Читать книгу When Boys Kiss Boys - Richard Crlik - Страница 9

The following morning Hope was awake early. She made a pot of coffee and sat out on the verandah. The rising suns rays reflecting off the raindrops which still clung to the leaves on the gum trees. Somewhere deep in the bush she could hear the long musical echo of the Whip birds, claiming their territory anew. Closer the melodious chimes of the Currawongs reverberated. Familiar, beautiful sounds.

She felt as fresh and clear as the new morning. She decided against a second cup of coffee and instead went into the guest bedroom, throwing open the sliding doors to let the fresh, crisp morning air in. She had always liked this room with its expansive views of the bush and of the houses dotted between the trees as the road wound back along and up the valley.

Originally they had designed the house with this room as the master bedroom, sharing the floor with the open living areas at the back of the house, and the main bathroom and study which lay at either end facing the road. They had quickly seen the issues of leaving Ben, then seven years old, all alone downstairs by himself at night and plans had changed.

This bedroom became the guest room with the stroke of a pen, and with some plan modifications their bedroom had been moved downstairs, complete with an en-suite bathroom, at the opposite end of the building from Ben's room. In between an open 'family room' connected the two and opened on to the stairway at the back and the first of many terraced garden levels at the front.

She had decided last night, and Mrs T had agreed, that if she was going to stay in the house that she should move to the upstairs bedroom. She had hardly slept in their bedroom since the accident. Most nights falling into intoxicated slumber on the lounge as she drank yet another glass trying to summon up the courage to sleep in her and Peter's bed. It was time to start afresh and this was the first step in facing her new world.

By the time Ben had woken, an hour or so later, Hope had moved all of her clothes upstairs and into their new home. Her toiletries were now filling the bathroom next door and only a large pile of books and magazines lay strewn on the floor. She would have to buy a new book stand or get some shelves put up. Plenty of time for that.

As Ben made a pot of tea and cooked toast Hope sat at the breakfast bar watching him, smoking a cigarette and justifying her decision.

'Honestly darling, I can't sleep in that other room and besides you will be able to have the whole downstairs to yourself now. If you want we can get a door put into the en-suite so you wont have to go through my old room to use it. You can do what you want in there. Maybe you could use it as a study?"

'It's alright mum. I think it will be good for you to move up here. Not that I want your room or anything, but I know it must be hard for you to go in there. Let's just make it the new guest room and I can use the upstairs bathroom when we have people over to stay.'

'Darling, is it okay to leave things in there as they are for a while? I honestly can't face having to sort through your father's things yet.'

'Mum, whatever you need to do just do it. If you need help just ask. I was thinking last night maybe I should take these last two weeks off school and stick around at home with you. We've finished all our subjects and they are only doing revision with us. It's kind of a bore anyway.'

'Oh Ben, I want you to do what you think is best. I'm okay honestly. I would love to have you here, but I really am okay. I promise I wont fall back on my wicked ways. It was selfish of me and I can't imagine how hard I have made things for you. I'm so sorry, I was only thinking of myself. You poor darling."

'I wasn't saying that just so I could check up on you, honestly. I'm just sorry that I sort of shut you out and left you on your own. I didn't want to, I just didn't know what to do or say'. Ben choked back the tears as he continued.

'I loved him Mum, but I love you more. I can't explain better, but I just want you to be okay. I don't care if you need stuff to make it that way. I just want to be there for you'....The tears flowed, unchecked down the boys face.

'Darling, oh my darling boy, how could I not be okay when I have you? She extended her arms out towards him. ' Hold me darling. Hold mummy. Everything's going to be fine.'

Ben clung to Hope, the tears finally escaping, the relief of having his mother back overwhelming him. He would never tell her the truth. He loved her too much to see her hurt again.