Читать книгу Last Wolf Hunting - Rhyannon Byrd, Rhyannon Byrd - Страница 10

Chapter 4

The seeking touch of his lips against hers was a provocative answer to the churning want that had raged through Jillian’s body for so long. Through so many sleepless nights, and so many frustratingly empty days, when she’d found herself surrounded by people…and yet, utterly alone.

“Jeremy, please,” she whispered, tearing her mouth away. “Don’t do this.”

He kissed the fragile skin beneath her eye, the sharp edge of her jaw. “Do what?”

“I won’t give in,” she gasped, feeling him nip the sensitive tendon at the side of her throat. “I can’t.” She could hear the desperation in her voice, and knew he could, as well.

His lips moved in a soft, deliciously erotic caress against her skin as he spoke. “You’re letting your fear control you, Jillian.”

“What do you know about fear?” she demanded, her voice cracking, bleak with emotion.

“I know it scares the hell out of me,” he confessed in a gritty rasp, his breath warm and damp, “thinking that I might have lost you during one of those challenges.”

“Damn you, Jeremy.” She tried to stumble back, but was caged in by the thick trunk of the tree, his hard body pressed against her front. He was a dark, raging presence before her, trapping her.

“I’m going to make it hard as hell for you to deny me,” he warned in a ragged tumble of words. Then his mouth claimed hers again, angry and hot and hungry.

Sweet Jesus. She couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. But who cared? He made it so much more than a mere kiss. It felt too intimate, too carnal, like the decadent, provocative things he did to her in her dreams.

Jillian knew she should push him away, but more than that, she wanted to pull him closer. The details, so shocking and electric, overwhelmed her. The sexy, slightly rough texture of his lips. The silken stroke of his talented tongue. She could taste his hunger, his heat, and it was like going under…falling into him. Everything pulsed through her with a sharp, shattering awareness. And yet, she was lost, floating, her head fuzzy with the rioting sensations as his tongue claimed her mouth more deeply, the kiss slow and eating and deliciously sweet, like warm, melting honey.

She moaned, giving up, rubbing her tongue against his, and everything changed.

With a low, hoarse curse, Jeremy crushed her breasts with the muscular wall of his chest, while taking deeper possession of her mouth. It was something decadent, hungry and invasive, the way he penetrated her, shoving past any resistance, smashing it beneath his dark, persuasive need… Only, she wasn’t resisting. Not anymore.

Jillian trembled, gasping. He growled low in his throat, moving against her, and she could feel the hard proof of his erection, long and thick enough to make her breath catch. Her hands lifted, the cool tips of her fingers touching in a butterfly caress against the scorching heat of his cheekbones, and she flinched from the warmth of his skin.

“Touch me,” Jeremy groaned against the corner of her mouth, nipping at her bottom lip, then diving back into the kiss with a breathtaking intensity that made her toes curl. “Put your goddamn hands on me, Jillian.”

The shaken, guttural words slipped through her system like a dizzying rush of pleasure, all but making her purr. God, yes, she wanted to. Wanted to put her hands on the hard, lean lines of his magnificent body and learn him by touch, taking him in the way someone who’d lost their sight could lose themselves in another world through Braille. He was an unknown landscape she wanted to explore until she was privy to all its secrets, until it was so much a part of her she knew it better than she knew herself.

Jillian slipped her tongue past his lips, lost in the dark, honeyed sweetness of his taste, and took the aggressive sound he made into her mouth at the same time she pressed the flat of her palms against his ribs, fingers splayed, wanting to touch as much of him as possible. His body communicated its hunger through his skin, burning her, even with the barrier of his shirt between them. But she wanted flesh. Wanted to feel the silken texture of his skin, the blond whirl of hair that circled his navel, then trailed in a daring arrow toward the blatant, rigid proof of his lust.

Moaning deep in her throat, Jillian slipped her hands under the hem of his shirt and clasped his hot skin at his sides, just above the waistband of his jeans. His breath shuddered in his chest and he panted against her lips as he pulled away from the kiss, pressing his forehead against hers. The hunger and chaotic mix of emotion Jillian had always carried for this one man surged through her, filling her up, giving her the courage to do what she’d never done before.

Now, she didn’t have a choice. Her body wouldn’t let her fight what her heart knew was going to hurt her in the end. Biting her lower lip, she trailed her fingertips to the waistband of his jeans, then slowly stroked them inward. Any second now she was going to touch that intimate, powerful part of him that she’d never explored when younger. A fine sheen of sweat coated his skin, his flesh burning hotter. His lips pulled back over his teeth and he stopped breathing.

Her fingers pulled closer…closer…and then she heard her name being called out over the eerie silence of the forest.

“Jillian? Are you out there?”

She wrenched her hands away and shoved against his chest. “Sayre?” she tried to shout, breathless, wondering how she’d let herself get into this situation. She lifted her wide gaze and almost jumped from the searing look of lust darkening his eyes. His jaw locked, and he finally reacted to her pushing hands, taking a step away, the front of her body left chilled at the loss of his incredible heat.

It terrified her, how badly she wanted to pull him back to her.

Taking her hands from the firm muscles of his chest, Jillian pressed them to her sides, and tried to find a measure of calm, even while her heart hammered out a vicious tempo beneath her ribs. “Sayre?” she called out again. “Where are you?”

“Right here,” her sister answered, the last word trailing off as the young woman stepped into the small glade and caught sight of them. “Oops,” she whispered, blushing, her blue-gray eyes wide with surprise. The ends of her curly, strawberry-blond hair just grazed her jaw, completing the fey look created by her unique features. Her nose was delicate, her chin sharp, jawline almost fragile. Her skin was as luminous as a pearl, the arc of her cheekbones always flushed with a wild color of rose because Sayre could never move at a normal pace. She was boundless energy and exuberance, like a hummingbird always flitting from one spot to another. But she was wise beyond her years, her big eyes steady and calm within the thick fringe of her lashes. She was a wild spirit with a pure heart who never let others down, and she was the closest friend Jillian had ever had.

“Um, sorry,” Sayre murmured, her curious gaze moving from one to the other. Jillian tried to avoid blushing, but knew her face was crimson. “I was so focused on finding you, I didn’t pick up on the fact that you aren’t alone.”

“It’s okay,” Jillian said firmly, stepping out from between the tree and Jeremy’s body, needing the space to breathe. “Jeremy and I were just—”

Before she could finish the thought, Jeremy took a step toward her sister, his green eyes full of startled surprise. “Sayre?” he whispered, while a slow grin curved his mouth. “I don’t believe it. Is that really you?”

A wry smile curled across Sayre’s mouth, and she ducked her head shyly. “Hi, Jeremy.”

“You were just a scrawny little runt the last time I saw you.”

Sayre’s musical laughter filled the glade, and it made Jillian’s heart hurt to think of how her sister had always followed Jeremy around when she was little, as worshipful as an adoring puppy. Sayre had been crushed when he’d left Shadow Peak, and it’d been so hard to explain to the little girl why he wasn’t coming back. “Yeah, well, that was a long time ago,” she said with an easy grace, obviously trying to put them at ease. “Not that I’ve ever managed to outgrow the scrawny thing. I may be taller, but I still look like a toothpick.”

“Naw. You’ve grown into a beautiful young woman. I bet you have all the boys chasing after you.”

“Hardly.” She laughed. “But it’s sweet of you to say so.”

“Is everything okay?” Jillian asked, irritated with herself for the tiny flair of jealousy she felt at their easy camaraderie. “You know I don’t like you leaving Shadow Peak on Challenge Nights. It isn’t safe.”

Sayre nodded. “Yeah, I know. But I had to make sure you were okay.”

“I’m fine. How did you find me?”

Sayre’s cheeks flushed, and she ducked her chin. “It wasn’t hard, Jilly. You were broadcasting pretty loudly.”

Jeremy arched a questioning brow in Jillian’s direction. “Sayre’s still growing into her powers,” she explained quietly, “but they’re already very strong.”

“Obviously,” he murmured, staring, and Jillian knew he was wondering just how strong her own powers had grown in the past decade.

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Sayre said cautiously, flicking a nervous glance toward Jeremy, “but I wanted to let you know that Eric was waiting at your house. He heard about what happened at the clearing and wanted to come looking for you. It wasn’t easy, but I, um, convinced him to head home and let me check on things. I told him you’d call him later.”

“Eric who?” Jeremy questioned, at the same time Jillian whispered, “Hell.”

“Eric who?” he repeated, the words sharper this time.

“Um, Eric Drake,” Sayre said too brightly, wincing when she caught sight of Jillian’s glare.

Jeremy’s eyes narrowed to slits. “Why would Drake be waiting at your house for you?”

Jillian opened her mouth, then snapped it shut. “Not to sound rude, but that really isn’t any of your business.”

“Wrong answer,” he said silkily. “I’m making it my business.”

“I’m not doing this in front of Sayre,” she warned him in a quiet voice.

“All I want is an answer to my question.” Jillian could hear the silent for now tacked onto the end of his statement.

“We’re…friends.”

“You and Drake?” he rasped, his tone full of disbelief and the hard, biting edge of anger. “Since when?”

“A few months now,” she explained awkwardly, alarmed at the way he stumbled back a step, his expression little more than a hard mask, giving nothing away. But his eyes were like a window into his soul, and she knew the idea of her with Eric caused him pain. For years, she’d thought she’d take satisfaction in seeing him hurt, but she’d been wrong. Instead, his pain cut at her like a knife, jabbing and sharp, while shame pooled thickly in her belly.

“Why?” He didn’t need to say more. She knew exactly what he meant.

Her hands fluttered nervously at her sides, and she wished she was wearing jeans so that she could hide them in her pockets. “We started working together on a few of the new reform committees for education and housing. We ended up spending so much time together that we’ve become…close—”

“If you two are so close,” he interrupted, taking a step forward, hands planted on his hips, “why wasn’t he there tonight?” His lip curled in cruel sneer, but she could see the burn of a darker emotion in the deep, smoky green of his eyes. Jealousy burned harder than anger or fear or arrogance, blurring the edges so that only the source flared through, sizzling and sharp.

Jillian lifted her chin. “I asked him not to come. And he respects my wishes.”

“I’ll bet he does,” he snorted, the rude sound making her teeth grind.

She shot a meaningful look at her little sister. “Maybe it would be better if we finished this argument some other time, Jeremy.”

“Yeah.” He grunted under his breath and started to move away, then paused, his expression intent as he stepped closer and leaned down to whisper in her ear. Then he pulled away, gave Sayre a friendly nod of goodbye, and headed back into the forest.

Sayre walked quietly by Jillian’s side as they made their way back to Shadow Peak, until the silence finally became unbearable. “You want to say something?” Jillian huffed, too on edge to be reasonable. “If so, please just spit it out and get it over with.”

Her sister’s slender shoulders lifted in a shrug. “Not really.”

“Come on,” Jillian groaned. “I can feel it, Sayre. After the night I’ve had, I don’t have the energy to drag it out of you.”

“I just… You’re fighting it, aren’t you?” Sayre turned her head, staring at her with solemn eyes that saw too much for a seventeen-year-old. “You love him, Jilly, but you don’t want to. I think you want to give him another chance, but you’re too afraid.”

“It doesn’t matter what I want. There’s too much history between me and Jeremy. A future between us would be impossible, so it’s best if we just stay away from each other.” Though avoiding him was going to be hard to do, considering it looked as if they were going to be working together, but she kept that thought to herself.

“But he’s your mate,” Sayre murmured, lifting one delicate hand to drag softly through the changing leaves on the low-hanging branches, sending them tumbling from their perches. They fell a short distance, before being swept up in the chilly wind and carried away…and Jillian wished her troubles could be dealt with so easily. Just brushed off and swept away, floating out of existence like a cloud. “That means you’re meant to be together,” Sayre added. “Nothing good can come of fighting it.”

“And one of the things you’ll learn as you get older is that things don’t always turn out the way they’re meant to.”

Sayre made a soft sound of frustration under her breath. “Maybe they would, if we were brave enough to fight for what we wanted.”

Despite the headache pounding through her skull, Jillian grinned. “You sound like an idealist, Sayre. I hope you never grow out of it.”

It took her a moment to realize that her sister was no longer keeping pace at her side. When she stopped and turned around, she found Sayre standing beneath an ethereal beam of moonlight, her slender frame vibrating with tension. Her usual easygoing smile had been replaced by a pinched look of temper that had Jillian blinking in surprise.

“Stop talking to me as if I’m a child, because I’m not one anymore. I know you don’t want to admit it, but I’m growing up, Jillian. I’m growing up and I have a brain that’s fully capable of functioning. I can form my own opinions and beliefs, and I can see more than others. I can see what’s really happening between you and Jeremy, even if you won’t admit it. And I know why. I—I know about mother.”

A soft breath jerked out of her lungs, and Jillian shook her head as if to clear it. “What?”

“Mother told me, when I turned sixteen. She wanted me to understand what had happened to her so that I would know to be careful.”

“What did she tell you?” Jillian asked, wondering what strange cosmic event had occurred in the universe tonight to throw her world into such chaos. She’d been on a steady, even keel for so long, allowing herself to feel so little—and now she felt battered by emotional waves, struggling to stay afloat in an endless, surging sea of commotion.

“All of it, Jillian. About the Lycan she fell in love with while away at school, about giving her virginity to him and about how he turned away from her even though he knew she loved him. Even though he knew how she felt, he used her and then abandoned her, because he’d only been looking to have some fun. He didn’t love her in return. She told me that he was your father, and that after he left, she didn’t think she’d ever love again. And then she came back to the pack and set eyes on Dad, and that was all it took. She not only found her lifemate, but a man who returned her love and one who was more than happy to accept you and love you like his own daughter. She told me…everything.”

The center of Jillian’s chest hurt as if she’d been kicked, and her hand pressed against it in an instinctual move to hold in the rapid pounding of her heart. “I didn’t know that you knew,” she whispered, wincing at the scratchy sound of her voice. “You never said anything.”

“Mother asked me not to tell you that she’d told me, but I think it’s something that needs to be discussed.”

“Why?” she asked bitterly. “What good is going to come from it?”

“Because it’s affecting your life, Jillian.” Sayre tilted her head to the side, her blue-gray eyes luminous and bright in the silvery moonlight. “I think you’re taking Mother’s warnings to heart, aren’t you? Because of what happened to her, you’re afraid of following your heart. You’ve always been afraid.”

She frowned, knowing it wasn’t that simple. “There’s more to it than that, Sayre. I have my responsibility to the pack, which isn’t one to take lightly. The League has never made any secret about their feelings on the subject, and I have to agree with them. Jeremy isn’t the type to make a sacrifice for others. He would have demanded I stay away from Shadow Peak and abandon those who rely on me. And you know what kind of reputation he has. Any woman foolish enough to trust him is just that. A fool.”

Sayre gave her a sad smile. “You don’t believe in the power of love? In its strength?”

“You sound like a romantic,” she muttered, feeling too old and worn-out, as if her youth had been dried up in heartbreak and bitterness.

“I am, Jillian. I’ve seen love. I’ve seen commitment and fidelity and a metaphysical union of the souls.” Sayre gave a little grin. “However you want to describe it, it does exist. All you have to do is look at Mother and Father to see th—”

“He’s not my father.”

For the first time in her life, Jillian watched her sister’s face flush with anger. “Don’t ever let me hear you say that again, because it makes you sound like an idiot. He loves you like his own. Anyone can see that.”

“I’m sorry,” she breathed out, the shaky timbre of the words betraying her real emotions. “You’re right. He does love me. I know that. I’m just…upset tonight, Sayre. This really isn’t a good time for me.”

“Jillian, the one who protects her heart from fear of loss ends up with no heart at all. Just an empty chest, because she has nothing to lose. I love you too much to see that happen to you. Look inside yourself. Jeremy may be bold and arrogant, but he’s a good person. I think you’ve let the warnings and fears of the League bleed into your heart and have judged him unfairly. How could you know what he’s willing to sacrifice for you, when you’ve never given him the chance? And you’re already in pain from being near him and not having him. What could be worse?”

“What could be worse?” Jillian repeated, wiping angrily at the hot, stinging wash of tears she could feel gathering at the corners of her eyes. “How about loving him and discovering that he doesn’t love me the same way?”

Sayre shook her head sadly, while the wind caught at her pale curls and tousled them around her fey face. “I’ve always thought you were the bravest person I know,” she said sadly, “but you sound like a coward, Jillian.”

Her mouth twisted into a wry expression that felt more like a grimace than a smile. “You’re probably right.” She took a deep breath, then jerked her head toward the direction of home. “Now, come on and let me walk you back. Mother is going to freak if you stay out past your curfew.”

When they reached their parents’ house, Sayre unlatched the gate, walked through and then closed it behind her. “He wants you, Jillian. And he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to give up once he sets his mind on something.”

“I know,” she murmured, recalling his earlier words. He wanted her for sex—nothing more. And he’d reminded her of the fact he meant to have her with those last whispered words in her ear.

Taking a deep breath, Jillian lifted her face to stare at the moon, as had become her habit over the years. She could lose herself in its soothing light, imagine she was some other woman…in some other life…with a heart that didn’t belong to a man she could never have. “That’s what I’m afraid of.”

“No, it’s not,” Sayre said softly. “What you’re afraid of is that you won’t be able to resist him forever.”

Jillian closed her eyes as the truth of those words spread through her. By the time she opened them, she stood alone under the milky glow of the moon, the only sound that of the front door closing softly behind her sister.