Читать книгу The Best Bride - Susan Mallery, Susan Mallery - Страница 13

“And then there was the time the blood bank brought one of those mobile trucks. You know the kind. They stay for a few days and take donations.” Rebecca paused long enough to finish setting the silverware, then looked up and laughed. “He dated both nurses.”

“You’re kidding?” Elizabeth asked. “Both. So much for monogamy, Travis,” she called, glancing back at him over her shoulder.

“I was monogamous. The first one didn’t work out, and her friend wanted to comfort me,” he said from his seat on the floor at the edge of the big dining room. It was one of the few rooms he’d actually bothered to furnish. The rosewood table and hutch had once belonged to his mother. She’d left it behind, along with everything else when she’d left him and his brothers. Their father hadn’t wanted the set. Both Jordan and Kyle lived in apartments. Craig had told him to take it because his three boys would destroy the beautiful pieces in a matter of days.

“Travis, it’s your turn to move,” Mandy said impatiently. “Hurry, ’cuz I’m winning.”

“I’m hurrying,” he told the little girl. He rolled the dice and counted out the squares with his marker. Mandy crowed when he landed on a chute that carried him almost to the bottom of the board. “Guess you’re going to win, huh?”

She nodded vigorously, her blond braids bouncing on her shoulders. She grinned. “Mommy, I’m winning. Come see.”

Elizabeth turned in her chair and looked down at the game. “Very good, sweetie.” She gave him a quick glance. A tiny spot of color stained each cheek, but she didn’t turn away.

Travis was glad. He’d barely had time to recover from his obvious and somewhat painful reaction to their kiss when Rebecca had arrived for dinner. So far he hadn’t had the chance to make sure Elizabeth was all right. He told himself he hadn’t meant to kiss her, but he knew he was lying. He’d been thinking about it ever since her first night here, when he’d briefly touched her lips with his. He’d wanted to know if the heat between them was real or imagined. The still-burning scars reminded him the heat was plenty real. Their kiss had only made him want more.

Which was, he acknowledged, an obvious problem. He didn’t want to get involved with Elizabeth for several reasons. Not only was she a guest in his house, but he knew better than to risk it all with someone like her. She was the kind of woman who believed in commitment and forever. He didn’t know how to do that. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t have what other men had to make something special last. Four generations of failed relationships couldn’t be argued with.

But the kiss had been tempting. He only wished he’d had a chance to ask Elizabeth if everything was okay. But Rebecca and Mandy were in the room. If that wasn’t bad enough, his friend was taking perverse delight in telling Elizabeth a string of stories about his supposed conquests with women.

“What about that trick roper you dated?” Rebecca asked.

Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “A trick roper. I don’t think I want to hear about that one.”

Travis shook his head. “That happened about six years ago. Long before you’d even heard of Glenwood,” he said, turning to Rebecca. “You’re repeating gossip.”

“I know. Isn’t it terrific?” She walked over and patted his shoulder. “I love this guy. He is the ultimate male weapon against women. One look and they go weak in the knees.”

He rolled the dice and moved three places. Mandy rolled and won the game. She laughed with delight, then leaned forward and gave him a big hug. He held her close. Funny how both Abbott women got to him. Elizabeth made him want dangerous things, while Mandy made him feel a fierce need to protect her. And a longing to be more. He would give his soul to be a decent father to some kid. She planted a wet kiss on his cheek. Deep in his chest, he felt a sharp stab of pain piercing his heart.

“You’re the best, Travis,” Mandy said.

“I rest my case.” Rebecca headed for the kitchen.

Mandy scrambled off his lap and followed “Becca,” as she called the other woman. He glanced up at Elizabeth still sitting in her seat watching him.

“I took each of the nurses out once,” he said, wondering why he was defending himself. She wouldn’t believe him. No one ever did. “I don’t think I even kissed the second one good-night.”

“Sure.” She smiled.

“The trick roper was an old friend. I’d known her in college. You know people make up a lot of stories about me and my brothers. They think we get a lot more—” He hesitated, searching for a polite word.

“Action?” she offered helpfully.

“It wouldn’t have been my choice.”

God, she was beautiful. The skinny straps of her rose sundress showed off her tanned shoulders. The long line of her neck made him remember how she’d tasted when he’d kissed her there. Her mouth was perfect, pulling into a wide smile. It was her eyes that always got to him, though. There was a wariness in her expression that seemed out of place. Was it that Sam guy who had made her cautious? What had happened in her life? What was the big secret? Hell, a man could go crazy thinking about it.

He rose to his feet and took the chair next to hers. “A lot of people assume my brothers and I get a lot more action than we do. Part reputation, part circumstances.”

She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her small ear. “Are you trying to make me feel sorry for you?”

“No, I’m trying to make sure we’re still friends.”

“I would think you have so many women in your life that one more wouldn’t matter.”

He leaned close to her, stopping only when their arms brushed. He was pleased that she didn’t move away. “I’m not talking about women in general. I’m talking about you. Friends?”

She glanced at the tablecloth. He couldn’t see her expression, so he sweated it out. He hated that it mattered what she thought.

“I’m not a jerk, Elizabeth. I’m not what everybody says.”

“I know.” She bit her lower lip. “You’re a nice guy.”

He winced.

“You are!”

“Great.”

“You want to shake on it again?”

He’d rather kiss on it, but hey, he would take what he could. Her hand felt small and delicate in his, but it was her smile that just about knocked him from his chair. She grinned up at him then leaned forward.

“So tell me the real story about the trick roper.”

* * *

They had barely sat down to dinner when the doorbell rang. Travis threw his napkin on the table. “I’ll get it,” he said, rising to his feet.

He walked to the front door and pulled it open. He grinned. “Austin, come in.”

Austin Lucas strolled into the hallway and paused. He sniffed the air. “I smell dinner.”

“You hungry? Louise left plenty.”

His friend shrugged. “I wouldn’t say—”

“Travis, who is it?” Rebecca called.

Austin raised his dark eyebrows. “Sorry. I didn’t know you had company.”

“It’s not what you think.” Travis grabbed his friend’s arm and steered him toward the dining room. Austin let himself be pulled along, but Travis knew his heart wasn’t in it. Austin didn’t go out of his way to be sociable.

“Look who I found on the doorstep,” he said. Elizabeth and Mandy both looked up expectantly. Rebecca rose to her feet and smiled, even though she couldn’t see who was behind Travis. He stepped to one side and let Austin precede him into the room.

He raised his arm to Austin’s shoulder, as much to show affection as to keep the other man from bolting. Austin didn’t do crowds.

“Austin Lucas, this is Elizabeth Abbott and her daughter, Mandy. They’re staying here while Elizabeth recovers from a bout with appendicitis. Next to my brothers, Austin is my oldest friend in Glenwood.”

Elizabeth stood up and held out her hand. Travis watched her sharply, waiting for the inevitable reaction. She said hello and smiled at him, but that was it. Interesting, he thought.

“And you’ve already met Rebecca,” he said.

Rebecca nodded several times. “The committee meeting on town support for the home. You were there.” She paused. Her brown eyes widened. “I mean, everyone was there, weren’t they? All the people in the town.” She paused. “Not all of them, of course, but a good many. Not just you.” Color flared on her cheeks. She smiled tightly. “Good to see you. Again. Here, that is.” She reached for her water glass. Her fingers slipped and she knocked it over on the table. “Oh, no. I’ll just—” She motioned helplessly toward the rapidly spreading pool of water. “I’ll get a cloth.”

“I’ll help,” Elizabeth said and followed her into the kitchen.

“What’s gotten into her?” Travis asked no one in particular; then he glanced at his friend.

“Don’t look at me. This is only the second time I’ve met the lady. She was a lot like this at the meeting, too. She must have dropped her pen a hundred times.” He shrugged.

Elizabeth came back alone with a couple of dishcloths. She mopped up the spill. Travis waited, but Rebecca never reappeared.

“Have a seat,” Travis said.

Austin shook his head. “I just came by to tell you that I’ll be here for the football game.”

“Great. But really, there’s plenty of food.”

“You’re having dinner with two beautiful women. I don’t want to get in the way.”

“You wouldn’t be.” Travis meant it. In the past several minutes, Elizabeth hadn’t even given Austin a second glance. Good news because his friend’s reputation with women rivaled that of any of the Haynes brothers. Austin topped Travis by at least three inches. He’d been described as handsome as the devil himself. Between his self-made fortune, his solitary ways and the gold hoop earring Travis and his brothers never tired of teasing him about, he drew women like a shell game drew suckers. So Elizabeth was somehow immune to the infamous Lucas charm. Too bad he couldn’t say the same about Rebecca.

“Mister?”

Travis glanced down and saw Mandy was tugging on the sleeve of Austin’s shirt.

“What?” Austin asked.

“I’m beautiful, too. Mommy said so.”

Austin drew back his head and laughed. “You’re right, Mandy. You are very beautiful. I’m sorry I didn’t include you.”

The little girl dimpled, obviously charmed.

“Tell me, Mr. Lucas, how long have you lived in Glenwood?” Elizabeth asked.

Austin looked at her. “It’s Austin, and I’ve lived here since junior high school.”

She folded her arms over her chest. The action pushed her full breasts up slightly. Travis remembered the feel of them against his chest. His mouth grew dry.

She smiled slowly. With her long hair curling over her almost-bare shoulders and the rose-colored dress outlining her feminine curves, he knew he didn’t have the power to resist what she offered. Fortunately for him, she wasn’t doing any offering. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Elizabeth.

“I was wondering. I’ve heard all these stories about Travis and his women. Are the stories true?”

Austin glanced at him. Devilment twinkled in his pale gray eyes. “Every word, ma’am. Gospel.”

Travis jerked his thumb toward the door. “Get out of here, you traitor.” He followed Austin down the hall toward the front door, all the while accompanied by the sound of Elizabeth’s laughter.

“I’ll get you for this,” he said as Austin got into his car.

“I’m scared.” Austin gave him a salute. “Enjoy the ladies.” He pulled his car door shut and started the engine.

When Travis returned to the dining room, Rebecca had come out of the kitchen.

“Oh, is he gone?” she asked, twisting her hands together. “I hate it when that happens.”

Elizabeth glanced at the other woman. “What exactly happened?”

Rebecca sank into her chair and buried her face in her hands. “I can’t be around that man without turning into a klutz. I have a master’s degree, I got good grades in school. I run the entire child services department for the county.” She looked up at Travis. “I do a good job, don’t I?”

“The best.” He had to fight back a grin.

“Don’t you dare laugh, Travis,” she said. “I’m a pathetic creature. Every time I’m around that man, I fall apart. I drop things.” She grimaced at the tablecloth. “Or spill them. I can’t finish my sentences. I’ve only met him three times, but it’s getting worse.” She sighed. “Maybe I should move.”

Elizabeth giggled. Rebecca turned toward her. “This is not funny.”

“I’m sorry.” Elizabeth bit her lower lip, then burst out laughing. “You have a crush on him.”

“I know. It’s awful.”

Travis reached over and rested his hand on Rebecca’s shoulder. “Be careful, kid. Austin has broken more hearts than my brothers and I put together. He’s not into relationships except for the convenient kind.”

She looked up at him and smiled. She was dressed in a floral print dress that floated around her body. The garment was loose enough not to even hint at curves below. With her long hair, minimal makeup and flat shoes, she looked like everyone’s stereotypical idea of a librarian. Or a Sunday school teacher. The innocence lurking in her gaze had been one of the reasons nothing had happened between them. He didn’t want that on his already-full conscience.

“I know that,” Rebecca said. “There’s just something about him.”

“He’s dangerous.”

“Yeah, kinda like you.”

* * *

He and Rebecca sat on the front porch swing while Elizabeth put Mandy to bed. He could hear the sounds of Mandy’s laughter floating out of the upstairs window. He liked the domesticity of their arrangement. If he couldn’t have the real thing, this was a damn close second best.

“Elizabeth seems very nice,” Rebecca said, pushing off the porch with her foot and causing the swing to rock.

“Uh-huh.”

“That’s what I like best about our friendship,” she said, poking him in the side. “Your articulate statements.”

He didn’t bother responding. Rebecca had something to say, but he wasn’t going to make it any easier for her.

“You’re a fool if you let her get away.”

He didn’t answer.

“I know you probably think it’s too soon to know if she’s the one or not, but you two look right together. She’s bright, funny, great with her daughter and—”

“Shut up.” He softened the words by resting his arm on the back of Rebecca’s shoulders and pulled her next to him.

“But—”

“No, Rebecca. I can’t do this. I’m not a fool if I let her go, I’m a fool if I try again. You’re right. Elizabeth is great. Mandy’s irresistible, but so what? I come from a long line of failures in the relationship department. None of my uncles, or my brothers have been able to make it work. Neither could I.”

“Maybe Julie wasn’t the right one for you.”

“Maybe I should quit trying to be something I’m not.”

She looked up at him. The porch light illuminated her pale skin and the concern in her eyes. She was as slender and fragile as a porcelain figurine, and just as beautiful. He’d held her close, even kissed her once. And felt nothing. Damn. Why did Elizabeth Abbott have to be the one to make him crazy? It would have been easier to try again with Rebecca. He told himself it was because they were friends, but he knew better. It would have been easier with Rebecca because with her he didn’t have as much to lose.

“You don’t have to be like them,” she said, snuggling closer. There was a slight chill in the air. He welcomed the decrease in temperature. Maybe it would cool his desire. “You’re your own person. Blaze a new path. Start a new tradition in the Haynes dynasty.”

“If it looks like a duck and walks like a duck and sounds like a duck, it’s probably a duck. No point in trying to be something else.”

She grinned. “What are you saying?”

He chuckled. “That I’m a duck.”

“Well, go ahead and be one if it makes you happy.”

The ”trouble was it didn’t make him one bit happy. He wanted more. That was the hell of it. He couldn’t be like his father, going from woman to woman. None of his brothers were. They all wanted to make a relationship work and settle down with one woman. Like them, he wanted to get married, have a herd of children and wake up in the same bed for the next fifty years. What right did he have to try for something that was doomed to failure?

“But maybe Julie wasn’t the one for you.”

“She was the perfect wife. A guy couldn’t ask for more.”

“Maybe you didn’t love her.”

Interesting thought. He was beginning to think he didn’t know what love was.

“Travis!”

He stood up when he heard Elizabeth call his name. “Be right back.”

Rebecca rose and stretched. “I’ll come with you. I want to say good-night to Elizabeth and then leave. I have a lot of work tomorrow.”

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. He waited, hoping for some reaction. Some hint of desire. Nothing. Not even the tiniest spark. She could have been his sister.

“Hang in there,” she said.

“I will.” He opened the front door for her to go in first.

Elizabeth watched Rebecca and Travis enter the hallway. They looked good together. Both tall and attractive. Rebecca said something, and Travis laughed. How easily they spent time together. Elizabeth fought down a feeling of envy. After the first year it had never been easy with Sam. He’d been charming, of course, but he’d never let her inside and never shared his feelings. Now, of course, she knew why. But then she’d always wondered what was wrong with her. Why wasn’t she enough to keep her man happy?

Travis looked up at her.

“Mandy wants to say good-night to you,” she said.

“Sure.” He climbed the stairs two at a time and went into Mandy’s room. Rebecca followed more slowly.

Elizabeth wanted to ask what they’d been talking about outside. She’d heard the creak of the swing. It had been an intimate sound. Elizabeth told herself she wasn’t jealous. Why should she be? She wasn’t interested in Travis. At least not romantically. She resisted the impulse to touch her nose to see if it was growing.

Tonight she was going to have to have a long talk with herself. She couldn’t afford to get involved with anyone, and certainly not him. He would sweep her up in passion, muddle her thinking, pleasure her body and then leave her for the next one on the list. Which almost made it easier. If Travis wasn’t such a flirt, she would have a more difficult decision. She would have to face trusting her judgment about a man. She shook her head. Never again. She was done making those kinds of mistakes.

Rebecca reached the landing. “I’m glad we got to spend some time together.”

“Thanks for bringing me the work. I’ll get started on it in the morning.”

“Oh, please take your time.” Rebecca frowned. “I don’t want to be responsible for you not getting better. You don’t have to do any of it if you don’t feel up to it. Her frown turned into a smile. “Heaven knows the paperwork has waited for months now. A couple more weeks isn’t going to matter.”

“I’m desperate for something to do during the day. Between Louise and Travis, I barely have to move around at all. I’m looking forward to getting back to work.”

“Your desk is waiting for you. Rebecca nodded toward Mandy’s room. “Now you take care of yourself and that hunk in there. He needs some looking after.”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “After all the stories I’ve heard, looking after is the one thing he doesn’t need more of.”

Rebecca sobered. “Maybe I shouldn’t have passed on all those stories about Travis. He really is a nice man. Don’t judge him too harshly.”

“I don’t judge him at all. He’s been great to me and Mandy, but he’s not my type.”

“Too bad. He’s not mine, either.” Rebecca stared off in the distance for a moment. “There must be someone brave enough to take on this particular Haynes boy. I haven’t known Travis for all that long, but I know him well enough to know it would be worth the trouble.” She touched Elizabeth’s forearm briefly. “Get better, but don’t push yourself. The piles of paper aren’t going anywhere. Good night.”

She started down the stairs. Elizabeth moved to follow her but Rebecca stopped her with a raised hand.

“I’ll find my own way out. You’d just have to climb the stairs again to tuck in your daughter. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“By.”

Elizabeth watched as her boss left. When the front door closed, she stared at it for several minutes. Rebecca was great. She was looking forward to working for her. It would be nice to have some new friends in her life. Except—

She shook her head and turned toward Mandy’s room. Except for the secrets she had to keep. They made it hard to open up. There was always a barrier between herself and anyone she wanted in her life. She knew she should put it behind her, but she couldn’t. What would Louise and Rebecca think if they knew the truth? Worse, what would Travis think? She didn’t want to even imagine that moment. He would know what a fool she’d been. He would blame her, as she blamed herself, for not figuring it out, for not getting the clues. There must have been hundreds.

Stop thinking about it, she told herself. But it was hard to forget what was keeping her from the life she really wanted. Tonight’s dinner had reminded her how much she liked having people in her life. Being with everyone had taunted her with the vision of what she’d once imagined her life with Sam to be like. She’d thought they would be a family together; she’d been wrong.

Brushing aside the unpleasant thoughts, she moved toward Mandy’s room. As she entered the room she saw Travis sitting on the edge of the bed holding Mandy in his arms. They both had their backs to her.

“Sometimes I miss my daddy,” Mandy said.

“I know, honey,” Travis answered.

Elizabeth felt as if someone had stabbed her in the heart. Mandy had adjusted so well to all the changes that sometimes she allowed herself to forget how this must be upsetting her daughter. Of course she missed her father.

She wanted to go to Mandy and comfort her, but Travis seemed to be doing a fine job. Besides, it was her fault the girl didn’t have a father anymore. She’d been the one to demand Sam sign custody of their child over to her. She clutched the door frame. Sam hadn’t given her any trouble. He’d signed the papers, then passed them to her. His blue eyes had spoken his silent apology as the prison guards had led him away. That quiet apology hadn’t been enough.

Elizabeth knew this was hard on Mandy, but it was better this way. Sam had never really loved either of them. She’d finally figured out it had all been a game to him.

“How come your hugs make me feel better?” Mandy asked, settling back on her bed.

“They’re magic hugs.” Travis bent over and kissed her cheek. When he straightened, he saw Elizabeth standing just inside the room. “Hi. We were discussing her father.”

“I heard,” she said. Elizabeth addressed Mandy. “Were you feeling sad?”

“A little.” Her little girl looked up at her with Sam’s eyes. “Travis gave me a magic hug and I’m better now.”

“Aren’t you lucky.” Elizabeth picked up her stuffed teddy and placed him next to her. “Are you ready to go to sleep?”

Mandy nodded.

“I love you, sweetie.”

“I love you, too, Mommy.”

Elizabeth fussed with the covers for as long as she could, knowing she didn’t want to turn around and face Travis. What must he be thinking about her? Every time they came to some kind of agreement, something was there to remind him about the mysteries in her life. She knew he was curious. She just prayed he would stop asking her questions she couldn’t answer.

Travis was waiting for her in the hallway. Without saying a word, he placed his hand on the small of her back and led her down the stairs. When they reached the foyer she was about to say good-night, but he opened the front door.

“Come outside,” he said. “It’s a beautiful night.”

She hesitated. It would be better for both of them if she went to her room—alone. The two of them sitting in the dark could get into a lot of trouble. Their kiss this afternoon had proved that, and it had still been daylight. But the cool night beckoned. She was tired from her long day, but not in pain.

“I won’t bite,” he promised.

How could she resist him? “If you’re sure,” she said, and stepped out onto the porch.

The light beside the front door cast a soft glow down the steps. The swing was to her left, but she felt that would be tempting fate too much, so she sat on the top step and pulled her full skirt over her knees to her ankles. Travis settled next to her. The night air was full of sounds: crickets, the soft buzz of invisible flying wings, the hoot-hoot of an owl. She inhaled the smells. Damp earth from a brief afternoon shower, the last lingering sweetness of the roses by the porch rail and the hint of woodsmoke from some faraway fireplace.

A quarter moon hung just above the horizon. This was a different sky than she was used to. The lights of Los Angeles washed out most of the stars, but up here she could see the twinkling lights of the constellations.

Travis sat close enough for them to touch. Shoulder to thigh. She should probably pull away, but he was warm and familiar, her only anchor in her new world.

“You want to talk about Mandy’s father?” he asked. He’d lowered his voice, but it still sounded loud in the quiet evening. “I assume you heard what she said.”

“Most of it.” She folded her arms on top of her knees and rested her chin on them. “I can’t.”

“How about your father?”

“What?”

She glanced sideways at him. He smiled at her. In the soft light, he looked like a chiseled statue. His hair and mustache were the color of midnight, his skin a polished bronze. If it wasn’t for the warmth of his arm brushing her and the heat seeping through her dress from hip and thigh, she would have wondered if he was real. She’d escaped her past and had somehow stumbled upon this man. Was fate being kind or playing the most horrible joke on her?

“I’m changing the subject. Tell me about your family. Did you grow up in L.A.?”

“In the area. Near San Bernardino. A small town, a lot like this one. Then I went to the big bad city to go to college.”

“And you’re the only child.”

“Yes. Mom was in her late thirties when I was born, and that was a lot less popular then. I was lonely growing up. I’d always planned on having three or four kids of my own to make up for it, but it didn’t turn out that way.”

“You could have them now.”

“I’m not sure. Being a single mom is hard. I’m not getting married.” Again. She almost said it, but at the last minute held back the word. Still it hung in the night like a winged creature before taking flight and disappearing into the silence. She cleared her throat. “What about you?”

Either he didn’t notice that now she was the one changing the subject, or he was too kind to comment. She had a feeling it was the latter.

“Four boys, an assortment of uncles dropping by to visit. It was noisy.” He shrugged. She felt the rise and fall of his shirt as it brushed against her skin. It was nice. “My dad was sheriff of Glenwood for about twenty-five years.”

“Did you work for him?”

“Yeah.” He chuckled. “For about a minute. He took an early retirement, but there was a month there when I was his newest deputy.” He paused. When he spoke again, his voice was different. “He rode me hard.”

“Did it make you angry?”

He turned to look at her. “Why do you ask?”

“You sounded...” She trailed off. “Bitter, I guess.”

“Maybe I am. Not about the work, that was fine. Dad and his brothers were the original good ol’ boys. They lived hard, drank hard, played hard. By the time I was ten, three of my four uncles were divorced. The fourth one, Bob, never bothered getting married. I knew my dad had a bunch of girlfriends, not to mention a mistress he kept in the next town.” He drew in a deep breath. “This is the seedy side of the Haynes family legend. Sorry. You don’t want to hear this.”

She felt bad that he’d gone through that, but part of her was grateful to have something to focus on other than her own problems. She shifted until she was facing him. Her knees bumped his thighs. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and letting his hands hang loose.

“People in town think it was all good times and parties at our house,” he said at last. “It wasn’t. My folks fought a lot. You can imagine what my mom thought of my dad’s activities.” His mouth twisted into a grim smile. “He was so damn proud of himself. He had four sons and, no matter what else he did, he woke up every morning in his own bed. What a saint.” He drew in a breath. “She split when Kyle was fifteen. Packed her bags and left. Not a word, or a note. We thought about looking for her, but we figured if she wanted to stay in touch, she knew where to find us.”

“How old were you?”

“Twenty-one. It didn’t really bother me. I’d just finished college and was about to find my own place anyway, but it hit Kyle hard. Jordan, too, but he wouldn’t show it.”

Elizabeth’s heart squeezed painfully. Jordan wasn’t the only one who didn’t want to show his pain. Travis might have been older, but she had a feeling his mother’s abandonment had hurt him just as much. She was torn. Part of her couldn’t blame the woman for walking out on Travis’s father, but she didn’t understand how a mother could abandon her sons.

“So you decided to punish all women for what she’d done?” she asked.

“No. It’s not like that. None of us are angry at women. Nobody has figured out how to make it work.” He turned his head and looked at her. She saw the sadness in his eyes. Instinctively she reached out and rested her hand on his forearm. He didn’t acknowledge the comfort, but she didn’t mind. He felt warm and strong, even with all his pain. She liked to think she was giving a little back.

“Craig got married right out of college. Had three boys. But he couldn’t make it work. I tried with Julie. You know what happened there. I come from a long line of ducks.”

“What?”

“If it looks like a duck and walks like a— Never mind. We talked about it, my brothers and I. Watching our dad and the uncles fool around convinced us that we were all going to be faithful to the women in our lives. Wishing isn’t enough, is it? Monogamy doesn’t guarantee success. There’s something else we all just don’t get.”

He stared into the night. Their backgrounds were so different, she thought. Yet here they sat together, facing their personal demons. She was glad that she and Travis could be friends. They needed each other.

“So you stay single forever?” she asked.

“There doesn’t seem to be a choice.”

“What about children?”

He turned on the step, shifting so his back pressed against the railing. He parted his thighs and rested his right foot on the porch, bending his knee. His other foot balanced on the bottom step. Her calves brushed against his inner thigh. It was a very intimate position. Her gaze seemed drawn to his chest, drifting lower to his trousers. She looked away before she reached dangerous territory, but their new positions made her hyperaware of his heat and scent. She clutched her arms to her chest.

“I’d like a family,” he said, seemingly unaware of what he was doing to her. “But it’s not in the cards for me.”

“Too bad. You’re wonderful with Mandy.”

He brushed off her compliment with a flick of his wrist. “Speaking of Mandy, I’ve been thinking. There’s a soccer league for the younger kids. It gives them something to do during football season. The teams are coed, but they match them up by size and skill. Sign-ups are tomorrow. I thought I could take her to the park. What do you think?”

“I think you’re a sheep in wolf’s clothing, Travis Haynes. All this tough talk, but underneath, you’re a sweetie.”

His slow, sexy grin chased the last of the shadows from his eyes. “Tell anyone, and you’re dead meat.”

“Tough guy, you don’t scare me. Soccer will be great for Mandy. Thanks for offering to take her.”

“No problem. I know the coaches. She’ll have fun and make lots of friends.”

She leaned forward. “Travis, you’re wonderful with kids. This is a perfect example. You shouldn’t dismiss that.”

“The truth is, I’m a sprinter. It’s easy to play daddy for a couple of hours, but it makes a big difference when the kids are yours. I know. I’ve seen Craig struggling.”

“You keep saying that you don’t have what it takes, but from everything I’ve seen, all the parts are in working order.”

He raised his dark eyebrows. Instantly her gaze dropped to his crotch and she remembered the feel of his hardness pressing against her. She blushed and looked away. “You know what I meant.”

“I prefer my interpretation of what you said.”

She sank back against the railing. “I think it’s time for me to say good-night.”

“Not so fast.”

He stood on the bottom step and loomed over her. His head moved lower, blocking out the night stars. His hands touched her almost-bare shoulders, making her instantly tremble. But at the last minute, she turned her face away. His mouth grazed her cheek.

“Elizabeth?”

“I can’t,” she whispered. She risked looking up at him. Confusion filled his brown eyes, fighting the fire there and slowly putting it out. She couldn’t. For a thousand sensible reasons that all boiled down to being afraid of making the same mistake again.

If only she’d met Travis seven years ago. If only he’d been the one to steal her heart and seduce her body. But it hadn’t been Travis, it had been Sam. Maybe if Sam had beat her or cheated on her, it would have been easier to get over what happened. But how was she supposed to recover from being a fool? How was she supposed to forget the lies?

Travis stepped back and held out his hand to help her up. She ignored him and rose. A pain jabbed her side as her movements pulled the incision.

“I’m sorry,” she said, looking over his left shoulder. “I can’t do this. I’m not what you think I am.” She smiled sadly, knowing she either had to smile or cry. Already her eyes were burning. She prayed she made it to her room before she gave way.

“So it all comes back to that damn mystery,” he growled. “What is so terrible?”

“Don’t ask me, please. I really appreciate everything you’ve done. I’m very grateful.”

“I don’t want your gratitude.”

She blinked several times, but it didn’t help. One tear rolled free. She brushed it off her cheek. “It’s all I have to give you, Travis. There’s nothing else. Please believe me. I’m not who you think I am.”