Читать книгу I am Harmony - Radhe Shyam - Страница 13

During the years of Shri Babaji's physical absence, from 1922 to 1970, a great siddha yogi³⁸ came on the scene to tell people about Babaji and to foretell and prepare for His return.

The man who became known as Mahendra Baba, or Mahendra Maharaj, was born on March 4, 1908, in the home of his maternal grandfather in a village called Manika, near Mithila, Bihar. Mithila is the reputed birthplace of Lord Ram's wife, Sita. His childhood and boyhood were spent in this grandfather's home.

Mahendra's grandfather was a staunch devotee of the Goddess Durga - one of the names and aspects of The Divine Mother, the Creatrix and Nurturer. The family was well-to-do and well-educated. Mahendra attended the local school and when he came home from school he was taught Sanskrit by learned teachers. He also studied several other languages, including English.

The grandfather was learned in Sanskrit, astrology, and the ritualistic worship of God. He had a room separate from the rest of the household where he could do his pujas (ritual worship). He also read Durga Saptshati ("Seventy Verses in Praise of Goddess Durga") in Sanskrit several times a day. Young Mahendra soon learned to read it, too.³⁹

In his childhood and youth, Mahendra had several experiences of Babaji. He said that, as a very young child, he was healed of a near-fatal illness by a vision of Babaji and the Divine Mother, Goddess Durga. On his fifth birthday, Mahendra went to a sweet shop to buy candy and was given sweets by Shri Babaji. A man in Bombay, whom Mahendra Baba insisted on treating as a friend, rather than as a devotee, says that Mahendra Baba told him that when he graduated from high school, Mahendra went to buy sweets to celebrate the event and that, at the sweet shop, he was embarrassed by the stare of a tall, old saint. When Mahendra received his sweets, he offered some to this saint. The saint refused the sweets but said he wanted to go to Mahendra's home. Mahendra led the saint to his home and for the next six days and nights the saint taught Mahendra yogic knowledge. Then the saint walked out of the house and did not return. Mahendra had asked this guru where he came from (he replied that he had come from the Himalayas), but he had not asked his name. It is customary to call religious men "Baba" or "Maharaj," so Mahendra had needed no other name in his conversations with the saint.

Mahendra told other devotees that as soon as he reached boyhood he developed a desire to go to Vrindaban and meditate; he had a great love and respect for Lord Krishna. One day, when still a young boy, he asked his mother's permission to go to Vrindaban and repeat Krishna's name and 'find God.' His mother wept and begged him not to go until he had more education and understood spirituality better.

Mahendra went to college in Patna, Bihar. He told his friend in Bombay that while he was in Patna he saw his saintly teacher again. On a cold December day, Mahendra and a number of other college students saw and were intrigued by a 'mahatma' (great soul) and followed him through the city streets. The mahatma went to the bank of the Ganges River, threw off his outer clothes, waded out to an island in the river, and sat yogi-fashion. As he sat, the whole area around him became warm; the boys on the river bank took off their winter wraps as they stood and watched the saint. The saint shouted out to them, "Do not try to test a yogi's powers!" and the boys quickly left the area.

Mahendra capped his formal education with a Master of Arts degree in philosophy from Bhagalpur University in Bihar. His writings indicate a high degree of learning; they are so full of Sanskrit quotations and allusions to scriptural and literary incidents that they often make heavy reading for educated readers and they are extremely difficult to translate. Mahendra Maharaj told people that after he completed his education, he took part in Mahatma Gandhi's political movement for a while and visited many cities while involved in this work.

Mahendra said he decided to leave his home in 1928. One day, while out for a walk, he decided to go to Benares, so he just kept on walking - a distance of at least two hundred miles from his home. He spent some time in the Vishwanath Temple in Benares and then started a school. After a few days, his grandfather, learning where Mahendra was, sent him some money and said he would come to see Mahendra. On hearing this, Mahendra used the money his grand­father sent to move on to Vrindaban, where he "fell at the feet of Mother Radhaji."⁴⁰

He settled down for a long stay for 'sadhana' (religious practices for spiritual growth) in the village of Lohban, some miles from Vrindaban and close to Mathura, where Lord Krishna was born. His stay there lasted about twenty years, during which time he traveled a good deal and spent much time also in the Datta District of Gujarat, near the town of Ambaji, an area closely associated with the Divine Mother Amba. He never again visited his family in Bihar. While in Lohban, Mahendra Baba organized sessions for japa (repetition of God's names), for singing devotional songs, and for reading of scriptures like the Ramanaya. Many people came to him and were benefited by their association with him.⁴¹ He is still well remembered in Lohban. In 1984, the people of the village gave land and began collecting funds to build a temple and a small ashram in honor of Mahendra Maharaj and Shri Haidakhan Baba.

Though Mahendra Baba went to Vrindaban and Lohban to be with Lord Krishna and Mother Radha, he did not forget his great desire to find his guru. He walked through the Himalayas - in India, Nepal, and Tibet - searching for the guru who had come from the Himalayas to teach him yogic knowledge. It is said of Mahendra Baba that he never begged for food or other things - as most religious wanderers do - and that he often went hungry and in want, though usually people brought him food and gave him things he needed, without his asking. He spent much time in long fasts and meditated for long periods, wearing little, eating little, and speaking little. He was known for his severe penance. His growing number of devotees, including the rajah (king) of the Datta area, used to offer him food and sweets to ease his penance and preserve his health, but he rarely accepted these things.

For years, Mahendra Baba prayed that he might find his guru from the Himalayas, but he continued to be in ignorance of who he was. We are told that in 1949 Mahendra Baba had a vision at the Ambaji Temple in Datta in which the Goddess Durga came to him and told Mahendra Baba to go to the Almora District of Uttar Pradesh to look for his guru. His search in the Almora District is the first major theme in Mahendra Baba's book, "Anupam Kripa."

Early in the summer of 1949, he went to a temple in the town of Almora and stayed there for three or four days, but since he did not find his guru there he became restless and walked to Kosi, five or six miles away The next day he walked to a Surya Devi temple a mile above Kosi. In the evening, a villager offered to lead Mahendra Baba to another temple farther into the mountains. In the dark of early night, they walked along a path about a foot wide, high above a stream. Tired and hungry though Mahendra Baba was, there was no room to sit on the path and rest. After two hours, the villager pointed out the path to the temple and disappeared into the darkness to go home to his sick son. Mahendra Baba groped his way to a tiny village, but was stopped by barking dogs. He called out names of God and was heard by some women in the village temple, who sent a man to help him. The man offered to feed him, but Mahendra Maharaj asked only that he be led to the Shatrudra temple and, after midnight, they reached the Shiva Bolenath temple at Shatrudra.

As soon as Mahendra Maharaj drank the water of the stream that flows near the temple, his hunger and thirst vanished and he went to sleep on the porch of the temple. Very soon he was awakened by the priest of the temple, who, in great agitation, said, "Maharaj, tell me quickly what food I should bring for you. Tell me quickly, for the Lord Himself has told me sternly that an ascetic is hungry, and I am to feed him. See how, even now, my heart is beating!" Mahendra Baba protested he wanted nothing and he was so obviously tired that the priest told him to go to sleep. As Mahendra Baba settled down to sleep again, the priest went into the temple and stumbled against a bundle in the darkness. It contained flour, so he insisted on making bread and a vegetable in great quantities and fed Mahendra Maharaj well.

From place to place, like this, for eleven days, Mahendra Baba was led across the Almora District to Sheetlakhet where he met Shiromani Pathak, who, after an all-night talk⁴², sent Mahendra Maharaj on to the Siddhashram, just half a mile or so below Sheetlakhet.

"I came to the Ashram with [its] priest. Even a poet would be unable to describe the beauty of the place. In the Ashram is a bungalow type of travelers' rest house, a Laxmi Devi temple, with a stream constantly flowing by, and a hermitage. On the highest point is another hut from which one gets a view of the snow-covered peaks of Nandakot, Badrinarayan, Nilkanth, and many others.

"At some distance from the hut there are two deodar trees known by the names of 'Nar' and 'Narayan.' The priest told me to seat myself there - though neither any sadhu nor pilgrim usually is allowed to stay in this hut. In it are kept only Shri Maharaj's pictures, His mala [rosary], some books on Durga, Vishnu, the Gita, and certain other things pertaining to religious observances. No one has any right to use it. But, by the Lord's Grace, the priest opened the lock as soon as we reached the hut.

"I saluted the pictures and made obeisance [pranam]. My mind became exhilarated at once. What was this? These pictures were of my Gurudev⁴³ who had long ago made me His own when I was a student!"⁴⁴

Immediately, Mahendra Maharaj was overwhelmed with doubt, confusion, and conflict. Joy and the pains of doubt chased each other through his mind. He thought of fasting, but when he slept, the Goddess Mother appeared in his dreams and said, "Brother, I am hungry." He woke up crying and offered food and sweets to the goddess, and then ate from the offerings. He could not concentrate on jap (repetition of God's names) or meditation.

For three days Mahendra Baba lived in this inner confusion.

"I used to ask myself, 'What is the use of passing my time this way? Even after meeting Him, He forgets me; I cannot live without Him. Oh, mind of mine!, either forget Him completely and get immersed in worldly wealth and ease, or, by the might of your soul-force, lay your head at your Beloved's feet.' I made up my mind that I would fast unto death from the following day or until Shri Maharaj would root out this doubt of mine...

"Due to the cold, I had a late bath, and said my prayers, did my meditation and jap, and read a part of the scriptures; then I closed my door carefully from the inside and chained it. There was a small window on one side of the room, but it was closed with an iron grille; even so, I closed the shutters carefully and pushed the bolt shut... Making my obeisance to Shri Maharaj, I intended to sleep, never expecting that His Grace would descend so soon on me.

"In Shri Bhagwat I had read of Dhruva and had also read the lives of modern saints, such as Narasingh Mehta and others. These great rishis had attained salvation after great trials borne with strength and devotion. I was inexperienced, not a devotee, with neither faith nor love, and did not expect to meet the Lord so soon - though I knew His Grace would descend on me, for, if He did not intend to bestow it on me, why should He have called me to His holy temple? I knew for a certainty that He would pour His Grace on me. Such thoughts ran through my mind for some time; then I felt sleepy, for I was not afflicted with such great love for Him as to drive away sleep. I did not want to eat or drink, my mind was not directed toward ceremonies or singing sacred verses, so I decided to pass my time in sleep.

"Unthinkingly, whilst going to sleep, I looked toward the door while stretching out my legs - and I saw Shri Bhagwan standing there! From where He had come, and when, these things are unknown. Due to lack of space, the suddenness of His appearance, overwhelming reverence, and weakness of body and mind, I could not get up, but sat up and put both my weak and sinful hands on His holy feet - speechless; I was struck dumb!

"Even though my eyes were directed at His holy feet, I tried to catch a glimpse of His lotus-like face. For some time, He kept looking at me affectionately, as if making me His own by His Grace. I was oblivious of all external things. I was not aware of anything, except the intoxicating nectar of His Presence. Only that day did I realize my complete merging in Him - a true state of oneness with Lord Shiva Himself.

"Breaking my trance-like condition, Shri Bhagwan asked, 'Baba, what do you want?' That sweet voice of Shri Bhagwan was indescribable. Saints like Shri Valmiki, Vaidvyas, and others, on such occasions, have thought silence the best speech. In His generous and compassionate presence, I became whole. He was as happy to call an orphan under His fearless protection as a nursing cow feels on seeing her weak and wobbly child! The beauty of His revered body, its fragrance, the delicacy of His skin and His gentleness were beyond not only my vision but my knowledge, also. Then, putting His hands on my head, He asked, 'Baba, what do you want?'

"Hearing these words from His lotus-like appearance, and at the sight of His holy feet, I felt in my heart as if a royal father, seeing his son's pitiful condition, was instantly ready to give away everything to relieve him; so also was Shri Bhagwan eager to help me by bestowing on me the boon of all worldly and supernatural powers. Shri Bhagwan, Sambasadashiva, Lord of the Three Worlds and of all living creatures, was bestowing on me the great boon of salvation!

"I was filled with ecstasy! To appear before His child like this! To grant my wish by His Grace! With delight and great happiness, keeping my hands pressed to His holy feet, in a low voice I said, 'Your blessings.' The compassionate Lord's eyes filled with tears; His strong heart melted. Putting both His holy hands again on my head, and saying, 'Baba, this way has been closed: He disappeared from my sight."⁴⁵

It took some time for the overwhelmed Mahendra Baba to calm down. After a while, he unlatched his door and went out onto the verandah, looking everywhere in amazement and happiness, to see if he could see Lord Shiva again. The ashram priest came by and Mahendra Baba asked him to go and ask Shiromani to come to him, and to bring food from the shops in Sheetlakhet. Mahendra Baba stood confused as to whether what he had seen was a reality or a delusion.

"...There were a number of reasons for my doubt. First of all, I have a doubting nature; secondly, Maharaj was not dressed in a cap and kurta [the long shirt] when He appeared to me; a short length of cloth was wrapped around His waist, and half of it was tied lower down. The cloth was very bright and attractive. In a semi-conscious condition, thinking of Shri Prabhu's compassion and power, again and again I was overpowered with the joy of His Presence.

"Meanwhile, [Shiromani] arrived. The priest came a bit later with his purchases. I asked [Shiromani] what sort of clothes Shri Baba wore. In a grave voice, he explained that He had no special type of apparel. We sometimes made Him wear a kurta and cap, he said; sometimes a jacket and turban, and for a short time Shri Prabhu would accept whatever we gave. Generally, He had a dhoti [a long length of cloth], half of which was wrapped round the upper part of His body, and the rest around the lower part.

"As soon as I heard this, my doubts vanished. Then, pointing to the side of the room Shri Bhagwan had glanced at just before He left, I asked him, ' [Shiromani], was there ever a door on this side of the room?' [Shiromani] was greatly astonished at this question. Falling at my feet, he asked, 'Are you deluding me? Are you yourself Shri Haidakhan Wale Baba? He, also, did not have any fixed likeness! The All-powerful Lord, putting on all sorts of forms; He was in the habit of appearing in various forms; He was God!' Saying this, he started weeping.

"Now Shiromanji regained his composure and, holding me by the hand, took me into the room. He pointed out to me certain signs showing where a door-frame had been formerly, in the direction toward which Shri Maharaj had pointed. It was only a mark of where the door had been. I could not fully understand the significance of the door and so I re­quested [Shiromani] to explain it fully to me. He told me that Shri Maharaj's room had a door on that side, but one of the devotees had it blocked and opened another, for his own convenience. This was enough for me; I had been granted what I longed for, and my heart said that even if I died now, I had, by His great blessing, attained peace in this world.

"For the next five or six days there was no will to do anything. Then a strong desire arose that the world should hear the blessed and compassionate message of Lord Shiva. Only He could save humanity in these dark days in the world. I examined and searched my heart minutely to see whether there was any lurking desire hidden in my heart to achieve greatness or fame for myself, which sought to be gratified in this way. But it is useless to write more about that, for by the Lord's blessing, such a motive was not there, and is not now present. The prompting of this wish was for the good of humanity only, and especially for those who believed in me as their spiritual teacher, and wished to attain salvation through my help - though often then, and even now, I explain my inability to give them this aid. I explained to them that this is all Bhagwan's Lila [God's activity or 'play'] and I was a mere messenger of His. But I felt I should give to humanity this blessed message of the Lord. So be it!"⁴⁶

After leaving Siddhashram, Mahendra Maharaj made a visit to Haidakhan - the first of many visits there. He spent about a week in the cave where 'Old Haidakhan Baba' used to sit. During the third or fourth night of his stay, he was awakened by a rattling sound, which was repeated two or three times. When he fell asleep again, the noise woke him again and he jumped up in alarm. He was amazed at his fright; he had slept in fearful forests and on mountains without such fear. Thinking that whatever God sent him was for his good, "not out of faith or fear, but just to pass the time"⁴⁷ he started reciting prayers. He lost consciousness and in this state he composed prayers to Shri Munindra (one of the names of The Divine) through the power of divine Grace. Repeating the verses gave him great joy. But after saying them once, he started to forget them. He thought that if he had a pencil and a light he could have written them down. Then he thought that if they were inspired by God, God would not forget them but would bring them back to Mahendra Baba's memory in the morning, whereas if they were of his own making, there was no harm in forgetting them. So he went peacefully to sleep.

A teacher from the village used to pass by the cave and bring milk to Mahendra Baba. At 8 a.m., the teacher found Mahendra Baba still asleep and awakened him, saying, "I think you are an educated person; take this pencil and paper in case you wish to write something."

Before drinking the milk, Mahendra Baba sat on a stone near the river, in front of the cave, and, after saying a short prayer, he began writing the verses which had come to him in the night. "Ah! At that time each word of the invocations appeared as if illumined. With extreme joy I wrote down the mantric illuminated words with hands trembling with emotion; then, thanking God for His boundless grace and greatness, I drank the milk."⁴⁸

Mahendra Maharaj stayed in the cave another three or four days and composed poetic invocations and prayers without any effort. Some gave teachings; others gave explanations of beautiful but difficult Sanskrit verses. The thought came to him that since childhood he had prayed that he did not want wealth, acclaim, beautiful women, or poetry, but here, by God's grace, he had acquired this poetic power which he was using with joy. He concluded this gift was an enticement, a test⁴⁹ - and Mahendra Maharaj tore up all his own compositions, saving the divinely given one, and left Haidakhan.

Shri Manherlal K. Vora of Bombay states that soon after the experiences at Siddhashram and Haidakhan, Mahendra Baba came to the Vora home, still pondering his experiences, still wavering between faith and doubt. Mahendra Baba had Mr. Vora take him to Ramana Maharshi's ashram⁵⁰ at Tam Vana Malali near Madras. There Mahendra Maharaj was reassured that Haidakhan Baba was great, and was a reality, and that he (Mahendra Baba) was in good hands.

Mahendra Baba wrote to many friends and acquaintances about his experiences; he began to teach and preach more urgently the Message of God; he assembled the Haidakhan Aarati (the sung worship service), writing parts of it himself and incorporating hymns from other traditional aaratis; he went to the several ashrams established by 'Old Haidakhan Baba' and repaired and maintained those which had decayed, and united the devotees 'Old Haidakhan Baba' had left with those who learned of Him through Mahendra Baba's efforts.