Читать книгу The Complete Confessions of a GP - Benjamin Daniels - Страница 32

Small talk

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Drew was a very good-looking guy. He was in his early twenties with big muscles, perfectly chiselled features, blonde hair, blue eyes and a probably fake but nonetheless healthy-looking tan.

‘I’ve got a painful testicle, Doctor. Wondered if you’d have a look at it.’

I was the only male doctor to have worked at this practice for over a year and my first few days were spent seeing a queue of relieved men worried about their genitalia. Some had been worried about their ‘bits’ for months but had been too embarrassed to expose themselves to one of the female doctors.

So there I was, gently rolling Drew’s testes between my fingers, looking for lumps. It can be a slightly uncomfortable situation for the patient in every sense of the word, so I decided to try to make a bit of small talk to put him at ease.

‘So Drew, what do you do for a living?’

‘I’m a film actor.’

‘I thought you looked familiar. Have you been in anything I might have seen?’

‘That depends, Dr Daniels, I only really do gay porn.’

‘Ah, probably not then, no. You … erm … must have one of those familiar-looking faces I guess. Definitely wouldn’t have seen you in a film. Nothing against porn or anything, except the degradation of women and all that … well, not many women in your films, I should imagine …’

There was now only one person in the room who was uncomfortable and it wasn’t Drew. I really should remember to limit my small talk topics to the weather and city centre parking problems.

The Complete Confessions of a GP

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