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Chapter Two

Crissy tried not to stare at Brandon. This was their first meeting and she didn’t want to come off as scary or creepy. But it was hard to act normal when her heart pounded so hard in her chest she was sure even the neighbors could hear it. Fortunately Brandon was far more interested in his game than an adult visitor he didn’t know.

“I’ll be there in a few minutes,” Josh said. “Go ahead and start without me.”

“Not if I want my team to win,” Brandon said.

“Winning isn’t everything.”

“You always say that, but when we play you get mad if we lose.”

Josh chuckled. “It’s a character flaw. I want better for you.”

Brandon rolled his eyes, but he was grinning. “Uncle Josh, you know you want to play. I’ll let you be quarterback.”

“Bribery, huh?”

Crissy stood silent through their conversation. She tried to focus on Josh, but her gaze kept slipping to the tall, skinny boy pleading for victory. Looking at him was surreal—she could see parts of herself and her family in him. A familiar tilt of the head, a similar smile. She’d never thought about finding bits of herself in Brandon.

She was both delighted by the fact and a little disconcerted. The need to run was just as strong as her desire to know more about him. Talk about a series of complications.

Josh stepped close and put his arm around her. As the steady weight settled on her shoulders, she realized she’d been shaking.

“This is Crissy,” he said. “She’s a friend of mine. Crissy, this is Brandon Daniels.”

“Hi,” she said, doing her best to smile normally. “Nice to meet you.”

“You, too,” Brandon said automatically as his gaze shot back to his uncle. “You brought a girl?”

“It happens.”

“It hasn’t ever.” Brandon was obviously intrigued by the idea. “So she’s like your girlfriend?”

Josh didn’t bring women around? Crissy knew he was close to his family, so did the lack of women mean he didn’t date? He was single—she was sure Abbey had told her that. So why the lack of female companionship? On the surface he was practically perfect—good looking, funny, charming and hey, a doctor. What was there not to like?

“She’s female and a friend,” Josh said easily. “Deal with it.”

Brandon eyed Crissy, then grinned. “Okay.” He moved close and held out his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Crissy shook hands with her son. A thousand emotions flooded her as their skin touched. This boy had been conceived inside of her, had grown in her body. She’d given birth to him and then walked away. They were strangers and yet as intimately connected as two people could be.

Too much, too soon, she thought as her head began to spin.

She turned to Josh. “You should go play. I’ll be fine.”

“All right!” Brandon rushed to the front door. “You heard her. Come on!”

“You sure?” Josh asked as he stepped back. “I don’t want to leave you alone.”

“She’s fine,” Brandon said. “She can find her way to the kitchen where my mom is.” He backed into the house yelling, “It’s the first door on the left.” There was the sound of running feet followed by a faint, “I got Uncle Josh on my team.”

Josh ushered Crissy into the house. They stepped into a messy but comfortable-looking living room.

“If you’re sure,” he began.

“Go.” She pushed him toward the hallway. “Like Brandon said, I can find my way to the kitchen.”

“Okay. But I’ll be back soon.”

He headed down the hallway. Before following and finding the kitchen, Crissy looked at the pictures on the living room walls. There were dozens, all family photos. Baby pictures of Brandon gave way to snapshots of him at four or five with another baby. The infant grew to a pretty little girl. Then a third child joined the mix.

There were formal portraits and candid shots. Some with Abbey and Pete, some without. But wherever Crissy looked, she saw a connection. Did she have a right to step in the middle of this? Despite Abbey’s constant urgings to get to know Brandon, Crissy felt like an outsider who had the ability to destroy this happy family.

“Something I won’t do,” she whispered to herself, making a vow rather than a statement. She was here to get to know her son, but not at the cost of hurting something wonderful. If anything bad started to happen, she would disappear and never be heard from again.

She walked down the hall and found her way into a large, bright kitchen. There were half a dozen women standing around, talking and laughing.

They looked like the clients who came to her gyms. Suburban moms. Normal women with busy lives. Once again Crissy had the sense of them being a part of something and not being sure if she would ever belong. Then Abbey looked up from the cutting board where she’d been slicing strawberries and saw her.

“You made it,” she said, her voice bright with pleasure. “Everyone, this is Crissy. She’s a friend of Josh’s. Crissy, these are my friends. I’m going to go around the room and tell you everyone’s name, but we don’t expect you to remember them the first time out.”

“Oh, yes, we do,” a pretty redhead said with a laugh. “We’ll quiz you later. Failing will mean dire consequences.”

“Don’t frighten her the first day,” a blonde said. “Save that for her second visit. It builds anticipation.”

“Ignore them,” Abbey told her. “They’re actually very nice.”

Crissy sensed that. She tried to put names with faces, but got hopelessly lost. Part of the problem were the comments about her and Josh.

“I always knew that man was too fabulous to stay single long,” one of the women murmured, almost regretfully. “Someone had to catch him eventually.”

A by-product of the cover story, Crissy thought. By being Josh’s friend, people assumed they were dating. Not that she would mind going out with him sometime. Just not now—when there was so much other stuff going on. Still, she accepted the teasing and continued meeting Abbey’s friends.

When everyone had been introduced, Crissy was offered a choice of beverages, including white wine. She chose iced tea.

“Is the game starting?” Abbey asked, looking out the large bay window with a built-in cushioned bench. “Oh, my. Maybe some supervision is in order.”

Several of the women nodded. “Remember last time when Aaron sprained his ankle?” one of them asked. “I swear, the man still thinks he’s seventeen.”

Abbey’s friends drifted toward the back door, then out into the yard. When it was just the two of them, Abbey smiled at her. “I sort of asked everyone to leave us alone for a little while. So you could get comfortable. I hope that’s okay.”

“It’s fine. This is a lot to take in.” Crissy drew in a breath and tried to focus. “You’re being really nice about all this. You could have refused to let me see Brandon.”

“Why?” Abbey asked, looking genuinely confused. “The more family, the better. It’s important for Brandon to know about his biological family. I’m thrilled you want to be here.”

If their situations were reversed, Crissy wasn’t so sure she would be as welcoming. “You’re an amazing woman.”

“Oh, please. I just want what’s best for Brandon. I think your plan to take it slow is a good one for everyone.” She continued slicing strawberries and then dumped them in a bowl. “I got in touch with Marty.”

It took Crissy a second to connect the name with the football player she’d dated in high school. The one who had been her first time and Brandon’s biological father.

“What did he say?” she asked, wondering if he was interested in Brandon as well. That would be fifteen kinds of weird.

“He’s a lawyer in Boston. He was very polite, but told me that part of his life was finished. He’d signed away all rights to his child so if I thought I could get money out of him, I was sorely mistaken.”

Crissy winced. “That can’t have been fun.”

Abbey shrugged. “Some people are like that—thinking everything is about money. He’s moved on. I’m okay with that.”

“He didn’t have such a big stick up his butt when we were dating in high school,” Crissy said. “At least I don’t remember seeing it.”

Abbey grinned. “I’m sure you would have noticed.”

Just then a pretty girl Crissy recognized from the pictures in the living room raced into the kitchen. “Hi, Mom. Can I have juice?”

“Sure.” Abbey crossed to the refrigerator. “Emma, this is Crissy. She’s a friend of Uncle Josh’s.”

The girl was about eight or nine, tall and skinny, with cartoon princesses on her athletic shoes.

“Hi,” Emma said shyly. “Uncle Josh is really nice.”

“Yes, he is,” Crissy said, appreciating how easy he’d made things for her.

Abbey handed her a juice drink and the girl skipped toward the back door.

“You have your hands full,” Crissy said. “I can’t imagine raising three kids.”

“I started with one, so that helped.” She began pulling bowls of salads out of the refrigerator. “We’ve been lucky. All the kids have been great. Hope, the little one, just turned two, but she’s still a sweetie. Right now she’s down for a nap, but when she gets up you’ll see what I mean. She’s a real people person. Brandon is more athletic. A typical boy. Emma is the quiet one. Her idea of a good time is an afternoon spent reading. I love how different they all are, how their personalities grow with them.”

The counter filled up quickly, so Crissy stepped in and took two large bowls from Abbey. She glanced at the contents.

“Did you make all this?”

Abbey shrugged. “Yes. I’m a bit obsessive about what my family eats. I go for organic and healthy whenever I can, which means I do a lot of cooking. We have a big garden on the side of the house. Brandon and Emma both help me with it. I make our bread and things like cookies and cakes. I’m a real homebody.” She glanced at Crissy. “That probably sounds really boring to a successful businesswoman like you.”

“Not at all,” Crissy told her, trying to remember if she’d ever turned on the oven in her kitchen. “I’m not the least bit domestic. I wouldn’t know where to begin. I’ve never baked anything. I can’t even knit and I’ve been taking classes for months.”

“But you’re good at other things,” Abbey said. “The whole work world. I think about getting a job sometimes. Money is tight, with us just living on Pete’s paycheck. It gets worse when we adopt.”

Crissy frowned. “I don’t understand. If you’ve had Hope for the past two years, why would she cost more when you adopt her?”

“The state pays us to be foster parents. When we adopt, that money goes away.” Abbey wrinkled her nose. “Some of my friends tell me to just keep them as foster kids. They’ll still be ours. But Pete and I want to be sure the babies know they belong to us forever and that no one can ever take them away. When you’re all alone, like Hope and Emma were, that’s important.”

“I had no idea,” Crissy murmured. The only things she knew about the foster care and adoption system were what she’d seen on television or the movies. Not many people would be willing to give up steady income the way Abbey and Pete had, just to make a child feel secure. Especially when money was tight.

They lived in a different world, she thought, wondering if she would be willing to make the same kind of sacrifices. She’d always thought of herself as a basically good person, but when faced with Abbey’s generous heart, she wasn’t as sure about her character.

She glanced out the window and saw the football game in midplay. Brandon ran downfield and Josh tossed him the ball. Brandon leaped up into the air and gracefully caught the spinning ball, landed and dashed for the touchdown. As he crossed the goal line—marked by two lounge chairs—he grinned and did a little dance.

Crissy felt herself smile as she watched the boy. He was so happy and together. She liked his easy confidence and the way he threw himself into the game. She’d been that way about sports, too. In her world, there hadn’t been room for second place. There was either a win or disappointment.

“He’s very special,” Abbey said, coming up to stand next to her. “In so many ways. You gave us a great gift when you allowed us to raise him.”

Crissy felt overwhelmed by emotion. “I’m not here to make trouble. I swear.”

“I know,” Abbey told her. “You can stop worrying about that. I trust you to do the right thing for Brandon. You love him.”

Love her son? Crissy had barely been willing to admit he existed. That wasn’t love. Abbey gave her way too much credit. She didn’t deserve this family’s kindness.

“We’ll take it slow,” Abbey continued. “If things go well, you can tell him who you are.”

“I won’t do that without talking to you first.”

“I appreciate that. Don’t worry. Things have a way of working themselves out.”

“You’re too trusting,” Crissy said. “The world isn’t always a nice place.”

“I’m wrong from time to time, but not often. Pete teases me that God looks out for the very young and the very naive. But he loves me anyway. Family is everything for us. We knew from the start we were going to have to adopt. Brandon was our first blessing.”

“You have three blessings now. How many more are there going to be?”

Abbey’s expression turned impish. “I’m hoping for seven, but don’t tell Pete. He always clutches his chest and moans when I hint at four more.”

Seven children? Seven? On purpose?

“I’m with Pete,” Crissy murmured, unable to imagine what life would be like. Chaos, for sure.

“We’ll see,” Abbey said. “If we’re done adding to our family, I’m happy. But if there are a few more kids who need a good home, then we’ll make room. We’ve been lucky. It’s been harder for Josh.”

There was an opening Crissy couldn’t ignore. “In what way?”

“You know he’s a widower, right?”

Crissy shook her head, shocked at the news. “No. I didn’t know. She must have died very young.”

“Too young. Stacey was barely twenty-seven. Cancer. She’d had it as a child and it went into remission.

But she always knew there was a good chance it would come back and it did. She died very quickly, four years ago. Josh was devastated. For a while we wondered if he would make it. But he’s finally getting better. Smiling more. Enjoying life. Dating.”

Crissy tried to take it all in. Josh and Stacey couldn’t have had very long together. She’d never lost anyone close to her and couldn’t imagine how much that would hurt. Talking to him she wouldn’t have guessed he’d been through so much. He was the kind of man who—

She caught Abbey looking at her, a knowing gleam in her eyes. Crissy replayed the conversation. One word stood out. Dating.

“Did you mean me?” she asked and took a step back. “Josh and I aren’t dating. He’s helping me with the whole Brandon thing.”

“He’s smiling,” Abbey told her. “So are you seeing anyone?”

Crissy laughed. “You’re trying to set me up?”

“Why not?”

“Complications. Josh is the last guy I’d want to get involved with.” Their family connection—Brandon—made the situation impossible.

“He’s a great guy,” Abbey said.

“I already guessed that, but no thanks.”

“Don’t you think he’s sexy?”

Involuntarily Crissy felt her attention being pulled to Josh as he ran across the backyard. His body moved with an easy grace and somewhere inside of her body parts sighed in appreciation. “He’s okay.”

“Nothing more?”

“No,” she lied.

“Then I’ll have to find you someone else.”

Great. A matchmaker. “And if I told you I wasn’t interested in romance right now?”

Abbey grinned. “I wouldn’t believe you.”

After dinner, Crissy collected plates and headed for the kitchen. Abbey called out to stop her.

“Crissy, while you’re in the kitchen, would you grab the ice cream for the cupcakes? There are cookie sheets in the freezer with individual scoops in little cups.”

Of course there were, Crissy thought, guessing Abbey took care of every detail.

“No problem,” she said.

“Great. Brandon, honey, would you help Crissy?”

“Sure, Mom.”

Crissy stumbled slightly, caught herself and continued into the house. Apparently Abbey’s need to meddle didn’t stop at romance. It seeped into every corner of life.

Crissy did her best not to panic. In truth, she’d totally avoided having any contact with the boy. She’d watched him play football before dinner and had listened to him chat with his parents’ friends during the meal. She’d been observing rather than participating, wanting to get to know him without him being aware of her.

Now she walked into the kitchen, put the dishes on the table and wondered what she should say. The simple act of starting a conversation seemed impossible. Her brain went blank and her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth.

Okay, she thought frantically. If talking wasn’t going to happen then she should act. She walked to the refrigerator and opened the freezer door. Then frowned.

“There’s no ice cream.”

“It’s in here,” Brandon said and led the way into a large laundry room that held an upright freezer.

He opened the door and she saw cookie sheets covered with cupcake liners, each filled with a perfect scoop of ice cream.

“Oh, my,” Crissy breathed. “Your mom is so together it’s almost scary.”

Brandon chuckled. “She’s into feeding people. She’s always bringing cakes and cookies and stuff to school.”

“That must make you popular.”

“It helps.” He pulled out one of the trays and handed it to her, then took the second one himself.

“I don’t cook much,” she admitted. “My idea of a home-cooked meal is to stop for a salad on the way home.”

Brandon wrinkled his nose. “Girl food,” he muttered.

What? Girl food? “Hey, you don’t get to think less of me because I’m a girl. I saw you running during the game and I could take you.”

He snorted. “Yeah, right.”

She might not know how to talk to a twelve-year-old boy, but she knew exactly how fast she was when she wanted to be.

“Want to put your attitude to the test?”

He glanced at her boots. “You gonna wear those?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I don’t think so. I’m fast.”

“I’m faster.”

Brandon stopped on the porch and looked at her. “If you think you’re so tough, you can play in the next game. It starts right after dessert.”

“You’re on.”

His eyes widened. “For real?”

“Yes, and when you see how good I am, you’ll bow down and apologize.”

He grinned. “Thats not gonna happen.”

Crissy shook her head. “You are so wrong.”

The sun was close to setting, but there were plenty of lights on in Pete’s backyard. Josh collected a beer from a cooler and walked over to one of the lounge chairs by the football game that was just starting. Despite Brandon’s pleading, he’d refused another round. His nephew’s enthusiastic tackle earlier than afternoon had left him bruised and limping.

As he settled down, he saw an unexpected addition to the lineup. His gaze narrowed in on a perfect backside sticking out during the huddle. Crissy? Playing football? He looked down at the ground. In those boots?

It didn’t seem possible, but when they clapped and broke, she headed for the front line. Pete was across from her. She grinned.

“You’re not going to stop me,” she told him.

“That’s what you think.”

Crissy laughed, then turned and watched as the ball was snapped. Seconds later, she was flying down the field.

Pete and Abbey had bought the rambling old house because it had plenty of bedrooms for all the kids they wanted and because the yard was massive. They’d been determined to have the place all the kids in the neighborhood wanted to play. So there was plenty of room for Crissy to sprint downfield.

Despite what had to be three-inch heels on her boots, she moved with a speed that stunned the hell out of him. Brandon, normally the fastest guy on the field, couldn’t keep up.

She suddenly stopped, turned and caught the ball, then raced between the goal line markers. She spiked the ball, then crossed to Brandon.

“You were saying?” she asked.

“You’re totally bad,” the boy breathed. “That was awesome. Even if you’re a girl.”

“So maybe now you’ll stop underestimating what girls can do.”

“I guess.”

He looked stunned. Josh had to admit he was right there with him. He’d known that Crissy owned a couple of gyms and it made sense that she worked out, but he’d never guessed she could play like this. What would she be able to do in athletic shoes?

He told himself he could never go jogging with her. She would leave him gasping in the dust.

The two teams lined up again. This time Pete’s team had the ball. They used a running play. Crissy was right there with Pete as he raced up field with the ball.

She was soon level with him, then she calmly reached over and plucked the ball from his grasp. He was so shocked by her action that he actually let go. Seconds later, she was running back the way she’d come. It was over in an instant. She crossed the goal line again.

Brandon yelled and ran over. They high-fived each other.

“Girls rule,” she said.

“I guess,” Brandon muttered.

Abbey settled in the seat next to Josh’s. “I feel vindicated,” she said. “We need more Crissys in the world.”

“I’m thinking one is all we can handle.”

“You know she’d kick your butt out there.”

“I do, but you don’t have to be so happy about it.”

“Female solidarity.” She leaned back in the chair. “It’s going well.”

He nodded. “Maybe it’s going to work out. You all deserve that.”

“Does the ‘you all’ include Crissy?”

“I’m not sure.”

“You need to trust her. Pete and I do.”

She and Pete had always been dreamers, believing the best in everyone. Josh had offered to act as go-between in this situation mostly to get to know Crissy so he could step in and prevent any trouble. Someone had to watch out for his brother and sister-in-law. But so far, he liked what he saw. Crissy hadn’t tried to push her way into anything. She’d held back and observed. Maybe things would work out.

“She’s not married,” Abbey said.

He groaned. “Get off of me.”

“Why? She’s lovely. You can’t tell me you can look at her and not notice that? She’s so physical and smart. It’s an irresistible combination.”

He grunted because what was there to say? Yes, he’d noticed Crissy. She was all his sister-in-law said, plus sexy enough to make even his dormant body notice. But noticing was a long way from acting.

“You can’t live like a monk forever.”

“I won’t,” he said, even though he had no plans to change his current status.

“She’s right there. Ripe for the taking.”

He turned to Abbey and raised his eyebrows. “Are you serious? Ripe for the taking? Who talks like that?”

“I do. You need a woman.”

This was a conversation he did not want to be having. “So you’re suggesting I use Brandon’s birth mother for sex?”

“You have to start somewhere and she’s family.”

“All the more reason to avoid her. Sleeping with Crissy isn’t a complication any of us need.”

“Fine. Sleep with someone else, I don’t care. But you have to do something. Have you even been with anyone since Stacey died?”

There was no point in answering the question—they both knew the truth.

Josh didn’t know how to explain that he wasn’t interested in being with anyone. He hadn’t been avoiding intimacy—he hadn’t been tempted enough to bother. He had a feeling that part of him had died with his wife.

“I’m not asking you to risk your heart,” Abbey said. “Just give the equipment a test drive. You might like it. You used to like it.”

“I will not discuss my sex life with you.”

“You don’t have a sex life, or any life. That’s my point.” She turned to face him. “Josh, please. It’s been long enough. You can’t stay emotionally buried forever.”

But that’s exactly what he wanted. A life without emotion, without feeling. Because falling in love and then losing Stacey had nearly killed him. He wasn’t willing to risk that again. Not for anyone.

Her Last First Date

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