could find out any day. Added to the PTSD he’d struggled with since his last deployment, it might be enough for the judge to award full custody of Ellie to her mother instead of the shared custody he was asking for. He couldn’t go on with only a day every two weeks with his daughter. His lungs squeezed tight.
He had to do something.
Something to make him look more stable.
He ran through scenario after scenario, but, really, there was only one solution.
If he and Harper were married, not only would he avoid any appearance of irresponsibility, but, in the judge’s eyes, he’d have a stable family unit to offer Ellie. Turning a negative into a positive.
The more he thought about it, marriage would not only help him with the custody case, it would also keep Harper here in Royal so he could be involved in the babies’ lives. It was a win-win.
But could he do it? Marry a woman who was practically a stranger? Could he convince her to do it?
Movement at the front of the store caught his attention. Ellie danced around Melissa’s legs as they made their way out the door and toward their car. His heart thumped hard. He’d do anything for that little girl. And he already felt the same about being a part of the twins’ lives, too. For all three children, he’d do anything. Even marry someone he didn’t love.
Decision made, he started the engine. Now he just had to convince Harper.
Glad he’d allowed extra time, he drove by the Texas Cattleman’s Club, where he’d made the reservation for dinner tonight. A few extra touches would help when he proposed. At this stage all he had going for him was that he and Harper had enough chemistry to light the city, so he wanted to do anything extra he could to sway the odds in his favor. It wasn’t much, but he’d been on missions with less auspicious beginnings. He’d make it work.
On the way in, he heard his name and turned to see the tall, solid form of Gabe Walsh stepping out of his car. Gabe was a former special agent with the FBI who now ran the Walsh Group, his family’s private security firm. Before Gabe had taken over, the Walsh Group had bought their body armor from Tate Armor, and Nick was loath to lose their business. One of the proposals he was working on now was the first one for TWG with Gabe at the helm.
“Walsh,” Nick said, waiting until the other man reached him, and then shaking his hand.
“Not often we see you out and about, Tate. Is this a special occasion?”
For a long moment, Nick considered telling him about Harper and the babies, trying to make it sound like casual chat, but really letting him know early in case Maverick released the information. At least that way it wouldn’t look like a security breach; instead, it would just be old news.
But, in reality, there was no way to announce such large personal news to a work acquaintance in a parking lot and make it sound natural. And Gabe had been in law enforcement—dropping something like that with no context would make him suspicious.
So, instead, he worked the other angle. “Just checking on a reservation. Hey, have you been looking into Maverick?”
Gabe’s head cocked to the side. “You know something?”
“Actually, I was hoping you would.”
Gabe winced. “Nothing. But I sure would love to know who it is.”
“You and everyone in town.” They reached the front doors, and both men stopped. Nick thrust his hand out, and Gabe shook it. “Good to see you. I’ll have that proposal to you in the next few days.”
“Looking forward to it.” Gabe went through the doors, and Nick let out a breath.
If there was about to be a breakthrough on the case, Gabe Walsh would know about it—he had connections everywhere. Which meant the situation with Harper was ripe for Maverick to milk or try to blackmail him over. The only way forward was to neutralize the potential threat before Maverick acted on it.
And that brought Nick back to the one way to resolve the situation on all fronts.
He had to marry Harper Lake.
* * *
Harper glanced across at Nick as he sat on the other side of their relatively secluded table at the restaurant in the Texas Cattleman’s Club. The table had the same crisp white tablecloth, sparking crystal glassware and thick, luxurious napkins as the others, but theirs definitely had something extra. To start with, there was the cascading arrangement of tiny white roses, and gold cutlery instead of silver on the other tables. And Nick had arrived to pick her up with a bouquet of pink lilies, which she’d put in a vase before they’d left. It all gave her a sinking feeling that Nick was pulling out all the stops. And she was going to tell him she was leaving anyway...
She’d been thinking about tonight almost constantly since he’d walked out her door twenty-four hours ago, and knew Nick would try to use their dinner to convince her to stay, so she’d decided to share one of her deepest fears with him, to be completely up front about why she had to go. Maybe then he’d understand—even if he didn’t like it—and wouldn’t make it more difficult than it already was.
At the very least, she owed him an explanation of why she wouldn’t risk staying and failing. Afterward, they could work out visitation arrangements and do their best to ensure the babies had a relationship with their father.
But she had a feeling Nick wasn’t going to make it easy to leave him.
She glanced at him now, the strong column of his throat emerging from the collar of his charcoal dress shirt, his mouth that she knew from experience could take her to heaven, dark eyes that were smoldering as they watched her... She tore her gaze away and looked down at her place setting. Leaving this man would never be easy.
In the car, as if by unspoken consent, they’d tabled the discussion about their situation and instead talked about the town and people they both knew. But now they were at the restaurant, and Harper didn’t want to put it off any longer. She needed to let him know where she stood before he started his pitch.
“Nick,” she began then paused to find some air for her lungs. “This is not how I pictured having my first baby.”
“It’s not how I pictured having my second and third, but we can make it work.” He seemed so sure, so confident he could make things right, and that broke her heart.
A waiter brought the two glasses of sparkling water they’d ordered, and Harper took a sip, both to help her dry mouth and to wait until they were alone again to resume the conversation.
“I need to explain something.” She tucked her hair behind her ear and met his gaze. “I grew up in a broken home. My mother did a great job, but some experiences will leave a mark. I made a vow that I’d never subject a child to the same pain, confusion and self-blame that I felt growing up.”
He cocked his head to the side, surveying her. “You don’t come across as someone who’s riddled with doubts.”
“How do I come across?” she asked, despite herself. She didn’t want to be sidetracked, but she was suddenly very interested in his opinion of her.
“When Malcolm talked about our attorney, he always said you were a go-getter. Someone who doesn’t back down for anyone or anything. Of course, I didn’t connect you to the person he was talking about until last night, but I’d have to say my initial assessment of you is the same.”
That was the image she’d tried to project. More than that, it was the person she’d worked hard to become. But life was always more complicated than that.
She shrugged one shoulder. “Appearances can be deceiving. The tough persona is an invisible armor I developed against being abandoned and rejected.” She hesitated, unsure how far to expose herself. But it was fair that he knew, that he understood. Despite her body wanting to fold itself up into a ball, she straightened her spine and went on. “It started back when my father left. The night he went, he was angry, maybe it was defensive, I don’t know, but he took it out on me as well as my mother. My last memories of him are him yelling at me in our living room then walking out the door.”
And despite the yelling, she’d followed him and thrown herself on the lawn outside, sobbing as his car drove away. She closed her eyes for long moments, trying to contain the emotions the memory always stirred up. The only sound was the clink of dishes from other tables and a low hum of distant conversation. She was almost scared to open her eyes in case she’d said too much. Given too much information too soon.
But she did open them and found Nick’s understanding gaze resting on her.
He drew in a deep breath. “God, Harper.”
She shook her head. “Believe me, I’m not telling you this for sympathy. In fact I haven’t told a soul that story before.”
“Then why are you telling me?” he asked.
“The thing is, that night triggered something for me. I don’t handle abandonment well, and I’ve never been able to move past it.” In fact, she’d been repeating the pattern through poor choices in men, dating guys who turned out to be commitment-shy to say the least. And so the cycle had continued. Being aware of what she was doing hadn’t helped her stop it. “Knowing how debilitating fears like that can be and how instability when you’re young can have lifelong effects, I’ve always wanted my children to only know the love and security of an intact family unit. That’s not an option now, but I still need to do the best I can to make the household they grow up in secure.”
“You don’t have to leave to get that. We can do that right here.”
“I’ll never keep them from you, Nick. I know how tough it can be to be separated from family members. But these babies are going to need a stable unit around them. You and I can try to work something out, but let’s be realistic. We’ve just met.”
“Sure, we just met,” he said, gaze not faltering. “But we’re not your garden variety of strangers. We’re expecting babies together, Harper. Unusual circumstances call for unusual measures.”
His reasoning was compelling, but still...
She lifted the spoon in her place setting and turned it in her fingers as she composed her thoughts, then lined it up neatly with the other cutlery again. “I wasn’t ready for one baby, let alone two, and I know I’ll have trouble coping with two babies with absolutely no experience. My mother will be there for us. Full-time. I’m really sorry, but the right thing for these babies is for me to move back to Connecticut.”
The waiter came by and, after telling them the specials, took their order. Once he left, Nick picked up the conversational thread again.
“I appreciate you telling me that. It couldn’t have been easy.” He squared his shoulders. “And I’ll be as honest with you in return. You need to know that I have post-traumatic stress disorder from my time in the Middle East, and I’ve pretty much been living as a hermit since I got back. But I’m changing things.” Frown lines appeared across his forehead. “I need to change things. My ex-wife is getting remarried, and she wants me to sign over my parental rights to our three-year-old daughter.”
“That’s crazy,” Harper said, her lawyer’s sense of justice kicking in. “Why would she want to keep a father and child from seeing each other?”
He speared his fingers through his hair. “She’s claiming my PTSD is making me an unfit father.”
“Is it?” she asked and tried not to hold her breath as she waited for the answer.
“No.” His voice was clear and sure. “I might be screwing up a heap of things in my life, but Ellie isn’t one of them. I’d do anything for her. Plus, she needs her father. She needs me. But—” he winced “—having two babies on the way with someone I’m not in a relationship with will probably damage my case.”
“Oh, Nick.” She hadn’t thought the situation could be any more complex. She’d been wrong.
“There’s something else we need to consider. With Maverick active and causing people real grief, this is a secret that may be released at an inopportune time.”
Maverick. She hadn’t even considered herself a possible target before—there had been nothing juicy enough in her life to interest him—but now she was just the sort of target he seemed to like. “If he announces that I’m pregnant by the boss, it would reflect badly on Tate Armor. It has the whiff of a workplace tinged by sexual harassment.”
“Worse than that. The breach of privacy itself would make the company look like we don’t know what we’re doing in the security field.”
“Of course,” she said, running through the ramifications. “So we need to tell people ourselves soon so we’re controlling the information.”
“Ideally, yes. And if we ensure that everything looks unquestionably aboveboard, all the better.”
“How can we do that?”
“The way I see it, we have a few problems that have arisen from this pregnancy. You’re feeling overwhelmed and in need of backup. You also want an intact family unit for the babies. And I have to consider that I’ll look irresponsible when my custody case is heard. And finally, Tate Armor’s reputation is at risk.”
She winced. “That does sound like a lot when you list everything out.”
“I’ve thought about this, and I see one solution that addresses all of these problems.”
“That must be a pretty powerful solution.”
“It is.” He rolled his shoulders back. “We should get married.”
She coughed out a laugh. “Are you serious?”
“Very much. Think about it—you’d have my commitment that I’ll be in this with you one hundred percent. You’ll have all the backup you need without having to leave town. A hands-on father is the only way I know how to do it, anyway. The babies get two parents. Our relationship would look like a positive in my court case. And Tate Armor would be safe from Maverick. Everybody wins.”
Everybody wins?
“Nick, we don’t even know each other.” It seemed like a point too obvious to say, but apparently it did need to be said aloud. Maybe this was the one detail he hadn’t factored into his solution?
He tilted his head, conceding the point. “And if this was a first date, that would be a reasonable objection. But you’re having my babies.” His entire body stilled, but his eyes blazed with focus. “Marry me.”
She leaned back in her the chair, heart racing double time. Marriage? It was too much. He was watching her closely, expression expectant, obviously thinking there was a chance she’d say yes. “Still, it’s a really big step, Nick.” Her gut was churning just thinking about it. “Really big.”
“Also,” he said, and the corners of his mouth tugged into a half smile as if he knew he was starting to bring her around, “my mother raised twins. She’s here in town, and she’ll be over the moon about our babies. She’ll help out as much as we want. And if you want your mother around, too? No problem—we’ll fly her down.”
Harper sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it. Marrying without love hadn’t been in her life plan, but neither was being pregnant with twins. Nick was clearly committed to being a father to their children... Oh, God, was she seriously considering it? Her pulse felt erratic under her skin. It was completely ridiculous. Wasn’t it?
“I’ve had a pregnant wife before, and even though I wasn’t home through all of her pregnancy, I know there are things I can do to help.”
“What sort of things?” she asked, curious. She’d spent the first three months of this pregnancy alone, and her thoughts had often strayed to how the experience would be different if she were part of a couple.
He shrugged. “Going to the store for olives at two in the morning. Massaging feet. Help with the heavier chores and picking things up from the ground. Just the regular things a pregnant woman might want.”
Massaging feet? Ducking out for whatever she wanted to eat? She smiled. “That does sound useful.” But her smile faded as she thought about the reality of their situation. “Nick—”
“I know we can do it,” he said. “I love babies and kids. When Ellie was a baby, I was between tours, and her mother and I shared all her care. We can do this.”
Try as she might, she couldn’t see it working, but her legal training wouldn’t let her ignore the fact that it was the only solution on the table that addressed each issue they faced, so she owed it to herself and the babies to at least give the idea due consideration.
She smoothed her skirt over her lap. “Did you see us living together?”
“Absolutely,” he said, seemingly unfazed by her zeroing on the specifics.
“Are you thinking we’d live at your place or mine?”
“Mine. There’s more room.”
She almost smiled at the irony that they worked for the same company, yet she would commute to the company’s office each morning and he would stay in the house she also lived in.
Then she realized she hadn’t even seen his place. It could be a cabin in the woods with no running water. “Hang on. What’s your place like?”
“Big. Just outside town.” He rubbed a hand over his jaw as he thought. “Modern. Everything inside was done by a decorator, and she used words like minimalist and sleek. You can make any changes you want. I’m not fussy about that sort of thing.”
“Can I ask you something?” Did she imagine the wariness flickering briefly in his eyes before he answered?
He sat back and picked up his glass of water. “Sure.”
She laced her fingers together and, for a moment, wished her lawyer’s heart could just go with the flow instead of insisting she gather all the facts to file neatly in their slots.
“If we went ahead with this plan, do you see us as a couple?”
He chuckled. “We would be married. That’s pretty much the definition of a couple.”
But it was an important issue—just how married did he want to be? “That’s the legal arrangement. And we’ve discussed physical arrangements for me to move in. But what about us as two people?”
He raised an eyebrow. “You mean lovemaking?”
“I do,” she said. “It’s a reasonable consideration since we’re not strangers on that front.”
“No, we’re not.” A small muscle twitched in his jaw. “I’m open to the idea of a consummated marriage.”
Her skin heated. She swallowed. Hearing him say the words brought memories racing to the fore. Memories of their bodies sliding against each other, of sensitized skin, of the sounds he made as he found his release.
The waiter reappeared with their meals, and Harper was thankful for the timing so she could regain her poise. There was no doubt he made her melt inside. And they already knew they had explosive chemistry. But things were different now—so much more entwined and complex. Would that dampen some of the chemistry between them? Or would his touch always affect her?
She needed to move on, to stop thinking of his touch...
She cleared her throat. “What about length of time? Are you suggesting a lifetime commitment?”
“No, that would be unreasonable. Ideally it would last until our children were grown, but if we both made a commitment of, say, five years, we’d address all of our issues.”
“Except the one about the intact family unit.”
Nick reached out and covered her hand, his gaze softening. “It would never be the way it was with your father, Harper. Since we’d be going in with a businesslike arrangement, we’d be able to dissolve the union with little mess and drama. We’d prioritize the children and both have major roles in their lives. There would be no words in anger. Neither parent would just disappear.”
He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze then released it and picked up his utensils to twirl a forkful of pasta.
Her skin immediately felt the absence of his touch, which seemed to highlight the inherent problem of having to deal with his absence at the end of their marriage. What if they came to the end of five years and she’d fallen in love with him? Would she be setting herself up for another abandonment?
The weight of everything they were discussing came crashing down on her shoulders, and she could barely keep herself upright. She couldn’t do it. There had to be another way. There had to be.
She put her fork down, her dinner barely touched. “I’m sorry, Nick, but I don’t think marriage is the right way forward for us.”
He stilled, eyes focused on her. “Do you have another solution?”
“Not yet,” she said. She’d figure something out, though. She always did. “Give me a few days.”
He shook his head. “With Maverick on the loose, we might not have the luxury of a few days.”
She blew out a long breath, considering the factors. “Okay, give me twenty-four hours.”
“Sure. I can do that,” he said and signaled the waiter.
The short moment of relief that his agreement granted her soon faded as she realized that she had one day to achieve the near impossible.
Pushing that thought aside, she picked up her handbag and squared her shoulders, ready to meet the challenge head on.