Читать книгу Still Straight - Tony Silva - Страница 11

Identifying as straight may seem like a straightforward description of sexual attractions or practices, but it also indicates relationships to certain people, groups, communities, and institutions. Straight identification in part reflects embeddedness in a straight culture.104 The existence of people, like straight MSM, who identify in ways that challenge the way most people understand sexual identity highlights how culture affects sexual identification. Straight identification, of course, is not purely conscious or voluntary: most societies confer unearned benefits on straight people relative to LGBQ people. Straight people do not experience discrimination, prejudice, or inequality on the basis of their sexuality; LGBQ people do. This fact encourages most people to identify as straight.

There are many straight cultures, although not much research has examined these cultures as cultures, since heterosexuality is considered “normal” in the United States, much like the racial category “white.”105 In contrast, there is a rich literature about minority sexual cultures, especially those involving LGBTQ people.106

Researchers, including Chrys Ingraham, a sociologist in the State University of New York system, and James Joseph Dean, a sociologist at Sonoma State University, do not analyze straight culture, but they do describe social practices associated with heterosexuality that altogether reveal that heterosexuality is more than a sexual preference or identity. Ingraham studied weddings, which she describes as “key organizing rituals” for heterosexuality.107 Heterosexuality is not just an expression of sexuality, she argues, but also a set of social practices and rituals. Dean interviewed straight men and found that many express their straight identity through masculinity, relationships to women, and (often) varying degrees of distance from gay people.108 The men he interviewed did not have sex with other men,109 but their stories show that straight men today are more conscious of their straight identity than men were decades ago.110

One of the only researchers to examine straight culture as a culture is Jane Ward, a sociologist at the University of California–Riverside, who examined straight white MSM in urban or military contexts. Ward did not interview any men or analyze survey data. Instead, she did a content analysis of cultural materials such as Craigslist ads, popular films, and military rituals. From these analyses, she argues that same-sex sexual or erotic contact is a fundamental element of white heterosexual masculinity: “Homosexuality is an often invisible, but nonetheless vital ingredient—a constitutive element—of heterosexual masculinity.”111 I do not make this argument, since I have a different focus. Instead, I analyze how straight MSM construct their sense of themselves as masculine and straight, despite the fact that they have sex with men.

My argument following from this is that the men I interviewed help to show what straight culture is and how many men come to identify with it. Most straight men do not have sex with other men, but those who do help highlight how heterosexuality is more than a set of attractions or sexual practices.

Distinct straight cultures have many similarities and share considerable overlap. They vary from one another somewhat, but all are similar enough to be understood as part of the concept that falls under the umbrella of “straight culture.” Most of these cultures encourage heterosexual identification, believe that men and women are “opposites” of one another, and normalize gender inequalities, in different ways and to varying extents. Similarities and differences can be recognized via cross-national research. For instance, the United States and the Netherlands, examined at the national level, have distinct straight cultures, as Amy Schalet, a sociologist at the University of Massachusetts–Amherst, has shown with her cross-cultural snapshot examining approaches to teenage sexuality in the two countries.112 She finds that Americans tend to view teenage sexuality as dangerous and something that needs to be controlled, whereas many parents in the Netherlands support teenage sexual education and responsible sexual exploration.

A second example is the work of Gloria González-López, a sociologist at the University of Texas–Austin, who documented the sexual and romantic lives of straight Mexicans who immigrated to the United States.113 Migration brought the people she interviewed to new social, economic, and political contexts, and interacting with new people exposed them to new attitudes toward sexuality and gender. International travel or migration can put individuals in contact with new straight cultures; this exposure can change how individuals experience their sexuality.

There are also distinct straight cultures within countries, including the United States. American evangelical Christians, for instance, have a distinct sexual culture that emphasizes heterosexuality, marriage, and sex for the purpose of procreating or maintaining fulfilling marriages.114 This is in contrast to more liberal and secular straight cultures like those on many college campuses that normalize men and women hooking up.115

Regardless of the distinctions between straight cultures, however, a feature that ties most together is treating people as if they are either male or female, man or woman, when the world is much more complicated. Biologically, there are not just males and females; there are many individuals who are intersex and have characteristics of both males and females.116 There are many different types of intersex conditions based on hormones, genitalia, and chromosomes.

Socially, there are a variety of ways that people express their gender that are neither hypermasculine nor hyperfeminine.117 Most people express masculine and feminine characteristics, but to varying degrees. While some people are much more masculine or feminine than others, most people have a mix of traits. There are also many people who identify as genderqueer or nonbinary: neither man nor woman. While there is extensive gender diversity, treatment of people as either men or women persists.

For instance, institutions have responded to transgender people in ways that reinforce binary ideas about gender as well as sexuality. In gender-integrated settings, identity is often sufficient for the inclusion of transgender people, but in gender-segregated spaces, like bathrooms or sports competitions, biological markers are more important.118 This is the case in part due to a cultural belief that men and women are biological opposites, as well as a belief that people with penises—however they identify—are basically heterosexual men who may prey on women and children.119 One example of this is social panic over transgender women’s use of public restrooms.120 Increasing visibility of transgender and nonbinary people has modified how people understand gender, but not enough to fully change the fact that gender is usually understood as binary.

In short, while there is diversity when it comes to both biological sex and gender identity and expression (as masculine or feminine), in most straight cultures sex and gender are generally treated as binary. Beliefs about people belonging to one of only two “opposite” gender categories undergird how institutions and communities operate, as well as how individuals interact with one another.121

A colorful example of how this binarism is deeply ingrained in straight culture relates to so-called gender reveal parties for expectant mothers,122 a recent but increasingly popular phenomenon, one fueled significantly by the explosion of social media. While these babies may be either male or female (or intersex), they have not yet begun to express gender, given that they are not yet even born. Yet gender reveal parties show that people assume a baby will behave in masculine or feminine ways simply on the basis of that baby’s genitals. Many parents take these events very seriously. In 2017, one expectant father at a gender reveal party in Arizona shot a target designed to explode upon impact, and this accidentally caused a wildfire that scorched tens of thousands of acres of land.123

Parents celebrate what they believe their baby will be like on the basis of their sex, yet neuroscience research shows that gender socialization affects brain development in ways that create gender differences.124 Toys marketed to boys and girls, for example, help create different kinds of skills. Many boys become somewhat more skilled at spatial tasks, for instance, because they are encouraged to play with toys and engage in activities that teach them these skills, whereas girls generally are not. Gender imbalances in occupations like technology and teaching exist not because of innate sex/gender differences but because men and women are socialized to be more interested in certain skills and occupations than others (and also due to discrimination against women).

While there are some differences between males and females, most of these differences on their own do not greatly shape people’s lives. When outcomes on any given criteria like test scores, mathematical ability,125 and so on are charted, the distribution for males and females considerably overlap; there are generally not major differences between them. Further, society emphasizes gender differences (real or imagined, biological or social) rather than the many similarities between the sexes and genders. So, while there are some biological differences among the sexes, there are fairly few, and many of those related to brain structure are actually a product of whether a person is socialized as a man or a woman. Most gender differences are created by society.

Categorization of people as one of two “opposite” genders is important to straight culture because it is the foundation of “heterosexuality” as a concept: if there are more than two sexes or genders, then the assumption that heterosexuality is attraction to the “opposite” sex or gender is incorrect. Obviously, men and women have had sex with one another throughout history and will continue to do so. This is different from heterosexuality as a concept, however, because “heterosexuality” presumes that there are only two, completely different and complementary sexes and genders, which is not true.

In addition to categorizing people as one of two opposite genders, most straight cultures uphold inequalities between men and women in most areas of social life. For instance, women’s sexual needs are often considered less important than men’s, consciously or not. This is why men are more likely to orgasm during sexual encounters than their women sexual partners,126 even though women are usually capable of more orgasms per encounter than men. The orgasm gap is due in part to how men are often not interested in better pleasing their woman partner,127 and because women are taught to put men’s needs before their own and to gain self-esteem through men’s approval.128 Relatedly, a sexual double standard stigmatizes women who hook up, but not men.129 In the medical field, more attention is paid to men’s sexual frustration than women’s sexual pain: four times as many women than men experience pain during vaginal sex,130 yet there are many more studies on how to address erectile dysfunction.131

Men are much more likely to sexually assault women than vice versa,132 as well as to commit sexual harassment.133 Men are also usually not punished for sexual harassment, legally or otherwise.134 Indeed, Senate Republicans enthusiastically supported fellow Republican judge Clarence Thomas in 1991 and, more recently, Brett Kavanaugh in 2018 for lifetime appointments to the US Supreme Court, which routinely makes decisions about how much control women should be able to have over their own bodies. They did so even though multiple women credibly accused both of sexual harassment or attempted rape. One poll found that 55 percent of registered Republicans felt that Kavanaugh should not be disqualified even if allegations against him were true, whereas 71 percent of Democrats felt that he should be disqualified.135 Similarly, despite President Trump boasting in 2005 that he sexually assaulted women (“grab ’em by the pussy”), not to mention the multiple women who publicly accused him of sexual harassment, groping, or rape,136 most Republican voters chose him to shape laws and policies that will affect women for decades. Harassment and violence against a woman by a man is often normalized, especially when the man is wealthy, powerful, or well connected.

Even with consensual sex, however, most women are at a disadvantage relative to men, for many reasons. Inequalities between women and men are usually denied, ignored, blamed on women, or explained as biological. Yet research shows that even our understandings of biology are incorrect. For instance, most people are taught that active sperm race to inseminate a passive egg,137 in line with understandings of men as masculine and women as feminine, even though the woman’s body is just as active in insemination.138 Other ideas about how women and men behave differently during courtship, sex, and reproduction are greatly affected by social context.139 Gender inequality in straight cultures is present outside of the realm of sexuality, too, and structures most aspects of social life.140

In sum, straight cultures reinforce gender inequality between women and men in a variety of ways. Even though there is a huge literature on gender inequality, few researchers have analyzed how this issue is a key part of straight culture. This lack of data reflects how many people take heterosexuality for granted and do not consider how gender inequality or social practices of straight people are related to a straight culture. While I do not explore gender inequality at length in this book, it is important to keep in mind that it is a fundamental aspect of most straight cultures.

Another similarity between straight cultures is that they encourage straight identification. Part of this encouragement is achieved through homophobia and biphobia (as described earlier), and part of it is enacted through childhood socialization in both overt and subtle ways. For instance, most children’s films portray heterosexuality as natural and desirable.141 Parents also usually raise their children to be straight, in part by rarely discussing alternatives to heterosexuality.142 In schools, most educational curricula and interactions between teachers, staff, and students socialize boys to be masculine, girls to be feminine, and all children to be heterosexual, with subtle socialization beginning even in preschool.143 Similarly, peer interactions in elementary school144 through high school145 regulate how boys and girls express their sexuality and gender. In both obvious and subtle ways, most institutions and groups that are part of straight culture socialize children to become straight.

I introduce “straight culture” as a framework for analysis because it brings together different literatures in the sociological study of sexuality and gender. “Straight culture,” I argue, is a concept that synthesizes different literatures and is an analytical framework that best captures my main findings. “Straight culture” is not simply a theoretical concept analyzing links between gender and sexuality. It is a framework for understanding social life that builds on past research and that I support with empirical data.

Obviously, not all straight people are homophobic, endorse gender inequality, or ignore the existence of more than two genders. Many straight people are genuinely committed to equal rights for people of all sexualities and genders. What I analyze when I use the term “straight culture” are social patterns that exist because of institutions, communities, and social norms that together perpetuate heteronormativity (the assumption that everyone is heterosexual) and gender inequality, even despite progressive individual straight people.

“Straight culture” is an umbrella concept that includes many different types of straight cultures, which overlap considerably but also have some unique differences based on how individuals in particular areas and with certain social identities perpetuate social norms about gender and sexuality. For instance, while most areas across America are home to a type of straight culture, specifics of this culture differ: marriage rates in urban areas are lower than in rural areas and small towns, for instance, showing that the institution of marriage is more central to rural and small-town straight culture.146

In this book, I analyze straight culture in parts of rural and small-town America in which the majority of the people are white. While I analyze this culture specifically, the findings also have implications for straight cultures in other areas and other populations, given that there is so much overlap between these cultures. “Straight culture” is an umbrella concept that encompasses specific straight cultures, and the rural and small-town, white-majority straight culture I describe is one of them. This culture shares extensive overlap with other straight cultures but is also recognizably distinct.

By analyzing straight culture as a culture, this book shines a spotlight on an underexamined organizing framework for social life. It synthesizes prior research about gender and sexuality, including gender inequality and homophobia, as well as the findings I documented, in a way that comprehensively describes them and explores their connections. This project is not a story of closeted gay or bisexual men, nor is it a look at a straight culture disconnected from broader American society. Its findings are not empirically representative, but they do have implications for better understanding straight culture(s) more broadly. Notably, they provide more detail for patterns researchers have found with nationally representative surveys. As we shall see, this research shows that some men have sex with other men yet still identify as straight. The stories they tell give us insight into how many men understand themselves as straight and masculine.