Читать книгу One Night Before Christmas - Джанис Мейнард, Robyn Grady - Страница 18

Eleven

It was the perfect day for an excursion. Since men were still working at the cabin removing the last of the tree debris and getting ready to cover the whole structure with a heavy tarp, Phoebe turned in the opposite direction, walking side by side with Leo back down the road to a small lane which turned off to the left and meandered into the forest.

She had fastened Teddy into a sturdy canvas carrier with straps that crisscrossed at her back. Walking was her favorite form of exercise, but it took a quarter mile to get used to the extra weight on her chest. She kept her hand under Teddy’s bottom. His body was comfortable and warm nestled against her.

Leo carried the large ax like it weighed nothing at all, when Phoebe knew for a fact that the wooden-handled implement was plenty heavy. He seemed pleased to be out of the house, whistling an off-key tune as they strode in amicable silence.

The spot where she hoped to find the perfect Christmas tree was actually an old home site, though only remnants of the foundation and the chimney remained. Small weather-roughened headstones nearby marked a modest family cemetery. Some of the writing on the stones was still legible, including several that read simply, Beloved Baby. It pained her to think of the tragic deaths from disease in those days.

But she had suffered more than her share of hurt. She liked to think she understood a bit of what those families had faced.

Leo frowned, seeing the poignant evidence of human lives loved and lost. “Does this belong to you?” The wind soughed in the trees, seeming to echo chattering voices and happy laughter of an earlier day.

“As much as you can own a graveyard, I guess. It’s on my property. But if anyone ever showed up to claim this place, I would give them access, of course. If descendants exist, they probably don’t even know this is here.”

One of the infant markers caught his attention. “I can’t imagine losing a child,” he said, his expression grim. “I see how much Luc and Hattie love their two, and even though I’m not a parent, sometimes it terrifies me to think of all the things that happen in the world today.”

“Will you ever want children of your own?” Her breath caught in her throat as she realized that his answer was very important to her.

He squatted and brushed leaves away from the base of the small lichen-covered stone. “I doubt it. I don’t have the time, and frankly, it scares the hell out of me.” Looking up at her, his smile was wry. But despite the humor, she realized he was telling the absolute truth.

Her stomach tightened in disappointment. “You’re still young.”

“The business is my baby. I’m content to let Luc carry on the family lineage.”

Since she had no answer to that, the subject lapsed, but she knew she had been given fair warning. Not from any intentional ultimatum on Leo’s part. The problem was, Phoebe had allowed her imagination to begin weaving fantasies. Along the way, her heart, once broken but well on the way to recovery, had decided to participate.

The result was an intense and sadly dead-end infatuation with Leo Cavallo.

She stroked Teddy’s hair, smiling to see the interest he demonstrated in his surroundings. He was a happy, inquisitive baby. Since the day he was born, she had loved him terribly. But this time alone, just the two of them, and now with Leo, had cemented his place in her heart. Having to return him to his parents was going to be a dreadful wrench. The prospect was so dismal, she forced the thought away. Much more of this, and she was going to start quoting an infamous Southern belle. I’ll think about that tomorrow.

Leo stood and stretched, rolling his shoulders, the ax on the ground propped against his hip. “I’m ready. Show me which one.”

“Don’t be silly. We have to make a careful decision.”

“This is the world’s biggest Christmas tree farm. I’d say you won’t have too much trouble. How about that one right there?” He pointed at a fluffy cedar about five feet tall.

“Too small and the wrong variety. I’ll know when I see it.”

Leo took her arm and steered her toward a grouping of evergreens. “Anything here grab your fancy?”

She and Leo were both encased in layers of winter clothes. But she fancied she could feel the warmth of his fingers on her skin. A hundred years ago, Leo would have worked from dawn to dusk, providing for his family. At night, when the children were asleep in the loft, she could see him making love to his wife on a feather tick mattress in front of the fire. Entering her, Phoebe, with a fire, a passion he had kept banked during the daylight hours. Saving those special moments of intimacy for the dark of night.

Wishing she could peel out of her coat, she stripped off her gloves and removed her scarf. The image of a more primitive Leo was so real, her breasts ached for his touch. She realized she had worn too many clothes. The day was warm for a winter afternoon. And thoughts of Leo’s expertise in bed made her feel as if she had a fever.

She cleared her throat, hoping he wouldn’t notice the hot color that heated her neck and cheeks. “Give me a second.” Pretending an intense interest in the grouping of trees, she breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of the fresh foliage. “This one,” she said hoarsely, grabbing blindly at the branches of a large Fraser fir.

At her back, Leo stood warm and tall. “I want you to have your perfect Christmas, Phoebe. But as the voice of reason I have to point out that your choice is a little on the big side.” He put his hands on her shoulders, kissing her just below the ear. “If it’s what you want, though, I’ll trim it or something.”

She nodded, her legs shaky. “Thank you.”

He set her aside gently, and picked up the ax. “Move farther back. I don’t know how far the wood chips will fly.”

Teddy had dozed off, his chubby cheeks a healthy pink. She kept her arms around him as Leo notched the bottom of the tree trunk and took a few practice chops. At the last minute, he shed his heavy parka, now clad above the waist in only a thermal weave shirt, green to match his surroundings.

It was ridiculous to get so turned on by a Neanderthal exhibition of strength. But when Leo took his first powerful swing and the ax cut deeply into the tree, Phoebe felt a little faint.

* * *

Leo was determined to make Phoebe happy. The trunk of this particular fir was never going to fit into a normal-size tree stand. He’d have to cobble something together with a large bucket and some gravel. Who knew? At the moment, his first task was to fell the sucker and drag it home.

At his fifth swing, he felt a twinge in his chest. The feeling was so unexpected and so sharp, he hesitated half a second, long enough for the ax to lose its trajectory and land out of target range. Now, one of the lower branches was about two feet shorter than it had been.

Phoebe, standing a good ten feet away, called out to him. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he said, wiping his brow with the back of his hand. Tree chopping was damned hard work. Knowing that her eyes were on him, he found his stride again, landing four perfect strikes at exactly the same spot. The pain in his chest had already disappeared. Probably just a muscle. His doctor had reassured him more than once that Leo’s health was perfect. Trouble was, when a man had been felled by something he couldn’t see, it made him jumpy.

Before severing the trunk completely, he paused before the last swing and tugged the tree to one side. The fragrance of the branches was alluring. Crisp. Piquant. Containing memories of childhood days long forgotten. Something about scent leaped barriers of time and place.

Standing here in the forest with sap on his hands and his muscles straining from exertion, he felt a wave of nostalgia. He turned to Phoebe. “I’m glad you wanted to do this. I remember Christmases when I begged for a real tree. But my dad was allergic. Our artificial trees were always beautiful—Mom had a knack for that—but just now, a whiff of the air brought it all back. It’s the smell of the holidays.”

“I’m glad you approve,” she said with a charming grin. Standing as she was in a splash of sunlight, her hair glistened with the sheen of a raven’s wing. The baby slept against her breast. Leo wondered what it said about his own life that he envied a little kid. Phoebe’s hand cradled Teddy’s head almost unconsciously. Every move she made to care for her sister’s child spoke eloquently of the love she had for her nephew.

Phoebe should have kids of her own. And a husband. The thought hit him like a revelation, and he didn’t know why it was startling. Most women Phoebe’s age were looking to settle down and start families. But maybe she wasn’t. Because, clearly, she had hidden herself away like the unfortunate heroine in Rapunzel’s castle. Only in Phoebe’s case, the incarceration was voluntary.

Why would a smart, attractive woman isolate herself in an out-of-the-way cabin where her nearest neighbors were knocking on heaven’s door? When was the last time she’d had a date? Nothing about Phoebe’s life made sense, especially since she had admitted to working once upon a time in a highly competitive career.

A few thin clouds had begun to roll in, dropping the temperature, so he chopped one last time and had the satisfaction of hearing the snap that freed their prize. Phoebe clapped softly. “Bravo, Paul Bunyan.”

He donned his coat and lifted an eyebrow. “Are you making fun of me?”

She joined him beside the tree and reached up awkwardly to kiss his cheek, the baby tucked between them. “Not even a little. You’re my hero. I couldn’t have done this on my own.”

“Happy to oblige.” Her gratitude warmed him. But her next words gave him pause.

“If we eat dinner early, we can probably get the whole thing decorated before bedtime.”

“Whoa. Back up the truck. I thought we had plans for bedtime.” He curled a hand behind her neck and stopped her in her tracks by the simple expedient of kissing her long and slow. Working around the kid was a challenge, but he was motivated.

Phoebe’s lashes fluttered downward as she leaned into him. “We do,” she whispered. The fact that she returned his kiss was noteworthy, but even more gratifying was her enthusiasm. She went up on tiptoes, aligned their lips perfectly and kissed him until he shuddered and groaned. “Good Lord, Phoebe.”

She smoothed a strand of hair behind his ear, her fingers warm against his chilled skin. “Are you complaining, Mr. Cavallo?”

“No,” he croaked.

“Then let’s get crackin’.”

Even though Phoebe carried a baby, and had been for some time, Leo was equally challenged by the difficulty of dragging the enormous tree, trunk first, back to the house. He walked at the edge of the road in the tall, dead grass, not wanting to shred the branches on gravel. By the time they reached their destination, he was breathing hard. “I think this thing weighs a hundred pounds.”

Phoebe looked over her shoulder, her smile wickedly teasing. “I’ve seen your biceps, Leo. I’m sure you can bench-press a single measly tree.” She unlocked the front door and propped it open. “I’ve already cleared a spot by the fireplace. Let me know if you need a hand.”

* * *

Phoebe couldn’t remember the last time she’d had so much fun. Leo was a good sport. Chopping down the large tree she had selected was not an easy task, but he hadn’t complained. If anything, he seemed to get a measure of satisfaction from conquering O Tannenbaum.

Phoebe unashamedly used Teddy as a shield for the rest of the day. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to be alone with Leo. But there was something jarring about feeling such wanton, breathless excitement for a man when she was, at the same time, cuddling a little baby.

It would probably be different if the child were one they shared. Then, over Teddy’s small, adorable head, she and Leo could exchanges smiles and loving glances as they remembered the night they created this precious bundle of joy. With no such scenario in existence, Phoebe decided her feelings were fractured...much like the time she’d had a high school babysitting job interrupted by the arrival of her boyfriend. That long-ago night as a sixteen-year-old, it had been all she could do to concentrate on her charges.

Almost a decade and a half later, with Leo prowling the interior of the cabin, all grumpy and masculine and gorgeous, she felt much the same way. Nevertheless, she focused on entertaining her nephew.

Fortunately, the baby was in an extremely good mood. He played in his high chair while Phoebe threw dinner together. Thanks to the largesse of Leo’s buddy—which Leo no doubt cofunded—it was no trouble to pick and choose. Chicken Alfredo. Spinach salad. Fruit crepes for dessert. It would be easy to get spoiled by having haute cuisine at her fingertips with minimal effort. She would have to resist, though. Because, like Leo’s presence in her life, the four-star meals were temporary.

Leo, after much cursing and struggling, and with a dollop of luck, finally pronounced himself satisfied with the security of their Christmas pièce de résistance. After changing the baby’s diaper, Phoebe served up two plates and set them on the table. “Hurry, then. Before it gets cold.”

Leo sat down with a groan. “Wouldn’t matter to me. I’m starving.”

She ended up sitting Teddy in his high chair and feeding him his bottle with one hand while she ate with the other. At the end of the meal, she scooped Teddy up and held him out to Leo. “If you wouldn’t mind playing with him on the sofa for a little while, I’ll clean up the kitchen, and we can start on the tree.”

A look of discomfort crossed Leo’s face. “I’m more of an observer when it comes to babies. I don’t think they like me.”

“Don’t be silly, Leo. And besides, you did offer to help with Teddy when I let you stay. Remember?”

He picked up his coat. “Buford says it’s going to snow tonight. I need to move half of that pile of wood you have out by the shed and stack it on the front porch. If it’s a heavy snow, we might lose power.” Before Phoebe could protest, he bundled up in his winter gear and was gone.

Phoebe felt the joy leach out of the room. She wanted Leo to love Teddy like she did, but that was silly. Leo had his own family, a brother, a sister-in-law, a niece, a nephew and a grandfather. Besides, he’d been pretty clear about not wanting kids. Some people didn’t get all warm and fuzzy when it came to infants.

Still, she felt a leaden sense of disappointment. Leo was a wonderful man. Being squeamish about babies was hardly a character flaw.

She put Teddy back in the high chair. “Sorry, kiddo. Looks like it’s you and me on KP duty tonight. I’ll be as quick as I can, and then I’ll read you a book. How about that?”

Teddy found the loose end of the safety strap and chewed it. His little chortling sounds and syllables were cute, but hardly helpful when it came to the question of Leo.

Tonight was a big bridge for Phoebe to cross. She was ready. She wanted Leo, no question. But she couldn’t help feeling anxiety about the future. In coming to the mountains, she had learned to be alone. Would agreeing to be Leo’s lover negate all the progress she had made? And would ultimately losing him—as she surely would—put her back in that dark place again?

Even with all her questions, tonight’s outcome was a forgone conclusion. Leo was her Christmas present to herself.