Читать книгу Distracting Dad - Terry Essig - Страница 12

With the sound of the clattering bucket, two heads poked into the room. “Wha—oh, uh, Nate, you get your laundry started already?”

Nate righted the bucket, then stood up and looked at his father. “Yeah, Dad, I did. Can I talk to you for a moment?” Nate gestured to the open condo door. “Out in the hallway maybe?”

Ted cleared his throat. “Well now, nothing I’d rather do than have a heart-to-heart with my one and only son, don’t you know. But little Allie here was showing me her bedroom. I gotta tell you, son, it’s a mess. Yes, indeed.” Ted pointed behind him. “I’m afraid our little talk will have to take a back seat. Here, have a look at this.”

Nate shook his head in disparagement. No way was his father getting away with this. “Dad—”

“No, really, come have a look.”

Nate heaved a great sigh and pushed away from the mop and bucket. He could hold his own with the CFO of any major corporation, but with his own father, he was clueless as how to proceed. “Fine, Dad. Let’s see. Show me the mess.”

Allie’s condo appeared to be laid out exactly the same as his own, only reversed. But the décor screamed female in the house. They ought to get one of those decorator magazine editors in here, Nate decided as he reluctantly wound his way through the small foyer, to the efficiency kitchen, and on into the living-dining area and then the bedroom.

Nate took a last look around. Yeah, some editor could do a great series on how the same layout could look totally different with just a few changes in paint and furniture. Nate liked to think of his own place as, well, masculine. Little wonder, as it just so happened his condo was full of what Nate considered manly stuff. Guy choices. Tan carpet, brown leather sofa pit, modern pictures loaded with these really cool geometric shapes in tan, brown and black that didn’t try to be anything other than what they were: cool shapes. There wasn’t a candle in the place, no overburdened silk flower arrangements and definitely no little artsy-fartsy ceramic bowls brimming with stinky potpourri sitting around catching dust, making you sneeze. And pink? What was that? Certainly not a color in Nate’s vocabulary.

Allie’s place couldn’t be more girly girl. Pink might not be the only word in her vocabulary but it was darn close. And knickknacks? Good grief, the woman could open a store. She could stock it for a year out of her living room alone. Nate sniffed in dismissal, turned around and looked up at the bedroom ceiling.

Oh, God. He needed to check his insurance policy. The problem was, he knew he’d taken a high deductible to lower the rates. He hoped to heaven this type of thing was covered, because he suspected he’d exceeded even his exorbitant deductible.

“Holy cow.”

“Yes,” his father agreed. “It’s a mess all right.” He slapped Nate on the back. “Well, we’ve got our work cut out for us, son.”

Nate, his father and Allie watched as a drop of water fell from the stained ceiling and hit the bed with a sodden plop.

Ted scratched his head. “Probably take a while for the water that was already trapped between your floor and her ceiling to work its way through now that we’ve stopped the leak. I hope it doesn’t drip too much longer, though. The carpet’s pretty well saturated already. Know anybody with a wet vac?”

Allie volunteered to ring neighbors’ doorbells while Nate and Ted wrestled the mattress off the bed.

As they struggled to guide their sodden burden through the bedroom doorway, Nate mused that it wasn’t so much the mattress he minded replacing, it was the bed linens themselves. This room too was done in early Easter egg. Come on, pink and yellow and wimpy purple—no, lavender—that was what you called washed-out purple, lavender. Nate decided then and there to just give her the money. She’d have to replace the stuff herself. No way was he going to go into a store and buy pale purple anything. From the looks of things, this Allie woman didn’t have many guys staying over, that was for sure. No guy would sleep in a bed done up like a flower bower. And it smelled…girly in here. Wet, but still girly. Nate sniffed deeply and told himself he didn’t like it.

Ted looked back up to the ceiling as he helped Nate shove the box spring out of the room, and Nate’s eyes followed.

They watched another drop work its way loose from its moorings and do a free fall. Nate winced.

“Hey, look what I’ve got,” Allie called as she appeared in the doorway pushing what appeared to be a giant, lethal-looking vacuum cleaner. “A wet vac. Cool, huh? Mrs. Naderly had one. She said the basement in the house she used to live in before she scaled down to an apartment used to get water. She also has some floor fans to help dry things further after we suck up as much as we can out of the carpet.”

Nate gave her a halfhearted smile. “Great. That’s just really…great.”

Ted slung companionable arms around his son and Allie as though they were the best of buddies. “Tell you what. Let’s handle the carpet as best we can and then while we’re waiting for things to dry up some, why don’t we head to the hardware store? We can pick up what we need to repair the ceiling. If the seams in the drywall start to pop as it dries, we’ll be ready. Get little Allie here taken care of in no time.”

“I really think it might be better if we called in a professional, Ted,” Allie said.

“Dad, since when do you know how to repair plaster?”

“No need to bother some busy construction company when we can take care of this ourselves,” Ted insisted. “They’d never come for something so little, anyway. And how hard can it be?” He gestured toward the ceiling. “It’s not even real plaster, just that drywall stuff. Hell, we’ll go buy a can of that gunk you use, the kind that’s all premixed, and slap some up there. Have the whole thing back to normal in nothing flat. You’ll see.”

“Oh, God. Where have I heard those words before?” Nate asked the heavens.

His father turned on him. “I still say this has nothing to do with anything I did last night. It’s strictly coincidental that your water pipes decided to introduce you to your neighbor the day after I worked on the garbage disposal.”

“Yeah, right. Whatever.”

“It’s true,” Ted insisted.

Nate put his hand up in a “hold it” gesture. “Look, the how is no longer important. The situation exists. Let’s call a plasterer, let him deal with this and I’ll take you both out to dinner. What do you say?”

All Ted had to say was a chiding “Nate—”

Nate turned away from his father while he ground his teeth together. Then he spun back around to face him once more. “Dad, you really need to go back to work. Early retirement was a mistake. You need a life outside of—” Nate gestured up “—making me crazy doing this kind of thing.”

Ted shook a finger at him. “No. No, you’re wrong. All those years I concentrated on my career and for what? I missed my son’s childhood, my wife became a virtual stranger. She pulled all kinds of antics just to be noticed, is my guess. Then when I realized what had happened, arranged things so we could get to know each other again, it was too late. Your mom passed away.” Ted punctuated his words with vehement arm and hand gesticulations. “Well, I’ve learned my lesson and I’m telling you, this is what’s important. My son and the things that affect his happiness. You’re all I’ve got left. You may be a man now, Nate, but I’m still your father. And you know what they say.”

Nate gritted his teeth. “No, Dad, what do they say?”

“Better late than never, that’s what. I may not have always been there for you when you were a kid, but I’ve turned over a new leaf, learned my lesson. You can count on me. I’ll be here for you from now on. That’s a promise you can take to the bank.”

That’s just what Nate was afraid of.

“Now here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll go to the hardware store and then the Sleep Factory. After that, you’ll take Allie and me out to dinner, okay?”

Nate clenched and unclenched his hands several times in frustration. His father really seemed to believe that making him crazy was in reality a way of a father reaching out to his son. How could you argue with a guy for trying to bond with his son? You couldn’t. You’d only lose and look like a heartless jerk in the process. Might as well save some time and cave right then and there. “Okay, Dad, you win,” he said, but he didn’t like it. “Let’s go to the hardware store.”

His father slapped him heartily on the back as Nate gave a last, disgusted look up at Allie’s ceiling. “That’s the spirit, son, that’s the spirit.”

Nate was pretty sure that Allie had called the situation earlier. They should just skip over the screwing-everythingup-royally part and go right to calling in a professional. Save a lot of time, effort and money. He’d seen his dad in action before. It wasn’t a pretty sight. But now, in an attempt to humor his dad, they were going to take a project that would take somebody else a day or two, complicate it, lengthen it and multiply the cost, all by a factor of at least two. Nate sighed to himself. Well, maybe it would work out. If he and his dad hung with Allie for a while, they might meet some of her friends or relatives. An unmarried older female relative with Allie’s spunk might work out real well here.

Nate commandeered the wet vac and extracted a good couple of gallons of water from the carpet while Ted and Allie bagged up her wet sheets, blanket and spread to take to a Laundromat, which had oversize machines that could handle the load, the next day. When Nate felt they’d accomplished as much as possible, he called a time-out. “All right, people, that’s it for a while. It’s getting late and I’m hungry. Let’s head on out of here.” Ted beat them all to the door. Nate assumed he was hungry, too.

Allie grabbed her purse as she passed through the kitchen area. She wasn’t that hungry, but she didn’t want to look at the mess her beautiful condo had become any longer, either. “Your father is such a sweetheart,” she said as she locked up.

Nate rolled his eyes. Sweet. Yeah, right. The old sweetheart had just about demolished Allie’s apartment. What was that all about? A major cavity caused by all that sweetness? “Listen, Allie,” Nate said. “I know this is going to be a big inconvenience for you, but I’ll make it up to you.” Somehow. “Dad means well and he really wants to try to fix things up for you. If you’ll just let him putz around in there for a while before we call in somebody else, someone who actually knows what they’re doing, I swear I’ll make it up to you. I don’t know how, but I will.”

Allie looked at him askance. “You’re being kind of mean-spirited, don’t you think? It’s not like he did it on purpose. It was a mistake. What are you, Mr. Perfect? I mean, maybe you don’t get along with your father, but you still shouldn’t downgrade him like that.”

Nate recoiled. She was attacking him? All he was trying to do was correct an error his father had made. Not Nate’s error, Ted’s. He felt justifiably put-upon. “Of course, it was a mistake. Nobody would do this kind of thing on purpose, and no I’m not perfect. I’m just saying I’ve dealt with my father all my life. You haven’t. I know what to expect here.” Chaos. Bedlam. Further disaster.

“He certainly sounds as if he knows what he’s doing.”

“Yeah, he does, doesn’t he?” And he’d seen his mother weep real tears over some of the repair jobs Ted had done for her. And they hadn’t been tears of gratitude. Nate held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, fine. Not another word. We’re going to get the taping compound right now,” Nate informed her. “And then I guess we’ll see.”

“Yes, I guess we will.” And Allie’s expression stated more clearly than words who she thought would be getting their eyes opened.

“Come on, children, you’re dawdling.”

“Right behind you, Dad.” Nate lowered his voice once more. “Just don’t say I didn’t tell you so.” Nate held up one hand. “Maybe I’ll be proved wrong.” When pigs flew. “I hope I am. Honest, I do. But just in case, here’s how we’ll play it. We’ll let him play around a little bit, you’ll tell him what a great job he did—I hope you’re a good liar—we’ll wait a couple days for him to lose interest and stop checking on it to make sure his repair is holding, which it might, although it’ll look like garbage. Once he’s satisfied, that’s when I’ll call in somebody who actually knows what they’re doing. You know, a professional.” Nate held up one hand, palm out. His index and middle fingers were up, his thumb touching his bent fourth and fifth digits in an old scouting gesture of sincerity. His other hand lay on his chest over his heart. He had all bases covered. “I swear. Trust me.”

Allie glared at him. “You are being such a jerk.”

“I just don’t want you panicking, that’s all.” And she would. Nate grimaced, thinking of some of his father’s home repairs he’d witnessed. Would she ever. “So when the time comes, remember. I promise I’ll take care of it.”

Allie rolled her eyes. “Fine. I’ll remember.”

“What are you doing over there, reciting a boys’ group pledge? Come on, the poor girl’s probably starving to death. Look at her. A good stiff wind would blow her away. Why, she probably eats barely enough to keep body and soul together. I’m thinking we may have to take her under our wings, Nate. See to it she takes care of herself. Seems to me her family’s falling down on the job.”

“Oh brother.” Allie sighed softly. If he only knew. Allie was more than willing to let Ted do any repairs he wanted to attempt so long as they could keep her interfering family out of things. She’d be eighty and her father and brothers would dotter over on canes to smooth life’s little wrinkles for her. She loved them all dearly, but sometimes she felt so…smothered.

Nate opened the car door for Allie, waited for her to climb in, then chuckled as he circled the vehicle. This was great. He’d forewarned her, so Allie couldn’t say she hadn’t known what to expect. Talk about taking lemons and making lemonade. He’d just bought himself a whole bunch of relative peace and quiet while his father was occupied at Allie’s. Hot damn.

Oh sure, he knew what Ted was up to—and it wasn’t only a repair job. Nate was wise to him now, thanks to overhearing his conversation with Allie earlier. But Nate wasn’t worried about falling prey to any matchmaking. He was immune. But think about this. His father would be occupied for several days playing handyman and safely out of his hair. Unfortunately, it was going to cost Nate, at a time when his money should be plowed back into his new business, but the price would be well worth it. Heck, now that he thought about it, he was going to talk to Jared about deducting the repairs as a business expense. An extremely worthwhile business expense.

He drove to the hardware store, well aware of the disparaging glances Allie shot him from where she sat in the passenger seat. Well, good. He didn’t want her to like him. He wasn’t ready for anything permanent and this would keep things simple. He was grateful, yes, he was. If only she had a single mother, a maiden aunt he could recruit to keep Pop busy once the apartment repairs were taken care of, life would be perfect. He was on to his dad, but, heh-heh, he didn’t think his dad was on to him.

Subtlety was lost on a man, Nate told himself as he drove, because men were usually so up-front about everything. But with a woman, a man had to be circumspect, come in the back door, otherwise women tended to get on their high horses and basically go ballistic. Well, no problem. Nate could lead a conversation, bring it around to where he wanted it to go without the other party even being aware. All he had to do was ask a few leading questions, get her talking. He’d find out everything there was to know about Allie and any unmarried female relatives without her being any the wiser.

“So, Allie,” Nate started jovially, “tell us a little about yourself.”

Lord, he wasn’t interested in her, was he? Allie wondered. He was a good-looking guy and everything—really good-looking, to be honest, with his body by Apollo, wavy blond hair and Lake Michigan blue eyes. But she’d gotten vibes from Mr. Parker senior that Nate was having problems getting himself a woman who’d put up with him. And after conversing even briefly with the six-foot-plus Mr. Parker junior, Allie could understand why. Heck, the guy couldn’t be loyal to his own father, talking him down the way he had. Her father made her crazy, too, but she didn’t diss him. Not out loud. Not to a total stranger. She crossed her arms defensively over her chest. She wasn’t interested. Absolutely not. And he didn’t need to know anything about her. “Why do you want to know?”

Nate shrugged. “No reason. Just making conversation, that’s all. You, um, come from a big family?”

“Not really.”

Man, this was like pulling teeth. “Define not really.”

“Brothers, okay? I’ve got three older brothers. They’re great, but they all think I’m still ten. The three of them plus my father would be down here in nothing flat if they catch so much as a whiff of this. They’ll have the repairs done—but to their specifications, not mine—and the entire place remodeled in a day and a half. They don’t understand that I want to do things my way. Your dad at least asked my opinion on color and stuff. He’s great,” she finished, turning to smile at Ted in the back seat.

Nate shrugged. “Ceilings are white and carpet is supposed to be beige. For resale. A Realtor friend of mine told me that.”

See? Just like her brothers. Allie rested her case.

Nate thought about her family description. Was there a problem with producing females in her family? Maybe this wasn’t such a hot idea. Allie MacLord was cute in a Cathy Rigby with red hair gymnast kind of way. Nate assumed a female relative, provided she had some, would also be attractive. The problem, as he saw it, was cute really didn’t stand up well against four large overprotective males who might misinterpret his interest in Allie. He’d go to the wall for the woman he’d eventually marry, of course, take on an entire legion if necessary, but that was years down the road. Years.

Nate tapped his fingers on the steering wheel while he thought about that. A trio of overgrown siblings on one side of the scale, his father on the other. Hmm. He could still be persuaded to take them on if the stakes were right. Like if an elderly maiden aunt could be found among her family members for his father. In fact, this was actually a no-brainer. If push came to shove, he’d take on the brothers and do it with a smile on his face. Nate made the decision to continue the interrogation, see if there was anything worth pursuing.

“How about your parents?” Were they conveniently divorced? Mom need a shoulder to cry on? Hey, it just so happened his dad had broad shoulders, for an older guy. When you thought about it, an interfering family and Allie’s condo’s proximity meant her relatives would be around a lot for his father to bump into. This could be good. Eagerly he awaited her response.

“There’s just Dad,” she reluctantly confided. Her large, gruff, love-you-till-he-smothers-you dad.

“Oh, really? Where’s your mother?”

“She died. Breast cancer.”

Oh, man. Nate winced and braked hard for a changing light, then turned to stare at her. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It was a while ago. I was sixteen.”

Sixteen was a very vulnerable age. Damn.

Nate shot Allie a sideways look as he pulled into the parking lot for the hardware store, his gaze falling automatically to Allie’s face. She still looked vulnerable. Like she was in need of protection. He had a sudden urge to pull over and wrap his arms around her. What, was he crazy? He ought to know better than to fall prey to his father’s matchmaking.

“Nate, where are you planning on parking?” Ted wanted to know. “You’ve driven by three perfectly good spots. I know you’re protective about your car, but do we really have to park at the far end of the lot?”

“What? Oh, sorry, Dad, I got distracted.”

“I keep telling you, this isn’t going to be that bad. We’re both college graduates, aren’t we? We can figure this out. Watch out for the light pole, will you?”

“Oops, sorry.” He swerved, missed the pole in question and could feel a flush rising to stain his cheeks. Somehow that sudden spurt of feeling for Allie had gotten him positively flustered. Damn it, get a grip, Parker, he told him self. You’re acting like you’re fifteen instead of thirty. Like you’ve never seen breasts before.

Nate pulled into a spot and turned off the ignition. He leaned back in the seat for a moment to rein his thoughts in.

“Nate, you coming or what?”

“Yep. Right behind you two.” And he was, he realized, after he got out of the car and locked it. He was also getting a great view of Allie’s gently swaying derriere. She had a perky posterior Nate decided as he watched it swing through the turnstile in the front of the store. Decidedly perky.

“That all right with you, Nate?”

Nate’s eyes rose guiltily from Allie’s butt to the inquiring glance his father was sending back over his shoulder.

“Sure. What?”

Ted sighed. “Is it okay if, after we buy the guck and whatever tools we need to fix the ceiling, we go eat and then hit the mattress store? I’m starved and Allie just admitted she didn’t have time for anything but an apple at lunchtime.”

“No problem. We just have to be sure and replace Allie’s mattress and bedding before the stores close.”

Nate continued to watch Allie interact with his father as he trailed them around the store. She hadn’t hesitated in showing him her vinegary side and yet she was being unfailingly polite and kind to his father. Allie smiled, made small talk and teased Ted. It was almost as though she sensed his father was needy and lonely and was doing her best to be kind.

Nate scowled at their backs. It wasn’t like he hadn’t figured out that much. He was every bit as damned perceptive. Nate just didn’t know how to help his father, that was all. There was no need for him to feel like a worm, though, he told himself. Think about it. Besides, his father was practically glowing in Allie’s presence. If Nate played his cards right, this whole situation could work to his advantage. Pawning his dad off on Allie for a few days would buy him some time to find a few older women to throw in Ted’s path, either from Allie’s family or wherever. That would in turn make his dad happy while keeping him occupied so Nate could get a few things on his own accomplished.

He loved his father dearly.

He’d love him even more with a little distance worked into their relationship.

Let’s face it. He was being a heartless jerk dumping his interfering father on an unsuspecting neighbor, but in a situation like this a little free time to concentrate on things he needed to take care of in his professional and private lives took precedence over fair play. No contest.

When they got to the appropriate section of the store, there was a bit of a debate over what type of guck spreading tools were appropriate. The store was busy, the help already occupied. Nate ended up buying a couple of different ones, picked at random. What did it matter? He was going to have the whole thing redone in a couple of weeks anyway. Let his dad play around however he wanted. He’d make it up to Allie somehow. Nate shot Allie one of his best woman-killer smiles.

She returned a look of suspicion and confusion.

Nate’s eyes widened. Man, he must be losing his touch. Guilt struck again. This really was a rotten thing to do to someone. Now he knew how the high priests felt sacrificing young virgins to the various vindictive gods. You didn’t have to like it, but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. You just had to convince the virgin it was all for the greater good. Nothing to it.

Was Allie MacLord still a virgin?

God, he hoped not. Because in the back of his mind Nate was entertaining some ideas about how he’d like to make it up to her once this mess was over and done with. It wouldn’t be much of a hardship to, well, jump her bones. Nothing with strings attached or anything like that. No, just a mutual enjoyment kind of thing. Provided he could keep the overprotective males in her life and his father out of the picture, of course.

And he absolutely, positively would not feel guilty over letting his father try his hand at the repairs at Allie’s place, even though it would double or triple the repair time. He’d warned her. All was fair in love and war, after all. Nor would he allow himself to feel badly for whatever female relative of Allie’s he managed to lasso. Anyone could see his cause was just. Well, anyone but a woman. They loved being perverse. And half the time it was perversity for perversity’s sake, which made it all the more frustrating.

Men, however, loved nothing better than a challenge. Nate figured he ought to be able to handle any roadblocks his father or a little bit like Allie could put in his way. They had met their match with Nathaniel Edward Parker. You bet they had.

Ignoring Allie’s expression of confusion and his father’s generally random choices from the stock in the drywall aisle, Nate shepherded his little flock of two to a checkout line. Ted made a production of paying, all the while still protesting his innocence. Nate let his dad pay without argument. It was too his fault.

It wasn’t that much longer before Nate had everyone seated at a nearby restaurant. He rubbed his hands together. Life was good and Nate was starved. “So, what’s everyone in the mood for?”

Allie gave him a glance and muttered, “Your head.”

He was going to have to remember to bring earplugs—or a gag—when it came time to jump her bones. “To eat, Allie. To eat.”

Giving the menu a cursory glance, Allie announced, “Salad.”

Nate looked at her doubtfully. “Salad? That’s it? Just…salad?”

“Of course that’s not it,” his father interrupted. “What, does she look like a rabbit? The salad’s just to start.” Ted turned his attention to Allie, patted her hand. “Don’t pay any attention to him, honey. Now what else do you want? Anything on the menu. Nate’s paying. I bought the plastering stuff. Pick the most expensive thing they’ve got if that’s what you want.”

Nate rolled his eyes. “Dad, if she wants salad, she can have salad.” He smiled apologetically at Allie.

“She doesn’t want just salad. It’s not healthy. She needs red meat. Look at her.” Ted gestured with a hand. “Nothing to her. Chicken bones. Why a good breeze would blow her away. Pht” Ted made a flicking hand gesture. “There she goes.”

“You don’t know anything at all about women, do you, Pop?”

“What are you talking about? Of course I know women. I was married to one, wasn’t I?”

“Yeah, and she always complained that you didn’t understand her.”

Ted snorted. “Your mother’s mind was more convoluted than most and you know it.” He aimed a finger at Nate. “Still, I had her pretty much figured out. Most of the time. I just didn’t always agree with her and she’d feel like she had to complain a bit, that’s all.”

Nate looked at his father in amazement. His parents had been champion arguers. Champion. They’d also done a lot of kissing and making up, but still…He shook his head to clear it. “Whatever. The thing is, Dad, women read these female magazines, see, with these advice columns in them, okay? They think it’s a turnoff if us guys see them eating a lot so they eat a bunch before they go out with a man so they’re not that hungry. They don’t want the guy to think they’re not all delicate and feminine.” Nate rubbed a hand over the top of his head. “I know you’ve seen Gone with the Wind. Mom used to watch it several times a year. The ladies loaded up before going to dinner so they wouldn’t look like pigs in front of the men. What the ladies don’t get, however, is that it ticks us off when we take them out to eat and they just pick at their food.” He pointed a finger at Allie. “She probably snacked before we even got to her place.”

“I did not!” Allie was incensed at the accusation. Like she cared what Mr. Nathaniel Parker thought. “I simply don’t happen to be hungry tonight. Just because I don’t eat like a truck driver is no reason—”

Ted patted her hand some more. “Now, now. Don’t let him get you all upset. We’ll just order you a hamburger. You look a little…what do you call it? Anemic, that’s it. We gotta build your blood count up.”

“Mr. Parker, it’s okay. Really. I don’t eat a lot of red meat. It’s not good for you, you know.”

“Ted, remember? We’ll get you chicken, then. Look, here’s a nice blackened chicken breast although I still say red—”

“I promise you there’s nothing wrong with my blood count. I’ve got a lot of Irish in me. That’s why I’m pale. Well, and I’m a little stressed at the moment, too, but it’s mostly my heritage. See my freckles? Irish. And a little Scots.”

Was he good or what? Nate thought.

“Are you folks ready to order?”

“Yes. I’d like the house salad, please. Light Italian dressing. Thank you.”

“Chop some chicken on there for her, will you?” Ted directed. “She needs the protein. We’re trying to build her up a little bit. Maybe some egg, too.”

Allie gave up. “Fine. Put chicken on it. Put an egg on it. Use Geritol for the dressing. That ought to give me a blood count right off the charts and make everybody happy.”

“Uh, I don’t think we have any dressing like that.”

Allie just sighed and put her head in her hands. “Mom, I really think you can do better than this. Honest to God, I really think you could. Put a little heart and soul into it, why don’t you? Try harder, darn it.”

Nate put a hand on Allie’s shoulder, patted her soothingly. It was her first exposure to his father, after all. She was bound to be a bit stressed. “Excuse me? I didn’t catch that. Can you lift your head? You’re mumbling.”

Allie turned her head out of her hands and glared at Nate. “I’m not talking to you.”

“Oh, sorry. Dad, Allie’s talking to you. Pay attention, will you?”

“Not him, either.”

“Not him and not me. Fine. Then you were speaking to…whom?”

She glared harder. “If you must know, I was speaking to my mother. And it was a private conversation.”

Nate cleared his throat. “Your mother? The one who’s—”

“Yes, that’s right. Frankly, I’m very disappointed in the way she’s handling things up there and I just told her so. I’m sorry, but she could do a better job of watching out for me than she’s currently doing. She is a lot nearer to the final seat of authority than I am, after all.”

“Is that so?”

Allie nodded stubbornly. “Yes, that’s so and that’s just what I told her.”

“Uh-huh. Okay, you told your mom off. Did she, um, have anything to say in return?” He held up his hands. “Just wondering.”

“No, she doesn’t talk back. Dead people don’t, as a rule,” Allie explained kindly. “Which doesn’t mean she isn’t listening, though,” Allie stubbornly insisted. She raised her voice a little bit. “And I expect her to get her act together and do a better job.”

“Oookay.” Nate sat back in the booth, eyeing Allie warily. And she’d looked so normal. The waitress returned with their drinks. Nate took his and released the straw from its paper wrapper. He stuck it in his drink and sucked up half the liquid in his glass. So maybe he’d steer clear of Allie all together and forget even the mutually satisfying enjoyment of each other part of the deal. He might have been able to avoid the three brothers. Maybe even handle both fathers as well. But a knows-all, sees-all mother spirit? He didn’t think so. And Nate liked his private life…private.