Читать книгу A Baby To Save Their Marriage - Scarlet Wilson, Scarlet Wilson - Страница 8

CHAPTER TWO

THREE HOURS LATER they were finally on their flight. Addison had felt herself silently fume as Caleb had spent most of his time on his computer or on his phone in the business lounge while she kept Tristan entertained.

Her head was in turmoil. She wanted to snatch the computer from his hands and search for everything she could find on nuchal screening and being labelled high risk.

But that wouldn’t help her. Nothing would help her right now. Her heart had flip-flopped when Dr Mackay had told her children with Down’s syndrome could have heart problems. Somewhere in the back of her mind she’d heard that before. Weren’t there other associated conditions? She just didn’t know enough about these things. She had no background knowledge in anything medical related.

At some point she would need to tell Caleb about the pregnancy. Then, she’d need to tell him about the phone call.

She wasn’t sure how he would react to any of it.

She was still shocked that he’d actually come.

It was weird. Even though things had been awkward between them, if you’d asked her a few days ago, she would never have thought that Caleb would try and back out of the holiday.

Even though she’d reminded him on a few occasions to pack his case—and he hadn’t got around to it—she’d still hoped he’d remember.

But when he’d been late back today and been so busy on his phone her heart had sunk like a stone. And when he’d actually started to say that he was too busy and the timing didn’t suit she’d wanted to throw something at him.

That had been it. That had been the point that the mist had come down and she’d been at the point of no return. The phone call hadn’t helped. But it hadn’t been the catalyst. Caleb and his complete disregard of her and Tristan had been the catalyst.

When she’d given him the ultimatum she’d actually thought he wouldn’t come. She’d actually thought she’d just called time on their marriage.

She’d had to disappear into one of the empty bathrooms upstairs to allow herself some silent sobs.

All she could think about right now was how she would cope on her own with two children. Tristan was just a ball of energy. He would be over the moon to find out he was going to have a little brother or sister. But Tristan had been a poor sleeper. He’d suffered from colic and no amount of remedies or different kinds of bottles had helped. Sometimes at night he’d screamed for hours. She’d only managed to cope because she’d had Caleb right by her side.

He’d always known when to send her back to bed and disappear with the screaming Tristan downstairs. A few hours later she’d find him slumped on the sofa with a peaceful Tristan sleeping on his chest.

How would she manage if this baby was the same and there was no Caleb to help?

She sucked in a deep breath. She’d never felt so unsettled. She’d never felt so restless. She’d never felt so alone.

She was scared. The next few weeks would tell her everything she needed to know. Whether she was in this alone, or whether her husband would be at her side.

They couldn’t keep going the way they were. Somewhere along the line they’d lost each other.

‘Flight 234 to LAX is now boarding at Gate Twelve.’

She sat upright. ‘Come on, Tristan, that’s us. It’s time to go.’

He scrambled to his feet, anxious to get on board the plane. Caleb was still typing away on his computer.

Addison couldn’t help a silent smirk. When he reached their destination he’d get a huge wake-up call when he realised there was no phone line and no Internet. Did he honestly think it was acceptable to come on holiday with his family and spend his time working?

Sometimes Caleb had rocks in his head.

She boarded the plane with Tristan and helped him set up his television for a kids’ show. She didn’t say a word when Caleb finally sat down next to them.

The stewardess appeared. ‘Champagne?’

‘Apple juice, please.’

Caleb looked surprised but didn’t comment. He accepted the glass of champagne and started sipping.

The ten-hour flight took them well into the middle of the night and Tristan spent a good part of it fast asleep. When they had to change planes at LAX for Tahiti, Caleb carried him through the airport and settled him back into his seat on the next plane.

Eight hours later they switched onto their final fifty-minute flight to the Bora Boras.

As they’d landed in Tahiti his phone had beeped. He’d pulled it out of his pocket, glanced at it and pushed it away again.

She felt a little twinge. Maybe she should warn him that after the next flight he wouldn’t get a signal? But part of her was afraid he might refuse to get on the next plane. And she was just too exhausted to have another fight.

She hadn’t been able to relax on any of the flights so far. She was too keyed up. Her mind was constantly spinning. By the time she reached the Bora Boras she would be fit only to fall into bed.

The small white plane had only fifty passengers. Even though she was absolutely exhausted, the view from the plane was spectacular. The travel agent had told her that writers and artists called the Bora Boras the most beautiful islands in the world. They weren’t wrong.

For this part of the journey, she was glad she was still awake.

The aerial view of the green, jagged volcanic peak of towering Mount Otemanu appeared on the horizon. It was surrounded by a captivating, vivid blue lagoon. As they descended she was amazed by the many blues of the Bora Bora lagoon. It wasn’t one island, instead it was a collection. The airport was on its own islet, one of a number of small barrier islands forming a ring around the lagoon. There were a variety of resorts set on the beautiful sandy beaches. Some extended out over the lagoon with their wooden walkways connecting to thatched-roof over-water bungalows. Others had lodges perched on the steep hillside and some had hideaway villas set right on the water’s edge. Each resort seemed more beautiful than the one before.

Fifty minutes later they had arrived in paradise.

‘Welcome to the Bora Boras,’ shouted the pilot as they landed.

The airport was small. A smart dark-skinned man was waiting with a sign saying Connor.

He gave them a polite nod and took their luggage, guiding them over to a glistening white boat on a wooden pier. Caleb stopped and looked around. The view of the blue lagoon was dazzling, bright turquoise next to white sandy beaches. And even though the lagoon was a hive of activity, it also had an air of tranquillity about it.

‘Wow,’ he said quietly.

Addison pressed her lips together. This was entirely what she’d wanted to capture. A bit of peace. A bit of luxury. And a bit of togetherness. Would they really be able to capture all three?

‘We get to go on a boat!’ shouted Tristan. She’d no idea where he got his energy from. After twenty hours of travel she’d expected him to be as exhausted as she was. But he’d slept part way on both flights while, no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t sleep sitting up.

They climbed on board the sleek white boat. Tristan ran up to the front where he could watch the boat being steered. It didn’t take long to cross the beautiful lagoon and drop them at their resort where they were met with staff greeting them with fresh leis, who picked up their bags and checked them in. Their bungalow sat on the white sandy beach. It had a large sitting room and kitchen, with two bedrooms and a master suite that opened out onto the beach. The rooms were luxurious while still paying homage to the Polynesian style. They also had a small over-water bungalow with thatched roof and walkway and its own hot tub. Tristan couldn’t hide his excitement when he saw the glass panel in the floor with fish swimming underneath in the tropical waters. ‘Look, Mummy, look!’

It couldn’t be more perfect. She’d been nervous about them staying in the bungalows over water since Tristan was coming with them. But this had been a compromise. This way she had the safety of a beach house with the magic of the water bungalow too.

She unpacked their clothes as Caleb looked around. The first thing he unpacked was his computer. Apart from when stepping off the plane, he hadn’t really taken in the beauty around them.

She tried to hide her frustration but twenty hours of travel would wear anyone’s patience thin.

She dug out Tristan’s beach wear and covered him in suncream. It took him less than a minute to run across the sand and start digging with his spade and splashing in the water. She changed into her swimming costume and arranged herself under the nearby parasol and sun lounger where she could watch him.

Her peace lasted less than five minutes.

‘How do I connect to the Internet?’ Caleb asked from the doorway of the bungalow.

‘You don’t.’

He frowned. ‘What do you mean?’

She shook her head. ‘There is no Internet.’

The furrows on his brow deepened. He hadn’t changed his clothes or stopped to appreciate their surroundings. ‘There has to be. Where is the phone line?’

She shrugged. ‘I don’t think there is one. There’s an intercom that links to Reception if we need anything. I think we just use that.’

She was doing her absolute best to appear casual. It was pretty ironic really since she was staring over at the volcanic peak of Mount Otemanu. She absolutely knew that when he realised there was definitely no phone or Internet he’d go off with more explosions than Mount Otemanu ever had.

The doors to the house were wide open so she could hear him moving around inside. Part of her felt a little sad. They’d just landed in paradise and he hadn’t come out to play with his son in the sand, or to sit next to her on the sun lounger. It made her absolutely determined that she’d made the right decision. She needed a chance to see her husband again. She needed a chance to see how he was without any of the trappings of work attached to him. They needed a chance to be stripped bare. And this was the only place to do it. There was no room for distractions here. It was just them, and Tristan.

And the secret baby package.

She looked back at the bungalow and watched as he paced around inside, stressing and searching the room for any hidden phone lines or Wi-Fi connections.

The Caleb Connor that she’d met ten years ago would never have stressed about being constantly connected to the world. He would never have spent time on holiday virtually ignoring his wife and child.

This was the life she led now. And this was the reason she knew she had to take a step to see if this marriage could be saved. She would never introduce another child into this way of life.

Oh, no matter what the outcome of this holiday, she would always have this baby. But she wanted to be prepared. She wanted to have time to plan, to know whether she would be doing this alone or not—particularly if she and her baby needed additional support.

One in one hundred and forty. Most people would think the odds were in their favour.

In one hundred and thirty-nine chances the baby wouldn’t be affected.

But in one of those chances it would.

She’d thought about this before. When she’d had Tristan she’d been told she was low risk. But her midwife had carefully explained that low risk didn’t equal no risk. There was always that possibility. And she’d understood that then, just as she did now.

It was amazing how much this had caused her to focus. The holiday had been booked. Since she’d found out she was pregnant she knew she needed to deal with the elephant in the room. In fact, she was pretty sure an elephant could have been sitting in their front room and Caleb wouldn’t have noticed. That was how distant he’d been.

The distance made her uncomfortable. It reminded her of a time before—a time that seemed a little hazy for her—a time where the distance between them had been her fault. She squeezed her eyes closed for a second. She didn’t like to remember anything about that.

She heard a loud beep. It was Caleb on the intercom. ‘How do I connect to the Internet?’

The bright sing-song voice answered straight away. ‘No Internet here. Sorry.’

‘What do you mean there’s no Internet? Everywhere has Internet. There must be somewhere I can get a connection?’ She could hear the anger in his voice. It drifted out of the doors towards them and Tristan, who had come back to play next to her, looked up from digging in the sand. She shook her head and he put his head back down and kept building his castle.

‘No connection on the Bora Boras, sir.’

‘What about a phone? Can I have access to a phone?’

‘Only radio contact with the mainland, sir. That’s the beauty of our resort. Most people come here specially.’

She heard the click again then the thudding footsteps. A few seconds later the small amount of sun sneaking under the parasol was blocked out.

He had his hands on his hips. His lips were pressed tightly together and there was a tic in his jaw. ‘Tell me you know where the Wi-Fi is.’ There was a tad of desperation in his voice.

She pushed her sunglasses up on her head and pressed her hand against her chest in mock horror. ‘There’s no Wi-Fi?’ She sagged back against the sun lounger. ‘Tragedy.’ She shot him a little smile. ‘Your computer and phone will probably spontaneously combust now. Just as well there’s a perfect ocean to throw them in.’

He sighed and sat down, running his fingers through his hair. ‘Oh, Addison. I’m in the middle of a deal right now. This could make or break our company. The only reason I came was because I knew I could still work remotely.’

‘And that’s why I didn’t tell you.’

She put her hand on Tristan’s shoulder. ‘Why don’t you go inside and have a little lie down for a while? I’ll come inside and put a DVD on for you.’ He disappeared quickly into the bungalow.

Addison swung her legs around and stood up, the warm sand beneath her feet.

‘You’re absolutely right. I deliberately picked a place with no phone and no Internet. Ask yourself why. You’ve forgotten we even exist. You treat us as if we’re not important. This deal could make or break your company?’ She waved her hand. ‘I’ve heard that for the last three years. Maybe the first time I believed it. But every time after that? I don’t think so.’

She stepped closer to him. Close enough that she could see the exhaustion in his face and the fine lines that had appeared all around his eyes. ‘What I do believe is that the only reason you came is because you thought you could work here remotely.’ She shook her head. ‘Think about that for a minute, Caleb. Just think about it. Do you think that’s normal for a family holiday? Do you think that’s what most husbands and fathers do on holiday?’

He at least had the good sense to look embarrassed. ‘You know how important this is.’

‘No, Caleb. I know how important you think it is. There’s a difference. I think you’ll find that in the scale of life it’s not that important at all.’

Now he looked annoyed again. ‘Well, in order to pay the mortgage and the bills I think you’ll find work is important.’

‘More important than your family?’

He waved his hand. ‘Now you’re just being ridiculous.’

‘No. No, I’m not. And don’t worry about your business. Harry will deal with everything. He’s more than capable.’

‘And how do you know that?’

She sighed. ‘Because I spoke to him before we left. He knew that once you got here you’d have no phone, no Internet.’

Caleb looked stunned. ‘What? Harry knew?’

She started to walk away. She’d had enough of this. ‘Of course he knew. Seems like he didn’t think it was such a bad idea. And you can stop checking your phone for emails or messages. There are no signal towers out here. I’m actually surprised Harry messaged you at all.’

Caleb shook his head. ‘Earlier? In Tahiti? It wasn’t Harry. It was Reuben.’

She couldn’t help it. She raised her eyebrows. She always did that when she heard this name. ‘Reuben Tyler? What did he want?’

Caleb shrugged. ‘He needed somewhere to stay. His flat’s got asbestos in the roof. I told him he could stay at ours.’

Her mouth fell open. ‘You did what?’

He seemed surprised. ‘What’s the big deal? We’re not there. The house is empty.’

‘Oh, no.’ Now she started pacing. ‘The house isn’t empty. Lara. Lara’s in the house.’

Now Caleb looked confused. ‘Why would Lara be in the house? I never saw her.’

Addison spun around. ‘She appeared just before you did. Seems she went home and found her boyfriend in bed with the neighbour.’ She threw up her hands. ‘This is what I’m talking about, Caleb. She was right there. Right there sitting in our kitchen. You didn’t even notice.’

He frowned. ‘Reuben will be expecting the place to be empty. That’s what I told him.’

‘And Lara will be expecting to have the house to herself. She needs a bit of time to sort herself out. The last thing she needs right now is Reuben Tyler. She won’t even know who he is.’

Caleb shook his head. ‘Well, it’s too late now. They’ll both be in the house and according to you we have no way to get in touch.’

Addison cringed. He was right. There was no way to get in touch. The world seemed to love Reuben Tyler but she didn’t. Probably because she’d walked in one night just as he’d taken a swing at her husband. Caleb had said it was nothing. But it wasn’t nothing to her.

‘There’s really no Internet?’

‘We’re back to that again?’

He nodded. She could see the stress on his face. It was practically emanating from his pores. Part of her felt a tiny bit sorry for him. It was like going cold turkey. But there was nothing he could do.

She folded her arms across her chest. ‘There is no Internet, Caleb. It’s four weeks. Live with it.’

He took a deep breath and turned towards her. His brown eyes fixed on hers. It was the first time in for ever that he’d really looked at her. Really looked at her.

‘What’s going on with you, Addison?’

She blinked. ‘What’s going on with me? Are you serious?’

Why did every conversation feel as if it ended up as a fight?

‘Yeah, I’m serious. I can’t believe what you said to me back home.’

‘And I can’t believe you came home from work an hour before we were due to leave and thought you would tell me you weren’t coming on holiday. At what point in your life did that seem okay to you?’

‘Everything is a fight with you these days.’

He’d just echoed her thoughts. She thought this was all him. Was he trying to imply it was her too?

It lit a fuse in her. How dared he? Didn’t he know what she’d just been told? Didn’t he understand how worried she was?

Of course he didn’t. She hadn’t told him yet.

And at some point she’d need to.

Just not yet. Not until she knew.

She didn’t want to tell him about the pregnancy. She didn’t want to tell him about the scary news. She didn’t need her husband to feel sorry for her. She needed him to love her. To love her enough to feel as if he could be there and support her.

Telling him about the pregnancy right now could make him tell her everything would be fine. And knowing Caleb, he’d probably think it would be. Then he’d go right home and start working hundred-hour weeks again.

She needed more than that. She needed more for this marriage.

‘How can everything be a fight when you’re never there?’

He sighed. ‘You work too. There’s been nights when you’ve been busy too. There have been events you’ve had to go to—people you’ve had to meet.’

She nodded her head. ‘You’re absolutely right. But the difference between you and me is that, when I know I’m going to be out at night, I make sure I’ve spent time with Tristan during the day.’

‘That’s easy for you to do.’

‘Actually, it isn’t. But I make the time.’

She bit her lip. Everything was a fight between them right now. And she hated that.

‘Always fault-finding, always criticising. Can I ever do anything right in your eyes these days?’

And it looked as if this was going to become a fight too.

Trouble was, she was just too tired for this. She wasn’t sure if it was the travel that had exhausted her, or the pregnancy. She could remember at this stage in her pregnancy with Tristan she’d come home from work and go straight to bed. In those days, Caleb would just come to bed with her.

She turned away. She just wanted to sleep now. She couldn’t even be bothered changing out of her swimsuit.

‘You gave me an ultimatum.’ His voice was quiet, almost whispered. It was as if he was still getting over the shock. ‘Why would you do that? It was just straight out of the blue.’

She stopped walking. Her hand was on the door. From here she could see that Tristan was already sleeping. She hadn’t even got around to putting the DVD on. That was fine. She would just climb in next to him.

She kept her voice low too. ‘It wasn’t out of the blue, Caleb. This has been building for the last few years. We’ve slipped away from each other—we’ve lost each other...’ her voice started to break ‘...and I’ve had enough. I can’t live like this any more because I don’t feel as if I’m living.’

She glanced over her shoulder. ‘This is it for us, Caleb. I chose this place deliberately because I didn’t want Tristan and I to compete with your work any more. Some people think this place is paradise. You? I think you’ve barely noticed. We came here because I wanted to see if we had anything left worth saving. Because right now—I just don’t know.’

She took one final look. He looked as if she’d just punched him in the guts.

So she turned, and went to bed.