Читать книгу Twin Souls - Raimon Samsó - Страница 12

Ten minutes later we entered the hospital through the emergency door. Lorena had entered the ICU and permission to enter that restricted area was given only to Sam. When Sam finally appeared again, his face showed somber forecast.

-They can’t tell me if she’ll live. They can’t assure it.

When she came in, she was conscious, but she slipped into a coma shortly after. They have her with tubes. She seems to be dying or resuscitating any minute now.

-Lorena is young, she’s strong, and she’ll get out of this one. You’ll see.

-It better be, or they will have to bury us both.

The doctor said she had no fracture, some bruises, but the most worrying thing was the concussion in her head. And worst: evidence of cervical lesions. We spent the night at the hospital, from the waiting room to the coffee machine. Until the first rays of sun came through the window.

At noon, we received news from the doctor, a bunch of confusing references about her vital signs, but what I did understand was that she was out of danger, even though we still had to wait and see her development. Suddenly, all the feelings of self loathing I had harbored for two years seem like cheap baggage compared to the desperation a father feels when he is just about to lose his daughter.

Her companion, a studio musician – twenty five, keyboardist – died instantly. They were work friends. He was driving when the car precipitated on a deep embankment. You are never prepared to accept death, at least not with young people.

Those days were filled with doctor reports, coming and going from Mercy Hospital; who’s recollection, even today, bring back a sour, hypnotic memory, painted in aseptic white.

During the days following my date with Jodie, I kept going back to her comments. Jodie had taken a plane to San Diego. She needed to spend time with the restaurant in that city. I, on my side, needed to reconsider. I felt confused, however in some way all of that had a special sense in that moment.

I had definitely abandoned the comfort zone I called «security». And knew I would never go back to it. I was faced with a new system of beliefs based on a reality that I couldn’t see or touch. I couldn’t go back, no matter my increasing uncertainty. I couldn’t forget what I had learned, and I couldn’t stop wanting to learn more.

When you reach a new paradigm of comprehension, the old one loses meaning, there is no turning back.

Jodie insisted that I painted with more heart and less technique, or I would run the risk of leaving my paintings stripped of emotion. She suggested that I picked the topics of my works following my hunches, without searching for the critics acclaim. She encouraged me to try. «Flow. Even if you are disoriented at the beginning, little by little everything will march better», she said.

My small world had begun to change since my arrival in Santa Monica, my painting too, and myself with all of that.

The phone rang; it was Javier from Barcelona, Spain.

-Victor, how is everything? I hope you are enjoying yourself. I leave tomorrow for Paris; I will close your Studio and leave the keys with your neighbor. Barcelona has been a success. I will tell you later.

And you? Have you finished your paintings?

I wasn’t going to lie, so I came clean.

-Not yet Javier. At the moment I have limited myself to reflection. By the way, I’ve met someone very interesting and I think she is having an influence on me compared to when the spring is taking over a garden.

-And that special someone. Is she female?

-Her name is Jodie.

-¡Finally, Victor! You don’t know how much I like to hear that. Jodie, Jodie, That’s a pretty name! I will never get tired of telling you: you need a woman by your side

So tell me: are you dating?

-Well, I wouldn’t say that. And no sex, if that’s what you are thinking.

-Well, we are facing a serious case! So what are you waiting for? Come on, go, relax, leave your studies for a day, take her to Mexico. Tell her you love her by sunset. It works!

He wasn’t listening

-Javier…

-She’ll love it, for sure!

-Javier, please, stop acting like you are my older brother, will you?

-Tell me at least how is she.

I found a great word to describe her:

-She’s ideal, that’s the troubling part.

-Perfect! Send me an e-mail, come on, and tell me all the details.

- Now that we are talking about it, Javier, can you tell me what the deal is with your recent messages? – I was referring to the e-mails that had arrived in my inbox.

-Recent messages? I don’t know what you mean, Victor. I don’t have time for anything. I have to hang up know, I will call you. When you return from Mexico!

He hung up.

Days later something interesting happened. A certain book came to my hands: Universe Partner, which I read in three days and re-read in a flash to take notes. According to the book’s author, in every one of nature’s events you can see the intelligent guide of the universe.

Everything is part of a cosmic symphony of pure intelligence willing to confirm the power of intention. What intelligence?

The same one behind every miracle of creation: a birth, a flower, a kiss, a sunset, a caress…

Doesn’t that clear many of the whys?

For the book’s author, love is always present and leaves visible trails which go beyond what’s apparent. He continues, equaling the creator and the creation whose distinction in reality does not exist. This idea impacted me and, afterwards, it caught my attention powerfully, the concept that as we connect more with that support, more deep does that relationship of collaboration becomes. Everyone, absolutely everyone, is caught in that subtle plot, hence the title of the book. If things are as he explains, the sensation of separation and abandonment is an illusion of the mind. I thought.

I read, also, a bunch of interesting concepts, like that even beyond our understanding, everything is related. And hence, the word coincidence should be erased from the encyclopedia. Or, better yet, it should be modified so it says «causality». The author plants some interesting questions for which he proposes answers.

« Can the universe think? »

« We are of course, part of it and we make it. Nature maintains life in the planet adapting to new challenges».

« Can a superior intelligence not think? »

«That is possible. It has to be able to do it in a perfect manner. And in its perfection it has such an amount of information that it makes everything fit and leaves out any loose ends».

« ¿Can we interact with this intelligence? »

«In a certain way, we do everything when we internalize. If praying is talking to God, then intuition is the answer to those prayers».

« Is it indifferent with our thoughts? »

«If we are part of it and it is a part of us, nothing is indifferent. According to quantum physics, it’s not that information is passed through, but it remains in every part of the field at the same time».

«When desire is expressed, what happens? »

«Its possibilities grow. Pure desire is based on inclusion, and never exclusion or lack of. Pure desire incorporates the certainty that it has begun to happen, although at an invisible level. For that matter, desire from the conscious of absence -thinking that there is a lack of it - is useless».

All of that material connected with Jodie’s words. So if I was in metaphysical puzzle, the pieces began to fit. The book’s author, Jodie, the mysterious virtual friend«J. ». Different people asserted the same thing and that conscience overwhelmed me.

I left the book. And wished to reunite with Jodie to exchange impressions about what I had read. Each idea added to the ones before, pointed them, and gave feet to new ones. A concept led me to another one, and another one…

Before me, the image of the puzzle appeared little by little. I wished to see Jodie again. Only to talk about the book? Being honest, to see her. Even more: I was dying to see her.

When we reunited it gave me the impression that the two of us where alone in this planet; but when she was not by my side, I felt completely alone in this galaxy.

That night, I got a third e-mail. It made reference to certain comments from the book. I began to think that this book didn’t come to me by chance, so: what strange conspiracy made it find me?

«Creation gives proof of its intelligence in all its manifestations. The world we inhabit has an unlimited power of organization and the most outstanding thing is: It reacts to our intention. For that reason, everything seems to happen with the minimum effort. In the same way, our mind is part of a superior mind. And from her, we get bursts of wisdom. We are but a simple page in a gigantic universal encyclopedia.

Intuitions can be supported by words, images or sensations that get to you. Or a combination of everything at once. Rarely will information be too elaborate, and often it has to be interpreted. It doesn’t use proper names, only similarities, metaphors, signs, coincidences and symbols. On occasions, an event is considered random, when associated with a question, it becomes an answer.

When you make a decision, first and foremost, never force the easy or comfortable answer. What you get with that is inadequate. Second, you must ask yourself what kind of life you want and if the decision you are going to make fits with that will. Third, you must learn to listen to your heart. Your heart knows. Fourth, and last, you must learn to trust».

Signed J, always J, whoever J was… I printed it, read it once, twice, even three times. It seemed as if every step I took, someone was bothering to accompany it with an explanation, like a foot note, like a subtitle.

I turned off the studio lights and left for the hospital to accompany Sam and Lorena.