Читать книгу Her Valentine Family - Renee Andrews - Страница 10

Jessica drove mechanically back to Claremont, her mind processing the magnitude of what she’d learned on campus tonight. Chad was an instructor at Stockville Community College. He’d moved back to Claremont and was teaching. She shook her head at that. He’d wanted that medical degree so much. Why had he given up on that dream?

She’d kept her pregnancy from him to protect that dream, to make certain that he achieved that goal first before she told him about their son. Then when she’d come back to Claremont three years ago to tell him about Nathan, Chad’s sister Becky had said he was done at UGA, that he’d actually gotten his bachelor’s degree in three years and that he was going to Emory for med school and getting married. That was the last time Jess had spoken to her old friend, since Becky had also married and moved away with her army husband. She’d heard they were stationed in Alaska. And when Becky moved so far away, the two friends had lost touch without Jessica ever telling her friend she was an aunt…or telling Chad he was a daddy.

And Jess had consequently lost her primary link to Nathan’s father.

Some time after that trip home, Chad returned to Claremont, had a daughter and got a divorce.

A divorce. Chad had confided in her repeatedly through their teen years about how much it hurt growing up without two parents and how he’d marry for life, that he’d do whatever it took to make his marriage work and that if he had children, he’d never, ever want them to go through life without parents who cared about them and without love in the home.

Yet he’d divorced. What had happened? What would have caused him to separate from his wife? Had she left him? Was she still living in Claremont? Becky had told her that Chad met his wife in Atlanta, while he was attending Emory. Maybe she was used to big cities and couldn’t handle small-town life? No, Jess thought. They wouldn’t have moved back to Claremont if that had been the case.

So many questions and not a single answer to be found. Yet he wanted them to get together for coffee so they could chat about what happened when she left six years ago. Well, Jessica wanted to chat, too, and learn what happened in the six years since—specifically, what happened to the marriage that had kept her from telling Chad about Nathan three years ago.

Again, Jess shook her head in disbelief. Why would anyone leave Chad? Maybe his wife had hurt him, so much that he simply couldn’t stay with her. And Chad apparently had custody of their daughter.

A daughter. Chad had a daughter and, according to him, she was “pretty amazing.”

Tears trickled down her cheeks. The delight he’d expressed when telling Jess about the little girl pierced her heart. It wasn’t that she was upset he had a child with someone else. The thing was, he didn’t realize that he had a pretty amazing son, too. He didn’t know because Jessica still hadn’t told him.

She wondered if the little girl, Lainey, looked like Nathan. Did she act like him? Did Chad get to watch her blond baby fuzz hair turn sandy and wavy, so much like his own? Or the blue eyes she’d been born with change to that stunning deep forest-green, with the tiny gold flecks and ring of dark brown around the edge. Were her eyes inquisitive, like Nathan’s, always searching for answers, examining every tiny nuance of life around them?

Jessica suddenly had an immeasurable longing to see his daughter, get to know her and introduce her to Nathan. She wondered how old Lainey was, and she was instantly touched by the fact that Nathan was a big brother. He’d often asked her for a little brother or sister who he could teach things to. At the time, she’d tried to let him down easy, since that was nowhere near a possibility when she’d had no interest in dating; she’d only wanted to raise her son, for the time being. She’d thought maybe, someday, she’d find love again, but it certainly had been a distant dream. And in her heart, she wasn’t sure she could ever truly love anyone but Chad.

She passed the sign that said Welcome to Claremont at the edge of town and followed the familiar roads leading home. She noticed the new subdivisions, houses on cul-de-sacs where cotton fields had once been. Square beams of light shone from the windows of the homes on the winding streets.

Chad lived in one of those houses. Chad—and his daughter.

At some point between Stockville and Claremont, it had started to rain. With the darkness and the water streaming in wet sheets down her windshield, she was taken back to the last time she’d seen Chad Martin. She’d driven to his house to tell him that they were going to have a baby, and she knew it’d be tough, but she’d known that the two of them would find a way to make it work. They’d get married and start their family.

But he’d had big news that night, too. And after he told her that he’d gotten the scholarship he’d dreamed of, a full ride to the University of Georgia, she simply couldn’t tell him about the baby. And she’d driven home in the rain, crying the whole way. Then she’d called him and told him a lie.

The rain fell harder, and she slowly pulled her car into the driveway, then darted to the house. And like that night six years ago, her mother was waiting in the living room, sitting on the couch and staring at the door expectantly. The last time she’d been waiting to see whether Jessica would agree to move to Tennessee, live with her grandmother and have her baby. This time she was waiting for something else, and Jess didn’t think it was merely to see how her classes went in Stockville.

“So, how was your night?” Anna Bowman asked, leaning forward on the couch. “How were your classes? Did you see anyone you know?” Her cheeks flushed slightly, and she clarified, “I thought, you know, with the campus being so close to Claremont and all, that you might have run into some of your old classmates.”

Jess suddenly realized that there was more going on here than she’d originally thought, more to her parents’ interest in sending her to the college.

They knew.

“Where’s Nathan?” she asked, trying to tamp down on her shock and control her voice.

“Your father is reading him a story before bed,” her mother said and smiled, but it didn’t quite meet her eyes.

Jessica crossed the room, sat in the oak rocking chair that had been her grandmother’s and began to slowly rock back and forth while she let her mind play over everything that had happened in the past few weeks. Her parents had called her in Tennessee and told her how much they wanted her to bring Nathan back here for school. She’d thought about it for a few days, a little hesitant about moving in the middle of the school year, but finally deciding that she wanted to do that, too, raise him in her hometown and near his grandparents. She wanted him to have some sense of a real family. But then they’d also wanted her to go back to school, and they’d wanted her to go to the community college in Stockville rather than the one in Claremont. They even paid her first semester’s tuition as a Christmas present.

“How long have you known?” she asked softly.

A slight flush whispered up her mother’s throat. “Known what?”

“That Chad was divorced and moved back here and that he was teaching at Stockville.”

Her mother cleared her throat. “Oh, well, you know how small towns are.” She waved her hands slightly as she spoke. “Everybody talks when someone comes back to town. Your father and I thought you might want an opportunity to see him again, maybe talk to him and tell him about Nathan.”

She’d always planned to tell Chad about their son. That’s why she’d returned three years ago, but then she’d learned he was about to get married and she’d returned to her grandmother’s farm in Tennessee. But she’d always intended to tell him, and she assumed God would let her know when the time was right.

Evidently, He thought the time was right now, and He let her parents help set things in motion.

“So, you saw Chad tonight?” her mother asked.

“Yes.”

“We were planning to help you go back to school one day anyway,” she explained. “But when we heard he was teaching at Stockville we thought that was a sign we should send you there. God works in mysterious ways,” her mother added, smiling. “You forgive us for not telling you the whole story?”

“I do,” Jessica said. How could she be upset with them for wanting their grandson to know his father? But she wondered if Chad would ever forgive her for not telling him about his son. Soon, she suspected, she’d know, whenever she gained enough courage to tell him the truth. For now, though, she’d go see the other guy with green-gold eyes who held a large piece of her heart.

She hugged her mom, told her that she was sure everything would work out the way it was supposed to and then headed upstairs.

The door to the guest room, Nathan’s room for now, was cracked open. She approached quietly and peered inside, eager to see the interaction between Nathan and his granddaddy. Nathan hadn’t had a father figure in his world so far, and he hadn’t spent nearly as much time with her father as she would’ve liked, so this scene was very special.

Her son sat against the headboard, his sandy curls leaning against her father’s side as Nathan pointed to a page of the book his granddaddy held. He tilted his head up and raised his brows, the same face he always gave Jessica when he expected her to answer one of his intricate questions.

Nathan never accepted anything at face value. Even at two, he was determined to learn exactly how his toy train whistled and took the thing completely apart, to the point that Jessica couldn’t even attempt to put it back together. He wanted to know how things worked, why things happened, what caused what in the entire scheme of things. He was inquisitive, intelligent and witty. Never afraid to ask what he wanted to know. In other words, he was his father’s son, and Jessica couldn’t have been more pleased.

She recalled Chad’s blunt query from earlier to night.

“Have you married?” And then “Why not?”

Tough questions, for sure, but she was used to tough questions. She got them often enough from Nathan. And he wasn’t cutting her father any slack now.

She stepped into the room in time to hear him ask, “But how did the stone knock his head off?”

Her father’s smile, and his adoration for his grandson, was absolutely breathtaking. And he didn’t get frustrated by Nathan’s confusion. Instead, he appeared to enjoy that Nathan wanted facts about the story. “You see, God was helping David, and that’s how the stone knocked off the giant’s head. Or rather, the stone knocked him down and then David cut off his head with a sword.”

Nathan’s small hands instinctively moved to grasp his head.

“No one would want to hurt your head, so you have nothing to worry about,” her dad said with a low chuckle

Nathan squinted at his granddaddy, then apparently noticed Jessica’s presence and shifted gears in the subject matter to what he knew was the most important item in her day. “Hey, Mama. Did you get it? Get that job you wanted?”

She’d called home and told her parents about the position at the day care center right after the interview. Apparently, they hadn’t thought her little guy would be interested in her news, which proved they still had a lot to learn about their grandson. Nathan was interested in everything, and she loved that about him, just like she loved it about his Daddy.

“Well, did you?” Nathan repeated.

“I did,” she said, opening her arms and waiting, while he jumped off the bed and ran to give her his traditional welcome home hug. She inhaled his little boy smell—chocolate chip cookies with a hint of soap from his bath—and squeezed him tightly.

“Hey, I can’t breathe!”

Laughing, she released her hold and placed him on the bed, where he crawled back to his spot beneath the covers.

“Sorry. I missed you,” she said.

“Missed you, too,” he said, “But maybe you won’t miss me too much while I’m at big school if you have all those little kids to take care of,” he said, happily putting himself in the “big kid” category.

“Yeah, those little ones need someone to take care of them, for sure,” she agreed, enjoying the way his eyes beamed at her, and the way the gold flecks sparkled within the deep sea of green. She’d never gotten tired of those eyes six years ago, when she’d fallen in love with Chad Martin. And she sure didn’t get tired of them now.

“Now that you’re going to work, Granddaddy says I can take the bus and it will pick me up right outside, by the mailbox.” Nathan pointed out the window toward the end of the driveway, where that big gold bus always picked up Jessica when she was his age. “And he said he’ll wait with me in the morning and that MeMaw will help me pack my new Superman lunch box for school.” Exactly what they’d done with Jessica, except her lunch box had had Malibu Barbie on the front.

“What new Superman lunch box?”

“The one MeMaw bought him at Walmart today, I suppose,” her father said, grinning.

“I got new Superman shoes, too,” Nathan announced. “For school.”

“Sounds like MeMaw is spoiling you rotten.” Jessica cocked her head at her dad.

“Don’t look at me,” he said. “You know I’d have said no.”

“Sure you would’ve,” Jess said, spying an empty glass with a hint of milk at the bottom and a crumb-covered plate on the nightstand, which explained why Nathan had smelled like chocolate chip cookies.

“You’re getting me the backpack, Granddaddy,” Nathan said. “Remember?”

Her father shrugged. “Okay, guilty.”

“Let’s stop the madness at the backpack,” Jessica said, pressing a finger against Nathan’s nose.

“They’ve got Superman notebooks, too,” Nathan mumbled. Then he looked at his granddaddy and grinned. “And pencils.”

“Well, you certainly can’t have the backpack and not get the matching notebooks and pencils, can you?” her father asked.

“You might as well hang it up, Jess,” her mother said, stepping into the room. “We’re hopeless and are bound and determined to spoil him rotten.” She smiled. “But that’s our job.”

“Yep, that’s their job,” Nathan agreed, smiling broadly and showcasing the empty hole where a tiny baby tooth used to be.

Jessica’s heart tensed. He was growing up way too fast.

“And I’ll catch the bus right out there,” he said, informing MeMaw of the bit of conversation she’d missed earlier. “Until we get our new house. And then I’ll ride it from there.”

Jessica had moved in with her folks until she could find a place of her own, and she had been up front with Nathan about that plan. She didn’t want him getting too attached to living with his grandparents, and she hadn’t wanted them to get too attached to having her and Nathan here either. She was twenty-three and didn’t want to mooch off of her parents forever.

However, she had to admit that being with them now and seeing them enjoy having her and Nathan here was very nice.

“I see,” her mother said, sitting on the bed beside her husband. They looked so good together, so content after all of these years, sitting there with Nathan, and Jessica suddenly had a sense of exactly what was missing in her life.

Then Nathan giggled, and she remembered that her life was fine. No, not what she’d planned, but A-OK for now. And she’d seen Nathan’s daddy tonight and also learned that Nathan had a little sister. On Tuesday, she’d talk to Chad, maybe even tell him about their little boy.

Excitement bubbled within her. Excitement…and fear.

God, help me be strong enough to tell him. And God, please, let him understand.

Chad Martin woke up bright and early Friday morning. Or to be more precise, he gave up on any hope of a decent night’s sleep at around 5:00 a.m. He’d dozed off and on, but whether his eyes were open or closed, his mind wouldn’t stop running through the events of last night, from the moment he saw the woman walking across the quad to the moment he realized that Jessica was really back in Claremont.

Really back in his life.

She was as pretty as she was back then—prettier—with silky chocolate hair, dark brown eyes and that cute little nose that wrinkled when she laughed. And when she laughed, her mouth was soft and subtle, easily finding its way into a smile. Jess had a smile that took his breath away. There was something so genuine about it, as though the whole world should look a little brighter when she grinned. It simply made him feel good inside to see that smile.

But it wasn’t merely her physical appearance that attracted Chad to Jess so much, though she was the most naturally attractive female he’d ever met. There was a fresh, honest appeal to Jessica Bowman. She was the kind of girl who could not only be your best friend, the one you could open your soul to, but also the kind of girl you could love—for life. He’d sensed that in her when they were teens, from the time she started coming over to their house, first as Becky’s friend. And then, as she grew older, and as she and Chad talked and grew closer, as Chad’s first true love.

He followed the strong scent of coffee to the kitchen and was thankful he’d taken the time to set the automatic brew feature the night before. Pretty incredible that he remembered, given how shaken he’d been from Jessica’s reappearance into his world. He’d even forgotten the day of the week when he’d asked what time she finished class today. That was one of the things he loved about the community college, the fact that every week was a four-day deal, giving him Fridays to truly enjoy his daughter.

And speaking of his little girl, Lainey would wake up soon, and Chad needed to be ready. She was eighteen months old now, toddling around and talking baby speak and quite a handful.

Chad loved every minute of it.

Grabbing a University of Georgia mug, he filled the cup with coffee, moved to his back window and enjoyed the strong taste against his palette. He thought about Lainey and how much he enjoyed his little girl. And then he remembered Jessica’s words.

“I have a son.”

Jessica had a little boy. Chad had been so stunned at the news that he hadn’t asked any of the normal questions. Now he wondered how old he was. What was he like? Did he look like Jess? And naturally he wondered who was the little guy’s father? And why hadn’t Jess married him? He couldn’t fathom her having a baby out of marriage, not after the conversations they had back in high school about that very thing. Particularly that one conversation on the night she left town.

The baby monitor on the kitchen counter crackled as Lainey sighed in her sleep. She was probably getting ready to start stirring, and she’d want her juice as soon as she opened her eyes. Chad took another sip of his coffee, then set the mug on the counter, grabbed her pink Minnie Mouse sippy cup and filled it with apple juice. Next he scanned the kitchen until he spotted her pacifier on the table. He took it to the sink, rinsed it off and then placed it next to the sippy cup.

Fridays were fun days for Chad, days to really take the time to see what Lainey had learned throughout the week, hear whatever new words she was saying and watch her toddle around and explore the world. He was anxious for the weather to get warm enough to take her to Hydrangea Park and feed the ducks. It wouldn’t be long, thanks to Alabama’s mild winters, and he couldn’t wait.

Another soft mumble echoed through the baby monitor, and Chad knew his little girl was starting to rouse. He took another sip of coffee and watched the first rays of sunlight break through the night. The sky immediately took on an array of colors with the brilliant addition. Purples and pinks, oranges and golds.

Chad sipped more coffee and thought how quickly the sun’s rays had changed the sky’s disposition, shifting it in one broad stroke from dismal gray and black to a kaleidoscope of vivid hues. He’d say the new morning sky looked rather heavenly, like a painting from God.

A frown tugged at his mouth, and he sighed. God had painted his life a bit differently than the one he’d envisioned, the one that included a happy home and a medical degree. But he was a firm believer that things happen for a reason, for God’s reason, and even though he hadn’t been on the best of terms with Him for the past few years, Chad was trying to get back on the right track again, slowly but surely. He and Lainey had even made it to a couple of church services, and it didn’t feel so awkward, as though everyone was staring at them and feeling pity toward him and his life.

True, it wasn’t what he’d planned, but he’d work it out the best way he knew how. And right now, the best way he knew how involved teaching biology at the community college and being with Lainey.

The sun had moved up to a half globe now, a red-orange mass that pressed outward and pushed the black away, changing everything in its path from dark and gloomy to bright and cheery.

This was part of Chad’s morning ritual, watching the sun rise from his kitchen window, and he was certain it had probably looked this incredible several other days as well. But today, he saw the image more clearly, and he saw it as a symbol, perhaps a sign from God, that his dark, gloomy life was changing. A ray of sunlight found its way through the darkness last night, when Jessica walked back into his life again, and Chad found, like the sky that he currently watched out his window, that everything around him looked brighter.

A tiny little grunt, followed by the sound of rustling sheets, emitted through the baby monitor told him that Lainey was waking up. He set his coffee mug on the counter and picked up the sippy cup and pacifier. Then he started down the hall.

“Dada,” she said, her tiny voice whimpering.

He grinned. Only eighteen months old and already she knew she wasn’t a morning person. She was like her mother that way. Kate didn’t “do” mornings. With Kate, it’d been a bit irritating.

With Lainey, it was cute.

He rounded the corner and walked into her room, where his little lady stood inside of her crib, her small fists clenched tightly around the railing, her big blue eyes staring unblinking at the door and awaiting his arrival, and her blond curls, as always, standing on end, wild and crazy with her adorable bedhead. Dora the Explorer covered the new pink fleece pajamas he’d bought her earlier this week. He’d thought the way the feet were built into the pajamas would keep her toes warm, since she often worked her way out of her tiny socks at night. But right now, she held up one foot as though the feature was more of a nuisance than a benefit.

“Good morning, sunshine,” he said, holding up the juice and pacifier so she could see he’d brought what she wanted and consequently, she wouldn’t feel the need to start crying for them. And maybe that’d make her forget about her problem with his choice for her nightwear.

“Duuuce,” she said, and reached for the sippy cup.

Chad obligingly handed it over.

She took a big sip, noisily slurping her little pink lips around the tiny holes in the top of the cup. Then she swallowed, moved the cup away from her mouth and held out her other hand. “Pappy.”

Chad put the pacifier in her hand. She balled her fist around it and gave him her trademark baby-tooth grin.

“Tank oo.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, scooping her up and nuzzling the blond fuzzy curls away so he could kiss her cheek and neck.

Lainey ducked her chin to her neck trying to fend off her Daddy’s kisses and giggled. “Wuv you.”

“I love you, too,” Chad said. And he did love everything about her—her blond curls, her baby blue eyes, her adorable mouth. He realized, as he often did, that everything about her resembled Kate. There wasn’t a trace of Chad’s features in this little angel. But resembling Kate physically was as far as it went. Because Lainey’s brilliant blue eyes were sweet and innocent, not manipulative and cold. Lainey’s smile was real, not fake.

And when Lainey told him she loved him, she meant it.