Читать книгу The Forget-Me-Not Flower Shop - Tracy Corbett - Страница 15

It took all of Scott’s control not to tear the Personal Independence Payment application into a thousand pieces. Instead, he took a deep breath and re-read the question about ‘descriptors’. Each mobility activity had a score depending on the claimant’s ability to carry out that activity. The list included preparing food, dressing and undressing, washing and bathing. And his particular favourite, planning and following journeys. His mother was in a wheelchair, for God’s sake, paralysed down one side. Of course she couldn’t bleeding navigate a journey.

He got up and fetched a beer from the fridge, hoping to calm his frustrations. Whatever his objections to the government’s claiming process, he was forced to persist, because they needed the money. However much he hated it.

Taking a swig from the bottle, he returned to the form and read his last entry. He’d managed to write not only his Ns backwards but his Bs too. Great. The form looked like it had been filled in by a five-year-old.

Picking up the eraser, he amended his mistakes, channelling his humiliation into frantic rubbing. In his work life he’d learnt to control his environment, avoiding writing anything down, preferring to take his time over reading and writing in private. He’d also discovered the benefits of using a computer and spellcheck. Unfortunately, this particular form wasn’t available electronically, so he was stuck filling it in manually.

He was distracted from his annoyance by the sound of Ben returning from his latest date with Amy. The kid had been quieter than normal all week, ever since his ‘big date’ last Monday, leading Scott to the conclusion that all had not gone well. But the bubble of activity radiating from the lounge indicated a change in his nephew’s mood. He went to investigate.

He found Ben kneeling in front of Billie, his face lit up like he’d won a Golden Globe. He jumped to his feet when Scott walked in, tossing his baseball cap in the air. ‘She said yes, Uncle Scott!’

Feeling like he’d missed the opening scenes of a film, Scott responded with, ‘Who did?’

‘Amy.’ Ben bounced over, seemingly oblivious to his uncle’s puzzlement. ‘I asked her last week, but she needed time to think it over. Tonight she finally said yes.’

A sense of dread settled in Scott’s stomach. ‘Said yes to what, exactly?’ He seriously hoped his intuition was wrong.

Ben danced about, all arms and legs, like a drunken Bambi. ‘We’re getting married!’

Oh, hell. Scott became aware of a buzzing sound in his brain, alarm bells ringing, sirens blaring, but he was struck motionless by the shock.

Ben’s enthusiasm hadn’t wavered. ‘Isn’t it great?’

Scott tried for a response, but his brain refused to process the information.

‘Uncle Scott? It’s great news, right?’ Ben’s expression remained elated as he searched Scott’s face, looking for affirmation of his big announcement.

But Scott was far from thrilled. This wasn’t good news. This was a catastrophe. He looked at Billie, hoping his mum shared his reaction. She gave nothing away. Her face was its usual relaxed state, even though there appeared to be tears in her eyes. Good tears or bad, he couldn’t tell.

Ben tried again to force a response from his mute uncle. ‘You’re pleased, aren’t you?’

Scott wasn’t sure what he was, but he was pretty certain ‘pleased’ didn’t describe it. His instinct was to grab the kid and shout that it was a ridiculous idea, but he knew reacting in such a way would only strengthen the kid’s defences. He opted for a more muted response. ‘Surprise would better describe it. I had no idea this was on the cards.’

‘I’ve wanted to marry Amy from the moment we met.’ Ben’s face glowed with adoration.

‘You met at primary school.’ Scott tried not to sound patronising.

Ben bristled. ‘That’s when I knew. It was love at first sight. She’s the only girl for me. The person I want to spend the rest of my life with. She feels the same way.’

Scott chose his next words carefully. ‘I’m sure she does, but how you feel now might not be how you feel in five or ten years’ time.’

Ben looked disappointed. ‘I thought you of all people would understand.’

Nice dig. ‘Why, because I got engaged at a young age?’

Ben didn’t respond.

Scott tried again. ‘That only serves to prove my point. I was smitten, just as you are, sure of what I wanted. But look how things turned out.’ He tried not to look at his mum. He suspected she knew why Nicole had ended things, but he hoped not. Maybe it was wishful thinking on his part, but he didn’t want to lay more guilt onto everything else she had to deal with.

Ben looked defiant. ‘That won’t happen to us.’

Just what he’d said when his mates had commented on his decision to get engaged at twenty-five. ‘How can you be so sure?’

‘Because I’m an optimist. I believe in love. I believe in Amy. We’re good together. We have the same ideals, the same outlook. This is the real deal.’

Christ, the kid was even more of a hopeless romantic than he’d been. ‘I’m not for a moment saying it’s not. But if this is true love, then what’s the rush? Why not wait until you’re a few years older, just to be certain?’

Ben moved away. ‘Because we don’t want to. We have everything planned out.’ He settled next to Billie, allying himself with someone less averse to his announcement. Or at least someone less able to challenge his decision.

Scott’s mind raced for something to say, an objection that would hit home. Even though he’d taken over Ben’s care responsibilities, he’d never felt equipped to fulfil the fatherly role. He was only eleven years older than Ben, so their relationship was more along the lines of brotherly love. ‘What about film school? I thought you were set on becoming a director?’

Ben shrugged. ‘This doesn’t change that. We’re both going to take a gap year so we can travel and then go to uni next year.’

The kid had an answer for everything. It shouldn’t be Scott dealing with this, it should be Lisa, or Billie. Anyone but him. He wasn’t up to it. But thanks to bad fortune, neither was Billie, her communication skills reduced to one-word slurs. He glanced at her, hoping to see the same concern in her eyes as he had, but she was smiling, patting Ben’s hand with her good arm. Thanks, Mum. Really helpful.

Scott only had one card left to play. ‘Have you spoken to your mum about this?’

Ben’s expression hardened. ‘No, I haven’t spoken to Lisa and I don’t intend to. This has nothing to do with her.’

His nephew’s response wasn’t a shock, even if it was disappointing. ‘She’s your mum. Of course this affects her.’

Ben laughed. ‘Yeah, right. I haven’t seen the woman for two years. Our relationship has reduced to Christmas and birthday cards. We can stop pretending Lisa cares about me, because she doesn’t.’ He held onto his nan’s hand. ‘She doesn’t care about anyone other than herself.’

Scott wanted to dispute that fact, but how could he? When it came to applied and interdisciplinary mathematics, his sister cared deeply. Her whole existence was devoted to developing a highly successful career. But when it came to parenting her ‘mistake’, as she referred to it, she was as lacking in as many skills as Scott was in completing benefit forms.

Trouble was, it wasn’t entirely Lisa’s fault. At sixteen she hadn’t been equipped to care for a baby. Scott’s mum had taken over the main responsibilities and sent Lisa off to school, encouraging her studies, not wanting her daughter to be held back by having a kid so young.

Consequently, as Ben and Billie’s bond grew stronger, Lisa was pushed to the sidelines. When Ben cried it was Billie who comforted him. When he fell over it was his nan he wanted to nurse him better. Unintentionally, Lisa was relegated to the position of spectator in her son’s life. By the time Ben reached eleven the wedge between them was cemented. A job opportunity abroad offered Lisa the career she’d always wanted and an escape from the constant disappointment of not being the most important person in her son’s life.

Scott tried again. ‘I’m not going to defend your mum’s decision not to visit more. I agree it’s lousy. But there’s no question she loves you.’

Ben shook his head. ‘Love is not buggering off to Bangalore and leaving behind your eleven-year-old kid.’ He stood up. ‘Apart from Amy, the only people’s opinions I care about are in this room. You’re my family, you and Nanny. As long as you’re behind me then I don’t care about what anyone else thinks.’ He walked over to Scott. ‘I can tell Nan’s okay with it. That just leaves you. Are you going to support me, Uncle Scott? Or abandon me like Lisa did?’

Scott flinched. It was a low blow, an unfair ultimatum, but Scott knew if he didn’t side with Ben it would be irreversible. ‘Abandoning you is something I would never do. And if you don’t know that by now then I’m sorry for not making it clearer.’

Ben’s challenging gaze softened.

Scott knew he was losing ground. ‘Would I prefer it if you waited until you were older? Yes. Would I be happier if you finished uni and fulfilled your dream to be a director before taking on the challenges of a family? Definitely. But if you’re determined to do this, then of course I’ll support you. We both will.’ He looked at his mum. She nodded her consent.

Ben threw himself at Scott. ‘Thank you.’

Scott kept eye contact with his mum, trying to read her expression. She nodded slowly, as if to say, ‘You’re doing the right thing.’ He wasn’t so sure.

Ben’s joyful exuberance was quickly restored. Within minutes he’d downloaded Slumdog Millionaire onto the TV and was curled up next to Billie, making her laugh with his off-key rendition of ‘Jai Ho’.

Leaving them to it, Scott went into the kitchen. He was no longer in the mood for tackling the PIP form, not after Ben’s bombshell. He finished his beer and went into his bedroom to phone Lisa. It felt like a betrayal, but Ben’s mother needed to know her son was planning to marry.

The estrangement between mother and son might not totally be down to his sister, but Lisa compounded the problem by not coming home more often. Countless times, Scott had pointed out that their relationship couldn’t improve with her living so far away, but his sister was convinced Ben was better off without her ‘interference’, as she called it. Whatever her reasoning, it didn’t justify her refusal to permanently settle in the UK after their mum’s stroke. That had been pure selfishness. Lisa had been offered a promotion, head of the new maths programme at the university, and she’d felt she couldn’t pass it up.

So here they were, another family drama, another request for his sister to step up and be a parent. How would she react this time? Would she be pleased? Angry? Indifferent? Would she offer to pay for the wedding? Suggest contacting Amy’s parents to discuss arrangements? Judging by Amy’s complaints about her father being too overbearing and strict, Scott couldn’t imagine news of his little girl’s upcoming nuptials would go down too well.

Scott needed an ally, someone to play bad cop to his good. And Lisa was the perfect bad cop. He wasn’t sure what the time was in India, but her voicemail kicked in. He was forced to leave a message asking her to call him back urgently.

There was no way he was dealing with this alone.