Читать книгу Getting Pregnant For Dummies - Sharon Perkins - Страница 132

“Another child is a bonus,” a friend once said in describing her desire to have another child. She and her husband are forever grateful for their beautiful daughter, and their one and only has given them their dream and a wonderful life to go along with it. This friend has not conceived again since her four-year-old daughter was born, but she has stood by her promise. While she may occasionally dream of giving her child a sibling, she is ultimately happy and satisfied.

While this mindset may be an ideal, it is certainly not shared by most and more often forgotten by many. Secondary infertility can, and often is, every bit as painful as the first go-round. Some friends have said that it can be even more difficult. Suddenly, you are thrust into the world of children where everything seems to come in pairs, if not higher multiples. The “lonely only” child is regarded by many in the child-abundant world as somehow missing out, whether it be in social interaction or family dynamics.

You can’t miss out on what you don’t have. Children without siblings tend to be higher achievers, quite social, and often leaders in society. And you can certainly have spoiled, lonely, or maladjusted children, even amongst large sibling groups. “I don’t want my only child to grow up spoiled,” whine many parents. Yet, upon having baby number 2, many of these families find that indeed they don’t have one spoiled child anymore, they now have two! Remember, history repeats itself. Don’t assume that another child will miraculously convert you … or your parenting skills. That’s a job that you have to do, whether with 1 child or 20.