Читать книгу With Honor - Rhonda Lee Carver - Страница 7

Chapter 3

Jasmine ate a small breakfast of toast, yogurt and coffee in a restaurant across the street from her motel. She stared out the window as two children played jump rope in a patch of grass beside the parking lot. Watching the smiles erupt on their faces, she couldn’t resist smiling too. She’d always wanted a child, or two, but she hadn’t planned to have one so soon, or with a complete stranger. Her doubts were real, no matter how much she wanted her baby.

The waitress stopped by the table. The woman cracked her gum loudly. “You want me to top off your cup?”

“No thanks,” Jasmine answered.

After tossing around in the hard, cheap bed last night, she sure could use another cup, but she’d been making an effort to cut the caffeine. Some days she slept like a ton of bricks, other times she couldn’t catch a wink. Last night she’d been wide awake thinking of Shane. Even after she’d fallen asleep, she’d dreamt of him. Why now? Why after seeing him? She knew why, but wasn’t quite ready to admit it to herself. People are attracted most to the one they can’t be with–or know they shouldn’t be with. Could she have feelings for Shane? The idea was ludicrous.

The deep apprehension stuck with her. In less than fifteen minutes she’d again be meeting with Shane–the father of her unborn child.

Father. Unborn child. Those were alien words.

At a cross between shock and numbness, this was a new realm of emotion. Seeing Shane in Florida, not once had she felt a connection beyond satisfying a need. Her sex life had been lacking–by choice. Her female parts had been parched and his offer to water the field had been an offer she couldn’t refuse. A night of forbidden love had been all she wanted and needed.

So then why the sudden feelings?

Why did she have a case of unidentified emotions floating around inside her? Was it because they shared something in common now? A child.

She’d been delighted and dazed when he’d protected her from the earthquake, using his body as shelter. Not every man would do that, but a gentleman would. She wasn’t helpless by any means, but something about his action made her believe Shane could be a man of honor. Still needing proof, she’d know after their meeting.

Time to get this over with.

A few minutes later, she drove onto base, and as promised, security checked her credentials, then handed over Shane’s address written on a small piece of paper.

The sudden urge to look at herself in the mirror overcame her. Her clothes were simple, yet she’d taken a little more time with her hair and makeup. What woman didn’t want to look her best when she was about to talk with a man as sexy as Shane Conner?

His behavior today would determine where they’d go from here.

He’d seemed cold last night when he’d walked out of her room. However, she’d seen a softness in him, a look of sincerity in his eyes, that she hadn’t seen before. Question was, would he make a good father?

Would he even want to be a father to their child?

Following the street signs, she took the next left onto Eisenhower. The row of cookie-cutter, white ranch-style houses lining the street reminded her of the neighborhood she’d grown up in. Quiet and safe. She found the number and pulled her car in front of a house with a red door.

Climbing out of the car, she did a quick finger comb through her hair then made her way up the cracked sidewalk. The impulse to run hadn’t affected her until she made it to the porch steps. This was her decision. No one forced her to have the meeting. She could leave and go back to her life and raise their child alone. Being a bright, successful woman, earning a moderate income as a journalist, she could support a baby. Child support wasn’t her motivation–or that she needed mental or emotional support. If she left, she doubted Shane would search for her, although he knew where she lived. Did he even believe she was pregnant by him? So, why didn’t she get back into her car, switch the engine back on and drive the hell off the base and back into her own quiet, secure life?

She’d opened the can of worms; no backing out now. She owed it to her baby.

If he told her he had no interest in being a father, she’d walk away, no strings attached. Hell, if she searched her emotions, she probably expected the worst. With a short mantra of assurance that she could do this, she knocked on the red door. The door came open. He met her with a cautious smile and a narrowed eye. Just as she’d figured, he wasn’t happy to see her. Now what? Would they go through the same rigmarole as they had last night?

He shifted and her gaze slipped over him. His tight black tee fit his upper body, showing off his toned muscles. His worn jeans fit low on his hips and had a rip a few inches above his knee. She had a sudden urge to reach out and touch the exposed skin, betting he was warm and–

Damn, the man was poison–and virile and tempting. He should come with a warning tattooed across his forehead: Danger.

“You look like you’re debating whether you should run or puke, and neither is too appealing,” he said with a smile.

She snapped back to reality and out of his pants–so to speak. “If I’d planned to run, I’d have done it before I knocked. And puking, well, I can’t guarantee your safety on that one.” Honesty was the best policy. Her stomach was a bit woozy.

“At least you came.” He kicked the door open wider with a bare foot. “Let’s get you in here and closer to the toilet in case you get an urge to upchuck.”

“Did you think I’d chicken out?” she muttered, not making a move to enter.

“Possibly, or I thought maybe this was all a joke.”

“I wouldn’t joke about something like this,” she said.

His eyebrow went up. “And I’m supposed to know that? I have no clue what your morals and values are. This wouldn’t be the first time a woman lied to rope a man.”

She straightened her back. “You didn’t question my values while we were naked in bed, did you? A little late now, wouldn’t you say?”

His expression remained blank, she’d give him that, but the slight tensing of his jaw told her he didn’t have a good comeback. “Shall we discuss this issue here on the sidewalk?” he asked.

“I’d rather not.”

Stepping back against the wall, he gave her room to pass. This must be like going into the lion’s den. Only danger lurked in an animal’s lair.

She glanced around the room, expecting a bachelor pad with mood lighting, big screen TV, beer bottles and whatever else Shane liked. Yet, it wasn’t anything like she’d anticipated. The place was clean. Not just clean, but eat-off-the-floor spotless. From brown leather couch, to the glass coffee tables and wooden floor, everything appeared immaculate. The Shane she’d met in Florida had talked freely of his likes–playing video games on the flat screen, beer and dirt bikes. His home lacked any evidence of the toys.

“Something wrong?” he asked from behind her.

Facing him, she started to make an excuse, but decided she had nothing to prove but the truth. “Nice and clean. Surprising.”

With an amused expression, he said. “Yes, it’s clean. And I do have an inside toilet, I eat with utensils and I bathe.” With a shove of his elbow, the door slammed. She was locked inside. No turning back. “I’m not used to being a gentlemanly host either, at least that’s what I’ve heard, but can I get you anything? A drink? Maybe a new, more flattering representation of who I am?”

A smile teased the corner of her lips but she pushed it away. “No, but I’ll take a seat if that’s okay.”

“So, you’re planning on staying a while?”

Ignoring the quip, she took a seat on the sofa.

He remained standing, staring at her. She had to crane her neck at a weird angle to see his face and it made her nauseous. He took a seat, not on the couch but the chair, relaxed into the leather cushions and propped his bare feet up on the coffee table. The man never appeared unnerved, and it bothered her. And he had nice feet, which annoyed her more.

“I’ll be here long enough for the two of us to discuss what needs to happen now.”

His eyes penetrated into her.

She tugged the hem of her skirt lower on her thighs. Irritation clawed at her. She should know him some. After all, they’d slept together and created a baby. Yet, she felt like she’d never met him before yesterday. The difference wasn’t just his personality. His physical features too. Was it the strong set of his angular jaw? Maybe the slight curve of the bridge of his nose where it appeared to have been broken? Or possibly the thin white scar on his cheek marring the otherwise golden olive complexion?

The area between his eyebrows crinkled. “You aren’t going to get sick are you?”

Jasmine pulled herself out of her perplexing thoughts and gave her head a quick shake. “Please stop asking me that. I’m fine. I…let’s just get this over with.” She smoothed her clammy hands down her legs. “I’m not asking for money, or even responsibility or obligation. I just want to make that clear. I want nothing.”

Rubbing his clean-shaven jaw, he kept his eyes in a probing stare on her. He was a cautious man, obviously. That hadn’t been her first impression of him during the interview for the magazine. He’d seemed more free spirited. “When a woman hunts a man down, corners him in the restroom and later breaks the news that she is carrying his child, well, it would seem to most people that she wants something.”

She swept a lock of hair behind her ear. “I guess my approach was a little awkward. It wasn’t any less awkward when you pretended you didn’t know me. You seemed pretty good at indifference.”

“Awkward?” His brow shot up in accusation. “I’d say downright over the top. You caught me off guard and I was preoccupied, not indifferent.”

Feeling her cheeks heat up, she moistened her lips and took a deep breath. “After the way you left me–”

“Left you?”

“In the middle of the night? The note you’d left–it was egotistical and rude.” Laying her palms in her lap, she noticed that she trembled. She threaded her fingers so he wouldn’t see. “Sure, we weren’t expecting it to lead to anything, but things happen…it did. Although you did make a small promise–”

“Promise?”

“Are you going to continue to repeat everything I say? I am speaking English.” She snorted in frustration.

“I’m not a promising sorta guy. Or a marriage type, either.”

Squinting, she wondered if this was his way of testing her. “You told me that you wanted to take me to breakfast the next morning and then we’d part as friends. Not marriage. If you think I’m here with plans for a relationship, you’re mistaken. In fact, I wouldn’t have gone to breakfast with you even if you’d followed through.”

“That’s not a promise,” he said.

“Of course you’d say that,” she snapped.

Dropping his feet to the floor, he planted his elbows on his knees and propped his chin on one fist. She got a whiff of a woodsy scent and shampoo. His gaze held her face, but somehow it seemed to target the area between her thighs. Tingles erupted inside her stomach. Her body betrayed her mind. How could she want a man with his track record of love ’em and leave ’em? The pregnancy hormones caused the flare-up of need in the core of her body. The one thing she wanted from him was confirmation of his ability as a father, not as a partner.

“I’m a little confused, darling. Are you here to give me shit for making a so-called promise for eggs and bacon? Or, did you just want to tell me that I’m responsible for making a baby?”

Her jaw ached to drop, but she didn’t dare show emotion. She had a feeling he’d enjoy getting a rise from her. “I’m over the make-a-promise-then-run thing.” Waving a hand in the air, she blew off his sarcasm. “I didn’t miss you when you left. What we’d shared in bed was a blip on the radar of a forgotten night.”

One corner of his mouth curved. “Is that so? Then why are you angry?”

“Angry? Maybe I have reason to be. You left me a note like I was nothing more than–”

“A blip, perhaps?” He wiggled his brows. “Maybe it’d be best just to clear the air and admit you were wanting seconds.”

He teased her, or did he really think she wanted him? His eyes glistened and his smile broadened as if he found this entertaining.

“I assure you, Shane Conner, I do not give a hoot about you–or your body parts.” Her gaze automatically dropped to his zipper. “It’s my moral obligation to tell you that during our time together we conceived a child. Just that simple.”

“The paper you gave me says you’re eleven weeks.”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you come sooner?”

“Because I just found out myself a short time ago. Then it took me another week and a half to decide if I wanted to share the news with you.”

“Were you hoping I’d jump up and down in glee at the concept of becoming a father?” His eyes narrowed.

“Is this an interrogation?”

“I have a right to ask these questions,” he said.

“Sure you do, but if you’re trying to figure out if I’m truly pregnant, then you should have called the doctor.” She didn’t like being treated like an enemy.

“What makes you think the doctor would have told me anything? Isn’t that against some medical code of law?” he asked.

“In most cases, probably so. But when the doctor is a very good friend of mine, and he knows the circumstances, he’s doing this as a favor. I even left a message on his phone letting him know to expect your call. Does that mean you didn’t call?”

“I did. Doc confirmed your pregnancy.”

“Then you should stop wasting your energy. If you’re not interested in being a father, that’s okay. I can do this alone.”

“Did I say that I didn’t want to be the father to your child?” He blew out a long sigh. “I would never drop the ball on my responsibility.”

* * * *

Shawn had no clue what in the hell he was getting himself into. Shane’s responsibilities had become his. That’s what brothers were for, especially when one brother wasn’t around to handle the situation.

He believed Jasmine. No doubt, she’d had an intimate encounter with Shane. She had no reason to lie. However, he didn’t know why his brother had given her the idea they could spend the following morning together. Shane had orders to ship out for a year. Any soldier knew he couldn’t make plans when he shipped out on deployment.

Jasmine didn’t fit Shane’s usual type. This woman even seemed to have a mind and an idea of what she wanted in life. Shane tended to gravitate toward women who didn’t use brain cells. Shawn had a long mental list of questions he wanted to ask this strange woman who’d popped into his life, especially the conversation she’d had with his brother, because she might be the last person who’d seen him. He had to be careful, though and not disclose to her he wasn’t Shane, at least not until his crash cleared. Shawn had no clue how long the investigation would take. He didn’t want to be deceitful, and didn’t view what he was doing as a lie. And when the time came, he’d tell her who he was.

In the meantime, he’d help her out in any way he could. He’d be a father to her child…his brother’s child.

Smoothing his hand over his hair, he swallowed the nervous tightness in his throat. For now, he had to protect Jasmine. She carried his brother’s child, his family. “I want to be a father.” His lips quivered with the words. They actually didn’t hurt though like he’d expected.

Her eyes rounded. “Huh? You do? That’s a surprise.”

Damn, this woman didn’t have much of an opinion of him, or his brother, or both of them. Feeling guilt because he shared his brother’s gene pool wasn’t fair. Shawn had never been the type to charm a woman into bed, then bounce out at morning light. He wanted to tell Jasmine that he’d grown tired of her pointing her finger at him like he were scum of the earth. “Again, your opinion of me is flattering.”

“During your interview with me, you laughed when I asked about children in the future. You seemed dead set against having any. Last night, you seemed cold when I’d told you. You even mentioned that I should ‘take care of it.’”

“I didn’t say it quite like that.” He swallowed. Maybe he had. Yet, now he wanted the baby. Sure, he wasn’t the father, and eventually he’d have to tell her, but for now he was the closest thing to one.

“Give me some credit. Think of the circumstances. How would most men respond with news of that caliber?” Did he see a glimpse of relief cross her features? Bright eyes stared back at him and he swore she melted his layers of steel.

“Okay, I’ll give you that. I handled it poorly myself. In fact, I wasn’t even sure at first if I wanted to keep it. Feelings change, though, after the truth has time to sink in. But…where do we go from here?” Silence surrounded them.

“You move to Texas,” he blurted. Oh fuck. He’d actually said the words. What the hell? Had he lost his mind? He gave himself a mental ass-kicking. And by her shocked expression, he guessed she thought he’d lost his mind. Perhaps he had.

“Can’t do that. No possible way,” she said.

She was right. He opened his mouth to agree, but the words didn’t come. If she left, how could he keep her safe? Keep the baby safe? She carried his flesh and blood. That made all the difference in the world. “Why not?”

Her jaw tightened. “I have a career. I have–”

He lifted his brow. “You have what? Family? A boyfriend? I guess I didn’t think of that. Something like another man’s baby would be hard to explain.”

Her bright eyes dulled. That faraway expression reminded him of himself. She was alone, just like he’d been for a while. His mother and father were dead. Now Shane too. His throat tightened. He had been alone until now. He had another living being to think about.

“No one is keeping me from moving here.” She cleared her throat. “But asking me to move here is a lot.”

He wondered how he could convince her that moving was right for him. A vibration on his thigh stopped him. He grabbed his cell from his pocket and offered her an apologetic frown. “Damn technology. I should take this.”

“Sure. Should I leave?” She started to get up.

“No, stay.” He hit Talk. “Conner here.”

“Holbert here.”

“Why the hell you calling me, Airman? Today’s my day off.” First day he’d had off in weeks, since the accident. He still couldn’t get away. Shawn grimaced as he listened to the other man complaining about a problem back at the shop. “Shit! I’ll be there in a few. And tell the other boys to keep their grimy hands off my girl or I’ll shoot them.” Punching the off button, he shoved the phone back into his pocket.

“Duty calls?” Jasmine asked.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that. I’ve got to run.” He jumped up and she stood also.

“I’ll jot down your number–”

“I’ll give it to you later. Give me two minutes to get changed and we’ll head out.” He started for the stairs.

“I’ll go ahead and get out of your way.” She took a quick step toward the door.

“I thought you’d go with me.” Shawn guessed he hadn’t made himself clear enough. Communication wasn’t his strong point. He’d always been good at barking orders and never talking.

“Go with you? Uhh, sounds like a woman issue and I’d rather not get involved.” She edged closer to the door.

Woman issue? Then he understood and laughed. “Trust me, it’s a girl problem, but not with one that’ll talk back. Give me two, okay?” Rushing up the stairs, he didn’t give her time to argue.

Without thought, he broke into an upbeat whistle.