Читать книгу Beaumont and Fletcher's Works. Volume 9 - Beaumont Francis - Страница 4

Lam.

Oh! What a tempest have I in my stomach!

How my empty guts cry out! my wounds ake,

Would they would bleed again, that I might get

Something to quench my thirst.

Fran. O Lamure, the happiness my dogs had

When I kept house at home! they had a storehouse,

A storehouse of most blessed bones and crusts,

Happy crusts: Oh! how sharp hunger pinches me!

Mor. O my importunate belly, I have nothing

To satisfie thee; I have sought,

As far as my weak legs would carry me,

Yet can find nothing: neither meat nor water;

Nor any thing that's nourishing,

My bellies grown together like an empty sachel.

Lam. How now, What news?

Mor. Hast any meat yet?

Fran. Not a bit that I can see;

Here be goodly quarries, but they be cruel hard

To gnaw: I ha got some mud, we'll eat it with spoons,

Very good thick mud: but it stinks damnably;

There's old rotten trunks of Trees too,

But not a leafe nor blossome in all the Island.

Lam. How it looks!

Mor. It stinks too.

Lam. It may be poyson.

Fran. Let it be any thing;

So I can get it down: Why Man,

Poyson's a Princely dish.

Mor. Hast thou no Bisket?

No crumbs left in thy pocket: here's my dublet,

Give me but three small crumbes.

Fran. Not for three Kingdoms,

If I were master of 'em: Oh Lamure,

But one poor joynt of Mutton: we ha scorn'd (Man).

Lam. Thou speak'st of Paradis.

[Fran.] Or but the snuffes of those healths,

We have lewdly at midnight flang away.

Mor. Ah! but to lick the Glasses.

Fran. Here comes the Surgeon: What

Hast thou discover'd? smile, smile, and comfort us.

Sur. I am expiring;

Smile they that can: I can find nothing Gentlemen,

Here's nothing can be meat, without a miracle.

Oh that I had my boxes, and my lints now,

My stupes, my tents, and those sweet helps of nature,

What dainty dishes could I make of 'em.

Mor. Hast ne'er an old suppository?

Sur. Oh would I had Sir.

Lam. Or, but the paper where such a Cordial

Potion, or Pills hath been entomb'd.

Fran. Or the best bladder where a cooling-glister.

Mor. Hast thou no searcloths left?

Nor any old pultesses?

Fran. We care not to what it hath been ministred.

Sur. Sure I have none of these dainties Gentlemen.

Fran. Where's the great Wen

Thou cut'st from Hugh the saylers shoulder?

That would serve now for a most Princely banquet.

Sur. I, if we had it Gentlemen.

I flung it over-board, slave that I was.

Lam. A most unprovident villain.

Sur. If I had any thing that were but supple now!

I could make Sallads of your shoos Gentlemen,

And rare ones: any thing unctious.

Mor. I, and then we might fry the soals i'th' Sun.

The soals would make a second dish.

Lam. Or, souce 'em in the salt-water,

An inner soal well souc'd.

Fran. Here comes the Woman;

It may be she has meat, and may relieve us,

Let's withdraw, and mark, and then be ready,

She'll hide her store else, and so cozen us.

Amin. How weary, and how hungry am I,

How feeble, and how faint is all my body!

Mine eyes like spent Lamps glowing out, grow heavy,

My sight forsaking me, and all my spirits,

As if they heard my passing bell go for me,

Pull in their powers, and give me up to destiny,

Oh! for a little water: a little, little meat,

A little to relieve me ere I perish:

I had whole floods of tears awhile that nourisht me,

But they are all consum'd for thee dear Albert;

For thee they are spent, for thou art dead;

Merciless fate has swallow'd thee.

Oh – I grow heavy: sleep is a salve for misery;

Heaven look on me, and either take my life,

Or make me once more happy.

Lam. Shee's fast asleep already,

Why should she have this blessing, and we wake still,

Wake to our wants?

Mor. This thing hath been our overthrow,

And all these biting mischiefs that fall on us

Are come through her means.

Fran. True, we were bound ye all know,

For happy places, and most fertile Islands,

Where we had constant promises of all things,

She turn'd the Captains mind,

And must have him go in search, I know not of who,

Nor to what end: of such a fool her brother,

And such a coxcomb her kinsman, and we must put in every where,

She has put us in now yfaith.

Lam. Why should we consume thus, and starve,

Have nothing to relieve us;

And she live there that bred all our miseries,

Unrosted, or unsod?

Mor. I have read in stories.

Lam. Of such restoring meates,

We have examples;

Thousand examples, and allow'd for excellent;

Women that have eate their Children,

Men their slaves, nay their brothers: but these are nothing;

Husbands devoured their Wives: (th[ey] are their Chattels,)

And of a Schoolmaster, that in a time of famine,

Powdered up all his Scholars.

Mor. Shee's young and tydie,

In my conscience she'll eat delicately;

Just like young Pork a little lean,

Your opinion Surgeon.

Sur. I think she may be made good meat,

But look we shall want Salt.

Fran. Tush, she needs no powdering.

Sur. I grant ye;

But to suck out the humorous parts: by all means,

Lets kill her in a chafe, she'll eat the sweeter.

Lam. Let's kill her any way: and kill her quickly,

That we might be at our meat.

Sur. How if the Captain?

Mor. Talk not of him, he's dead, and the rest famish'd.

Wake her Surgeon, and cut her throat,

And then divide her, every Man his share.

Fran. She wakes her self.

Amin. Holy and good things keep me!

What cruel dreams have I had! Who are these?

O they are my friends; for heavens sake Gentlemen

Give me some food to save my life: if ye have ought to spare;

A little to relieve me: I may bless ye;

For weak and wretched, ready to perish,

Even now I die.

Mor. You'll save a labor then,

You bred these miseries, and you shall pay for't;

We have no meat, nor where to have we know not,

Nor how to pull our selves from these afflictions,

We are starv'd too, famisht, all our hopes deluded;

Yet ere we die thus, wee'll have one dainty meal.

Amin. Shall I be with ye Gentlemen?

Lam. Yes mary shall ye: in our bellies Lady.

We love you well —

Amin. What said you Sir?

Lam. Mary wee'll eat your Ladiship.

Fran. You that have buried us in this base Island,

Wee'll bury ye in a more noble Monument.

Sur. Will ye say your prayers, that I may perform Lady?

We are wondrous sharp set; come Gentlemen,

Who are for the hinder parts?

Mor. I.

Fran. I.

Lam. And I.

Sur. Be patient;

They will not fall to every Man's share.

Amin. O hear me;

Hear me ye barbarous men.

Mor. Be short and pithy,

Our stomachs cannot stay a long discourse.

Sur. And be not fearful,

For I'll kill ye daintily.

Amin. Are ye not Christians?

Lam. Why, do not Christians eat Women?

Amin. Eat one another? 'tis most impious.

Sur. Come, come.

Amin. Oh, help, help, help.

Tib. The Ladies voice! stand off slaves,

What do you intend villains?

I have strength enough left me, if you abuse this soul,

To —

Ma. They would have ravisht her upon my life,

Speak, how was it Lady?

Amin. Forgive 'em, 'twas their hungers.

Tib. Ha, their hungers!

Ma. They would have eaten her.

Tib. O dam'd villains; speak, Is it true?

Sur. I confess an appetite.

Tib. An appetite, I'll fit ye for an appetite.

Are ye so sharp set, that her flesh must serve you?

Murther's a main good service with your Worships;

Since ye would be such Devils,

Why did you not begin with one another handsomly,

And spare the Woman to beget more food on?

Amin. Good Sir.

Tib. You shall grow mummy rascals;

I'll make you fall to your brawns, and your buttocks,

And worry one another like keen bandogs.

Amin. Good Sir be merciful.

Tib. You shall know what 'tis to be damn'd, Canibals.

Amin. O my best friend!

Al. Alas poor heart! here,

Here's some meat and sovereign drink to ease you,

Sit down gentle Sweet.

Amin. I am blest to see you.

Tib. Stir not within forty foot of this food,

If you do dogs!

All. Oh, Captain, Captain, Captain.

Alb. Ye shall have meat all of you.

Tib. Captain, hear me first: hark,

'Tis so inhumane! I would not ha the air corrupted with it.

Alb. O barbarous men! sit down Du-pont,

Good Master, and honest Saylors.

Tib. But stand you off,

And waite upon our charity; I'll wait on you else;

And touch nothing but what's flung ye; as if you were dogs;

If you do, I'll cut your fingers; friends,

I'll spoil your carving.

Amin. There wretches, there.

Tib. Eat your meat handsomely now,

And give Heaven thanks.

Alb. There's more bread.

Tib. See, they snarle like dogs;

Eat quietly you Rascals, eat quietly.

Alb. There is drink too.

Tib. Come, come, I'll fill you each your cups,

Ye shall not surfet.

Amin. And what have you discover'd?

Alb. Sweet, a paradise,

A paradise inhabited with Angels,

Such as you are: their pitties make 'm Angels,

They gave me these viands, and supply'd me

With these pretious drinks.

Amin. Shall not we see 'em?

Alb. Yes, they will see you

Out of their charities, having heard our story,

They will come, and comfort us, come presently;

We shall no more know wants nor miseries.

Amin. Are they all women?

Alb. All, and all in love with us.

Amin. How!

Alb. Do not mistake: in love with our misfortunes,

They will cherish and relieve our men.

Tib. Do you shrug now,

And pull up your noses? you smell comfort,

See they stretch out their Legs like Dottrels,

Each like a new Saint Dennis.

Alb. Dear Mistris,

When you would name me, and the women hear,

Call me your brother, you I'll call my sister,

And pray observe this all —

Why do you change color sweet.

Amin. Eating too much meat.

Alb. Sawc't with jealousie;

Fie, fie, dear saint, yfaith ye are too blame,

Are ye not here? here fixt in my heart?

All. Hark, hark;

Alb. They are come, stand ready, and look nobly,

And with all humble reverence receive 'em,

Our lives depend upon their gentle pitties,

And death waits on their anger.

Mor. Sure they are Fairies.

Tib. Be they Devils: Devils of flesh and blood;

After so long a Lent, and tedious voyage,

To me they are Angels.

Fran. O for some Eringoes!

Lam. Potatoes, or Cantharides.

Tib. Peace you Rogues, that buy abilities of your 'pothecaries,

Had I but took the diet of green Cheese,

And Onions for a month, I could do wonders.

Ros. Are these the Jewels you run mad for?

What can you see in one of these,

To whom you would vouchsafe a gentle touch?

Can nothing perswade you

To love your selves, and place your happiness

In cold and chast embraces of each other.

Ju. This is from the purpose.

Hip. We had your grant to have them as they were.

Cla. 'Tis a beauteous Creature,

And to my self, I do appear deform'd,

When I consider her, and yet she is

The strangers sister; Why then should I fear?

She cannot prove my rival.

Ros. When you repent,

That you refus'd my counsel, may it add

To your afflictions, that you were forward;

Yet leap'd into the Gulfe of your misfortunes,

But have your wishes.

Mast. Now she makes to us.

Amin. I am instructed, but take heed Albert,

You prove not false.

Alb. Ye are your own assurance,

And so acquainted with your own perfections,

That weak doubts cannot reach you; therefore fear not.

Ros. That you are poor and miserable men,

My eyes inform me: that without our succors,

Hope cannot flatter you to dream of safety;

The present plight you are in, can resolve you

That to be merciful, is to draw near

The Heavenly essence: whether you will be

Thankful, I do not question; nor demand

What country bred you, what names, what maners;

To us it is sufficient we relieve

Such as have shapes of men: and I command you,

As we are not ambitious to know

Farther of you, that on pain of death

You presume not to enquire what we are,

Or whence deriv'd.

Alb. In all things we obey you,

And thankfully we ever shall confess

Our selves your creatures.

Ros. You speak as becomes you;

First then, and willingly, deliver up

Those weapons we could force from you.

Alb. We lay 'em down

Most gladly at your feet.

Tib. I have had many a combat with a tall wench;

But never was disarm'd before.

Ros. And now hear comfort,

Your wants shall be supply'd, and though it be

A debt women may challenge to be sued to,

Especially from such they may command;

We give up to you that power, and therefore

Freely each make his choice.

Fran. Then here I fix.

Mor. Nay, she is mine: I eyed her first.

Lam. This mine.

Tib. Stay good rascals;

You are too forward, sir Gallant,

You are not giving order to a Taylor

For the fashion of a new suit;

Nor are you in your warehouse, master Merchant,

Stand back, and give your betters leave: your betters;

And grumble not: if ye do, as I love meat

I will so swinge the salt itch out on you.

Captain, Master, and the rest of us,

That are brothers, and good fellows: we have been

Too late by the ears: and yet smart for our follies;

To end therefore all future emulation: if you please,

To trust to my election, you shall say,

I am not partial to my self; I doubt not

Give content to all.

All. Agreed, agreed.

Tib. Then but observe, how learned and discreetly,

I will proceed, and as a skilful Doctor

In all the quirks belonging to the game;

Read over your complexions: for you Captain

Being first in place, and therefore first to be serv'd,

I give my judgment thus, for your aspect,

Y'are much inclin'd to melancholy: and that tells me,

The sullen Saturne had predominance

At your nativity, a malignant Planet,

And if not qualified by a sweet conjunction

Of a soft and ruddy wench, born under Venus,

It may prove fatal: therefore to your armes,

I give this rose-cheekt Virgin.

Cla. To my wish;

Till now I never was happy.

Amin. Nor I accurs'd.

Tib. Master, you are old;

Yet love the game, that I perceive too,

And if not well spurr'd up, you may prove rusty;

Therefore to help ye here's a Bradamanta,

Or I am cosen'd in my calculation.

Cro. A poor old man alloted to my share.

Ti. Thou wouldst have two;

Nay, I think twenty: but fear not wench,

Though he be old he's tough: look on's making,

Hee'll not fail I warrant thee.

Ros. A merry fellow,

And were not man a creature I detest,

I could indure his company.

Ti. Here's a fair heard of Does before me,

And now for a barren one:

For, though I like the sport: I do not love

To Father children: like the Grand Signior,

Thus I walk in my Seraglio,

And view 'em as I pass: then draw I forth

My handkercher, and having made my choice,

I thus bestow it.

Ros. On me.

Ti. On you: now my choice is made;

To it you hungry Rascals.

Alb. Excellent.

Amin. As I love goodness,

It makes me smile i'th' height of all my fears.

Cla. What a strong contention you may behold

Between my Mothers mirth and anger.

Tib. Nay, no coyness: be Mistriss of your word,

I must, and will enjoy you.

Ros. Be advis'd fool: alas I am old;

How canst thou hope content from one that's fifty.

Ti. Never talk on't;

I have known good ones at threescore and upwards;

Besides the weathers hot: and men

That have experience, fear Fevers:

A temperate diet is the onely Physick,

Your Julips, nor Guajacum prunello's,

Camphire pills, nor Goord-water,

Come not near your old Woman;

Youthful stomachs are still craving,

Though there be nothing left to stop their mouths with;

And believe me I am no frequent giver of those bounties:

Laugh on: laugh on: good Gentlemen do,

I shall make holiday and sleep, when you

Dig in the mines till your hearts ake.

Ros. A mad fellow;

[Well,] Sir, I'll give you hearing: and as I like

Your wooing, and discourse: but I must tell ye Sir,

That rich Widows look for great sums in present,

Or assurances of ample Joynters.

Ti. That to me is easie,

For instantly I'll do it, hear me comrades.

Alb. What say'st thou Tibalt?

Tib. Why, that to woo a Wench with empty hands

Is no good Heraldry, therefore let's to the gold,

And share it equally: 'twill speak for us

More than a thousand complements or cringes,

Ditties stolen from Petrarch, or Discourse from Ovid,

Besides, 'twill beget us respect,

And if ever fortune friend us with a Barque,

Largely supply us with all provision.

Alb. Well advis'd, defer it not.

Ti. Are ye all contented.

All. We are!

Ti. Lets away then,

Strait wee'll return,

And you shall see our riches.

Ros. Since I knew what wonder and amazement was,

I nee'r was so transported.

Cla. Why weep ye gentle Maid?

There is no danger here to such as you;

Banish fear: for with us I dare promise,

You shall meet all courteous entertainment.

Cro. We esteem our selves most happy in you.

Hip. And bless fortune that brought you hither.

Cla. Hark in your ear;

I love you as a friend already,

Ere long you shall call me by a nearer name,

I wish your brother well: I know you apprehend me.

Amin. I, to my grief I do;

Alas good Ladies, there is nothing left me,

But thanks, to pay ye with.

Clar. That's more,

Than yet you stand ingag'd for.

Ros. So soon return'd!

Alb. Here: see the Idol of the Lapidary.

Ti. These Pearls, for which the slavish Negro

Dives to the bottom of the Sea.

Lam. To get which the industrious Merchant

Touches at either pole.

Fran. The never-fayling purchase

Of Lordships, and of honors.

Mor. The Worlds Mistriss,

That can give every thing to the possessors.

Ma. For which the Saylors scorn tempestuous Winds.

And spit defiance in the Sea.

Ti. Speak Lady: Look we not lovely now?

Ros. Yes, yes, O my Stars,

Be now for ever blest, that have brought

To my revenge these Robbers; take your arrowes,

And nayl these Monsters to the earth.

Alb. What mean ye Lady?

In what have we offended?

Ros. O my daughter!

And you companions with me in all fortunes,

Look on these Caskets, and these Jewels,

These were our own, when first we put to Sea

With good Sebastian: and these the Pyrats

That not alone depriv'd him of this treasure,

But also took his life.

Cro. Part of my present

I will remember was mine own.

Hip. And these were mine.

Ju. Sure, I have worn this Jewel.

Ros. Wherefore do ye stay then,

And not perform my command?

Al. O Heaven!

What cruel fate pursues us.

Ti. I am well enough serv'd,

That must be off'ring Joyntures, Jewels,

And precious stones, more than I brought with me.

Ros. Why shoot ye not?

Cla. Hear me dear Mother;

And when the greatest cruelty, is Justice,

Do not shew mercy: death to these starv'd wretches

Is a reward, not punishment: let 'em live

To undergoe the full weight of your displeasure.

And that they may have sence to feel the torments

They have deserv'd: allow 'em some small pittance,

To linger out their tortures.

Ros. 'Tis well counsell'd.

All. And wee'll follow it.

Alb. Hear us speak.

Ros. Peace dogs.

Bind 'em fast: when fury hath given way to reason,

I will determine of their sufferings,

Which shall be horrid. Vengeance, though slow pac'd,

At length o'rtakes the guilty; and the wrath

Of the incensed powers, will fall most sure

On wicked men, when they are most secure.