Читать книгу Every Boy's Dream Dad - Sue MacKay - Страница 9

RACHEL groaned and rolled over to see what the time was.

Four twenty-five. She gave another, louder groan. Those blasted roosters. Her head flopped back on the pillow and she absorbed all the foreign sounds of this tiny nation waking up. Birds she didn’t recognise were also making their morning calls. An occasional motor scooter chugged past her front lawn. A cow mooed from somewhere on the hill behind the house.

She stretched and grinned. It was kind of exciting being in such a different environment. She couldn’t be further from the chilly grey of London with the millions of people and the relentless traffic. And her parents. Her grin slipped.

Mum had been devastated when she’d heard Rachel’s plans but had also been encouraging about taking a chance on a new life. If only Dad had shown signs of opening up to Riley she mightn’t have come. But … she shrugged … dreams were free, and here she was, following one a very long way from her messed-up family.

Yesterday, as she’d watched Riley excitedly taking in the sights of odd-shaped trees with their green coconuts, the funny birds, the beach that followed them right around the island, she’d believed this had been the correct thing to do. On the day they’d arrived Riley had been tired and belligerent after the tedious hours spent in planes and airports. But yesterday he’d been full of beans, and paddling in the beautiful and safe lagoon had been a highlight for both of them.

Slipping out of bed, Rachel shrugged into a short satin robe and headed to the kitchen. A cup of tea on the tiny front deck while she watched the sun rise would be the perfect start to the day.

‘Morning, Doctor,’ Effie greeted her. ‘You want a drink? I boiled the water for you.’

Startled, Rachel spun around. ‘Effie. How’s that head? And your thigh?’ The colours from her bruises highlighting the little woman’s face were impressive. ‘I thought you’d still be asleep.’

‘I’m always up early.’ She held a cup out to Rachel. ‘What do you like?’

‘Tea, thank you, but you don’t have to run around after me.’

‘You fix my leg for me. Why don’t I make your tea?’

How logical. ‘Do you have children to get home to?’

Effie told her, ‘My daughter, Nina, gets herself to school, but last night she stayed with a friend.’ Effie’s voice brightened. ‘She’s fourteen. After school she goes to the grocery shop to work.’ She nodded through the window at the bungalow next door. ‘I’ll go to work for Ben this morning.’

Ben. Rachel turned to stare across the fence at the white bungalow with all its windows wide open. No need to lock up around here, Rachel mused. But, then, who would be game enough to take on such a big man as the local policeman, anyway?

Ben. A man of few words. Last night his abrupt departure had annoyed her. The fact he hadn’t made any mention of seeing her later rankled. She wanted to see him, get to know him a little better.

Thinking about her new neighbour made her tummy quiver as heat unfurled and unfamiliar desire rose. She’d tossed and turned half the night, wondering what it would be like to have him make love to her.

That body was something else. Jamie had also been a large man in superb physical condition so she knew exactly how those muscles would feel under her hands. Could imagine them rippling as her fingers slid over them. She blinked and turned back into the room.

‘How long have you been keeping house for Ben?’ she asked Effie.

‘Since he came more than two years ago.’ Effie giggled. ‘He’s messy. Clothes everywhere, plates and cups in the sink. Naughty man, I tell him, but he only laughs.’

So the man had flaws. Rachel grinned. Flaws were good, perfection was daunting. Then she had a brainwave. ‘Do you want more work? I need someone to do my housework too. I’m only working nine to three most days unless there’s an emergency, but I want to spend my free time with Riley, not on the end of a broom. At least until he’s settled.’

Effie’s face spread into a wide smile, lighting up the morning. ‘I’d love to help you, Doctor. I can clean the house, do the washing and ironing, look after your little boy if you’re late home. How many hours?’

Rachel smiled at Effie’s enthusiasm. ‘I don’t know yet. Can I tell you later when I’ve got myself a little bit more sorted?’ She would need to see how long it took her to get settled.

‘Want me to help unpack all those boxes?’

‘I’d love you to, but I still haven’t decided where everything will go.’ She’d had far too much furniture sent out.

‘That’s okay. You call me when you’re ready. Ben will tell you where I live. Here’s your tea.’

Rachel took the proffered cup. ‘Thank you very much. I’ll take a look at your wounds before you leave.’

‘Thanks, Doctor, but they’ll be all right. I’m going next door now to make Ben his bacon and eggs. He gets up early too.’

Rachel pulled a chair out from the table. ‘Ben can wait a few more minutes while I check you over.’

Effie laughed as she sat down. ‘You’re not as stern as you try to sound.’

‘Must be losing my touch.’ Rachel pulled on gloves then quickly tugged off the gauze covering Effie’s wounds. ‘Looking good. Don’t get these wet, though. No shower, no swimming.’

Effie looked shocked. ‘No shower?’

‘Have a wash down.’ Rachel tried to examine the bruised eye but gave up when Effie groaned. ‘Sorry.’

‘It’s okay, Doctor.’

‘You never said how you fell.’

‘Skidded on the clean floor and banged into the glass door. Broke it, and hit my head on the corner of the bench on the way down.’ Effie gave a rueful smile. ‘Now I’ve got to go. That Ben needs feeding.’

Effie trotted down the path, favouring her injured leg, and ducked through the fence. Rachel suppressed the light envy that tripped through her. Effie was going to see Ben. And she wasn’t.

What a darned shame. She couldn’t think of a better way to start the day than rolling over in bed and finding Ben beside her. Which only went to show how much notice she took of her own warnings. Ben was out of bounds. Full stop. But he was a neighbour. She couldn’t avoid him, didn’t want to avoid him. But nothing. Ben was a handful of firm muscle, had a touch of arrogance, and, if the way he’d seen to Effie last night was anything to go by, he was someone who’d definitely put himself out there to care for others. Which made him a hero of sorts.

And she would never, ever go near a hero kind of guy again. Since when had she got over Jamie’s death enough to even be thinking about another man? The shock of losing her husband so suddenly still woke her at the deepest part of the night, sometimes with tears saturating her pillow. Her anger at Jamie was real but she missed him terribly. She wasn’t ready to move on. She might never be. The thought of suffering that kind of pain and grief again had so far stopped her wanting to get involved with another man.

What about having an affair? With someone as scorching hot as Ben? Her eyes drifted to Ben’s house. It would be so easy. Too easy. Until it was over and then what? Every morning she’d sit out on her deck and he’d be just over the fence. She’d be straining her ears to hear the slightest sound, be watching furtively for a glimpse of him. The island was too small to avoid anyone for very long. Life would be difficult if not impossible because she wasn’t the kind of woman to have a fling and walk away. Even in a brief, totally sexual encounter she gave too much of herself, needed too much back. She didn’t do sex for the sake of it. She’d tried it once while at university and had got burnt—nobody’s fault but her own. So, no fling with her neighbour.

Disappointment tugged her shoulders down. Tipping the tea away, Rachel concentrated on making another cup, this time black.

Three hours later Rachel had Riley dressed, breakfasted, and ready to start out on their first proper day in the islands. The rest of the unpacking would have to wait.

‘Need a lift?’ The deep, gruff voice of last night’s dreams broke through her thoughts from her back door.

Stomping down on a sudden burst of excitement, Rachel reluctantly told Ben, ‘Thanks, but we’re catching the bus.’

Hot damn. He looked good in his freshly pressed uniform. The light blue of his shirt accentuated the black of his eyes and hair. His biceps filled the sleeves in a mouthwatering way. The black trousers fitted perfectly. He had a body to die for. She grinned. She’d been doing a lot of that since arriving here. But who could blame her? Then Ben’s left eyebrow rose and she switched the grin off.

Riley slowly approached, shy of Ben today. ‘You read me a story last night.’

Ben bent down to his level. ‘Hey, kid, good morning.’

Those trousers stretching across Ben’s butt accentuated the very tidy shape. A shape she’d love to cup with her hands, to feel his hot flesh against her palms. Rachel closed her eyes briefly. To stop herself staring. To prevent Ben seeing the lust she knew would be gleaming there. To get herself back under control. What was wrong with her this morning? One glimpse of a man in a uniform and she was having X-rated thoughts. Oh, no. She wasn’t a uniform follower, surely? Jamie had always looked dashing in his and she’d loved ogling him. Clearly it was the uniform and not Ben that had her in such a stew. Thank goodness she’d said no to the ride.

But Riley wrecked everything by suddenly opening up to Ben, a big, peanut-butter-smeared smile on his face. ‘Can I have a ride with you in the police truck? Can we have the lights flashing?’

Ben looked bamboozled at the onslaught. ‘No lights.’

Rachel reacted without thought. ‘No, Riley. You’re not racing around the island in a police car. Taking a ride with Ben is one thing but I’ll not have you thinking you’re playing cops with him.’ Her son was not going to be a policeman. He would grow up with a balanced outlook on helping people. He would not think he had to rush in fearlessly to save people while putting himself in danger at the same time.

‘All boys want to be a policeman or fireman. It goes with the genes.’

Obviously she was meant to take him seriously. ‘Not my boy.’

‘Your call.’ Ben shrugged eloquently, letting her know he didn’t agree. Too bad. Riley was her responsibility.

Riley looked from Rachel to Ben and back. Then an abrupt subject change. ‘I’m going to play with Harry today.’

Rachel’s throat blocked. Riley had turned to Ben as though it was the most natural thing in the world. Which it definitely was not for her sad little boy. But for some inexplicable reason Ben seemed to touch a chord with Riley that no other man had since Jamie’s death. Because Ben didn’t try too hard? Fear gripped her. Was this a good idea? What if Riley got too close to him? It would break his little heart all over again when they moved on. This wasn’t a permanent destination for them. At least she hadn’t planned on it being so.

Ben glanced at her. ‘I’m leaving in five.’

Yes, so? ‘We’re going to the hospital.’

‘I go past the front door.’

The main road did not go that close to the hospital. But it would be easier to catch a ride with Ben and not have to walk up the hill to the hospital with her bag while towing Riley along as well. ‘Then thank you, I accept.’

‘Okay.’

‘Can I throw a box of medical books in your vehicle?’

‘No problem.’ He headed back down the path.

Rachel stared at his departing back. That’s it? The man had no conversational skills whatsoever. Or was that something he’d deliberately cultivated to keep people at bay? If so, why?

Come to think about it, why was someone as obviously bright and ambitious as Ben living in Rarotonga? She had nothing against Rarotonga, but she couldn’t imagine that the police department in a community this size had a lot of complex cases for him to sink his teeth into. Something about this scenario did not ring true.

But, hey, look who’s talking? You’re here, aren’t you? Lissie may have sweet-talked her into giving it a try, but she hadn’t come here because she couldn’t keep up with the best of them back in London. And she definitely wasn’t going backwards by working for a small country. If anything, her qualifications would be enhanced with the women’s clinic she was setting up.

So she had no place speculating on Ben’s reasons for being here. But she was interested in him and wanted to know what made him tick. Her mouth twitched as she fought a grin. A perfect excuse to be nosy. Better be a little cautious, though. He might bite. Now, there was a thought. Her skin cells danced in happy anticipation even though that wasn’t going to happen.

Ben carried the doc’s box of books into her office while she jabbered on with the woman who’d taken up the post as the doc’s secretary, Colleen. In her fifties, Colleen and her husband, Ed, had moved over from Wellington for the warmer climate in the hope it would ease Ed’s arthritis. According to Lissie, Colleen was efficiency personified, and would have the doc so organised the only thing she’d have to do on her own was breathe.

A huge vase of red-and-yellow hibiscus blooms sat in the centre of the desk. New pens and a large pad had been lined up neatly. The doc probably wouldn’t realise how much she was wanted and needed here.

‘Wow, are those for me? What a lovely surprise.’ Rachel spoke up behind him, making him start. Brushing past him, her arm slid across his and he had to fight the urge to haul her against him. Imagine if he did. There’d be fireworks for sure.

‘They’re all yours,’ he croaked.

‘Makes me feel very special.’

‘Watch out for ants.’ When her exquisitely styled eyebrows arched at him, Ben added, ‘Off the flowers.’

She placed her medical bag on the desk.

His warning obviously hadn’t sunk in. ‘Your bag. Ants.’

Her pale face turned a dusky pink. ‘Okay, slow learner.’ Her bow-shaped mouth curved into a sweet smile that twisted his belly and flooded him with warmth. Rachel’s glance checked the empty shelves, the hospital bed pushed against one wall, and she chuckled. ‘Well, here we go. First day of my new job. It’s quite exciting to be practising in such a different environment.’

‘It won’t be easy.’ In case she’d missed the point last night, she needed to be warned that there’d be no fancy diagnostic equipment, should be told that second opinions came via the phone or email. At the end of the day the buck stopped with her. There were going to be times when she’d feel very isolated. How she dealt with that would be a test of her mettle. Somehow Ben didn’t think she’d be found wanting. But he was only guessing. Her needlework last night had been fine, but that had a degree of difficulty of one on a scale of one to ten.

‘There’ll probably be moments when I’ll wish I was back in London, but right now I see this as a challenge. It’s all too easy to take everything for granted when you work in a very modern hospital with all the equipment and staff you need available at the push of a button.’

Should he tell her he’d happily discuss any diagnosis problems she might have? Icy bumps lifted the skin on his arms. No way could he do that. Not now, not ever. What was happening to him that he’d even consider such a thing?

‘Ben, Rachel, there you are.’ Lissie bounced into the room, her smile wide, her eyes filled with happiness. ‘Glad you brought Rachel in, Ben. I ran out of time with Jason arguing that he shouldn’t go to school when Harry and Riley didn’t have to.’ Lissie wrapped her arms around the doc in a big hug. Rachel seemed to sink into her friend’s arms as though she needed the comfort.

‘Not a problem,’ he muttered.

Lissie dropped her arms, turning to him. ‘I hear poor Effie was our new doctor’s first patient after her accident last night.’

‘Right.’ Ben watched the ease the women had with one another. A sense of loss, of being on the outside, slammed into him. When had been the last time someone had hugged him? As in an affectionate kind of hug? Far too long ago. Since when had he even needed a damned hug? Right now, as it happened. After last night’s onslaught of emotions over Catrina, he’d ached with need for closeness to someone. Quickly, before he let despair take hold, he dug deep for the strength to haul up the protective barrier he usually kept wrapped around his heart and soul. He didn’t need close friends. He was a stand-alone man these days. Far safer. For them, as well as him.

‘How did you hear about Effie?’ Rachel grinned at the other doctor.

‘Everyone knows everything that goes on in Raro. Don’t forget that if you decide to do something you don’t want found out.’ Lissie grinned back. ‘Colleen has taken Riley for a look at the carp in the pond outside. She’s happy to look after him until Lanette gets here to collect him. Lanette’s running a bit late.’

The doc shrugged and laughed again. ‘So Riley’s not a problem? He can sit in here with me until your sister-in-law turns up.’

‘Colleen will be spoiling him rotten already. She loves kids, and misses her grandkids heaps.’

Ben straightened up from leaning against the wall. ‘I’m off. I can drop Riley at Lanette’s.’

The doc’s mouth tightened. ‘I thought you were on your way to work.’

Didn’t she like him stepping in to help? ‘I go past Lanette’s house.’

‘Okay, then, thanks. I’ll come and find him, explain the change of plan.’ Her mouth eased off the tension.

Lissie asked, ‘Ben, do you know anyone with a reliable car for sale? Rachel’s adamant she needs one, though I keep telling her the buses are fine.’

‘I don’t fancy catching a bus hauling a week’s worth of groceries with me.’ Rachel sighed. ‘Besides, what happens if I get called in during the night? No buses then.’

‘Use my car.’ The offer was out before Ben had thought through the ramifications. ‘Until I find you one to buy.’

‘Won’t you need it?’ the doc asked.

‘Got a work truck.’

Lissie explained, ‘The cops are allowed to use their vehicles to go to and from work, which means they can stop just about anywhere in their own time.’ She looked at her watch. ‘Rachel, you’ve got lots of people waiting to meet you before your first clinic at ten.’

‘Right, I’ll say goodbye to Riley and get started.’

Ben stepped out of the office. Time to put some miles between him and his distracting neighbour. Distracting? An exploding petrol tanker would be a distraction. This woman made much more of an impact. He should never have hung around in her office, but he’d wanted to see her in her working space so he could picture her throughout his day. He had a sense of losing control, of acting like a lovesick puppy around her.

He suspected she’d be a superb obstetrician. Ask him to justify that and he couldn’t, but Rachel had a purposeful air that demanded confidence in her. The women had been talking for weeks now about the new ladies’ doctor coming to the island. One of his colleagues said his wife would’ve gone back to New Zealand to have her baby if the doc hadn’t been appointed. He believed the women were in good hands.

Stepping outside, Ben shook away the old, familiar hospital smells that had taunted him while he’d been inside. Formalin seemed to have a way of getting into everything, even in rooms where it was never used. It had a smell most people disliked but he’d accepted it as part of his life a very long time ago when he’d started his medical training.

He strode away, swearing under his breath. He did not need this. It was all the doc’s fault these once-buried memories were pounding at him again. Why couldn’t Lissie have found her a house to rent further around the island, closer to the hospital? Why did he keep opening his trap and offering to do things for her? Like taking the kid to Lanette’s. That need to help her he’d felt last night would not go away.

Ben headed to the pond and slapped his hands on his hips as he watched the boy leaning over the water, following a large carp swimming around the edge. Beside him the doc was talking softly, her face full of love.

Stay away from the kid, Ben growled to himself as his heart rolled over. Stay away from the doc, he hissed in his mind as his stomach tightened. Then life would return to its uneasy but uneventful pace and he could slip back into obscurity.

Rachel followed Colleen through the hospital, being stopped every few minutes by someone wanting to shake her hand and welcome her to Rarotonga. ‘I’m starting to feel like royalty,’ she quipped to Colleen. ‘I only hope I can remember everyone’s names.’

‘You’ll be fine.’ Colleen stopped at the open door to the maternity ward. ‘At least this should look familiar to you.’

Stepping into the noisy room with windows pushed open to allow in any breeze that might come this way, Rachel paused to assimilate the atmosphere. There was something special about maternity wards. She supposed it was because of the excitement for the new lives. Expectant mums and those who’d already delivered stopped chattering and watched her, their faces open and friendly.

‘Hello, I’m Dr Rachel Simmonds.’

They swarmed her, two young women bringing their newborn babes for her to inspect. Rachel took each in turn to cuddle. Babies—who could resist them?

Then a stunningly beautiful woman approached and spoke in a soft lilt. ‘Hello, I’m Manea, the midwife.’ After giving Rachel a welcoming embrace she said, ‘I’d like to talk to you about one of my patients.’

In the little office off to the side of the ward Rachel listened while Manea explained her patient’s symptoms. ‘Kiriana is having her first baby at age thirty-five, which is very late for an islander. She’s been on the internet reading up about everything that can go wrong. And now she wants a whole battery of tests done that I can’t provide.’

‘This is when I dislike the net intensely. All it achieves is to cause more worry than a pregnant woman should have.’ Rachel read Kiriana’s notes. ‘Everything seems perfectly normal. No anaemia, no hepatitis, blood pressure’s good.’

‘Could you examine her?’ Manea asked. ‘It might settle her down to have a doctor taking her fears seriously. I’m the girl who grew up next door. Not likely to be totally convincing when it comes to persuading her everything’s going well.’

‘Can you arrange an appointment for her? Might as well see her as soon as possible. She hasn’t mentioned amniocentesis?’

‘Down’s syndrome is top of her list for things that can go wrong.’

‘It would be.’ Rachel sighed. People put themselves through untold worry at times. ‘I’ll see her as soon as she can come in.’

They went on to discuss all Manea’s patients but the midwife had no other concerns. ‘Hopefully I won’t be bothering you too often,’ she said as she put the patient notes away in a filing cabinet. ‘But I’m thrilled to have an obstetrician to be able to call on if necessary. I bet the GPs are pleased too.’

‘I haven’t met them yet. I’ll drop into the medical centre some time over the next few days to make myself known.’

Colleen piped up. ‘All sorted. You’re to go on Thursday afternoon.’

Rachel started. ‘Thanks for that.’

Colleen glanced at her watch. ‘Right now you’ve got a patient waiting to see you.’

‘Already?’ They certainly weren’t giving her time to settle in.

‘It’s a straightforward consult. One of the bosses at the airline’s office wants to meet you just in case anything goes wrong with her pregnancy. She’s flying home to Auckland next month, four weeks before her baby is due, but is playing it safe.’ Colleen smiled cautiously. ‘I think you’ll get a lot of that—playing safe. Especially with the Kiwis.’

‘That’s fine. Understandable, I suppose, if they’re used to big, modern hospitals.’ Rachel shrugged away her disappointment. She liked to see a pregnancy through to the end, not be a stopgap measure. But who could blame women who wanted to go home to be with family and friends when they were having a baby?

The day of Riley’s birth was still vivid in her mind. She’d been in awe of the tiny bundle the midwife had handed her. And the stunned expression on Jamie’s face and the unqualified love in his eyes as he’d met his son for the very first time had taken her breath away. There’d been a steady stream of friends and colleagues visiting her and Riley while she’d remained in hospital. And Jamie had hardly left her side until he’d been able to take them home.

So why had Jamie gone and got himself shot? What had possessed him to do something so stupid he’d deprived Riley of his father?

She felt tears welling up in her eyes. Nearly two years later and she still couldn’t fathom Jamie’s actions that day. She was still angry and hurt. Pulling herself together for the people who needed her to be strong, she blindly followed Colleen down the corridor. Bring on the work, the patients, the mind-diverting everyday things that would get her past these moments.

The work would settle her, help ease the pain of the past and, just maybe, make the future a little more appealing than it had been since Jamie’s murder.