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CHAPTER 4

“O God, be not far from me:

O my God, make haste for my help.”

(Psalm 71:12, KJV)

God is always with us. He is everywhere, though at times it can seem that he is light-years away. That suffering, that adversity that we are experiencing, that lack of peace that we feel inside – these are the times when we call for God’s help. And when it doesn’t arrive with the speed that matches our urgency, we begin to panic, and jump to conclusions that God isn’t listening or that he does not want to help.

I discuss why God waits – why he does not seem to “make haste” – in my chapter on Psalm 27:14, but I’d like to take this opportunity to talk about feelings of anxiety and panic, and how we can control them. These feelings are the arch-enemies of inner peace, and cause us to imagine such things as God being distant from us. The speed of modern work culture, which causes us to believe that every decision is a life-or-death matter, intensifies our tendency to panic. Sadly, anxiety has now become a standard part of life for millions of people.

Anxiety walks hand-in-hand with its companion, Overthinking. Negative thoughts can enter the mind with incredible stealth, like a thief in the night, and that’s when anxiety and overthinking go to work. The first negative thought that you have will likely set off a chain reaction, and then your brain talks itself into an anxiety attack or a depressed mood. Let’s say that a colleague annoys you at the office; you dwell on this, and it reminds you of that shop assistant who wasn’t very helpful several days ago; then you are thinking about that frustrating situation with your car, the expensive repairs, the unhelpful customer service representative on the phone, the bad conversation you had with a friend a few weeks back . . . and suddenly, you have this rushing river of negative thoughts going on in your head, all because of that one thought that started it.

So how do we stop this? As soon as you recognize a negative thought, take action. A monk once advised me to go straight to focusing on my breathing when I find myself in a state of anxiety. Become conscious of your breathing, and start to take regular breaths: one second in, one second out; two seconds in, two seconds out; and so on, up to five seconds for each. Meanwhile, in your mind, say to yourself, “Breathing in, I am calm; breathing out, I am at peace.” Concentrating on your breathing brings your energy out of the mind; it reconnects you with your body, and thereby brings you back to the present, rather than the future. The future is the realm of anxiety. While your thoughts may stray to the future, never let them dwell in it.

In contrast, breathing is the ultimate “present” activity. You can only breathe in the Present. You cannot expect the past to breathe for you, or the future. So when you want to return to the present, focus on your breathing. It connects you directly to where you are. While the mind can live in the past or future, the body and breathing cannot.

I like to refer to another strategy as, “Don’t open the floodgates.” Think of your thoughts as water in a stream. They are all connected. And as illustrated above, negative thoughts about unrelated subjects like to connect with each other. Your awareness of your thoughts is the dam, or floodgate, preventing those thoughts from taking over your mind and mood. Once you perceive that you have a negative thought, say to yourself quietly but audibly, “Don’t open the floodgates!” When you say this, it reminds your brain of the simple fact that negative thought follows negative thought. The brain then prepares itself for the attack. Then, you must deliberately change what you are thinking about. Don’t stay “on topic.” Think of the happiest, funniest, or most peaceful thing that you can. If the mind is resistant to changing the topic, put on some music, turn on the TV, or go for a walk. Create a diversion. If you cannot distract yourself mentally, distract yourself physically. One way or the other, you have to dam that rushing stream of negativity.

Be mindful of the importance of stopping the floodgates from opening. The enemy loves it when the dam is broken, causing that rushing stream of negative thoughts that ruin your day. Keep telling yourself, “Don’t open the floodgates.” And when the anxiety attack has been repelled, congratulate yourself. These are the small victories that you win each day.

Prayer is also a very effective defense against negative thoughts. These thoughts may have such a hold on us at times that we find it difficult to focus on praying, but one tactic I have used is recording myself reading aloud my favorite Psalm verses (all of which are in this book). I keep this recording on my phone, and simply hit “play” when I find myself encountering anxiety and overthinking. When I hear these soothing verses from the most powerful book of joy and hope ever written, my mind is calmed, and is redirected towards inner peace.