Читать книгу Say it with Diamonds...this Christmas - Сандра Мартон, Miranda Lee - Страница 18

‘I KNEW Chloe had just about reached her use-by date,’ Flora remarked as she packed the dishwasher for the last time that evening. ‘But I still can’t believe Nick broke up with her on Christmas Day.’

Sarah glanced up from where she was sitting, having a cup of coffee. The clock on the wall showed twenty-two minutes past eight.

‘He’s a right devil with women,’ Flora rattled on, ‘but I’ve never thought of him as cruel.’

Strangely enough, Sarah agreed with Flora.

‘He really had no option after Chloe accused him of carrying on with me in front of everyone,’ she defended.

Flora pulled a face. ‘I suppose not. I just wish I’d been there. Trust something exciting to happen the first year Jim and I decide to eat Christmas dinner back in our rooms. So tell me, what led up to it?’

Sarah shrugged. ‘I have no idea. One minute everything seemed fine, the next she just came out with it. We were both shocked, I can tell you.’

‘I’ll bet it was because of the way you look today. She was probably blind with jealousy.’

‘That’s what Nick said.’

‘He’d have been furious with her for saying something like that in front of his work colleagues. But I heard you set her to rights.’

‘Really? Who told you that?’ She’d done her best not to provide Flora with too many details, in case she slipped up with her story.

‘One of the waiters. He said it was the most interesting Christmas lunch they’d ever catered for.’

‘It was darned embarrassing. I’m glad it’s over. Next year, things are going to be very different.’

Sarah wished she hadn’t said that. Because she didn’t want to think about next year. She didn’t want to think about anything but tonight.

But once the thought was put in her head, it was impossible to banish it. If Nick had been telling the truth earlier, then by next Christmas she would be long gone from his life, and from his bed.

‘You won’t change your mind?’ Flora asked.

‘About what?’

‘About letting me cook a hot meal next year. Call me old-fashioned, but Christmas just doesn’t feel like Christmas without a turkey and a plum pudding. I know Nick won’t mind. He really likes turkey.’

‘Nick probably won’t be here,’ Sarah said a bit stiffly.

‘What? Why not?’

‘He’s moving out in February.’

‘So what? You’ll invite him here for Christmas, surely. You and he are like family.’

‘He might not want to come.’

‘Rubbish! He loves having Christmas here. Even when he was building that resort on Happy Island, he always came back for Christmas. And it’s not as though he’ll go off and get married and make a home of his own.’

‘True,’ Sarah agreed ruefully, her eyes dropping to her coffee. ‘That’s never going to happen.’

So don’t start secretly hoping that it will. He’s not going to fall in love with you, no matter how much you love him. You’re just another sexual partner, a temporary object of desire, a source of physical pleasure.

And when that pleasure begins to wane, when boredom sets in, you’ll be replaced. That’s the way it’s always been with Nick and that’s the way it will continue.

It might have been a seriously depressing train of thought if she’d been in a sensible, looking-after-her-future-happiness mood. But Sarah was anything but sensible at that moment. Excitement was fizzing through her veins, her insides wound so tight she was having trouble swallowing her coffee. How she managed to appear so composed in front of Flora, she had no idea. Obviously, she had the makings of an Oscar-winning actress!

‘Where is Nick, by the way?’ Flora asked.

‘He went upstairs a little while ago,’ Sarah replied as cool as you please. ‘He said he was tired.’

‘You finished with that?’ Flora reached out for her coffee-mug.

Sarah handed it to her. ‘I think I’ll go up to bed, too,’ she said, this time with a slight catch in her voice. ‘It’s been a long day.’

‘There’s a good movie on at eight-thirty,’ Flora said. ‘Got that film-star fellow in it that I like. Sexy devil. Now, he can put his slippers under my bed any time he likes.’

‘Mmm,’ Sarah murmured as she slid from the stool. Not as sexy as the devil she was about to spend the night with. ‘Goodnight, Flora. Don’t worry about breakfast. I’m going to sleep in. You should too. You look tired.’

‘I am a bit. What about Nick?’

‘I’ll tell him to get himself something in the morning. I doubt he’s asleep yet.’

‘Before you go, Sarah, I just want to say how lovely you looked today. I wouldn’t mind betting that by next Christmas you’ll have a real boyfriend sitting at the Christmas table. Or even a fiancé. Which reminds me, did anything further develop with Derek today?’

‘Er—no. He’s not interested in me in that way.’

‘What a pity. Still, there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Off you go, then.’

‘Goodnight, Flora. Enjoy the movie.’

‘Oh, I will.’

Sarah’s pretend composure began to disintegrate the moment she left the kitchen.

‘What on earth do you think you’re doing?’ she muttered to herself as she walked up the stairs on suddenly shaky legs. ‘He’s going to break your heart. You know that, don’t you?’

Sarah stopped in front of his bedroom door. She even lifted her hand to knock. What she was going to say to him, she had no idea, though go to hell came to mind.

But then she heard the sound of Nick’s shower running.

He was getting ready for her.

She could picture him standing naked under the jets of warm water, washing himself clean with long, soapy strokes of a sponge. In her mind’s eye, he was already wanting her.

It was the thought of his wanting her that was the most corrupting. She’d wanted him to want her like this for years.

Impossible to turn her back on his desire.

Impossible to ignore her own.

Sarah’s hand fell back to her side and she stumbled on to her bedroom.

Nick stood under the lukewarm spray, his hands braced against the shower-stall tiles, his eyes down.

Half an hour to go and already he was in agony.

Gritting his teeth, he turned the water to cold. Ten minutes later, he had his flesh under control again. But not his mind.

You should not be doing this, Nick, came the reproachful thought. She’s in love with you. Or she thinks she is.

‘You’re a total bastard,’ he growled to himself.

His mouth twisted into a sneer as he emerged from the shower stall and snatched up a towel. ‘So what’s new, Nick?’

Still, he had given her every chance to escape. She’d been right when she’d accused him of trying to frighten her off. He’d honestly thought when he pushed her to her knees the way he had that she would jump up and run a mile. But she hadn’t …

Of course, his desire for Sarah had been building in his head for years. It was no wonder he’d found it difficult to control himself this afternoon.

Still, it was a worry, his lack of control. From the moment she’d taken him into her mouth, he’d just lost it. Totally.

As he stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, Nick vowed that tonight would be different. Tonight he would be the coolly confident lover he usually was, patiently taking her on an erotic journey that initially might feel romantic to a girl as young and naïve as she was.

By morning, however, she would see him for what he really was: a cold-blooded and ruthless bastard who used women for nothing but his own pleasure and satisfaction. She would see that any finer feelings would be wasted on him, at the same time becoming a lot wiser to the wicked ways of the world, and of men.

It was a perverse way to protect her, but then, he’d always been perverse when it came to Sarah. Hadn’t he lusted after her when she’d been little more than a girl? A lust which had been as obsessive as it was unwanted.

This moment had been inevitable, Nick conceded as he finished drying himself. The only surprise was that he’d held back as long as he had.

Nine o’clock saw Sarah once again at Nick’s door, her hands curling into white-knuckled balls as she struggled to find the courage to knock.

The black teddy fitted her perfectly, the skin-tight mid-section outlining her newly defined waist, the built-in lace bra cut low. More transparent lace inserts covered her hips, making the already high-cut sides seem even higher. But it was the back of the teddy that shocked her, mostly because there wasn’t much of it. A couple of inches of material above her waist and next to nothing below, where it narrowed into a satin thong.

The door suddenly being wrenched open brought a gasp to her lips. Nick stood there, a dark red towel slung low around his hips, the expression on his face not a particularly happy one.

But his eyes changed as they swept over her, that white-hot desire she’d always wanted to see making her stomach flip right over.

‘I knew you’d look beautiful in that. I didn’t realise just how beautiful. And how damned sexy.’

He looked pretty damned sexy himself, she thought breathlessly.

His sudden frown worried her, as did his ragged sigh. ‘You’ve made my life really difficult, Sarah.’

‘No more than you’ve made mine,’ she countered. Quite bravely, considering she was quaking inside.

He shook his head as he took her right hand in his and pulled her into the bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them.

‘I presume you haven’t changed your mind,’ he said drily as he drew her across the room towards the bed.

‘If I had, I wouldn’t be wearing this, would I?’ she threw at him with more feigned boldness whilst her gaze flicked nervously around.

She noted the bed, its red quilt thrown back, the black satin sheets glowing under the soft light of the red lampshades.

His suddenly scooping her up into his arms shattered her brave façade.

‘You’re trembling,’ he said.

‘Am I?’

‘Very definitely.’ He sighed for the second time, his eyes shutting for a moment. ‘What am I going to do with you?’

‘Make love to me, I hope. All night long, you promised.’

His eyes flicked open to glower down at her.

‘No, Sarah. That’s not what’s going to happen here.’

Her heart plummeted to the floor.

‘What I’m going to do is have sex with you. Don’t mistake it for lovemaking. I never make love. I have sex with women. Of course,’ he added with a sardonic smile as he lowered her gently into the middle of the bed, ‘it will be great sex.’

Relief—and a rush of excitement—flooded through Sarah as her head and shoulders came to rest against the pile of satin-covered pillows. At this moment, he could call it whatever he liked. Nothing he could say would deter her from seeing this through.

But for Sarah, it would be lovemaking. For her, this was going to be the night of her life!

The satin sheets felt cool against her heated skin. Nick’s eyes were cool as well, that white-hot desire she’d spotted earlier now not in evidence.

‘Relax,’ he advised as he straightened.

‘I … I guess I am a bit nervous,’ she admitted when he joined her on the bed.

‘Yes, I can see that.’

Propping himself up on his side, he ran a teasing fingertip around the edge of the low-cut neckline, making her skin break out into goose-pimples. When he traced the neckline a second time, almost touching one of her nipples, she sucked in, then held her breath.

‘Do you have extra-sensitive breasts?’

His question rattled her. Actually his talking rattled her. None of her previous lovers had talked. They’d simply got on with it.

Sarah finally let go of her long-held breath. ‘I … I don’t know,’ she said, her head spinning.

‘Let’s see, shall we?’

Sarah held her breath again as he levered the satin straps off her shoulders and peeled them slowly downwards till the lace cups gave up their prizes.

‘Mmm. Delicious,’ he said, and bent to lick her right nipple.

Sarah clenched her teeth hard in her jaw, lest she cry out. But oh, the dizzying pleasure of it.

When he drew her nipple into his mouth, she could not prevent a moan escaping.

When he nibbled at it with his teeth, she squirmed and whimpered.

His head lifted, his eyes glittering now.

‘As much as this teddy looks fantastic on you, right at this moment I prefer you without it.’

Sarah gulped but said nothing as he peeled it down her body and off her feet before tossing it carelessly aside. His eyes were like laser beams, honing in on that private part of her body.

‘I love looking at you,’ he rasped, caressing her smooth pubic bone before sliding his fingers through the already damp folds of her sex.

‘Oh,’ Sarah choked out, stunned by the sensations that came crashing through her.

‘You are so beautiful,’ he crooned as he continued to explore her down there, touching her everywhere. Inside, outside, then inside again. More deeply this time, finding erotic zones she didn’t know she had. She pressed herself urgently against his hand, her head twisting from side to side, her wide eyes pleading with his as her body raced towards a climax.

‘It’s OK,’ he said, his voice rough, his eyelids heavy. ‘I want to watch you come.’

Sexy words, sexy eyes. Pushing her over the edge in a free-fall of pleasure that was wonderfully wanton, till she came to earth with a thud and realised this was not what she’d waited a lifetime to experience: Nick watching her come.

But no sooner did these rather dismaying thoughts flash through her mind than he was kissing her, not wildly but gently, his mouth sipping softly at hers.

‘Don’t be upset,’ he murmured between kisses. ‘You needed that. You were wound too tight. Next time … I’ll be inside you … and it’ll be much better.’

She blinked up at him when his head rose.

The corner of his mouth lifted in a quirky smile. ‘You don’t believe me?’

‘Oh, no,’ she said truthfully, ‘I believe you.’

‘Then what is it?’

‘I … I’m sorry, but I thought … before we go any further, what … what about protection? I mean … Oh, you know what I mean,’ she said, annoyed with herself for stuttering and stammering. ‘You’ve been around.’

His expression carried an element of reproach. ‘Sarah, you don’t honestly think I would risk making you pregnant, do you?’

‘Well, actually, you can’t,’ she admitted. ‘Make me pregnant, I mean. I’m on the Pill.’

‘I see. But you still want me to use condoms?’

‘I’m not a total fool, Nick.’ Even if he thought she was for being here with him.

‘You’ve no need to worry. I’ve got that taken care of. Relax. No way are you getting out of here, sweetheart. Not till your old Uncle Nick lets you.’

‘Don’t call yourself that!’ she snapped as she struggled to suppress an involuntary moan. Dear heaven, but he was good at that. ‘There’s nothing wrong with our being together,’ she threw at him in desperation.

‘That depends on your definition of wrong,’ he countered, his devastatingly knowing fingers not missing a beat as he touched her breasts again. ‘But no matter. It’s like I said this afternoon,’ he went on, that knowing hand sliding slowly down over her stomach and back between her legs. ‘I’d reached the point of no return.’

‘I … I think I’m just about reaching it again, too,’ she choked out.

‘So soon?’

She squirmed against his hand, her still sensitised flesh unable to bear too much more.

‘You have to stop that,’ she cried.

He stopped, leaving her panting whilst he rolled away and yanked open the top drawer of his bedside table. He selected a condom and drew it on. When he returned to her body, he did not rush. Neither did he attempt any kind of weird or wonderful position, for which she was grateful. Sarah wanted to look into his face when he was inside her; wanted to hold him and love him as she’d always wanted to.

She tried not to cry out when he finally entered her. But she couldn’t quite manage to contain herself, a raw sound escaping her throat. Do not fall apart, for pity’s sake, she lectured herself. But there was a great lump in her throat and tears were threatening.

Nick’s concern was instantaneous. ‘Are you all right?’ he asked, smoothing her hair back from her face and staring deep into her by then glistening eyes. ‘I’m not hurting you, am I?’

What an ironic thing to say!

‘No, no, I’m fine,’ she insisted, though her voice sounded artificially high. ‘Would you mind kissing me, please? I like to be kissed a lot.’ Anything to stop him staring down at her in that thoughtful fashion.

‘My pleasure,’ he said, and lowered his mouth to hers.

It was a kiss that might have been the kiss of true love, if she hadn’t known differently.

How hungry it was, how passionate … how heartbreaking.

When his body began to move in tandem with his tongue, her fragile emotions were forgotten as the physical experience took over. With each surge of his flesh she could feel the coil of desire tighten within her. It was exciting, yet frustrating at the same time. She wanted to come. But as the seconds turned into minutes there was no release for her, only an all-consuming heat that flooded her body and quickened her heartbeat to a point where her mouth was forced to burst away from his.

‘Help me, Nick,’ she sobbed as she dragged in some life-saving breaths.

‘Look at me,’ he commanded, cupping her face and stilling his flesh inside her.

She stared up at him, her eyes wide and wild, her mouth panting heavily.

‘Wrap your legs higher around my back,’ he advised. ‘Then move with me. Lift your hips as I push forward, then lower them when I withdraw. There’s no hurry, Sarah. Just look into my eyes and trust me.’

Just look into my eyes …

She never wanted to look anywhere else.

Trust me …

Oh, God. How she wanted to do that too.

This is all a big mistake, Nick thought as she blindly followed his instructions. How long had it been since he’d been so damned nice and considerate in bed?

Who was this Nick who was suddenly caring so much?

He didn’t approve of him. Couldn’t trust him. He might start thinking he’d changed.

Which was impossible. He was what he was and he’d never change. This was just a momentary aberration. He’d get over it.

The trouble was he didn’t think he’d get over it in one night.

He began moving faster, and so did she, her eyes growing wider and more desperate-looking.

Her first spasm was so strong Nick almost came then and there, but he held on, watching with wonder as her face became suffused with a seductive mixture of surprise and sheer joy. He’d never seen a woman look like that before. Never felt a woman who felt the way she did, either.

Finally he surrendered his control, astonished at the intensity of his own climax, and the strange lurch to his heart when she pulled him down on top of her.

‘Oh, Nick,’ she cried, and nuzzled into his neck. ‘Oh, my darling …’

Nick didn’t say a word. He couldn’t.

He’d never felt so confused. All he was sure of was that he’d never felt what he’d felt just now when she’d called him her darling. The endearment had wrenched at his very soul, that soul which he’d always imagined was too dark for such sentiment.

As he lay there with her cuddled up to him, Nick gradually became sure of something else: he didn’t want to frighten Sarah off any more.

Which rather changed his plans for the rest of the night.

Nick didn’t delude himself that this more romantic side he’d unexpectedly discovered within himself would last. But, for now, he found it quite irresistible. He could not wait to make love to Sarah again, could not wait to see the delight in her eyes.

But first, there was something he had to do. Carefully he disentangled himself from her arms and headed for the bathroom, where he washed himself fresh and clean then returned to the bed. He was about to stir her with some kisses when the phone next to his bed began to ring.