Читать книгу Home for the Holidays - Sarah Mayberry - Страница 10

HANNAH DIDN’T STOP WALKING until she was safely in the garage, breathing in the smell of damp concrete and engine grease. She sank onto her upright tool chest, pressing her hands to her face. For a moment she was so angry and sad she could barely breathe.

I’m so sick of this. I’m so sick of feeling this way.

The problem was, she didn’t know what to do with her anger. She’d thought that not seeing Kelly or Lucas for all these months would have made a difference, taken some of the heat out of her feelings. But she’d only had to look into her sister’s perfectly made-up face to feel it all surging back. That, and seeing the pity in her mother’s eyes …

Of course, her mother wasn’t the only one who felt sorry for poor, jilted Hannah. It had practically become a national pastime once the wedding had been canceled. Their family, all of her and Lucas’s friends, the neighbors, her customers—they’d all offered their condolences and shaken their heads. After all, it wasn’t every day that a tomboyish older sister was cast aside for her younger, more glamorous, more beautiful sister. It was a classic tale of woe and everyone could relate. And more than anything—perhaps even more than the pain of betrayal and loss—Hannah resented being cast as a victim. It wasn’t until her life had crashed around her ears that she’d understood how much pride she took in her independence and her unusual vocation and her own unique, take-no-prisoners view of the world. And now, thanks to Kelly and Lucas, she was simply poor Hannah, victim. Object of pity and sympathy.

And right now she was acting exactly like a victim, wallowing in her own messy emotional soup. No wonder her mother felt sorry for her.

Hannah surged to her feet and crossed to her bike. There was still an hour or so of daylight left and she might as well use it while she attempted to fix the muffler. Seizing the handlebars, she rocked the bike off its stand and pushed it down the driveway. After propping it on its stand again, she went back for her toolbox.

She deliberately focused on what she was doing, on what she needed to do next as she worked, and slowly she calmed. Later, she would apologize to her mother. Hannah knew she hadn’t exactly been a dream to live with the past six months, and although she burned every time she thought about her mother listening sympathetically to her sister, she knew it was her mother’s right to do what she thought was best. And Hannah was the first person to admit she was hardly unbiased in this situation.

Her stomach rumbled with hunger but she wasn’t ready to go in yet. Instead, she grabbed a beer from the bar fridge she kept in the garage and palmed a handful of peanuts from the jar on the workbench. She’d downed half the beer when she became aware that someone was watching her.

She glanced across into a pair of big, intent blue eyes.

“What’s wrong with it?” the little girl asked, toes hanging over the edge of the curb as she hovered near the bike.

Hannah had never been very good at guessing kids’ ages, but the girl was small and skinny with a delicate, pointed face and Hannah figured she must be about eight or nine. Her very blond hair was caught up on either side of her head in pigtails, and her top featured lots of sparkles and stars in various colors of pink. When she clasped her hands in front of her tummy, Hannah saw her nails were painted with glitter polish.

“There’s a hole in the muffler. I’m about to patch it,” Hannah said.

“What’s a muffler?” the little girl asked, taking a step closer.

Hannah pointed to the round tube at the head of the exhaust pipe. “It’s this part here, in front of the exhaust pipe.”

“What does it do when it’s not broken?” She took another step.

Hannah could see the girl was aching to touch the shiny red finish on the gas tank and she nodded encouragingly. “It’s okay, you can touch it.”

“It’s so shiny,” the little girl said, glitter-tipped fingernails gliding over the paint.

“The muffler is supposed to stop the engine from sounding so loud,” Hannah said, answering the girl’s earlier question. She tapped the motor. “When the bike is going, there’s a whole lot of noisy stuff going on in here, and the sound has to escape somewhere. The muffler is supposed to turn the volume down.”

“But yours has got a hole in it. Is that why it was so noisy last night?”

Hannah shifted guiltily. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to work out that this was one of Joe Lawson’s kids. She had his blue eyes, for starters. And there was something about the way she held her head … Which meant he’d been right last night—Hannah had woken his kids when she’d been fooling around in the garage.

“I’m sorry about that. I didn’t realize you guys had moved in yet,” Hannah said.

“It’s okay. I didn’t mind.” The little girl thrust her hand forward. “I’m Ruby Lawson, by the way.”

Hannah suppressed a smile. She held up her own hand, displaying the grease on it.

“I’m dirty, sorry. But I’m Hannah,” she said.

“I don’t care about dirt,” Ruby said, and before Hannah could stop her she’d reached out and grasped Hannah’s hand, her small fingers wrapping around Hannah’s larger ones.

“Pleased to meet you,” Ruby said solemnly.

It was impossible for Hannah to hide her smile then. “Pleased to meet you, too, Ruby.”

Ruby smiled back, then looked at the bike. “Can I help you fix it?”

Hannah flicked a glance at Ruby’s sparkly top and purple pants. She didn’t exactly strike Hannah as the tomboy type. Still, Hannah wasn’t about to discourage her—she’d been laughed at and sent on her way too many times when she was a curious kid to hand out the same treatment to another little girl.

“Sure. You can pass me tools when I need them, if you’d like.”

“Okay. You might have to tell me which one is which, though.”

“Deal,” Hannah said.

They worked side by side for a while. Ruby was a fast learner, quickly working out how to tell what size the various spanners and wrenches were by checking the little markings on their sides. She took great delight in slapping each requested tool into Hannah’s hand with vigor. Hannah figured the kid must have seen more than her fair share of medical dramas on TV over the years.

“My dad used to work with tools like this,” Ruby said as they were refitting the patched muffler.

Despite herself, Hannah’s curiosity pricked up its ears. “So your dad is a mechanic, is he?” It couldn’t hurt to know a bit more about the man. He did live next door, after all. Might as well know what she was up against.

“My dad is an oilman. He works on the offshore rigs,” Ruby said proudly. “He’s done every job there is.”

Hannah didn’t know much about oil work, but she was pretty sure that offshore postings meant the person was away a lot. “You must miss him when he’s working, huh?”

She knew she was being nosy, but she couldn’t seem to help herself.

“He’s been working in an office since Mommy died, and now he’s going to be a businessman.”

Hannah froze for a second.

A dead wife. It went a long way to explaining the look in Joe’s eyes.

Suddenly she felt as though she’d invaded her new neighbor’s privacy. She was almost one hundred percent certain that he would hate for her to know about his sad personal life.

“You know what? I think we’re about done,” she said. She stepped back from the bike and Ruby did the same, copying Hannah’s hands-on-hips posture.

“Do we start up the motor now, see if it works?” Ruby asked. Her eyes were wide with excitement when she looked at Hannah.

“Absolutely. You want to do the honors?”

Ruby’s eyes went even wider. “Really?”

Hannah simply handed over the keys. Ruby vibrated with anticipation as she stood on tiptoes and slid the key into the ignition. With an encouraging nod from Hannah, Ruby twisted the key and the bike roared to life. Ruby gave a little squeal and jumped backward. Hannah laughed, then immediately bit her lip when Ruby gave her a reproachful look.

“It just took me by surprise, that’s all,” the little girl said.

“I know. It startles me all the time, too,” Hannah said.

Ruby cocked her head to one side. “Is it fixed? It still sounds very loud.”

She was right; the bike was still too noisy. Ideally, the bike needed a new muffler, but Hannah couldn’t justify the expense when she was still paying off the personal loan she’d had to take out to cover what was left of the mortgage after they’d sold the apartment.

“Well, it’s not perfect, but it’s going to have to do for now,” Hannah said. She reached out and switched the bike off again.

“Can we go for a ride?”

Hannah smiled. She’d been waiting for that one. “I don’t think your dad would appreciate us doing that.”

“He wouldn’t mind.”

“Hmm. I’m not so sure about that.”

Ruby pressed her hands together and gave Hannah a limpid-eyed beseeching look. “Pretty please?”

As pitiful pleas went, it was very effective. Hannah wondered if Ruby had practiced in the mirror. “Sorry, sweetheart. You can have a sit on it, though, if you’d like.”

Ruby considered for a moment. “I guess that would be okay,” she said grudgingly.

Hannah wiped her hands on her jeans and helped boost Ruby onto the saddle. Ruby’s legs barely straddled the seat and she wobbled and clutched at the handlebars, a worried frown on her face.

“Hang on a minute,” Hannah said. She slung a leg over the bike so that she was sitting behind Ruby, holding the little girl’s hips with her hands. “Is that better?”

“Yes. Can I rev the engine?”

“Sure, why not?”

Hannah twisted the ignition key and the bike rumbled to life beneath them. Ruby giggled.

“It’s all bouncy,” she said.

Hannah laughed. She vaguely registered the sound of a door slamming shut in the background as she leaned forward to twist the throttle.

“See? You grip this and twist it slowly forward. But not too much—you don’t want to push it too hard.”

Ruby reached out, fingers spread wide.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Hannah nearly fell off the bike as Joe stalked across the sidewalk, his expression livid.

“Are you out of your freaking mind?” he demanded. He grasped Ruby around the waist, plucking her from the bike as though she weighed less than a feather.

“No, Daddy. Hannah was just going to let me rev the engine,” Ruby protested.

Joe set her on the ground and put a hand on her shoulder. “I want you to go inside.”

“No! We weren’t doing anything wrong. We were just sitting there,” Ruby insisted.

Hannah could see the little girl was getting herself worked up. She could also see that Joe was in no mood to listen to reason. She met Ruby’s gaze.

“It’s okay, sweetie,” she said reassuringly. “You do what your daddy says.”

The small exchange only made Joe angrier. He forcibly turned Ruby around. “Inside, now!” he barked.

Ruby’s bottom lip stuck out and her eyes filled with tears but fear won out over valor. Hannah didn’t blame her—Joe Lawson in full-blooded fury was a pretty damned intimidating sight. With one last glance over her shoulder, Ruby raced toward the house.

Joe waited until his daughter was well out of hearing before turning on Hannah. “What kind of a reckless idiot takes a kid for a ride on a motorbike without a helmet? You want to answer me that?”

“You’re overreacting. If you calmed down for one second—”

“Don’t tell me to be calm, lady.” He shoved a finger in her face. “You had no right to risk my daughter’s life. Did you even stop to think—” He broke off, unable to articulate his fury.

Hannah held his gaze, pride demanding that she not waver for a second in the face of his misplaced righteousness.

“Are you finished?” she asked calmly. “Any more insults you want to throw at me?”

He gave her a scathing head to toe. “Stay away from my daughter.” He turned on his heel and strode toward his house.

Hannah let out the breath she’d been holding.

Wow. That had been exactly what she hadn’t needed—a big, shitty cherry on top of an already shitty day.

She started gathering her tools and was dismayed to see her hands were shaking. She squeezed her hands into fists, willing them to steady. She hadn’t done a single thing wrong. She refused to let him get to her.

When she opened her hands again, the shaking was barely discernible.

Good. That was the way it should be. Back straight, she wheeled her bike into the garage.

JOE PAUSED OUTSIDE Ruby’s bedroom door to take a deep breath and consciously relax his shoulders. His blood was still pounding in his head, but Ruby didn’t deserve his anger. She was just a kid, going with the flow. It wasn’t her fault that Hannah Napier was reckless and irresponsible.

He lifted his hand and rapped on the door.

“Rubes, it’s me,” he called.

She didn’t say anything but he pushed the door open anyway. She was stretched out on her bed, her face buried in her pillow.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you like that,” he said as he crossed to the bed and sat beside her. He laid his hand on her shoulder. He could feel the agitated heat coming off her body. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

Hell, he was the one who’d been frightened. Seeing his little girl perched on the bike like that, realizing what Ruby had been up to while he’d been kneading pizza dough in the kitchen … He’d seen red. If Hannah Napier had been a man, for sure he would have grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and shaken her till her teeth rattled. Luckily for her, she’d been protected by her gender. Just. For a few seconds there, it had been a close-run thing.

“What happened wasn’t your fault, okay?” he said. He stroked Ruby’s rigid back. “But I need you to promise that you will never, ever go for a ride on a motorbike again without talking to me, okay?”

Ruby lifted her head and he could see she’d been crying. “No!”

He frowned. “I know they look like a lot of fun, but they’re dangerous, sweetheart. There’s a whole bunch of special equipment you should be wearing before you even think of riding one of those things.”

His voice caught as he imagined what could have happened to her if something had gone wrong. Ruby was so small, so bloody fragile ….

“No, Daddy, you’ve got it all wrong. Hannah didn’t take me for a ride and now you yelled at her and she’ll never let me help her again.”

Joe frowned. “Ruby, I saw you on the bike. I know you’re only trying to protect your new friend—”

“She didn’t take me for a ride! I asked her to but she said no. Then she said I could sit on the bike if I wanted to and she was really nice and lifted me up and held me when I thought I was going to fall,” Ruby said in an urgent rush.

Joe stared at his daughter. Ruby held his gaze unflinchingly, her blue eyes drenched with tears. The tight, uncomfortable feeling in his gut told him his daughter was speaking the truth.

Damn.

He closed his eyes for a long moment as he reviewed his reaction through the filter of this new information. Over-the-top? Just a little.

“Hannah’s going to hate me now,” Ruby said miserably.

Not half as much as she hates me.

“I’m sure she doesn’t hate you, Rubes. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who made the mistake.”

“I tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen. I asked and asked Hannah to take me for a ride, but she said you wouldn’t like it. I even said you wouldn’t mind, but she said she thought you would.”

Just in case he didn’t feel enough of a heel already.

“Yeah. The thing was, Rube, I saw you sitting up there, and the bike was running, and it looked like you guys had come back from a spin around the block.”

Dear God, could he sound any more defensive?

Ruby gave him a level look. “You should have listened when I tried to explain.”

“You’re right. I should have. And next time, I promise I will.”

Ruby sniffed loudly, then knuckled her eyes dry. “It’s okay. I forgive you,” she said magnanimously.

“Thank you.”

“But we should go next door right now and apologize to Hannah,” Ruby said. She was already wriggling toward the edge of the bed and she looked at Joe expectantly.

He nodded. “That’s a good idea.”

Even though it was going to make him squirm.

“Oh, I know what we should do!” Ruby grabbed the front of his sweater she was so excited. “We should invite Hannah over for pizza! She won’t be able to stay angry with us if we make her pizza.”

Want to bet?

“It’s a lovely idea, Rubes, but I think we might leave the pizza for another night. Hannah probably doesn’t want to have dinner with us just now.”

“Then we should take her one for her to eat on her own. I’ll make it for her and we’ll take it over together and explain how you got it wrong and how you’re sorry for yelling at her.”

For a moment Joe was tempted to agree to the idea, but he knew that taking Ruby with him was the coward’s way out of the hole he’d dug for himself. There was no way Hannah would give him the verbal smackdown he deserved with his daughter standing beside him.

“I tell you what. Why don’t you make a pizza for Hannah, and I’ll take it over to her on my own and apologize?” he said.

Ruby studied him. “Don’t be embarrassed because you made a mistake, Daddy. You only got upset because you love me. I know that.”

Joe smiled. Maybe he should take his daughter with him, after all. There wasn’t a jury in the land that would convict him with her on his side.

He tugged on one of her pigtails. “How did you get to be so wise?”

Ruby smiled and shrugged. “Just lucky, I guess.”

They went to the kitchen to create a pizza especially for Hannah. Ruby insisted on putting every single topping available on it, since they didn’t know what Hannah liked or didn’t like.

“This way, she can pick off the bits she doesn’t want,” Ruby reasoned. “But if the bits aren’t there in the first place, she can’t put them back on.”

Ben had a bit to say about his sister’s logic, but finally Joe had a pizza in his hand and a speech roughed out in his mind.

He’d apologize straight up, not offer any excuses. And when she let fly at him, he’d take it. The way she’d taken it when he dished it out to her.

He felt like a kid going to the principal’s office as he walked up the front steps to Hannah’s house. Gritting his teeth, he rang the doorbell.

There was a rattle of a door chain being removed, then Mrs. Napier opened the door.

“Oh, hello, Joe. How are you doing? How did the big move go?” Robyn said, a welcoming smile on her face.

“I’m good, thanks. And the move was pretty smooth, all things considered.”

“Did you want to come in? Or were you after something? Goodness, is that a pizza?”

“Um, yes, it is. I was actually wondering if I could have a quick word with Hannah?”

Robyn’s smile widened. “Of course you can. Why don’t you come in and I’ll go grab her?”

Joe stepped into the foyer as Robyn disappeared up the hallway. He glanced around as he waited, taking in the fussy wallpaper and antique hat stand in the front hall. Interesting. Not the kind of furnishings he’d imagined a woman like Hannah favoring.

There was a family portrait hanging next to it, a photograph of Robyn and two young girls. He moved closer and recognized the oldest girl as Hannah. He guessed she must have been about twelve or thirteen when it was taken. Her hair was cut short and she wore jeans and a football sweater. She had her arm wrapped protectively around her younger sister and there was a challenge in her eyes as she smiled down the barrel of the camera.

Full of attitude, even at thirteen. It figured.

A door closed somewhere in the house and Joe turned away from the photograph just as Hannah entered the foyer wearing a pale green satin bathrobe. Her hair was wrapped in a towel and she had her arms crossed defensively over her chest as she stopped in front of him. She glanced at the pizza and arched an eyebrow.

“It’s for you. Ruby made it,” he said awkwardly.

She looked different without her coverall or biker gear. Softer. More vulnerable.

“To say thank you for the motorbike ride I didn’t take her on, I assume?” Hannah asked coolly.

He squared his shoulders. “Yeah, about that. I owe you an apology. I jumped to conclusions. I should have let you explain before I barged in.”

“Yep, you should have.”

He shifted his weight. He hadn’t expected her to make it easy for him, but he couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this uncomfortable. “I can’t remember exactly what I said, but I was out of line and I’m sorry.”

“Let me see if I can refresh your memory. Reckless idiot, I think you called me.”

He winced. “I’m sorry.”

She eyed him for a moment, then her gaze dropped to the pizza. “Ruby made this for me—is that what you said?”

“Yes. It’s a Ruby superspecial with the works. Homemade base and everything.”

She held out her hand and he passed the pizza over. Now that her arms weren’t crossed over her chest, he could see the outline of her breasts against her robe. The soft shape of her nipples was clearly visible beneath the silk, and he realized that she must be naked beneath it.

For a moment he got caught on the thought, his mind filling with images of soft skin and even softer curves.

Where the hell did that come from?

He shoved his hands into his pockets. Then he cleared his throat. “Before I go, I wanted to thank you for taking the time to talk with Ruby. I know she probably got in the way. It was kind of you to let her help.”

Hannah gave him a scathing look. “It wasn’t kind. She’s a good kid. Smart, funny. A minor miracle, considering who her father is. But I won’t hold that against her.”

She stepped forward and opened the front door. “Tell Ruby thank you for the pizza,” she said.

His audience was over. He stepped over the threshold and turned to face her. “I will. And I just want to say again—”

The door closed in his face. He blinked, then slowly turned away. Despite everything, a reluctant smile curved his mouth.

Hannah Napier was a handful. He’d got that much right about her.

And despite that, he wanted her.

The realization killed his smile. He hadn’t felt a thing for another woman since Beth died, yet for some crazy reason every time he looked at his new neighbor he found himself thinking things he had no business thinking.

It’s only sex. You haven’t touched a woman in two years. You’re only human.

All true, but somehow not enough to ease the tight feeling in his gut. He didn’t want to be attracted to another woman. He wasn’t over Beth yet, not by a long shot.