Читать книгу The Mastery of Success - Thorstein Veblen - Страница 65

Table of Content

Influence in a personal interview - The three great methods - Direct suggestion - Thought waves - The adductive quality of thought - What is suggestion? - The Dual Mind -Hypnotic Suggestion - The Active and Passive functions - The qualities of the two functions - Human sheep - The two brother partners - The Passive brother - The active brother - Their respective traits - The "dead-easy" man - The "hard-as-nails man - How to elude the vigilant partner - Never take No! for an answer, in business or in love - Fortune is feminine - Love laughs at locksmiths - Confidence will win the day.

In this and the next lesson I will endeavor to make plain to you the process whereby an individual exerts and influence over his fellow men, in a personal interview, and interests them in his schemes and plans; enlists their aid and support; secures their patronage; and influences them generally. We all know men who are able to accomplish these results, and yet we content ourselves with wondering about their strange power, without endeavoring to acquire it.

The art of influencing men or women whilst we are in their presence, of necessity includes the other several methods of mental influence mentioned in the preceding lessons, and partakes of the nature of each. It is difficult to speak intelligently of this phase of mental influences, without covering the entire grounds that will be explained in subsequent lessons. I must content myself with a general reference to these several different branches of the subject; as you will meet them later on, at which time I will take them up at greater length. I would suggest that after completing this series of lessons you take up this particular lesson again, and go over it carefully a second time. You will have a much clearer idea of this subject, and many things which now seem more or less vague and unsatisfactory, will appear clear and easily understood.

In influencing men who we meet face to face, we affect them in a number of ways, which may be roughly summed up in three forms, viz.:

1. By direct suggestion through the voice, manner, appearance and eye. This includes not only voluntary suggestions on our part, but also the suggestions made involuntarily by every earnest man.

2. By thought waves directed to the other person by a voluntary effort of our mind.

3. By the adductive quality of thought, resulting from the process of controlled thought, of which I spoke in the preceding lesson. This force, once generated, operates involuntarily and constitutes the most striking phase of what we call Personal Magnetism.

In this lesson I shall confine myself to the first mentioned form of personal influence, and will take up the succeeding forms in subsequent lessons.

It is a most difficult task to give an intelligent comprehensive idea of the subject of Suggestion, in the limited space at my disposal. If the student has acquainted himself with the principles underlying Hypnotism or Hypnotic Suggestion, he will readily understand just what I mean when I say "Suggestion." To those who have not had this advantage, I will say that a suggestion is "an impression, consciously or unconsciously received through any of our senses." We are constantly accepting or rejecting suggestions, the acceptance or rejection depending upon the degree of suggestibility in ourselves, the degree being caused by the development or cultivation of the non-receptive qualities of the mind. We cannot attempt to go deeply into the subject of what is known as the Dual Mind in man, which has been variously designated as the Objective and Subjective minds; the Voluntary and involuntary minds; the Conscious and Subconscious minds, etc. If the student is desirous of acquainting himself fully with this subject, I would suggest that he take up some good work on Hypnotism or Hypnotic Suggestion. There are several good books on this subject, but I would suggest the occult books published by The Library Shelf (known as Series A, B, C, and D), which are courses of instruction in the basic principles of personal magnetism, hypnotism, suggestion and kindred branches of psychic research.

In order that the student may grasp the idea that I wish to convey regarding the use of suggestion as a means of exerting personal influence, I would have him understand that the mind has two general functions, which (following the terms used by me in my other writings) are known as the Active Function and the Passive Function, respectively. The Active function does the voluntary, volitional thinking, and also manifests what we call "will power." It is the function used frequently by the active, energetic, vigorous, wide-awake man, in his busy moments. The Passive function does the instinctive, automatic, and involuntary thinking, exhibiting no "will power" and manifesting on entirely contrary lines from the Active function. The Passive function is a most valuable servant on man, and really performs the greater part of his mental work, doing all the drudgery and fulfilling its allotted task without receiving praise or thanks. It works uncomplainingly, and apparently without any effort, and never seems to tire. The Active function, on the other hand, works only at the promptings of the will, and uses up a greater amount of nervous force than its Passive brother. It does the energetic active work of the mind, and tires after a great deal of effort and cries out for rest. You are conscious of, more or less, the effort when you employ the Active function, but not so when you use the easy going, faithful, good natured Passive function. I think that you will understand the distinctive features of these two functions, from this brief explanation.

Some persons do nearly all their thinking along Passive lines. Such persons find it too much of a task to do their own thinking, and prefer the "ready-made" thought of others, to that of their own production. They are practically human sheep. They are very credulous and will accept almost any statement made to them in an earnest, positive manner. These people are very suggestible and are practically at the mercy of those of a more active mind. They find it hard to say "No," and are inclined to say, "Yes," if it is easier and requires less thinking. Others are not quite so suggestible, and some are scarcely suggestible at all, at times. But the latter, when they relax and give their Active functions a rest, are much more suggestible than at other times.

To enable you to form a mental picture of the two functions, for the purpose of carrying out the instructions given in this course, I will ask you to imagine a pair of twins who are associated as partners in a business enterprise. They look exactly alike, but have very different qualities, and each one is well fitted for the performance of the special duties, which he has undertaken. They share equally in the profits and losses of the business. The Passive brother attends to receiving goods; filling orders; packing goods; keeping the stick in order, etc., while the Active brother financiering; pushing things along, and, in short, is the executive of the concern and its active spirit. When it comes to the buying of goods, however, both brothers take a hand.

The Passive brother is a good-natured, easygoing, "dead-easy" sort of fellow; a plodding, automatic, mechanical sort of man. He is somewhat "set" in his notions, rather superstitious and bigoted, but very credulous and apt to believe almost anything one may tell him, providing the new statement does not directly conflict with some of his preconceived notions. To get a radically new idea into his head it is necessary to "insinuate" it into him, by degrees. He is in the habit of deferring to the opinions of his brother, when the latter is around, and, in his brother's absence, to the opinions of other people. He will be apt to grant you any favor, to give you almost anything you ask, providing you make the request in a firm, confident manner. He is afraid of hurting your feelings by a refusal, and will promise you anything to get rid of you, and to avoid giving you a positive refusal. You can sell him almost anything if his brother is not watching him, if you go about it right. All you have to do is to put on a bold, confident front, and take things for granted. You know the type.

The Active brother, however, is a very different sort of a fellow. He is a suspicious, watchful, wide-awake, "hard as nails" sort of individual. There is no nonsense about him. He finds it necessary to keep a close watch on his Passive brother in order that the interests of the firm do not suffer. The Passive brother is always getting "stuck" by somebody, or on something, and really needs some sort of a guardian, and if the Active fellow happens to take a nap or be too busy with his work to keep an eye on the Passive brother, something is sure to happen to the latter. The Active partner, accordingly, is not inclined to allow you to meet the Passive brother, until he knows you pretty well, or thinks that you have no designs on the easy fellow. He watches you carefully and inquires into your business, and tries to find what you are up to, before he will allow you to see the other partner. If he thinks that you have designs on the easy fellow, he will tell you that his easy brother is out, etc. Even if he allows you to see his brother, he will watch every motion and listen to every word, and in the case he thinks that you are trying to play some sort of a game on the easy man, he will put his foot down on the scheme and call the deal off. He considers every proposition, and accepts it, if reasonable, or rejects it if not. He grows less suspicious when he becomes accustomed to your presence, and may even grow to have considerable confidence in you. He also may be entertained and amused, at which times he relaxes his vigilance and grows less suspicious. If his suspicions are once allayed, you may be able to get in a word with the other brother, in which case you have made a great advance, for the easy brothers, once acquainted with you, will himself contrive to make the next meeting easier. He feels lonesome and chafes under the restraint imposed upon him by his brother, and when he once makes your acquaintance he will be on the lookout for another chance to have a chat with you. The first step is the hardest.

Please remember that the mind of every man or woman is a partnership, composed of functions represented by the two characters with which I have just endeavored to acquaint you. There is a difference however in firms. The Passive partner is pretty much the same in all cases, although in some he manages to have his own way more, and in others he is kept still further in the background, the difference being caused by the degree of positive-ness in the Active partner. There is a great difference in these Active partners. Some of them are splendid examples of prudence, watchfulness and sagacity, whilst others possess these qualities in a lesser degree, and some are nearly as "easy" as their Passive brothers. Some of them can be "bulldozed," others coaxed, others flattered; and others tired out into relaxing their vigilance. Some of them get so interested in something that they do not notice that the visitor is getting well acquainted with the Passive brother, and may even allow him to give an order for goods. Each one has his own peculiarities, his weaknesses. As a man is no stronger that his weakest point, to obvious rule is to find that weakest point and direct the attack right there. You will readily see that the main thing to be accomplished is to elude the vigilance of the Active partner. There are many ways of doing this - the thing to do is to find out the best way. If one way does not work, try another. If you keep at it you will win eventually. "Faint heart never won fair lady." It can be done if it is gone about properly. It is done every day. It is easy with some, and hard with others, but it can be done with all of these watchful partners if you will only keep pecking away at it.

Never take "No" for an answer. Pursue the same plan in business that you would if you were courting the girl you loved. In the latter case, a "No" or two, or a dozen for that matter, would not count. Pursue the same tactics in your business, and you will win the day. Fortune is feminine, you know, and possesses all of the characteristics of the sex.

Suggestions gain force by repletion. A man may reject a proposition when first made, but upon hearing the same thing over and over again, he will come to believe it. No wonder, you believe it yourself from the mere repletion of it, and why shouldn't he. Moreover, a suggestion may produce no apparent effect at the time it is given, but may be like the seed planted in fertile soil, which will have sprouted by the time you come again. By talking properly to the Active partner and getting him interested you have enabled the passive brother, actuated by curiosity (of which he has a full share) to draw near and overhear your conversation. He will often think over the overheard words after you have gone, and the next time you come he will manage to get an interview with you, in spite of his stern brother. "Love laughs at locksmiths," and so does the Passive fellow at his brother - sometimes. You should carry the above mental picture of the two functions of the mind - the Active partner and his Passive brother. With this picture in your mind, you will be able to direct your suggestions to the best advantage, and also to guard yourself against the suggestions of others.

In influencing a man with whom you come in personal contact, you will not have to depend entirely upon the power of suggestion in overcoming the watchfulness of the Active partner of his mind. You will be aided by two powerful allies, i.e., direct thought waves consciously projected by your mind, and by the involuntary adductive qualities of thought. These powers can be highly developed by the exercises, which will be given you during this course of lessons. You will also learn how to acquire characteristics calculated to aid you in making a good impression upon the Active brother, who is apt to be impressed by external appearances.

There is one thing, which you must learn, however, and that is Confidence and a belief in you ability to master this subject. It is like a boy learning to swim. The swimming power is inherent in every boy, but he doesn't believe it. As soon as he believes that he can swim - he swims; but so long as he believes that he "can't"- he cannot. He may improve in the art of swimming by practice, but he had the swimming power in him from the beginning, and all he needed was belief. You can do it, and have but to strike out. You can begin on easy exercises at first, but you must have Confidences from the start. Some men discover this by accident, and do not know the reason for their success. You know the reason, now, and can do as well and better than the man who has stumbled upon the truth.