Читать книгу Midwives On-Call - Алисон Робертс - Страница 13
CHAPTER FOUR
ОглавлениеDARCIE REALLY WAS DROOPING. Once home she thanked Isla and Rupert for the night out and went straight to bed. Thankfully Isla didn’t have to work out what to say—Rupert said it for her.
‘I’m guessing we’re breaking up?’
‘We are.’ Isla forced a brave smile. ‘You can say that I’m sick and tired of all your other women.’
‘How are you going to go at the ball with your Greek friend there? I assume he’s a big part of the reason for us finishing tonight.’
‘He hates me,’ Isla said. ‘And I don’t particularly like him, either.’
‘Well, that sounds like a good start to me.’ Rupert smiled. He knew Isla very well and there were very few people that she allowed to get under her skin. He had felt the undeniable tension all night and had seen Alessi’s eyes all too often turn to look towards Isla. ‘It’s more than time you got out there.’
‘Well, I shan’t be getting out there with Alessi. His relationships seem to last as long as a tube of toothpaste.’
‘Ah, but you have to brush your teeth, Isla.’ To Rupert, it was that simple. ‘Go for it. It’s as clear as anything that you fancy each other. Why not just give the two of you a try? If it doesn’t work out, it’s no big deal.’
It was to Isla, though.
They said goodbye at the door—it was possibly the nicest break-up in the world.
‘This is way overdue, Isla,’ Rupert said as he gave her a cuddle. Even he didn’t know about Isabel and just how deep Isla’s fears ran, and saying goodbye to her rock of ten years was hard.
‘I know.’ She gave him a smile. ‘Will you be okay?’
‘I shall, but, Isla, can I ask that you don’t—’
Isla knew what he was about to say and said it for him. ‘I shan’t tell anyone about you.’
‘Promise me.’ His voice was urgent. ‘I’m auditioning soon for a really big role. If I do get it then I’m going to be even more in the spotlight …’ She could hear his fear and she understood it. She, too, would be terrified to have her sex life, or lack of it, put under the scrutiny of anyone, let alone having it discussed the world over. ‘I haven’t even told my parents, Isla …’
‘It’s okay,’ Isla soothed, remembering the promise she had made all those years ago. ‘I gave you my word.’
When Isla awoke the next morning and headed into work with Darcie, the world felt very different without her safety net.
Not that anyone could know just how exposed and vulnerable she felt. She was her usual cool self while secretly hoping that the world might treat her gently.
The world, though, had other plans for Isla—around eleven, she answered a page from the antenatal clinic. It was Sophia, one of the community midwives, who, because of low staff numbers, was doing an extra shift onsite today and running the antenatal clinic.
‘Thanks for answering so quickly,’ Sophia said. ‘I wasn’t sure whether or not to page you. I’m probably—’
‘Always page me,’ Isla interrupted. ‘It doesn’t matter how small your concern is, I hope you know that.’
‘I do,’ Sophia said. ‘It’s not a patient I’m concerned about, more a situation that I’m not sure how to handle. Alessi dropped by this morning and said that when his sister arrived for her antenatal visit I was to page him so that he could come down. Allegra is actually his twin sister.’
‘Okay,’ Isla replied, wondering where this was leading as Sophia continued.
‘She’s thirty-two weeks gestation and Darcie has asked her to go onto a CTG monitor now for a checkup—all is well but Darcie just wanted to be thorough as she’s taking over her care and Allegra has quite a complicated history. The trouble is, when I said that I would let Alessi know that she was here, Allegra asked me not to. She wants me to just say that I forgot to page him …’
‘And no doubt you’re worried about what Alessi will say when you tell him that you forgot to let him know?’ Isla said, and then thought for a moment. ‘It is a bit awkward,’ she admitted as she pondered the issue while doing her level best to think this through as she would for any patient who was related to one of the staff here. She had to somehow forget that the staff member happened to be Alessi who, after last night, she was doing her level best to avoid.
Ignore that fact, she told herself.
‘I’ll come over to Antenatal now and speak with Allegra,’ Isla offered. ‘And I’ll also deal with Alessi. Thank you for letting me know, Sophia.’
Isla made her way down to the antenatal clinic and Sophia told her where Allegra was. Isla knocked on the door and went in and smiled when she saw Allegra. She was the female version of Alessi with black eyes and black hair and, while strapped to the CTG monitor, she was also doing her level best to keep a wriggling little boy of around three years old amused.
‘Hi, Allegra,’ Isla greeted her. ‘I’m Isla, the head of midwifery.’
‘Hello, Isla.’ Allegra smiled. ‘Is this about Alessi? I realised as soon as I said it that the midwife was feeling a bit awkward when I asked her to pretend she’d forgotten I was here. I’m so sorry about that. I should have discussed this with Alessi myself, instead of landing my problems on Sophia.’
‘It’s fine,’ Isla said, and looked over at the little boy. ‘You’ve got your hands full, I see.’
‘Very,’ Allegra agreed. ‘Sophia gave him a colouring book and some pencils but he’s just climbing all over me at the moment. I think Niko’s starting to fathom that he’s not going to have me all to himself for much longer.’
‘Probably,’ Isla said, and sat down in a chair near Allegra. ‘They’re very intuitive and they often sense that change is about to come. Hey, Niko, do you want to come and sit with me?’ Isla suggested to the little black-eyed boy who had the same curls as his uncle. ‘Look what I’ve got …’
Niko looked at Isla, who had taken out her pen torch and was flicking it on and off. It worked as a diversion tactic almost every time with three-year-olds and thankfully it worked today. Niko climbed down from his mum’s lap and made his way over to Isla. She noted that he had a slightly abnormal gait as he walked over and climbed up onto her lap.
‘Look,’ Isla said, flicking the pen torch on and off and then giving it to Niko, who tried to do the same. Only he soon found out that it wasn’t as easy as Isla had made it look and he would hopefully take several moments to work it out and give Allegra a small break while they chatted and Allegra explained her reasons for not wanting Alessi there.
‘I had a very difficult labour with Niko,’ Allegra said. ‘We were living in Sydney at the time. He was a breech birth and I ended up having an emergency Caesarean section after a very long labour.’ Allegra paused for a moment before continuing—clearly the memory of it still distressed her. ‘Niko wasn’t breathing when he was born and had to be resuscitated. As a consequence he was without oxygen and has now got mild cerebral palsy.’
‘That must have been a very scary time for you,’ Isla offered.
‘It was,’ Allegra agreed. ‘I wasn’t at all well after the birth, either. The thing is, there were a couple of mistakes made and possibly what happened could have been prevented. I chose not to pursue it. I just wanted to put it all behind me. Alessi, though, was pretty devastated as well as furious. I know he thinks if he’d been there, or at least around, then I’d have been taken to Theatre more quickly and Niko’s birth injury could have been avoided. My parents said pretty much the same to him, too.’
Isla said nothing but her heart went out to them both.
‘I don’t want Alessi to be involved in this birth, not because I don’t think he’s brilliant, it’s more that if something does go wrong this time around then I don’t want him blaming himself for it.’
‘I completely understand that you’d feel that way.’ Isla nodded but because she’d had a brief look at Allegra’s notes before she’d come in, she knew that there was more. ‘And?’
‘And?’ Allegra smiled at Isla’s question.
‘Is there another reason that you don’t want Alessi’s input?’
‘There is.’ Allegra rolled her eyes in the very same way that her brother did. ‘I want to try and have a natural birth this time. Given what happened in my previous labour, Alessi is against the idea of trial of labour and thinks I should have a planned Caesarean section.’
‘So, not only do you have to convince your obstetrician, you have to convince your brother, as well?’
‘Ah, not just those two,’ Allegra sighed. ‘I’ve had to convince my husband and also my mother.’ She gave a tired shake of the head. ‘Usually I’m the golden one and Alessi’s the black sheep but in this she thinks I should listen to him, because he’s a doctor.’
Isla fought her own curiosity about that statement—while she wanted to know more about Alessi, this wasn’t the place, and she could see Allegra was close to tears. ‘What happened with Niko has brought up a lot of stuff for my parents. Maybe I should just have a planned Caesarean. I really am sorry for trying to involve your staff in this.’
‘It’s our job to be involved,’ Isla said, and she truly did her best to pretend this wasn’t Alessi’s twin pouring her heart out to her. Which meant, if this hadn’t been Alessi’s twin then Isla knew exactly what she would do in this case. ‘It’s your pregnancy and your labour. You shouldn’t go through an operation just to please your family. I can explain all that to him.’
Allegra looked dubious. ‘I don’t know how well he’d take it.’
‘I would imagine that when I explain what’s going on to Alessi, he’s going to feel bad for causing you so much stress …’
‘I know that he shall,’ Allegra agreed. ‘We’re very close. The thing is Alessi has always looked out for me at school and things …’ She looked at Isla. ‘I remember you from school.’
Isla felt a little guilty that she didn’t remember Allegra clearly.
‘I got picked on a lot at school,’ Allegra said. ‘Well, we both did.’
‘Really?’ Isla couldn’t imagine for a moment Alessi being picked on by anyone, he was so confident and assured, but then Allegra continued speaking.
‘We were scholarship kids,’ she explained. ‘Which meant from the day that we started we didn’t belong. At every opportunity it would be rammed down our throats that we couldn’t afford to go skiing or that we didn’t have the right uniform. It was very cruel. Alessi looked out for me then and is just trying to do the same now. The thing is …’ Allegra hesitated and Isla stepped in.
‘You don’t need him to any more?’
‘No, I don’t.’ Allegra sighed. ‘I’m not going to take any risks with this baby but I really do want to try and have a natural delivery.’ She thought for a long moment. ‘It would be great if you could speak to him for me. I really have tried and I seem to get nowhere.’
Isla nodded. ‘You’re not the first patient to have this sort of problem. I’ve dealt with this on several occasions. No doubt I’ll be the same if my sister ever gets pregnant. It’s very hard to step back when you love someone, though Alessi needs to in this.’
‘Thanks, Isla.’
Niko had actually fallen asleep while they’d been talking. Isla carried him over to one of the empty reclining chairs next to Allegra and laid him down, then went and looked at the CTG monitor. ‘Everything looks very good,’ Isla said. ‘Right, I’m going to have a word with that brother of yours and don’t worry. If you have any concerns, any at all, ring through to MMU and ask to be put through to me.’
‘Thanks so much.’
As she walked out of the room there was Alessi, speaking with Sophia and frowning.
‘I asked you to page me as soon as Allegra arrived—’
‘Alessi,’ Isla said, and gave a small smile to Sophia, excusing her from the conversation. ‘Sophia paged me. I need to speak with you about your sister.’ She saw concern flash across his features and immediately put him at ease. ‘There’s nothing wrong with the baby, but before you go in and see Allegra there is something that I need to discuss with you.’
Alessi’s eyebrows rose and she had a feeling he was about to walk off but he gave a small nod.
‘What is it that you want to discuss?’
‘Perhaps not here.’ Isla gestured to one of the consulting rooms and they both walked over to it.
It was awkward to be in there with him, given all that had, or rather hadn’t, taken place between them, but Isla pushed all that aside and dealt with what was important—the patient. She took a seat at the desk and Alessi did the same. With the door closed she could smell his cologne and she really wished this conversation didn’t have to take place on the tail end of last night, but she had no choice in the timing of things and so she pushed on.
‘I’ve just been speaking with Allegra. We’ve had quite a long conversation, in fact,’ she ventured. ‘The thing is, while Allegra really appreciates your concern about the pregnancy—’
‘I don’t need you interfering in my family, Isla,’ Alessi interrupted, and it was clear that he knew what the discussion would be about and wanted no part of it.
‘I’d prefer not to have to but it’s not about what I’d prefer and it’s not about what you need—this is about Allegra.’
Alessi took a breath. ‘Isla, I’m not going to discuss this with you.’
‘You don’t have to discuss anything with me, Alessi,’ Isla answered calmly. ‘I’m just asking that you take a few minutes to listen.’ He went to stand but Isla halted him. ‘Alessi, Allegra isn’t your patient, she’s my patient in my unit.’
‘I’ll discuss this directly with Allegra,’ Alessi said, and headed for the door.
‘And cause her more stress?’ Isla responded, and watched as his shoulders stiffened. It really was a difficult subject to approach. She hadn’t been lying when she’d said to Allegra that she’d handled this sort of situation several times and she would be blunt if she had to be. ‘Allegra knows that you’re just trying to look out for her and while she does appreciate it she wants you to be the baby’s uncle rather than some hovering neonatologist. Everything is going well this pregnancy.’
‘Everything was going well the last one,’ Alessi said, though at least he sat back down.
‘Do you think that Allegra doesn’t already know all that?’ Isla asked, and watched as Alessi closed his eyes and breathed out. ‘Do you think she hasn’t wrestled for a long time with her decisions before making them?’
‘I’m really causing stress for her?’ he asked. When she didn’t say anything his black eyes met hers and he gave a wry smile as he answered his own question. ‘Clearly I am. God, I never meant to, Isla. The thing is, what happened during Niko’s labour was preventable. I just want to …’ His voice trailed off.
‘You want to ensure that nothing goes wrong with this one,’ Isla finished for him, and Alessi nodded. ‘I get that but if something does go wrong, if an emergency does arise, do you really want to be a part of it?’
‘I want to be there to ensure nothing untoward happens in the first place.’
‘Look, I do get that …’ Isla started but Alessi didn’t let her finish.
‘Allegra going for a natural delivery is a crazy idea, given what happened last time.’
‘It’s not a crazy idea to Allegra, and it’s not a crazy idea to her obstetrician—’
‘Darcie’s been here all of five minutes.’
Isla chose to ignore that. She knew it was hard when another doctor took over a patient’s care but it wasn’t for Alessi to air his concerns to his sister so she continued with what she was saying. ‘And it isn’t a crazy idea to me. A lot of women want to experience a natural delivery. She’d have a closely monitored trial of labour and if things didn’t progress well then, perhaps more quickly, given her history, things would move towards a Caesarean. Even if Darcie is new, our recruitment policy is vigorous and she’s joined an amazing team, which means that your sister shall be well looked after here, Alessi, you know that.’
Alessi thought for a long moment. Really, he could only admire Isla for confronting him on this difficult subject but her help didn’t end there.
‘If it makes it any easier for you,’ she continued, ‘I’m happy to oversee Allegra’s care.’
Alessi’s eyes jerked up and met hers.
‘Whatever you think about me personally, Alessi, however you think I landed the role, the truth is I think that we both know that I do a very good job. I will, if you would like, keep an eye on Allegra during her antenatal visits and, as far as possible, I will be there for the birth.’
‘You’d do that?’
‘Of course.’
Alessi was surprised by her offer but, then again, was he? For nearly a year he had chosen to believe she had got the job because of who her father was. He had been wrong about that. Alessi had known it deep down and it was confirmed right now. The patients all raved about her, there was no doubt that she ran a very good midwifery unit and now she was offering to take care of Allegra when both knew how tense things were between them. Even the fact that Allegra had discussed so much with Isla told Alessi something—she didn’t open up easily to anyone, yet she had with Isla. ‘I would like that and I’ll back off, too,’ Alessi said, and then stood. ‘Thank you.’
‘No problem.’
He went to go but then turned around. ‘I was going to come and see you later,’ Alessi said. ‘But now that we’re here, I might as well just say it now—I would like to apologise for the things that I said last night.’ Isla found she was holding her breath as he continued, ‘I had no right to lecture you about your partner and the choices you make. It was out of character for me and I really would like to apologise.’
‘It’s fine.’
‘Also, I broke up with Amber last night, so you don’t have to worry that I’m dating one of your students.’
‘Because of what I said?’
Alessi let out a very mirthless laugh. ‘No.’
‘But …’
‘As I said, I don’t cheat and, given that last night the only person I wanted was you, it seemed appropriate to end things.’
And with that he was gone and only when the door closed behind him did Isla let out the air trapped in her throat—her lungs were still closed tight.
Had he just said what he had?
Yes.
Did that mean …?
It did.
Oh, God.
It was like being tossed three flaming torches and having to learn to juggle with absolutely no clue how.
She walked out of the consulting room into a world that felt very different—Alessi liked her, in that way, and had made it clear that he was single. There was no Rupert to hide behind any more, not that she’d told Alessi that.
She was on the edge of something—scared to step off yet somehow compelled to.
Allegra was holding Niko and speaking with Sophia, but Isla watched her turn and smile widely at her brother as he came over, and as Isla approached she heard their conversation.
‘You should have said.’ Alessi gave her a cuddle.
‘I tried,’ Allegra gently scolded. ‘Several times.’
‘I’ll back off and I’ll make sure Mum and Dad do, too,’ Alessi promised. ‘I just …’
‘I know,’ Allegra said. ‘I know you were just trying to do your best for us.’ She looked at Isla as she joined them. ‘Thank you so much, Isla.’
‘It’s no problem. I’ve spoken with Alessi and, if you’re happy for me to do so, I can oversee things and come down and check all your antenatal visits, rather than your brother, and then, if you’d like, I’d be delighted to be there for your birth of your second child.’
‘I’d really like that, Isla.’
‘Good.’
She nodded goodbye and as Isla walked off Allegra smiled. ‘I feel so much better. You really will speak to Mum and Dad?’
‘Yep.’
‘They’ll give you a hard time,’ Allegra pointed out.
‘So, what’s new?’
‘’Lessi!’ Niko, fed up with all the adults, held out his arms to his uncle and, from a slight distance Isla watched as Alessi took his little nephew in his arms and gave him a kiss and then he must have said something funny because Niko laughed and laughed and Alessi grinned, too.
Then he turned and caught her staring at him and the smile remained as she blushed and returned it then quickly walked away, to return to the ward.
Yes, she was on the edge of something.
Something temporary, though. She knew that much about Alessi and she had almost reconciled herself to that.
Yes, this year was going to be very different. Alessi was going to be her first.
Even if he mustn’t know it.
Somehow she had to hold onto her glamorous, sophisticated reputation while releasing a little of her heart.