Читать книгу His Unexpected Baby Bombshell - Сорейя Лейн - Страница 11

CHAPTER FOUR

“SHE’S BEAUTIFUL.”

Rebecca ran her eyes over every inch of the horse. It wasn’t hard to act interested—the filly was one of the most beautiful animals she had ever seen. Endless black legs, four white socks and a silky long tail. Her face was framed by a wide white blaze, stretching all the way to her nostrils; dark brown eyes like pools of trust, following every movement she and Ben made.

He didn’t say anything, just watched the horse, arms slung over the corral fence, one foot resting on the lowest tread of timber.

“So, what’s the deal with her?”

Ben shrugged, broad shoulders moving under his shirt. She was glad to have the distraction of the horse, because she was finding it almost impossible not to stare at him.

“She’s had all the guys on, doesn’t seem to like them.”

“How about you?” Rebecca asked. “Does she like you?”

He laughed. “Nope, not particularly.”

They looked at one another. They were both thinking the same thing, Rebecca could tell by the look in his eyes. There had always been the odd horse that had worked better for one of them or the other, it was about personalities, the rider clicking with beast. But there had been one very special mare who’d only ever worked for Rebecca, to the point where Gus had decided the horse was useless for anyone else, and had given her over to Bec. It had all worked well, her dream come true to own such an amazing mare, until the accident. She’d lost her nerve, and her will to ride, and her beautiful mare had lost her life. The memory flash made her skin prickle. And then she’d lost her best friend, all in the course of a couple of months, as well as her dreams of making it big in the polo world. She’d never gotten over that period in her life, had always just pushed it from her mind, but her pain was still raw.

Ben let out a big breath of air and gave her a smile—a slow rise of his mouth, followed by a gentle wink. It was as if he had put his arm around her, comforted her, just by looking at her. No one else had ever made her feel quite like Ben could. Embraced, comforted, cared for, all in a single look. Pity it had taken her so many years to figure out that she was in love with him. When they’d finally taken that step, he was gone, and then she went from losing a friend to nursing a broken heart. Ben had never said anything, never told her that he thought of her as any more than a friend, and so she’d just kept her mouth shut and let him get on with his life.

“So what do you think?”

Rebecca raised her eyes. What did she think? Her mind was racing, took her a moment to remember what they were even talking about. And then she glanced at the filly before them.

Ben was watching her, waiting for her answer. But here, back on a horse again, after all this time?

“I, ah, don’t think so.”

Ben stepped up onto the railing and hauled himself into the corral. “If I persist long enough, she’ll let me catch her, but she’s wild when anyone tries to get near her.”

“And you expect me to do what you guys can’t?”

Ben walked backward until his back was pressed against the wooden rails, before climbing up to sit on the fence.

“You know you can do it, Bec.”

Rebecca stayed on the other side of the fence, close to Ben but not quite touching. It was tempting, she could admit that, but there was no way she was up to it. No way she could summon the courage to climb on a spirited horse and stay calm enough and confident enough to be in control. Not after all this time.

“What’s her name?”

Ben turned and smiled. “That mean you’re ready to give it a go?”

She laughed, shaking her head as she looked back at the horse. No, all it meant was she was trying to change the subject.

“Missy,” he told her. “Her name’s Missy.”

Rebecca kept watching the horse. Missy. She played the name through her mind. It was a pretty name, but it didn’t make any difference. She wasn’t going near her.

“What do you say?”

“Just give me some time.” The words came out before she could think longer. And she wasn’t even sure she was still talking about horses.

Ben jumped off the fence and landed on the hard packed dirt, his feet falling inches away from hers. Rebecca had a funny feeling she would live to regret that comment. There was no way he was going to let her leave at the end of this weekend without trying her luck with that horse, and the very idea terrified her. She didn’t know if it was simply losing her nerve or just the years of not riding catching up on her, but she couldn’t even comprehend climbing back into the saddle, with or without Ben egging her on.

He stood close to her, too close, and their eyes met for just a second. It was long enough to feel like one second too long, though. Neither of them knew what to say. Ben because he wasn’t the type to just come out and say something, and her because she had too much to hide. Too much at stake. Just being with him was a risk, or at least it was until she was ready to come clean and tell him what she’d done. It wasn’t that she was going to keep it from him, she just wanted to do it right, to break it to him the right way, if that was even possible.

* * *

Rebecca walked beside Ben. She was listening to him but her eyes were floating around their surroundings, drinking in the familiar sights she had gone so long without seeing.

“What do you think?”

She turned her attention back to Ben. She had no idea what he was talking about. Again.

Gus appeared ahead of them and saved her from having to answer. He leaned against the corner of the stable block, resting a leg, but he was smiling. Rebecca guessed that he was probably feeling worse than he let on, but this was his life. The alternative was to cart him off to hospital, or a rest home, and what good would that do him? He deserved to be here till his last day, doing what he loved.

“So when are you two going off for a ride?”

Rebecca laughed and glanced at Ben. She hoped that he hadn’t put his grandfather up to it. “I’m not sure I’ll be riding at all this weekend. These days I prefer my feet firmly on the ground.”

“Do you remember Willy?” Gus asked

She nodded. “Who could forget him?” Although as she said it, she was wondering if it was a trick question. “He must be, what? Twenty...twenty-two years old now?” He’d been Gus’s horse when she was a teenager. The most reliable, safe, sweet horse she’d ever come across, and he’d been Gus’s pride and joy.

“Sure is. I can’t ride anymore and he’s going to waste just sitting around. Thought he could do with a walk around the farm. What do you say?”

Rebecca took a step backward and walked straight smack bang into Ben. He must have stopped right behind her, his large frame preventing her from making a getaway. She lurched forward and felt trapped. Backward meant into Ben and forward meant the horse. She didn’t know what scared her more. Her heart was hammering, although the idea of falling back into the warmth of Ben’s body was sounding like the more attractive option right now.

“I, ah, I don’t know, Gus. Really, I...”

“Are you telling me you came all the way here without your riding gear?”

Gulp. He had her there. Yes, she had brought it, but with no intention of actually putting it on. She eyed up the horse some more and felt a lump of genuine terror knot in her throat, but at least riding would give her a distraction aside from Ben.

“How about it, Bec?”

Ben placed his hands on either side of her arms, still standing behind her. It was nothing more than a gentle press of his skin against hers, but it sent a butterfly-soft shiver down her back. He was too close and it was only making her feel more guilty about everything, like a traitor for even being there.

Gus was watching her, Ben was touching her, even the horse seemed to be staring at her, waiting for her answer.

“Okay fine, I’ll do it.”

Maybe it was the pressure, the sun making her giddy, hell, it might have even been the way Ben was looking at her, but she felt her resolve buckle. But all of a sudden going for a trail ride didn’t seem like the stupidest idea in the world.

“Okay?” Ben seemed doubtful, and Gus winked before leaving them to it.

“Don’t sound so surprised,” she muttered.

She knew this was only the start of it, or maybe it wasn’t. Because once she told Ben the truth he’d never forgive her, and then she’d never be invited back ever again.

“Do you want to go get changed?” Ben asked.

He looked her up and down, and Rebecca tried not to laugh as a smile kicked the corners of her mouth up. “I’ve never ridden in a sundress and sandals before, and I’m not about to start.”

She turned and headed back to the car as Ben laughed, wanting to look back at him but not letting herself. There was something about Ben, there always had been; a quiet strength about him that she’d been drawn to when they were both only at school, and that confidence had translated into a super sexy guy. There was nothing arrogant about him even though he’d played with the best polo players in the world, and his manner with animals? That had always set him apart from any man she’d ever met before. And it was why he’d be such a darn good father. She swallowed hard and tried not to think about what-ifs—Ben had made it clear he wasn’t ever going to have a family of his own, that he wouldn’t ever repeat the mistakes his own mom had made, and she knew that his hurt ran so deep that nothing, nothing, was capable of changing his mind. Which was why she’d kept her secret all this time. But now it was time for him to decide, for him to be the one to make that choice.

She tugged the car door open and grabbed her bag. All of her other belongings were in a small suitcase, but her riding clothes were in the same bag they’d always been in. She pulled back the zip and just looked at them for a moment, before sucking up all her jitters and swallowing them away.

She looked around to check she was alone, then took off her sandals and replaced them with socks and pulled her jodhpurs over her ankles and up her thighs. The material stretched tight, but she was pleased to be able to do the waist up. Years on, not to mention one child later, and she could still fit into the tight breeches—it was a good feeling.

Rebecca tugged her dress over her shoulders and placed it on the backseat, before grabbing her former favorite faded gray Pearl Jam T-shirt she had once worn on a daily basis. She searched for a tie in the glove box and then yanked her hair into a plait, before grabbing her helmet and gloves and closing the car door.

This was it. It was now or never.

Ben emerged from around the side of the stables, sitting astride a striking chestnut horse, and leading Willy on his left. She drew in a big breath of air and marched onward, trying hard to keep her smile from faltering.

“You look good.”

His words made her smile, even if she didn’t believe him for a second. “Liar liar pants on fire,” she joked. “But thanks for the compliment.”

“Need a hand getting on?” he asked.

“Nah, I’m fine.” She was lying, but she’d rather struggle on without any assistance from Ben. His hands anywhere near her body right now was not a good idea.

She took the reins and lifted her left leg, hopping on one foot as she tried to get it high enough to get her left one through the stirrup.

“Not quite as flexible as you used to be, huh?”

Ben dismounted and moved to help her. Heat flooded Rebecca’s face as he touched her shoulder, laughing softly.

“If it makes you feel any better, some of the guys I rode with in Argentina spent half their lives on horseback and could only mount if they were standing on a fence.”

Rebecca grimaced. She hadn’t realized that getting on the horse would be the tough part.

“Here.”

Ben cupped his hands and indicated for her to put her knee up. She did, his strong palms closing around her leg, sending spasms of warmth through her body.

“Thanks,” she said. “On three.”

She bounced three times before Ben sprang her into the air, and straight on to Willy’s back. She landed with a soft thump and felt that all too familiar turmoil in her stomach. The accident hit her memory bank like it was yesterday.

She was about to jump straight off when Ben placed a hand to her thigh, almost sending her flying off the other side. All those years they had touched, slept side by side in sleeping bags, sat close, and there had never been a reaction like that. It was as if that one night all those years ago was still pulling them together; their skin still reactive to the pressure of one another’s touch. His hand felt hot, heating through the fabric of her jodhpurs, and she knew he felt it, too.

“You’re okay,” he soothed, never taking his eyes off her.

She swallowed a lump that felt as big as a rock and nodded. Suddenly the horse seemed like the safe bet.

Ben raised his other hand to shield his eyes from the sun, gave her one of his sexy-as-heck winks and then turned back to his horse.

“You’ll be just fine.”

All of a sudden she knew she was right. It wasn’t the horse she needed to be scared of. Danger had just looked her straight in the eye and she’d managed to survive it. For now.