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Chapter 1 The Fundamentals

1.01 Greeting People

1.02 Follow-up Expressions

1.03 Commenting on the Weather

1.04 Being Introduced

1.05 Saying Goodbye

1.06 Expressing Gratitude

1.07 A Few Notes on Respect Language

1.08 Apologizing

1.09 Asking Permission

1.10 Making Requests

1.11 Leading up to a Request

1.12 Refusing Requests

Chapter1

The Fundamentals

Greetings and other set expressions help any society run smoothly. In Japan, these phrases delineate relationships, offer face-saving ways to deal with difficult situations, and provide a convenient shorthand for expressing thanks or regret. In Japanese there is no need to be original; in most situations, there is no phrase better than the set phrase.

I’ve run through the main greetings, but you will need to follow these up with a word of thanks. When meeting in person or on the phone, people seem to have this remarkable facility for remembering your last encounter. It’s embedded in the language. So use some of the follow-up expressions listed as a kind of shorthand. Just a phrase, and a set phrase at that, recreates the circumstances of the last time you met. There’s no need to go into detail. With that one set phrase you have reinforced the relationship.

Relations are quite formal in Japan, with proper introductions being the norm. Again there are set phrases. After you get used to it you may find this way of dealing with people quietly reassuring.

Bowing is infectious, and after a while you’ll probably start doing it too. If you’re going to do it, you might as well do it right. A proper bow (o-jigi) is from the waist: about 15 degrees is fine for most situations. Men keep the arms straight at the sides, women place their hands in front. A nod of the head (eshaku) is also used for brief thanks or to acknowledge people when you meet them. No need to be obsequious, and don’t stick your head out like a chicken.

This chapter also includes some notes on respect language. All languages have different levels of politeness. I’ve tried to explain the basic principles and there will be examples throughout the book. It’s part and parcel of the language.

Finally, avoid the use of pronouns. Anata translates as “you” but its use is generally avoided. (One exception is when wives call their husbands anata —it has the special meaning of “darling.”) When talking to someone, you can be safe and say his or her name, with the suffix - san, every time you want to say “you.” Otherwise, refer to teachers, doctors, speakers, and government officials as sensei (teacher), and higher ranking members in your company by their titles. For example, if you want to ask your manager’s opinion, say, with a rising intonation, Kachō no o-kangae wa? Similarly, the use of the first person pronoun meaning ”I” (watashi wa) sounds as if you’re drawing attention to yourself. Generally, it’s not necessary for the sense of the sentence.

So, to get started, here are some basic greetings and phrases to use in different situations with, for your interest, some notes on their usage.

1.01 Greeting People aisatsu 挨拶

Ohayō gozaimasu お早うございます Good Morning

“It’s early” is the literal meaning and it was originally used to thank people coming into work. It’s still used in this sense in the entertainment industry when someone starting work in the afternoon will be greeted like this. Friends drop the gozaimasu.

Konnichi wa こんにちは Good afternoon or Hello

Used from late morning to late afternoon but not as much as Hello or Ohayō gozaimasu. It’s not usually said to colleagues or family members. When you feel you should be polite, say Shitsurei shimasu (below) instead.

Konban wa しんはんは Good Evening

This too is somewhat more limited in its use. If you’re living with a Japanese family, it might make you sound standoffish, as if you don’t want to be treated like a member of the family.

Shitsurei shimasu/O-jama shimasu

失礼します/お邪魔します

Excuse me (lit. I am about to disturb you)

Either of these two polite expressions would be appropriate when entering or leaving someone’s home or office.

Tadaima ただいま I’m home!

The response by those in the house is Okaeri-nasai お帰りなさい. Said by a waiter in a restaurant, tadaima means “right away”.

1.02 Follow-up Expressions

Quickly think back to the last time you met the person and use one of these phrases. If you met them recently you could simply say:

• Konaida wa dōmo.

こないだはどうも。

Thank you for the other day.

Or more politely

• Senjitsu wa dōmo arigatō gozaimashita.

先日はどうもありがどうございました。

Thank you very much for the other day.

If you went to their house or they treated you to a meal, be sure to say,

• Konaida wa dōmo gochisō-sama deshita.

こないだはどうもごちそうさまでした。

Thank you for the meal/drinks the other day.

The standard reply to either of the above phrases is:

• Kochira koso, arigato gozaimashita.

こちらこそ、ありがどうございました。

On the contrary, let me thank you.

If you haven’t seen the person for a while you would say:

• Shibaraku. しばらく。 It’s been a long time.

Or more politely,

• O-hisashiburi desu / Shibaraku-buri desu ne.

お久しぶりです/しばらくぶりですね。

It's been a long time.

A common response would be:

• Go-busata shite imasu.

ご無沙汰しています。

Sorry not to have been in touch.

If you meet someone important to you—for example, if you meet your child’s teacher or you meet a client, your follow-up words would be:

• Itsumo o-sewa ni natte imasu.

いつもお世話になっています。

I am continually in your favor.

Or you could follow up the greeting with an enquiry into their health or their business.

• Genki? / O-genki desu ka? / O-kawari nai desu ka?

元気？ /お元気ですか？ /お変わりないですか？

You well? / Are you well? / No change? (in your health)

• O-isogashii desu ka? / Keiki wa dō desu ka?

お忙しいですか？ /景気はどうですか？

Are you busy? / How’s business?

You would respond with one of these:

• Mā-mā desu ne. / Hai, o-kagesama de.

まあまあですね。/はい、お力、げさまで。

Not bad. / Fine, thank you (lit. thanks to you).

Osaka businessmen greet each other with Mōkarimakka? 儲かりまっか？ (lit. Making money?). The standard reply is bochi-bochi ぼちぼち or botsu-botsu ぼつぼつ both meaning “a bit at a time”.

Dōmo/Dōmo dōmo

どうも/どうもどうも

Thanks

This is an all-encompassing expression of thanks and apology widely used, especially by men. It can be combined with almost any of the other set expressions in this chapter, e.g. Dōmo, konnichi wa どうもこんにちは and Dōmo, o-hisashiburi どうも、お久しぶり.

1.03 Commenting on the Weather kisetsu no aisatsu 季節の挨拶

To get the conversation going, you can always say something about the weather. Here’s a selection that should get you through most days.

• Samui desu ne

寒いですね。

It’s cold, isn’t it?

• Futte kimashita ne

降ってきましたね。

It’s started to rain, hasn’t it?

• Haremashita ne

隋れましたね。

It’s cleared up, hasn’t it?

• Uttōshii tenki desu ne

うっとうしい天気ですね。

It’s dreary weather, isn’t it?

• Atatakaku narimashita ne

暖かくなりましたね。

It’s really warming up, isn’t it?

• li o-tenki desu ne

良いお天気ですね。

It’s beautiful weather, isn’t it?

• Atsukute, taihen desu ne

暑くてたいへんですね。

It’s awfully hot, isn’t it?

• Mushi-atsui desu ne

蒸し暑いですね。

It’s hot and humid, isn’t it?

• Ijō kishō desu ne

異常気象ですね。

This is abnormal weather, isn’t it?

1.04 Being Introduced shōkai 紹介

When meeting someone for the first time, most people use the following set expression:

• Hajimemashite. Dōzo yoroshiku o-negai shimasu.

はじめまして。どうぞよろしくお願いします。

How do you do? Pleased to meet you.

This expression points out that it is a first-time meeting and then asks for the other person’s favorable consideration. The standard reply is:

• Kochira koso. Dōzo yoroshiku.

こちらこそ。どうぞよろしく。

The pleasure’s mine. Glad to meet you.

1.05 Saying Goodbye wakareru 別れる

Sayōnara

さようなら

Goodbye (lit. If it must be so)

Unfortunately, this famous and romantic farewell is not used so much. Although schoolchildren are taught to say Sayōnara to their teachers at the end of the school day, adults don’t usually use it in ordinary situations. Sayōnara is mostly used between friends when they are parting for a long time; for example, when they are seeing someone off who is moving away.

Shitsurei shimashita

失ネししました

Goodbye (lit. I have imposed)

This polite phrase is used in business situations, at social gatherings, or when leaving someone’s home.

Mata ne! またね Ja ne! じやね See you! Bye!

This is how friends say goodbye. Variations include Mataashita また明曰 See you tomorrow; Mata raishū Iまた来週 See you next week; and じや一また. Ja mata.

Baibai ハイハイ Bye-bye

Used by young people, especially children.

Gochisō-sama deshita ごちそうさまでした

Thank you. It was delicious

You say this as soon as you’ve finished eating but it’s often repeated when saying goodbye to someone who has treated you to a meal (or even to just a cup of tea). You can also say it to restaurant staff when leaving the premises.

O-yasumi-nasai おやすみなさい

Good night

Frequently used also on the phone, this is how friends and family say good night. It’s not used, however, when you leave work; it would imply that those remaining at the office would sleep there until morning! Use O-saki ni instead.

O-saki ni お先に

Goodbye (lit. Excuse me for going ahead of you)

This expression (the more polite form is O-saki ni shitsurei shimasu お先に失礼します) is used when leaving a group of friends or colleagues. The appropriate response in work situations would be O-tsukare-sama deshita お疲れ様でした Goodbye. Thank you for your help.

Itte kimasu ネ亍ってきます

Goodbye. I’m off! (lit. I’ll go and come back)

This phrase, whose more polite form is Itte mairimasu 行ってまいります, is used when leaving home. It’s also used during working hours when people temporarily leave their offices. The appropriate response by those remaining would be Itte’ rasshai 行ってら っしやい, (lit. Go and come back).

O-daiji ni お大事に

Take care of your health

This friendly phrase is used when taking leave of the elderly or of someone who is sick or injured.

Go-kigen yō ごきげんよう

Farewell

This can sound either refined or affected depending on the circumstances. Although people rarely say this, it’s occasionally still heard at the end of television shows.

Ja, ki o tsukete じや、気をつけて

Take care

This casual farewell phrase is used between friends. More polite, but still friendly, equivalents are O-ki o tsukete お気をつけて and O-genki de お元気で.

1.06 Expressing Gratitude kansha 感謝

There are several ways to say “thank you”, from informal to very polite. They are:

Arigatō ありがどう

Dōmo arigatō どうもありがどう

Arigatō gozaimasu ありがどうございます, and

Dōmo arigatō gozaimasu どうもありがどうございます.

You can also use the past tense gozaimashita. As a general rule, when the action is happening or will happen, say Arigatō gozaimasu, for example, when you are being handed a present. When the action is completed, say Arigatō gozaimashita, for example, when you have received a present in the mail and are thanking the sender by phone. An appropriate response is Dō itashimashite どういたし まして You’re welcome, or Kochira koso こちらこそ On the contrary, let me thank you.

Sumimasen すみません

Thank you

This is an apology but is often used to thank someone when you’ve put them to some trouble. Similar expressions include: O-tesū o kakemashita お手数を掛けました and ご迷惑をかけました Go-meiwaku o kakemashita. In response, say Dō itashimashite どういたしまして You’re welcome, or O-kamai naku おかまいなく No worries.

O-sewa ni narimashita お世話になりました

I’m obliged to you

This is the best way to thank someone who has spent time helping you. When you want to thank someone who has shown you around, say something like:

• O-sewa ni narimashita. Go-annai itadaite, yokatta desu.

お世話になりました。ご案内いただいて、よかったです。

Thank you very much for all your kindness. It was great having you take us around.

Tasukarimashita 助かりました

You’ve been a great help

If someone has helped you with a translation, you can thank them like this:

• O-kage-sama de shimekiri ni ma-ni-atte, tasukarima shita.

おかげさまで締め切りに間に合って、助かりました。

Thanks to you I made the deadline. You were a great help.

Go-kurō-sama ご苦労様

Thank you for your help

This is a traditional phrase expressing appreciation to someone who has finished working. You can use it to thank someone who’s done a job or service for you. It may be inappropriate when addressing superiors and you might be better off using O-tsukare-sama instead.

O-tsukare-sama お疲れ様

Thank you for your help/work

Originating in the entertainment world this is now interchangeable with Go-kurō-sama, and perhaps more widely used. When a colleague leaves the office to go home and says O-saki ni お先に, respond with O-tsukare-sama.

Kyōshuku desu 恐縮です Osoreiremasu 恐れ入れます

I am very grateful

The literal meaning of these phrases is “I shrink with fear (in the face of your great kindness)”. If someone has unexpectedly done something nice to you, you can offer thanks by saying:

• Sorewa sorewa, dōmo, kyōshuku desu.

それはそれはどうも。恐縮です。

This really is too much. Thank you.

Itadakimasu いただきます

Thank you (lit. I receive)

Everyone says this before starting a meal or snack. Itadakimasu is the humble form of the verb morau, to receive, and is used extensively in respect language.

Gochisō-sama deshita ごちそうさまでした

Thank you (lit. It was a feast)

This is how you say “thank you” when finishing a meal or snack.

1.07 A Few Notes on Respect Language keigo 敬語

Although respect language is a vestige of feudal hierarchy, its function today is not to emphasize differences in status but more to facilitate relationships. It is used most often in business, on formal occasions, and when meeting people for the first time.

For the vast majority of everyday situations, the –masu form of the verb which shows respect to the person you are talking to, is sufficiently polite. So, if you want to ask your girlfriend what time she’s going out, you might say Itsu dekakeru no? いつ出かけるの？ but to ask her father when he is going out, you would say Itsu dekakemasu ka? いつ出かけますか

Polite forms of words, such as ikaga instead of dō, meaning “how”, and dochira instead of dare meaning “who” make speech sound more refined. You’ll find that speech is quite formal in business situations and these polite words are often used to add gravitas to the speech (see the chapter on Business).

The heart of respect language, however, lies in the verbs. They work on a see-saw principle. Humble verbs, referring to yourself, lower your position vis-à-vis the other person whereas honorific verbs referring to others, raise their status relative to yours. We’ve already met o-negai shimasu which is the humble form of negaimasu (to request). Most regular verbs follow certain rules but, as in most languages, the most common verbs are exceptions. Fortunately there are only a handful of these to learn. The verb “to go” iku, for example, has the humble form mairu and the honorific form irassharu. So you might say:

• Kore kara mihonichi e mairimasu ga, go-issho ni irasshaimasen ka?

これから見本市へ参ります力\ご一緒にいらっしゃいませ ん力、。

We (humble, mairu) are going on to the trade fair. Won’t you (honorific irassharu) go with us?

Take a look at the list at the end of the book for the special forms of these verbs and for an explanation of the use of the passive tense which is also used to show respect and which you will hear frequently.

It gets a bit tricky when you’re talking about someone else. For example, when a member of staff wants to say to a colleague that the boss is out, they might say Shacho wa irasshaimasen (社長はいらっ しゃいません) , using the honorific form irassharu about the boss. But when speaking to a visitor they would say, Shacho wa orimasen (社長 はおりません), using the humble form oru. Within the company, the president is referred to with respectful speech, but outside the company, with humble speech. When talking to outsiders, use respectful speech about them, their boss, and their children, and humble speech about yourself, your boss and your organization.

1.08 Apologizing ayamaru 謝る

A first reaction in many situations is to apologize. All apologies should be accompanied by bows, or at least a nod of the head.

Sumimasen すみません

I’m sorry.

Besides being the most widely used apology, this is also used to attract attention and to express thanks. The polite form is Dōmo sumimasen deshita どうもすみませんでした.

Shitsurei shimashita 失ネししました

I’m sorry

This is recommended for business situations. If you accidentally interrupt your boss when he has a visitor, you can say:

• A, shitsurei shimashita. Mata kimasu.

了、失礼しました。また来ます。

Oh, I’m sorry. I’ll come back later.

Mōshiwake arimasen 申し訳ありません

I’m very sorry (lit. There is no excuse)

This is even more polite.

O-matase shimashita お待たせしました

Sorry to have kept you waiting

A courteous way to apologize to someone who has been kept waiting. Used frequently on the phone.

Gomen-nasai ごめんなさい

Sorry

Repentant children bow their heads and say this when they’ve done wrong. Since by itself it can sound too familiar, you might want to follow it with more apologies. For example:

• Gomen-nasai. Sumimasen deshita. Daijōbu desu ka? ごめんなさい。すみませんでした。大丈夫ですか。

Oh, pardon. I’m sorry. Are you all right?

1.09 Asking Permission yurushi o eru 許しを得る

A simple way to ask permission is to use the - te (or - de) form of a verb and attach ii desu ka ? Adding mo after the verb adds emphasis to the request.

• Haitte (mo) ii desu ka? 入って(も)いいですか。

May I come in?

If a situation requires tact, you might want to use a rather complicated construction the literal meaning of which is: “May I receive from you …”, using the verb morau (もらう) to receive. For example:

• Ashita yasumasete moraemasu ka?

あした休ませてもらえます力、。

Could I please have tomorrow off? (lit. Could I receive you having caused me to take time off?)

You can make this more polite by using itadaku (いただく) instead of morau (もらう). And when you need to choose your words very carefully, instead of asking directly, you can say you would like to receive but …

• Ashita yasumasete itadakitai no desu ga.

あした休ませていただきたいのですが。

Could you possibly let me have tomorrow off?

This is humble because of the causative yasumasete, polite because of the humble itadakitai, and softened because of the desu ga … No one will be able to withhold their permission in the face of such politeness!

1.10 Making Requests

o-negai お願い

This is the most common and widely used expression. You will hear it all the time.

• Yoroshiku o-negai shimasu/itashimasu.

よろしくお願いします/いたします。

Please. (lit. I request.)

When asking for someone on the phone, say, for example:

• Yamada-san, o-negai shimasu.

山田さん、お願いします。

Mr Yamada, please.

Kudasai 下さい

Please

Generally speaking, this is used in two ways. When it follows a noun, kudasai means “give (me)”.

• Kyo no ranchi kudasai.

今日のランチ，下さい。

May I have today’s lunch?

When used after the - te form of a verb, kudasai means “Please”.

• Ashita kite kudasai.

あした来てください。

Please come tomorrow.

If you wish to be more polite, replace kudasai with kudasaimasen ka ?

• Nihongo o oshiete kudasaimasen ka?

日本語を教えてくださいませんか。

Would you please teach me Japanese?

The two verbs meaning to receive, morau (もらう) and the politer itadaku (いただく), are widely used when making requests. Negative forms of these verbs make the request more polite.

• Chotto matte itadakemasu ka?

ちょっと待っていただけますか。

Would you mind waiting a moment?

• Sumimasen. Kore o dokete moraemasen ka.

すみません。これをどけてもらえません力、。

Excuse me. Would you mind moving this?

1.11 Leading up to a Request

Rather than abruptly making a request, you might prepare the listener for what is to follow by starting with one of these phrases.

• Ashita no kaigi no koto nan desu ga,

明日の会議のこどなんですが、

About tomorrow’s meeting,

• Jitsu wa, o-negai ga atte, o-denwa shita wake nan’ desu ga,

実は、お願いがあって、お電話したわけなんですが、

I phoned because there was something I wanted to ask you,

• O-isogashii tokoro, sumimasen.

お忙しいどころすみません。

I’m sorry to disturb you when you’re busy.

1.12 Refusing Requests kotowaru 断る

Although refusals should be made discreetly, it is important to make it clear whether you are refusing or accepting. At the first hint of something undesirable, you might want to make a remark such as:

• So desu ne …

そうですね。

Well...

When the request comes, it is often enough to say:

• Sā, chottto …

さ一、ちょっと、

Well, it’s just that...

When spoken hesitantly, with pauses before and after the chotto, either of the phrases below should convey your desire not to partake.

• Konogoro, chotto, shigoto ga isogashikute,

このごろ、ちょっと、仕事が忙しくて、

I’m rather busy at work these days.

• Saikin, chotto, taichō o kuzushimashite,

最近、ちょっと、体調を崩しまして、

I’ve really not been feeling well recently.

If you cannot think of a specific reason, you could play for time:

• Chotto sōdan shite, mata o-denwa shimasu.

ちょっと相談して、またお電話します。

I’ll discuss it (with someone) and call you back.

• Chotto kangaesasete kudasai. Daiji na koto desu kara.

ちょっと考えさせてください。大事なこどですから。

Please let me think it over. It’s such an important matter.

Obviously, specific excuses make convincing refusals:

• Sumimasen ga, kyūyō ga dekimashita no de.

すみません力\急用ができましたので。

I’m sorry, but something urgent has come up.

• Zannen desu ga, hatsuka wa tsugō ga warui no desu ga.

残念ですが、二十日は都合が悪いのですが。

I’m afraid I’m not free on the twentieth.

• Hidoi kaze o hiite shimatte, utsuru to ikenai desu kara.

ひどい風邪を引いてしまって、うつるどいけないですから。

I’ve got a terrible cold. I wouldn’t like you to get it.

In cases when your reasons still do not convince the listener, you can try one of these statements:

• Mōshi-wake arimasen ga, konkai wa o-yaku ni tatema sen no de.

申し訳ありません力\今回はお役に立てませんので。

I’m sorry but I can’t help you this time.

• Zannen desu ga, kondo wa enryo sasete itadakimasu.

残念ですが、今度は遠慮させていただきます。

I’m sorry but I’ll forgo it this time.

• Demo komarimasu.

でも困ります。

But that would put me in a bind.

On the other side of the coin, you may fall victim to a reluctance to give a direct refusal. There is a tendency to stress the positive “I really would like to go” and not the negative “but I can’t.” For example, the following phrase, depending on the context, might be a well-meaning delaying tactic:

• Maemuki ni kentō sasete itadakitai to kangaemasu.

前向きに検討させていただきたいど考えます。

We will consider it constructively.

The oblique phrase and hesitant tone may well signal that the situation is difficult. One must learn to read between the lines.