Читать книгу Serafina and the Black Cloak - Robert Beatty - Страница 10

Serafina rushed up to her father in the workshop and grabbed his arm. Trying to talk and catch her breath at the same time, she gasped, ‘Pa, there’s a girl missing just like I said, and Mr Vanderbilt’s searching the whole house!’ Her words tumbled out with a mixture of urgency and pride. As she hurriedly reminded him of what she’d seen the night before, she was sure that he’d see now that she wasn’t dreaming or making up stories.

‘They’re searchin’ the house?’ he asked, ignoring everything else. He turned and quickly gathered his cooking supplies and razor from the bench, then dragged her mattress into the hidden area he’d constructed behind the tool rack. There could be no evidence of their living there when the search party came through.

‘What about the girl I saw disappear?’ she asked in confusion. She couldn’t figure out why he wasn’t more interested in what she was telling him.

‘Children don’t just disappear, Sera,’ he said as he continued his efforts.

Her heart sank. He still didn’t believe her.

Her pa looked around the room one last time to make sure he hadn’t missed anything, and then he looked at her. For a moment, she thought he was finally going to listen to what she was saying, but then he pointed at her hairbrush and snapped, ‘For God’s sake, girl, pick up your things!’

‘But what about the Man in the Black Cloak?’ she argued.

‘I don’t want you thinking about anything like that,’ he barked. ‘It was nothing but a nightmare. Now hush up.’

She flinched from the words. She couldn’t understand why he was being so mean. But she could hear the worry in his voice along with the anger, and in the distance she could hear the search party coming down the stairs. She knew it wasn’t just the threat of discovery that scared him. He hated any talk of the supernatural or any sort of dark and fiendish forces out in the world that he couldn’t fix with his wrenches, hammers and screwdrivers.

‘But it’s real!’ she demanded. ‘The girl’s actually gone, Pa. I’m telling the truth!’

‘A little girl’s got herself lost, that’s it, and they’re lookin’ for her, so they’ll find her, wherever she is. Get your wits about you. People don’t just vanish. She’s gotta be someplace.’

She stood in the centre of the room. ‘I think we should both go out there right now and tell them everything I saw,’ she declared boldly.

‘No, Sera,’ he said. ‘They’ll spit nails if they find me livin’ down here. They’ll fire me. Do you understand that? And God knows what they’ll make of you. They don’t even know you’re alive, and we’re gonna keep it that way. I’m talkin’ to you dead straight now, girl. You hear me?’

The sound of the search party could be heard down the corridor, and it was coming their way.

Clenching her teeth, she shook her head in frustration and stood before him. ‘Why, Pa? Why? Why can’t people see me?’ She didn’t have the courage to tell him that at least one Vanderbilt already had, and that he knew her name. ‘Just tell me, Pa, whatever it is. I’m twelve years old. I’m grown up. I deserve to know.’

‘Look, Sera,’ he said, ‘last night, somebody sabotaged the dynamo, did it some real damage that I’m not sure I can mend. If I don’t get it fixed by nightfall, there’s gonna be hell to pay from the boss, and rightly so. The lights, the elevators, the servant-call system – this whole place depends on the Edison machine.’

She tried to imagine someone sneaking into the electrical room and damaging the equipment. ‘But why would someone do that, Pa?’

The search party was making its way through the kitchens and would arrive in the workshop at any moment.

‘I ain’t got time to think about it,’ he said, moving towards her with his huge body. ‘I just gotta get it workin’, that’s all. Now do what I tell ya!’

He charged around the room and hid things with such roughness and loudness and violence that it frightened her. She crept behind the boiler and watched him. She knew that when he was like this she couldn’t get anywhere with him. He just wanted to be left alone to do his job and work on his machines. But it was gnawing at her, and the more she thought about it, the madder she got. She knew it wasn’t the right time to talk to him about everything she’d been thinking and feeling, but she didn’t care. She just blurted it out.

‘I’m sorry, Pa,’ she said. ‘I know you’re busy, but please just tell me why you don’t want anyone to see me.’ She stepped out from behind the boiler and faced him, her voice getting louder now. ‘Why have you been hiding me all these years?’ she demanded. ‘Just tell me what’s wrong with me. I want to know. Why are you ashamed of me?’

By the time she was done, she was practically screaming at him. Her voice was so loud and shrill that it actually echoed.

Her pa stopped dead in his tracks and looked at her. She knew she had finally reached down inside him and grabbed that armoured heart of his. She’d finally stirred him up. She felt a sudden impulse to take it all back and dart behind the boiler again to hide, but she didn’t. She stood before him and looked at him as steadily as she could, her eyes watering.

He stood very still over by the bench, his huge hands balled into fists. A visible wave of pain and despair seemed to pass through him all at once, and for a moment he couldn’t speak.

‘I’m not ashamed of you,’ he said gruffly, his voice strangely hoarse. The searchers were now only one room away.

‘You are,’ she shot back. She was trembling in fear, but she wasn’t going to give up this time. She wanted to shake him. She wanted to shake him to the core. ‘You’re ashamed of me,’ she said again.

He turned away from her so that she couldn’t see his face, just the back of his head and huge, bulky body. Several seconds of silence went by. Then he shook his head like he was arguing with himself, or furious with her, or both – she wasn’t sure.

‘Just keep your mouth shut and follow me,’ he said as he turned and walked out of the room.

Scurrying after him, she caught up with him in the corridor. Her body felt queasy all over. She didn’t know where he was taking her or what was going to happen. She could barely suck in breaths as he led her down the narrow stone stairs to the sub-basement and into the electrical room with the iron dynamo and thick black wires that spidered up the walls. They had left the search party behind them, at least for a little while.

‘We’ll hole up in here,’ he said as he pulled the door shut with a heavy thud and locked them in. As he lit a lantern against the darkness, she’d never seen him look so serious, so grave and pale, and it frightened her.

‘What’s happening, Pa?’ she asked, her voice shaking.

‘Sit down,’ he said. ‘Ya ain’t gonna like what I got to tell ya, but it might help ya understand.’

Serafina swallowed, sat on an old wooden spool of copper wire and prepared herself to listen. Her pa sat on the floor facing her, with his back against the wall. Staring down at the floor and deep in thought, he began to talk.

‘Years ago, I was workin’ as a mechanic in the train yard in Asheville,’ he said. ‘The foreman and his wife had just had their third baby boy and their home was full of joy, but while everyone else celebrated, I sat alone in a kind of self-made misery. I ain’t proud of it, the way I was soppin’ around that night, but things just weren’t workin’ out for me the way they were supposed to in a man’s life. I wanted to meet a good woman, build a house in town and have children of my own, but years had gone by and it hadn’t happened. I was a big man and not much to look at. I sweated all day on the engines, and those few times I encountered any womenfolk I could never find my words. I could talk about nuts and bolts till the mornin’ come, but not much else.’

She opened her mouth to ask a question, but she didn’t want to disrupt the story that was finally pouring out of her pa.

‘That night, while everyone was tipping the jug,’ he continued, ‘I was feelin’ pretty poor, and I headed out. I went for a long walk, just walkin’ like ya do when you got too much on your mind to do naught else. I went deep into the forest, up through River’s Gap and into the mountains. When night came, I just kept walkin’.’

It was hard for her to picture her father travelling through the forest. All those times he had warned her had led her to believe that he would never set foot in the forest. He hated the forest. At least he did now.

‘Were you scared, Pa?’

‘Naw, I weren’t,’ he said, shaking his head and still looking at the floor. ‘But I shoulda been.’

‘Why? What happened?’ She couldn’t even imagine what it was. The flicker of the lantern cast an eerie shadow on his face. She had always loved his stories, but this one felt closer to his heart than any story he had ever told.

‘As I was walkin’ through the woods, I heard a queer howlin’ noise, like an animal in terrible, writhing pain. The bushes were movin’ somethin’ fierce, but I couldn’t quite make out what it was.’

‘Was it somethin’ dyin’, Pa?’ She leaned toward him.

‘I don’t think so,’ he said, looking up at her. ‘The ruckus in the bushes went on for a spell, then the noise stopped all sudden-like. I thought it was over, but then a pair of amber-yellow eyes peered at me from the darkness. Whatever sort of man or beast it was, it circled slowly round me, taking one position and then another, studying me real careful, like it was trying to make a decision about me, whether I was worth eatin’ or just lettin’ be. I sensed a real power behind those eyes. But then the eyes disappeared. The beast was gone. And I heard a strange mewling, crying sound.’

She straightened her back and looked at him. ‘Crying?’ she asked in confusion. That definitely wasn’t what she was expecting.

‘I searched through the bushes. Blood covered the ground, and in the blood lay a pile of small creatures. Three of ’em were dead, but one remained just barely alive.’

She got off the wooden spool and crouched down beside her pa. She stared at him, totally absorbed in his story. In her mind, she could see the bloody creatures on the ground.

‘But what kind of creatures were they?’ she asked in amazement.

He shook his head. ‘Like everyone else who lives in these mountains, I’d heard the stories of black magic, but I never gave them much credit until that night. I studied the one that was still alive the best I could in the darkness, but I still couldn’t figure what kind of thing it was. Or more like my mind just couldn’t believe it. But when I finally took up the creature in my bare hands and held it I realised that it was actually a tiny human baby curled into a little ball.’

Serafina’s eyes opened wide in surprise. ‘What? Wait. I don’t understand. What happened? How did a baby get there?’

‘The same question was runnin’ through my own mind, believe me, but one thing I knew for certain: regardless of how she came into the world, I had to get this baby some help. I bundled her up in my jacket, hiked back down the hill and carried her out of the woods. I took her to the midwives at the convent and begged them to help, but they gasped at the sight of her, muttering that she was the devil’s work. They said she was malformed, near to death and that there was nothing they could do to help her.’

‘But why?’ Serafina cried in outrage. ‘That’s terrible! That’s so mean!’ Just because something looked different didn’t mean you just threw it away. She couldn’t help but wonder what kind of world it was out there. The attitude of the midwives almost bothered her more than the idea of a yellow-eyed beast lurking in the night. But she felt a renewed glimmer of admiration for her pa as she imagined his huge, warm hands wrapped around that tiny little baby’s body, giving it heat, keeping it alive.

Her father took a long, deep, troubled breath as he remembered that night, and then he continued his story. ‘You have to understand the poor little thing had been born with her eyes closed, Sera, and the nuns said that she would never see. She’d been born deaf, and they said she would never hear. And it was plain enough to see that she had four toes on each foot instead of five, but that was the least of it. Her collarbones were malformed, and she had an unnaturally long, curving spine – all twisted-like – and she did not look like she could survive.’

The shock hit her like a blow. She looked up at her father in astonishment. ‘I’m the baby!’ she shouted, leaping to her feet. This wasn’t just a story, this was her story. She’d been born in the forest. That meant her pa had found her and taken her in. She was like a baby fox who’d been raised by a coyote. She stood in front of her pa. ‘I’m the baby!’ she said again.

Her father looked at her, and she saw the truth of it flickering in his eyes, but he didn’t acknowledge it. He didn’t say yes and didn’t say no. It was like he couldn’t reconcile his memory of that dark night with the daughter he had now, and he had to tell the story the only way he could: as if it wasn’t her at all.

‘The bones of the baby’s back weren’t connected to each other the way they should have been,’ he continued. ‘The nuns were half scared out of their wits at the idea of caring for this child, like it was some sort of demon spawn, but to me she was a little baby, a little chitlan, and you didn’t abandon such a thing. Who cares how many toes she had!’

Serafina kneeled on the floor in front of him, trying to understand it all. She was beginning to see the kind of man her father was and maybe where she got some of her own stick-to-it-iveness. But it was all so confusing. How could she get anything from him if she wasn’t even his?

‘I took that baby away, fearin’ them nuns would drown her,’ he said.

‘I hate them nuns,’ she spat. ‘They’re terrible!’

He shook his head, not in disagreement, but more like the nuns didn’t mean anything at all because they were the least of his problems.

‘I didn’t have any proper food,’ he said, ‘so I crept into a farmer’s barn and milked his goat – stole a bottle too. Felt ashamed doin’ these things, but I needed to get some food into her, and I couldn’t see a better road. That night, I fed the little chitlan her first meal, and as bad off as she was, and with her eyes still closed, she drank it down real good, and I remember praying that somehow it’d help. The more I held her and watched her suck down that milk, the more I wanted her to live.’

‘Then what happened?’ She slid closer to him. She knew that outside the locked door of the electrical room, somewhere above them, the lawful inhabitants of Biltmore Estate were searching from room to room, but she didn’t care. ‘Keep goin’, Pa,’ she nudged.

‘I looked for a woman who could mother the baby proper, but none of them would do it. They was sure she was gonna die. But two weeks later, while I was fixin’ an engine with one hand and bottle-feedin’ the chitlan with the other, somethin’ happened. She opened her eyes for the first time and stared straight at me. All I could do was stare right back at her. She had these big, beautiful yellow eyes that just didn’t stop. I knew then and there that I was hers, and she was mine, that we were kin now, and there was no denyin’ it.’

Serafina was so mesmerised by his story that she barely blinked. The yellow eyes that her father spoke of were still looking at him, and they had been for twelve years.

He rubbed his mouth slowly with his hand, looked over at the dynamo, and then continued the story. ‘In the time that followed, I fed the little chitlan every morning and every night. I slept with her tucked under my arm. I nestled her in an open toolbox beside me when I worked. When she started growing up a little, I taught her how to crawl and run about. I was tryin’ my best to take good care of her – she was mine now, you see – but people started askin’ questions and government types started comin’ around. Men with badges and guns. One night when I was out workin’ in the train yard, three of ’em waited until she wandered off a bit, and then they cornered her, trapped her in real tight. They was gonna take her away and put her someplace, God knows where, or maybe worse. I hit the first officer so hard that he went down bleedin’ and he didn’t get up, then I struck the second one and grabbed for the third, but he skedaddled on outta there. The little chitlan was all right, thank God, but I knew we were in trouble. They’d be comin’ back with more men next time, chains for me, and a cage for the chitlan. I knew then that we had to go. We had to escape the pryin’ eyes and yammerin’ mouths in the city, so I quit the train yard and found a new job way up in the mountains, workin’ the construction of a great house.’

She gasped as she realised that he hadn’t just been hiding her; he’d been hiding them. That’s why we’re in the basement, she thought as a wave of relief passed through her. He was protecting her.

‘I took care of her through good times and bad,’ her pa continued, ‘just doin’ everything I could, and over the years the strange little creature that I found in the forest grew up into a fine little girl, and I did my best to forget how she came into the world or how I got her.’

And here, finally, her father paused and looked at her in earnest. ‘And that’s you now, Sera,’ he said. ‘That’s you. It’s plain to see that you’re not like other girls, but you’re not misshapen or hideous like them nuns said you’d be. You’re remarkably graceful in your movements – fast and agile like I’ve never seen. You’re not deaf and blind like they said, but real sharp in your senses. I’ve been protecting you every day for the last twelve years, and the God’s truth: they’ve been the best twelve years of my life. You mean the world to me, girl. There’s no shame here, none at all, just a strong desire to keep us both alive.’

When he stopped and looked at her with his steady dark eyes, she realised that she’d been sobbing, and quickly wiped the tears off her face before he got mad at her for crying. In some ways, she had never felt closer to her pa than at that moment, for his story had snagged her heart, but there was something else roiling up inside her too: her father wasn’t her father. He’d found her in the woods and taken her. He’d been lying to her and everyone else for her entire life. All these years he’d refused to talk about her mother, just let her wonder on and on, and now here it was. The truth. Tears kept streaming down her face. She felt so stupid imagining fancy ladies and her mother forgetting her in a washing machine and all that stuff she used to think about when she was little. She’d spent countless hours wondering where she came from and he had known all this the whole time.

‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ she asked him.

He didn’t answer her.

‘Why didn’t you tell me, Pa?’ she asked again.

Staring at the ground, he shook his head slowly back and forth.

‘Pa . . .’

Finally, he said, ‘Because I didn’t want it to be true.’

She stopped and looked at him in shock. ‘But it is true, Pa. You can’t just wish things aren’t true when they are true!’

‘I’m sorry, Sera,’ he said. ‘I just wanted you to be my little girl.’

She was angry, very angry, but she felt a lump in her throat. He had finally reached deep down into his heart and told her what he was thinking, what he was feeling, what he was frightened of, and what he dreamed of.

And what he dreamed of was her.

She clenched her teeth and breathed through her nose and looked at him.

She was angry and confused and amazed and excited and frightened all at the same time. She finally knew the truth. At least some of it.

Now she knew that she didn’t just feel different, she was different.

The thought of it terrified her: she was a creature of the night.

She came from the very forest that her pa had taught her to fear all her life and had forbidden her to enter. The thought of coming from that place repulsed her, scared her, but at the same time there was a strange confirmation in it, almost a relief. It made a twisted kind of sense to her.

She looked at her father, sitting with his back against the wall. Now that he had finally told her the story, he seemed exhausted, like a man who had shared a great burden.

He picked himself up off the floor, brushed off his hands and walked slowly to the other side of the room, deep in thought.

‘I’m sorry, Sera,’ he said. ‘I reckon it ain’t gonna do ya no good on the inside knowin’ all that, but you’re right, you’re growin’ up now, and ya deserved to know.’ He came over to her and squatted down and held her so that he could look into her face. ‘But whatever you do with it, I want you to remember this one thing: there’s nothin’ wrong with you, Sera, nothin’ at all, you hear?’

‘Yeah, I hear, Pa,’ she said, nodding and wiping the tears from her eyes. There was turmoil in her heart, but one thing she knew for sure: her father believed in her. But, even as she stood there looking at him, thoughts and questions started weaving through her mind.

Would she have to stay hidden forever? Could she ever fit in with the people of Biltmore? Could she ever make any friends? She was a creature of the night, but what did that mean she could do? She looked down at her hand. If she grew out her fingernails, would they become claws?

In the distance she could hear the sound of the search party moving through the basement, and she tried to block it out. She looked over at her father again. After a long pause, she quietly asked the question that had been forming in her mind.

‘What about my mother?’

Her pa shut his eyes for a second as he took a good, long breath, and then he opened his eyes, looked at her and spoke to her with unusual softness. ‘I’m sorry, Sera. The truth is I don’t rightly know. But when I see her in my mind I think she must have been beautiful, both lovely and strong. She fought hard to bring you into the world, Sera, and she wanted to stay with you, but she knew she couldn’t. I don’t know why she couldn’t. But she gave you to me to love and take care of, and for that I’m much obliged.’

‘So maybe she’s still out there someplace . . .’ Her voice trembled, uncertain. Her pa’s story had made it feel like there was a tornado twisting inside her, but the thought of her momma felt like the bursting of the sun.

‘Maybe she is,’ he relented, gently.

She looked at him. ‘Pa, do you . . . do you think that . . . do you know if she was human or –’

‘I don’t want to hear any talk ’bout that,’ he interrupted her, shaking his head. She could see in the tightness of his mouth how upset her question made him. ‘You’re my little girl,’ he said. ‘That’s what I believe.’

‘But in the forest –’ she began.

‘No,’ he cut her off, ‘I don’t want you to think about that. You live here. With me. This is your home. I’ve told ya before, and I’ll tell ya again, Sera: our world is filled with many mysteries, things we don’t understand. Never go into the deep parts of the forest, for there are many dangers there, both dark and bright, and they will ensnare your soul.’

She stared at her pa for a long time, trying to comprehend his words. She could see the seriousness in his eyes, and she felt it too, deep down in her heart. Her pa was the only person she’d ever had in the world.

She heard men coming down the corridor outside the door. They were searching the rooms of the sub-basement. The hair on her arms tingled, telling her to run.

She looked at her pa. After all he’d done for her by telling her this story, she didn’t want to bring it up again, didn’t want to make him angry, but she had to ask one last question.

‘What about the man who took the girl in the yellow dress? What kind of demon is he, Pa? Does he come out of the forest, or do you think he’s one of the fancy-dressed swells from upstairs?’

‘I don’t know,’ he said. ‘I’ve been prayin’ to God in heaven that it was a figment of your imagination.’

‘It wasn’t, Pa,’ she said softly.

He didn’t want to argue with her any more, but he looked straight at her. ‘Don’t get it in your head you’re gonna go out there, Sera,’ he said. ‘It’s just too dangerous for us. You see why now. I know you’re hankering to help her, and that does ya credit, but don’t worry about the girl. She’s their kin, not ours. They don’t need our help. They’ll find her. You stay out of it.’

At that moment, someone pounded on the heavy wooden door to the electrical room.

‘We’re searching the house!’ a man shouted.

Serafina glanced around even though she already knew there was no way out of the room.

‘Open this door!’ shouted another man. ‘Open up!’