Читать книгу The Dark Night Of The Soul - Aldivan Teixeira Torres, Daniele Giuffre' - Страница 17

The time passes rapidly and a new day dawns. Its arrival brings new and disquieting preoccupations to an unprepared dreamer. I ask myself: Could the sins of the flesh be so dangerous to the point of affecting my purity? Thinking a little more, I decide to carry on risking, even if that could have grave consequences to me. With the strength of that new decision, I get up and go to the improvised bathroom of the cabin to take a bath. On the way, I try to put my mind at peace to enjoy those moments of leisure. I go in, close the door, get undressed and grab the bucket of cold water that I myself had prepared the night before. I start bathing and having thrown the first amount of cold water I begin reflecting about the sacred place where I am. I think a little about the mountain and about its importance in my life. I end up concluding that it was really sacred for its climate, its history of which I was part of, challenges, hidden mysteries and even the very cave itself. I continue the conclusions and arrive at a common denominator: Nobody ever will know it completely, unless he evolves till perfection. In it, I could find my opposing forces and, by becoming the seer, was able to control those forces. Now, I was searching for the knowledge and understanding about the dark night through which we all pass. On that path I had accomplished two stages. But still there were seven more, unforeseen, which I have had no time to think about.

I try to concentrate on the bath and forget, for a moment, the preoccupations. The strategy is good, I carry on with the ritual, put on soap, throw more water over the body and make an effort to take away all the impurities. When I feel totally clean, I grab a towel, dry myself and put on clean clothes. I leave the bathroom and go to the kitchen to make my breakfast. When I get there, I begin to fry the appetizing chicken eggs that I got in the woods. I spend some time making my food and when it is ready, I eat it straight away. I take the opportunity to sit down for a while, and when I do that, I yearn for home, for my mother and my good life. All this was happening for I was used to have a good breakfast and family warmth. Another moment goes by and I shook my head: All of this would be much easier if they support me in my career and my dreams. I would certainly have another reason to carry on fighting and affirm myself ever more as the seer transformed by the cave. But I turn away those thoughts, for they only hurt me now. Then I plan my strategy for the next challenge.

With all set, I go out of the cabin and take the eastern direction, for I haven’t gone that way yet. The beginning of that path is done in a customary manner, without hurry, for I still had to mentally prepare myself for the impacts that may come. At this moment one needs to be careful, for the previous challenges have proved that the cardinal sins are stronger than I had imagined. Probably this third stage will not be different too. Strengthened by those sins, I reach the conclusion that the dark night, in this instance, would have the power to condemn. How to be safe then? That is the answer that I am looking for. After passing through all the stages of my personal evolution, I certainly will have a position of respect. In the meantime, I would have to take care of the present challenge. Without any more preoccupations, I continue.

Further on, in my field of vision, appear three youths dressed as prostitutes. Although still far away I realized that they were very beautiful and ingratiating. When they become aware of my presence, they wave to me and I decide to get closer to investigate further. As I got near, the dark night intensifies and the impact freezes me. The next moment, they introduced themselves and invite me to accompany them. Without giving it much thought, I decide to accept and we carry on walking. At half way they surround me forming a circle of darkness. At this precise moment, the dark night snatches my heart and I am forced to remember the experiences that have made me suffer. Distressed, I try to get out of the circle, but it is too strong even for me who is a prepared and evolved seer.

Sometime later, a sequence of doors open in front of me, and I am pushed against one of them by the prostitutes. In a few seconds, my mind and body go through tunnels where the pleasures of the flesh are enjoyed. As I have such experience, I tremble with the images, for what is sacred becomes an act of pure savagery. In order to not suffer so much, I close my eyes, but even so I am still restless. Over the time, the circle tightens and travelling through the tunnel I end up arriving at a large room, where someone is already waiting for me. I concentrate mentally, trying to cleanse the heart and the soul, even after everything that I saw and heard, and the circle snaps up. Thereby, the dark night goes away for a while and I feel more reassured. I decide then to approach the person in the room and touching him, the revelations and visions reappear.

“Philip is a public official of high rank and as a consequence of his job he leads a stable life together with the other members of his family: His wife, Katherine, and his two sons, Luke and Joseph. In family life, Phillip is very affectionate and responsible. However, about his character, he is not so perfect, for he acts in a disproportionate manner in some instances. For instance, he likes parties, most of the times in the company of ex-university colleagues and in these occasions, takes advantage to drink a lot in order to pervert the senses and get friendly with some women always present. It was this path that lead to the first betrayals. In the beginning he was cautious and did cause any suspicions. However, as time went by, he convinced himself that his attitude was normal for a man and did not care about discretion anymore. One day, the inevitable occurred: His wife found out about his infidelities and was totally disillusioned with her husband. She believed that she was married to the right person and that the conjugal love was for ever. Angry, she fights with her husband, but did not separate, for the love of the sons is greater. He no longer cares to be caught up and carries on in his path of betrayal. Time goes by, the situation doesn’t change and it brings a serious illnesses that kills him. He is judged and the dark night use the wife’s pain to condemn him. He is one more that the darkness claims for its shed and this is certainly the end for all the perverts.

The vision ends, the man says goodbye, recommending that I spread his story throughout the world. I agree, and a strong wind carries me towards the tunnel. In a few seconds I am back at the top of the mountain, changed by the knowledge of the third cardinal sin. Now, there were only six stages left for the complete understanding of the dark night that terrifies all the hearts.