Читать книгу Inanimate Heroes - Zack W. Van - Страница 8

Waking up in the morning is always the first and worst experience of my day. My mom would pop her head in at 6:30am and wake me up as joyfully as possible when I knew she felt the same exact way. I looked at my cell phone and couldn’t believe I slept through that entire day after school. I did have a much less dire feeling about today though. I sat in bed for a few moments to contemplate if I would even go to school.

Ultimately I decided it would be best if I went. I looked out the window and saw that it was cloudy and muggy out. It was almost eerily fitting that this day would be dark and dreary. My wake-up routine was typical; I got out of bed very slowly each morning. First I would let my left leg dangle off the side, and then my right. After that I sat up perpendicular to the edge of the bed and slowly let myself slip off and onto the floor, making a sound as if I literally rolled off my bed.

I looked on my dresser and mechanically picked up my hair straightener. I dropped it as if I had just picked up the hot steel when it was plugged in.

“I’m just going to take a shower and let my hair curl for today.” It was very common that I would have conversations with myself early in the morning. I opened my door and saw my mother sipping her coffee and watching the news. I just couldn’t muster up the courage to watch the morning news unless I thought it was going to be a snow day. It was such a depressing way to start off your morning in the first place and I marveled at how she could stand it. She just smiled at me and said good morning cheerfully as I walked into the bathroom adjacent to my own room. I turned on the hot water and it squeaked for several seconds like it always did. As I stepped into the running water, it felt as if I would wash away and rinse myself down the drain. I still hadn’t felt all that whole since yesterday, but I was slowly piecing myself back together.

After my shower I towel-dried my hair for a few seconds and considered it as my new hairstyle for school. All I had to do was stay up and out of the radar of those kids and I was in the clear. I had a twinge of anger towards myself in that I had surrendered to enemy demands. It only took one shot but it was of great aim. Hopefully my hair was the white flag they had been looking for. After I dressed myself and sprayed myself in an abusively thick layer of cologne, I saw the picture of Faye and me in our 8^th grade graduation. At my right arm was Faye and my left was Kathy, my other best friend. Things were just so much easier back then. Your best friends were your neighbors and your other friends you had known since kindergarten.

I laughed out loud at how old I sounded in my head and walked out into the living room to put my shoes on. I looked at the clock and saw that it was a bit early, but I didn’t want to have to run for it like I did yesterday. I kissed my mom on the cheek and she smiled and shouted “give em’ hell”. I walked out the door and was on my way to the bus stop while wondering if she knew what was going on all along.

As I walked along the fall road the leaves swished past my feet. It looked like a calendar picture that they put up for October. Being the beginning of September however, the trees were still fairly alive with orange and red leaves. I would walk one block to the first corner, and then two more blocks up the hill. I searched frantically in my mind for the positives of today compared to yesterday. I knew where I was sitting at lunch and in each class. I also had a basic description of where I was going which was nice. I had mapped out how I would avoid the boys in the hall so that I could just get out without having anything to annoy me. It was also a Friday today, which was extremely nice and yet all the more tempting to skip school for a three-day weekend.

Before I realized it, I looked up and I was at the bus stop. I could see Faye coming around the corner and heading for me as well as Sandy. Doug hadn’t usually come to the bus stop until the very last few minutes. She did live right on the corner after all. I watched Sandy as her wet blond hair flew in the wind like a tattered flag. She never put it up or wore a hat, but it always seemed just as nice no matter how much wind, rain or snow flew into it. Faye always wore either her hood or a small beanie with her dark hair following close behind her. They were both the type that was naturally beautiful and could easily pass as one of the Miss America Contestants.

Sandy and Faye arrived at the stop only a few steps apart. I looked down the road behind me and saw Mathew and Jeremiah walking up the street to our stop as well.

“Our stop is too god damn boring so we’re coming up to you pretty girls- and Andy of course.” Mathew laughed and snorted as he always did and then gave me a hug as he arrived. Jeremiah lit up a cigarette and the two boys shared it a couple feet from the corner. I had a feeling that Faye had the slightest crush on Jeremiah. She would never admit it to me however, as she had a boyfriend who I currently hated like poison.

She was never one to admit she was wrong or unhappy; especially if I was the one who told her so. Until I told her he was a great guy, she would probably stay with him. Mathew and Jeremiah were the boys that came from the wrong side of the tracks. As nice and funny as they were to us, they would start a fight over anyone who had said wrong to them or a friend. I had a small attraction to Mathew as he had always protected me and made me feel safe, even when we were little kids.

The bus had come around the corner and was visible even though it was 4 blocks down the street. Doug came out of her house and walked leisurely to the bus stop. Mathew threw down his cigarette and stepped on it as if he was disgusted with it.

”Well I’m gettin the hell outta here. See ya guys! Have fun at school!” I was dumbfounded that Mathew was just going to go home and not even bother coming on the bus.

“Why did you come to the bus stop if you’re not going to school?” He gave me a smirk and laughed as he spoke.

“Cus I wanted to see you guys. That alright?” I suddenly felt stupid and rude as if I had betrayed him in some despicable way for asking.

“Yeah I was just curious is all…” My voice trailed off in a way that he could tell I was sorry I said anything. He hugged me jovially and told me to just have a good day at school. He smelled like an ashtray but I felt so safe there in his arms; just like when I was little. I wished I could take him to school and point out the boys who were mean to me. I laughed at how childish the whole thing sounded as he let go of me and walked down the road and out of the bus driver’s sight. Sandy scoffed and flipped her hair toward him when he was just out of ear-sight.

“He’s gonna fail freshman year if that’s his attitude towards it.” Faye nodded her affirmation and Jeremiah didn’t seem to even notice the comment. I wanted to stand up for him and defend him as he had countless times for me, but I knew that what Sandy had said was the truth. I mentally waved goodbye to Mathew and turned around as the bus screeched to a halt in front of us.

It was generally a struggle between all of us to get onto the bus first. We were one of the last stops on the way to school and it was always full of upperclassmen. Luckily for me, my friend Kathy had already saved me a spot near the front. As I sat down Kathy immediately unloaded on me about how much of a bitch her step-mom had been that morning and what ridiculous and outlandish things she had done. As much as I loved Kathy she was the biggest martyr I had ever met. She portrayed that she apparently had the worst life a human being could possibly ever have. I listened blankly and nodded or agreed when it was expected of me. At the next stop down, a new friend of Kathy’s got on the bus. Her name was Rachel and she was the same type of person with everyone’s burden to bear. Rachel sat in the seat next to us and a girl who was talking on her cell phone. As the two of them started talking, I heard Rachel mention my name and my ears perked up like a dog.

“So what do you think Andy?” I looked at Rachel as if I had never seen her before in my life and scrambled for something to say.

“Huh?” It wasn’t the best answer but I supposed it wasn’t necessarily the worst either.

“About Troy? What do you think of him?” I paused for a moment and answered slowly.

“I don’t know a Troy.” I inexplicably felt as if I wanted to shout at Rachel to stop talking altogether. Her voice was irritable and reminded me of the valley girls portrayed on television. Soon after that thought I felt guilty and realized it was just me being ornery from a combination of things. Kathy spoke on my behalf as if she were my lawyer.

“He hasn’t met Troy yet, but I know that Troy is interested in meeting him.” I began to panic slightly and wondered who or what Troy was. Why the hell would he want to meet me so badly? As if Kathy read my mind, she answered the silent question as if she just heard it through an earpiece. “Ashley told him you were gay and stuff so, he wants to meet you. He’s one of the only gay kids at Tomliw.” My face instantaneously turned red as I tried to hide it by putting my face on the back of the bus seat in front of us.

“Kathy, how many people have you been telling that I am gay?” I was certainly upset but the tone of my voice didn’t seem like it at all. It was a dull whisper as if I was a toddler talking during naptime. Kathy shrugged like it was no big deal and said that Ashley had figured it out herself. It wasn’t necessarily true that I tried hard to hide it, but I hated the fact that it was so obvious. When someone would ask me, I would laugh nervously and say no. There would not be a plausible way for me to keep up the facade, considering people are already guessing about it with their own suspicions.

We arrived at the school and the bus came to a screeching stop as we all stood up to get off. As Kathy and I got off of the bus, we would stop and wait for Faye to catch up with us. Once she had gotten off, we would all walk into the school and enter the commons. Our bus was usually one of the last to school and the tables were often swamped. We sat at the table at the end of the rows and were shortly greeted by several of our friends from grade school. Kathy had no problem in making new friends in school and most of what our table was filled with were kids I’d never met. Faye and I had always been more of the shy type at first and would let friends come to us naturally, but it seemed as if Kathy sought them out.

Soon after we arrived, the first bell had rung and we began to get up and leave the table for our first period classes. All of us whined nearly in unison as we collected our things and said our goodbyes. Today was the start of a new day and hopefully the days would get better as I assimilated into the school. All I could pray for today was that I could just get through school and survive until the weekend. As I walked up the stairs to my first hour, I was lightly shoved as someone walked up behind me. My first instinct was hostility. I would turn around and sneer at the jackass who just shoved me. It was probably one or both of the boys from the incident in the hall. As I turned around however, I learned that my sneer would do no use in the face of my newest problem.