Читать книгу A Rock And A Hard Place - Shane Townsend - Страница 8

CHAPTER 3

But let me back up for a minute so I can explain what drove me to the point where I felt that I had to take such drastic and foolhardy action. I have a long history of bad choices whether they be the decisions to commit various crimes or my choices in women. I have done time for infractions or the law relating to some of them. Usually it was a choice between me enduring the struggle as a square and me taking the easy way out.

I thought that I had left all of that behind me. During my last incarceration, I had supposedly wised up. I realized that that prison shit was tired, and frankly I was sick of the shit. I knew that all the aptitude tests I had taken in prison weren’t lying and that I possessed the intelligence and potential needed to be successful in any endeavor that I wanted to pursue if I just put my mind to it. All I had to do was stop dwelling on my past, forgive others their transgressions, stop blaming “the man,” and cease my criminal, abusive, misogynistic ways. Not an easy task but definitely doable.

There was a long period of time then that I was doing everything that needed to be done to make me a better person and help me remain free. I was drug- and alcohol-free, and I was attending AA and NA on a regular basis. Thoughts of higher learning had entered my mind. I had my own place and a minivan that I had purchased. I was working a square ass gig and living a square ass life in general. I was enjoying my new life and my freedom immensely.

There were a few random women in my life at that time but nobody special. All of them were women I had been hooking up with before I had gotten locked up. Not one of them broads had maintained contact with me or sent me money while I was gone. You know how it goes. Out of sight, out of mind. So while fucking them was all right, there was no possibility of anything meaningful with any of them. I was looking for a lady whom I could be my new, more respectful, more caring self with, but none of them fit the bill.

Then I met Brandy.