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ОглавлениеTHE HUMOUR OF HOLLAND.
THE KING’S DREAM.
“I STROLLED THOUGHTFULLY ALONG THE BEACH.”
King Bilbonzo. It is well. We ourself now desire to make an important communication to you.
Palaemon (Prime Minister and Chancellor of the Kingdom). We are all attention.
King Bilbonzo. It pleased us to have a very strange dream last night.
Courtiers. Aha!
King Bilbonzo. I dreamed, gentlemen, that I was on an island in the midst of the ocean. My royal palace, surrounded by luxuriant gardens, stood in the centre of the island. My whole retinue was assembled there,—they were all laughing, dancing, and feasting. On all sides, smiling faces, rustling silks, and waves of sweet dance-music. Meanwhile, I strolled thoughtfully along the beach, reflected on the bounties of nature, and picked up shells.
Courtiers. Ah!
King Bilbonzo. But suddenly the ground trembled under my feet. I looked up, and perceived that the whole island was moving under me. It heaved, rocked this way and that, rose and fell on the water, and, finally, shot swiftly over the surface of the foaming sea. The beautiful island, my lords and gentlemen, was a living, terrible sea-monster!
Courtiers (in horror). Ah!
King Bilbonzo. My courtiers clung to me in terror. My head swam. Suddenly the monster dived, and the sea at once destroyed the palace and gardens. I myself, with a few faithful ones—you, my lords, among the number—remained bobbing up and down, holding to an empty cask. But the monster came once more to the surface, lifted a huge dripping mouth out of the water, and swallowed us all.
Courtiers. B-r-r-r!—most horrible!
King Bilbonzo. However, after a short interval of oppressive darkness, it cast us out again uninjured—and I found myself in my bed!
Courtiers (drawing a long breath of relief). Eh!
King Bilbonzo. What is your opinion, my lords? Is this a prophetic vision?
Palaemon. It is a fact that the prophet Jonah, some time since, had the honour of experiencing something very like what your Majesty has just dreamed.
King Bilbonzo. Does any of you think himself in a position to explain this dream to me? [All shake their heads.]
Palaemon. Sire, I have been told that there is, at this moment, a Spanish magician staying in our capital. Perhaps he might be able to comply with your wish. I have already given orders to have this person searched for—probably he has already reached the palace....
King Bilbonzo. Why! this is exceedingly interesting! Be so good as to bring the man into our presence at once.
[Exit Palaemon.
Enter Palaemon, and Don Torribio, a Spanish magician.
Palaemon. Here is the man.
King Bilbonzo. Come nearer, my friend.
Don Torribio. Who told you that I am your friend? Are you in the thought-reading business too?
Homaris (3rd Minister). This is an unmannerly customer.
Palaemon. Do you know you are speaking to the King?
Don Torribio. Why, yes,—I thought so. I presume no one else would wear such a head-gear.
King Bilbonzo. Silence, my lords!—this is evidently an eccentric man. Let him alone. Magicians, fools, and poets have ever been allowed a certain familiarity with princes.
Don Torribio. You forget to add fleas, my prince.
Ministers. Hush!—shame!—shame!
King Bilbonzo. Decency! decency!
Don Torribio. I assure you they are very decent well-behaved little beasts, O King. They have never bitten you in your absence! They are the most honest of your subjects. They have never taken anything from you without informing you of the fact. There are not many like that. And they are not at present suffering from hunger. Not many like that either.
King Bilbonzo. Silence, now! Do you know wherefore you have been summoned hither?
Don Torribio. Certainly. We are going to act a little play together. You are Nebuchadnezzar, and I am Daniel.
King Bilbonzo (to Palaemon). I see your Excellency has already enlightened him.
Palaemon. Certainly not, your Majesty.
King Bilbonzo. Ah! this is indeed surprising. Listen then, and I will tell you my dream.
Don Torribio. No, no—you need not let me off any of my part. I mean to play Daniel entire—but I am not going to let you off the grass-eating, either! Do you listen to me, and I will interpret the dream.
King Bilbonzo. Well—this is astonishing!
Ministers. Think of that, now!
Homaris. All pre-concerted!
Don Torribio. Gathering shells is an innocent and even laudable employment,—but it should be carried on on a safe shore, and not within reach of hungry sea-monsters.
Every man—and more especially a king—ought to know what his house is built on.
If your house happens to stand—not on a rock foundation, but on the back of a sleeping whale, you must not dance too vigorously, or you will probably wake the brute.
It is safer to swim about in the sea on the back of a shark, than to be king of a famished people.
The conclusion of your dream I will interpret to you after the grass-eating. Now it is your turn.
King Bilbonzo. This is really going too far! Our toleration has reached its limits. Can you be wanting to sow discord between Us and our beloved people? Out of our sight, impious liar!—this very moment!
Hyacinthe (the Poet-Laureate—seated next to the King). Majesty!—look out for your crown!
King Bilbonzo. Oh!—thanks! [Sets his crown straight.]
Don Torribio. Omen accipio. How do you wish me to disappear, O King?
Palaemon (to a footman). Fetch the lictors to remove this person.
King Bilbonzo. My lords, you will agree with me that a man like this is very dangerous to the State.
Homaris. I had feared as much, Sire! He is a clever quack, and what he sells is poison for the people.
Lepidus. But his knowledge was something wonderful.
Homaris. Tricks!—most likely there’s bribery at the bottom of it.
Hyacinthe. Or else atheistic magic.
King Bilbonzo. In any case, my Lord Palaemon, you ought to have taken measures somewhat earlier to prevent his doing harm.
Palaemon. He shall be thrown into chains at once.
Amenias (4th Minister). It is really a case for capital punishment.
King Bilbonzo. No—our delight is to show mercy. When the judges have condemned him to death, we will commute the sentence into penal servitude for life.
A Footman. Your Excellency!—the lictors.
[Torribio has suddenly vanished during the previous conversation.]
Palaemon. Let this man be strictly confined.
A Footman. What man, your Excellency?
Palaemon. Here—what! Where is he?
Ministers. What! Where is he? Gone?
King Bilbonzo. This is unspeakably insolent!
Amenias. He was standing here when I last saw him.
Palaemon. He was standing here.
[They search all over the room.]
King Bilbonzo (to Amenias). What is that on the floor?
Amenias (picking it up). A tuft of grass, Sire!
King Bilbonzo. This is infamous ribaldry.
Lepidus. It is very mysterious.
Homaris. Jugglers’ tricks! We have all been made fools of.
Footman (opening a door). Breakfast is served, your Majesty!
King Bilbonzo. Come, my lords,—search no further! It is not worth while. Follow me! [He retires with dignity.]
Hyacinthe (follows, improvising)—
Shall hate and envy dim its lustre—
The crown on royal brows that glows—
And rob the People of their father,
And lead both parties by the nose?
La, la, la, la—no, never! no, never!
La, la, la!
[Exeunt omnes, following one another in a solemn procession.
Frederick Van Eeden.
(From the Comedy of “Don Torribio.”)
