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Introduction

Living a Truly Abundant Life

“I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

— John 10:10

A few years ago, as part of a professional growth seminar, my husband and other executives at his architectural engineering firm were asked to read Jim Collins’ book Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap and Others Don’t. The book, which was based on extensive research of top companies that made the leap from good to great and sustained that greatness over the long term, had a very positive effect on my husband, and not only on a professional level. There were so many parallels between a company making the efforts and changes to be the best in its field and a Christian trying to live the Gospel faithfully. Take, for example, this quote: “Few people attain great lives, in large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life.”

If you’re reading this book, chances are you have come to realize that a “good” life is simply not enough. As Christians, we’re called to something even better. The Gospel of John tells us what God wants for each and every one of us: not just a “so-so,” mediocre, or even a good life, but a great life, complete with long-lasting joy. This is what will not only satisfy our deepest personal longings but will in turn allow us to make a difference and leave a legacy.

That’s why going beyond Sunday is so important, because deep down, isn’t that what we all want? Even if our faith life is pretty good, why settle for that when we could have a faith life that is great? And this abundance is available to us, if we have the courage to tap into it. When we are truly happy, when the deepest longings of our heart are being addressed, when those big questions that keep cropping up about why we’re here and where we’re going are answered, our direction is clear. We experience true purpose and meaning. True joy and happiness are contagious in a good way. They bubble over into all areas of our lives and send positive ripple effects into our own circles and beyond.

And that’s why I wrote this book. Beyond Sunday is about obtaining true greatness, not in terms of business or worldly success, but from God’s perspective. This is everything. And as I have learned from many years of studying at the school of hard knocks, it’s the only thing.

In 2004, during his World Youth Day address to young people, Pope John Paul II, now a Catholic saint, urged the youth to begin the greatest quest of their lives, imitating a group of Greek people mentioned in the Gospel of John: “So these came to Philip, who was from Bethsaida in Galilee, and said to him, ‘Sir, we wish to see Jesus’” (Jn 12:21). The pope said:

I want you too to imitate those “Greeks” who spoke to Philip, moved by a desire to “see Jesus.” May your search be motivated not simply by intellectual curiosity, though that too is something positive, but be stimulated above all by an inner urge to find the answer to the question about the meaning of your life.… The desire to see Jesus dwells deep in the heart of each man and each woman. My dear young people, allow Jesus to gaze into your eyes so that the desire to see the Light, and to experience the splendor of the Truth, may grow within you.¹

This book is my personal invitation to you to “see Jesus” and the Catholic Church like never before. It is my hope that, reading this book, you will encounter God in a whole new way, not just in the pew on Sunday, but every day of the week. I am so excited about the effort of going beyond Sunday, and all that it has to offer you, that I want to shout from the housetops: “Come on in! The water is not just fine — it’s fantastic!”

Okay, so my enthusiasm might seem a little corny or maybe a little out there, but I just can’t help it. I am so very grateful that someone who made so many mistakes (yes, that would be me) has been given so many second, third, and fourth chances, and I want to show that gratitude by again extending an invitation. It is okay if you don’t feel ready to dive into the pool head first. I get it, and I have been there. Hopefully, though, what you find on the following pages will encourage you to do more than just stick your spiritual toes in the water. It’s my sincere prayer that eventually you will want to immerse yourself as I did, let go of the ladder, and swim. Or, as that old cliché puts it, “Let go and let God.”

We don’t ever have to be afraid of sinking or drowning. That’s because, wherever we’re at in the journey, God loves us — you, me, every one of us, right where we are. He’s the number one lifeguard in the universe.

“I would rather have thirty minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.” — Steel Magnolias

Many years ago, my faith journey left me a bit empty, and I was lost. The world told me that it was all about me, and in particular, as a woman growing up in the 1960s and ’70s and entering the very competitive and extremely demanding career of broadcast news in the early ’80s, that it was all about the career. Nothing else mattered — not family, and certainly not faith. Full speed ahead. Whatever it takes to be successful.

I was raised Catholic and still believed in God, but I really didn’t understand (or, quite frankly, didn’t feel a need to understand) more about him than going to weekly Mass, if that. As the title of this book suggests, I never took my faith “beyond Sunday.” Through lots of ups, downs, twists, turns, and personal challenges that I will share later, this lost sheep finally made her way back.

Eventually, I came to realize I was needing more direction in my life and wanted to go deeper into my faith. Something told me I was missing out, despite my worldly success, and I was looking for more. I wondered how one goes about practically applying faith to everyday activities and decisions while still living a balanced life. What does that really look like? Does it mean walking around in sackcloth and ashes or never meeting friends for happy hour again because you’re spending all of your spare time at the local parish? If any of these scenarios were true, I would be in big trouble. I really enjoy clothes, as well as a good glass of wine and the occasional happy hour. Thankfully, I learned that living my faith with more intention does not necessarily mean giving these things up. In fact, I can honestly say I am having more fun in my life now than I ever did in my days as a nominal Catholic, and I don’t want to keep this all to myself. It’s too amazing. God and his Church have so much to offer.

Early in his pontificate, Pope Francis reminded Catholics that we need not be pickled-pepper Christians. After all, who wants to hang around with a bunch of sour-faced folks? A godly life is one of joy and, yes, that includes plenty of good, clean fun — not to mention, some good vino. Oh, and by the way, I never met a mall I didn’t like. Or a sale that didn’t have my name on it.

I’m really glad you’ve picked up this book. And I hope that once you are done reading it, you’ll pass this information on to others. I am excited that you are joining me on this journey of going beyond Sunday.

A Road Traveled by One Too Many

In his famous poem “The Road Not Taken,” Robert Frost happily tells us that he took the road less traveled. If only that were the case for so many of us who were raised in the Church. While everyone’s particular circumstances are different, over the years I’ve run into so many Catholics who have struggles very much like those I experienced, and I suspect like yours as well. I was baptized into the Faith as an infant and grew up going to Mass with my family. I even attended Catholic school. Yet I didn’t see my faith having much to do with my life after Mass each weekend. At one point in my life, I was one of those Catholics who had fallen away from my faith completely. So, as one who has walked this journey herself, I hope that sharing my story will provide encouragement and hope as you step out in faith.

It’s been said by some Catholic converts that “cradle Catholics” are sitting on a spiritual Fort Knox, and they don’t even know it. This is partly because, for generations, most of the culture shared the same moral values as the Catholic Church, and there was a certain comfort level that came along with that. As Archbishop Allen H. Vigneron of my Archdiocese of Detroit details in his 2017 pastoral letter, Unleash the Gospel, there is not as much urgency in a message when it’s understood that most appreciate and agree with that message. As a result, sadly, “parishes and dioceses slipped almost imperceptibly into a mode of maintenance rather than mission. Many Catholics came to think of evangelization as a special calling, primarily for priests and religious in the foreign missions.”²

The shifts in the culture over the past sixty years have made it clear that we need to revisit our understanding of the Church, of its place in the world, and of our role as Catholic Christians. In other words, many of us in the Church today need what Saint John Paul II referred to as “the new evangelization.” The mission fields aren’t just faraway places where people with a special call to be missionaries can go take care of the poor and spread the Faith. We ourselves need to be evangelized. We need to hear the Good News, especially those of us who have grown up in the Church but have never really gotten past going through the motions.

We live in a high-tech information age, and it might be a bit of an exaggeration, but just about anything and everything you ever wanted to know about the Catholic Church (and Christianity in general) can be found at the click of a mouse. The entire Catechism of the Catholic Church is free and readily accessible online, not to mention countless Catholic ministries, apostolates, Bible studies, papal documents, podcasts, radio shows, books, and personal testimonies. The list of available resources is (and this is not a stretch by any means) pretty much endless. Yet too many of us have no idea these resources even exist. Many are drowned out or overshadowed by everything else that’s out there, from the twenty-four-hour news cycle to social media, pop culture outlets, and anything else that’s got a hold of our time and attention. (By the way, you’ll find some of my favorite Catholic resources in a detailed list in the appendix of this book.)

Let’s take a quick stroll down memory (or history) lane to get a better understanding of just how much cultural norms have changed today from twenty, thirty, or fifty years ago. The so-called sexual revolution that began in the 1960s occurred at the same time that the mass media exploded onto the world stage. This was an explosion of very loud and consistent voices that were, and still are, busy painting Christianity — and especially Catholic Christianity — as backward and oppressive, while touting the values and norms of the sexual revolution as the only true way to freedom and happiness. The sudden prevalence of the “me” culture coupled with the mass media gave the microphones and megaphones to people with a very different message, often directly opposed to the teachings of the Church. And far too often, the Church’s voice got drowned out in an increasingly fast-paced and noisy culture, driven by the media. Meanwhile, the culture itself shifted to one of instant gratification and “it’s whatever I want and feel,” which naturally became more and more hostile to basic Catholic principles. The idea of embracing suffering and picking up your cross daily became a foreign one to many. Living out the virtues as a wholesome Catholic in today’s society has continued to become more and more unpopular. This has caused many to hold back from living out their faith with courage.

Fast forward to today, and we see the fallout. Only about 24 percent of the more than seventy million Americans who still identify as Catholic attend weekly Mass. And for many Mass-going Catholics, that hour each week is basically the only time during the week when they’re hearing about God. Compare that to what they’re hearing on a daily basis from mass media, social media, advertisements, and the culture at large. No wonder it’s difficult for so many of us Catholics today to go beyond Sunday.

Stop and think for a moment about the relationships in your life. You probably have at least a few relatives and friends whom you love deeply and with whom you’re very close. These are committed relationships. You’ve invested, and continue to invest, a great deal of time, sacrifice, and effort because of the love you have for them. These relationships were built over time as you got to know them more intimately.

Now think of the casual acquaintances in your life. You know “of” them through association. You may see them or come in contact with them even somewhat regularly in your comings and goings. But because you are somewhat removed from them, the relationship isn’t very deep or very strong. Maybe it has reduced to just a Christmas card exchange every year.

Finally, think about your relationship with God. He wants us to be his intimate friends, but for many of us God is more like a casual acquaintance. God is our creator and knows us better than anyone else. The concept of bringing God and our faith into our everyday life has rarely been truly explained or, more importantly, made evident by the actions of the people around us. We see God off on the sidelines somewhere and not as a major player in the game called life. And most of us don’t really know what to do to fix that.

That’s where I was many years ago. Looking back, I realize that even though I did not have bad intentions, I found myself relegating faith to one hour per week. I hadn’t left the Church by any means. My husband and I wanted to practice our faith, but we just didn’t really feel like we had the knowledge or the ability to live our faith beyond doing what we know we’re “supposed to”: going to church on Sunday.

For far too many Catholics, faith is mostly defined by Mass attendance. Many Catholics have no real, flesh-and-blood examples of what “beyond Sunday” means or looks like. For the older generation, faith means weekly Mass; for the millennials, baby boomers, and others, faith means Mass attendance on major holidays, if at all.

This book is designed to be a practical and honest look at where we’ve been and where we need to go. I’ve heard from folks around the country — whether at speaking events or among radio followers — that they felt judged or unwelcomed by the Catholics who are very involved at the parish level. They don’t feel “holy” enough or educated enough in the Faith to participate in other activities outside of Mass. They feel like they’re back in high school, being rejected by the “in” crowd. Let me just say, I’m very sorry if you’ve been made to feel that way in any church setting, whether that’s your local parish or a church you have visited in the past. Please know, you have every right to be involved, and it doesn’t matter how much you know about your faith. We’re all always learning more. Your journey is just important as anyone else’s. Don’t let your sense of being unwanted or unworthy keep you from God — the truth is, he does want you. Very, very much.

Hopefully this book will help you start digging a little deeper, no matter where you are in your journey today.

It may surprise you to hear that even if you go to Mass every week and hear the Bible readings, you still might not know the Gospel of Jesus. Being somewhat familiar with someone and having a deep, committed relationship with him or her are two very different things. That was the case with me and my husband growing up Catholic, and it’s not an exaggeration to say it’s the case with a large majority of Catholics, including those who are in the pews regularly. God is the only one who can judge hearts. And God, who created us, understands us better than we understand ourselves. Therefore, he realizes we can’t love him without truly “knowing” him.

Getting to know Jesus and our faith on a personal level actually makes a lot of difference when it comes to true happiness. Yes, God loves us right where we’re at. But as I heard a preacher say once, he also loves us enough not to keep us there. Why settle for a so-so relationship with God, when you can have a great relationship with him that is filled with abundant joy? That’s right, abundant joy, as Jesus reminds us: “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly” (Jn 10:10).

Don’t all of us deserve a chance at an abundant life? That’s what God wants for all of us. It is what he has prepared for each of us by giving us the gift of the Church. He has so much more in store for us. He wants to fulfill the longing rather than leave us scratching our heads, feeling like we’re missing out on something truly wonderful. This is no small task. It takes time, patience, and effort. But it’s so worth it.

As a matter of fact, there is nothing in your life that could ever top an active, living, breathing relationship with the one who created us and knows us better than we know ourselves. Hey, I’m a Catholic talk show host. Would I lie to you? And not just any talk show host: I am a talk show host married to a man who is now a Catholic deacon, believe it or not. I’m a Catholic talk show host who, in her previous life, had everything according to the world’s standards and was still miserable. Both my husband and I are living proof that the journey of faith is so worth it.

This journey could lead you to reinvent yourself, not only spiritually and personally, but even possibly professionally as well. That’s what happened to us. Don’t let that frighten you! God may or may not have something like that in mind for you, and he knows exactly what’s best for you. Just remember that God is not going to abandon you. He has a plan — a plan that is so much better than the one we’ve invented for ourselves. Trust me when I say: Been there, done that, and bought the T-shirt. And while my husband and I absolutely love this re-invention or extreme makeover God did in our lives, we’re most grateful for what he did in our marriage, giving new life to a relationship in near ruins. That’s reason enough to write not only this book but countless others.

This is a book about encouragement and not condemnation. Considering I spent many a year as a dazed and confused nominal Catholic Christian, I am certainly in no position to point fingers. And while this book will take a look back to see what might have gone wrong in the evangelization and catechesis categories, it doesn’t stay stuck in the past, whining about what might have been. Instead, I am hoping this book in some small way will serve as motivation or inspiration to help you take the next step in your own walk of faith.

This book is for Catholic Christians who want to discover the fullness of the Faith and truly make it a part of their daily lives. More than that, it’s for Catholics who want to ensure their lives have deep meaning and who want to help make the world a better place in some way. It’s for Catholics who want to help pass on a living faith to those coming up behind us. And last but not least, it’s for Catholics who are already happily hanging out in the faith pool but realize that there is more to life than floating or coasting along.