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You need not feel guilty about not being able to keep your life perfectly balanced. Juggling everything is too difficult. All you really need to do is catch it before it hits the floor! ~Carol Bartz, CEO. Yahoo

Before we begin learning about the 7 Strategies to take your life from chaos to calm, I would like to share with you why I have developed passion for this topic. I have spent the last ten years researching, honing and incorporating these success strategies into my life.

My journey to Live Life Beyond the Laundry began back in 2002 when the stress and chaos in my life began to affect my health and the quality of my life. I knew things had to change and that it was up to me to make that happen. Thus, my journey, research and transformation began.

My family consists of my wonderful husband and three great kids. Oh, and I can’t forget our dog and cat. I worked as a sales representative and corporate sales trainer for a successful organization. I was also part of a project team implementing a significant change in the company. The responsibilities became overwhelming, resulting in stress and chaos in my life. I tried to balance (unsuccessfully) my daily expectations and responsibilities at work and home.

The stress and chaos began to take a toll. When I finally headed for home at the end of the day, I still had at least 20 things left on my work to-do list. The result was that I took work home with me in the form of busy mind syndrome (BMS) every day. This created a grouchy, edgy mom and wife. This is not how I wanted to be, but I was not in control. Stress and chaos had taken over my life. I knew I had to make a change when I began suffering from short-term memory loss.

That was the day I began reading and researching about work/life balance and organizing my life. Did you know people can successfully enjoy work and home life? I began to implement and modify work/life balance tools to meet the needs of my family. The tools worked, the short-term memory loss reversed itself, and I began to enjoy my evenings and weekends with the family.

This is how I live my life now. Every tool and strategy discussed in this book has been gradually implemented in my life. As a result of my hard work and consistent action, I have learned to shift my life from chaos to calm. Is my life calm and serene every day? NO. Is that okay? YES. See, NO is a complete sentence.

What I have learned is how to notice the signs and signals when my life is getting too chaotic and stressful. That is when a clear understanding of the 7 Strategies and tools in this book becomes extremely important. I figure out what is creating the chaos and build a strategy to shift back to calm.

I did not accomplish this overnight. It is a journey that takes daily action. As mentioned above, I occasionally slip, but I recognize the signs of stress and chaos much faster now and begin moving forward again with the use of the 7 Strategies. I sometimes refer to these as my work/life balance toolbox.

If I can make these changes, anyone can. I spent hours reading and researching this topic. You have a leg up on me; I have completed the research for you! Now it is your turn to do a little work.

First, you must understand the process and importance of making positive change in your life. During this transformation/journey, you will gain an understanding of where you currently are in your life and then identify your challenges and obstacles. Learn what is getting in your way of living life to the fullest. Then create powerful action items and goals to move yourself forward, setting milestones during the journey to celebrate your success.

Celebrating your success keeps you moving forward. Let’s face it; we all like to be rewarded for our hard work. You can achieve a happy, fulfilling life by incorporating the “Live Life Beyond the Laundry” strategies into your life. It works. I am living proof.

Don’t let excuses get in your way of happiness. I often ask people, “How are you today”? The answer 80% of the time is “so busy.” I then take it one step further and ask, “What are you so busy with”? Most people can’t answer that question. They have to think about it. We have turned into a “busy” society. Many of us equate busyness to productivity. This is so far from the truth. Busy does not equal productive. It makes you feel like you are productive but, at the end of the day, what have you really accomplished?

So what are we so busy doing?

•Laundry

•Email

•Social media

•Solving problems and issues at work and home

•Going to meetings

•Playing taxi driver to kids

•Picking up after the family

•Watching TV

•Consuming time with mommy guilt

•Thinking about all the things we should have gotten done

•And the list goes on and on, tumbling in the dryer

Many of the items listed above include technology. Wasn’t technology meant to make our lives more efficient and productive? In many aspects, it has. However, it has also become a huge time drain. Don’t get me wrong; social media and more online shopping can be fun and both serve a purpose. Who doesn’t love catching up with your friends, finding good shopping deals, all while snuggling up on your sofa under a warm, fuzzy blanket and enjoying a great cup of coffee? Sounds fantastic but, before you know it, two hours have passed and you are suddenly aware of how much you could and should have gotten done in those two hours. Thus begins the chaos.

Let’s take a different perspective to deepen our understanding of the overall effect technology has placed on our daily lives. Many of us were not born in the 1950s, but did you know that, in the 1950s, futurists predicted that by the year 2000 most people would only work 20 to 30 hours per week? This prediction was based on the evolution of machines and technology and how they would aid us both at work and at home. The futurists predicted people would have so much leisure time they would not know how to keep themselves busy. Boy, they really blew that one, didn’t they?

We all know this wealth of free time is far from the truth. Little did the futurists know that the advances in machines and technology would speed life up. We have seen our leisure time shrink and our work week increase to over 40 hours per week, just to keep up with our over-flowing inboxes and flood of electronic communication. Computers and high-speed printers can create 70 letters in just minutes, a task that used to take a secretary a couple of days to complete. Technology did not free us as once predicted; it forced us to work at its speed.

It’s time to slow down to move faster. Think about it. This is something I frequently tell myself when I start feeling a bit stressed or chaotic. This small statement, slow down to move faster, works every time.

Remember, no one else can do this for you. The choice is yours. No action, no reward. I have refined the strategies and tools over time to create the best tools for busy women. I am sharing the results of my success. The key is that you cannot just read about the tools; you must put them into action. Begin now so you can start to Live Life Beyond the Laundry today.

Experience how great life can be through the eyes of Elizabeth Tisdale. Elizabeth recently made changes in her life and she would like to share a glimpse of her crazy, busy life with you. When I first met Elizabeth, she lived a very stressful, busy life consumed with guilt, worry and chaos. She was not really enjoying her kids, job or significant other. She wanted to make some changes and live life to the fullest. She realized she had hit a point of extreme chaos and was completely overwhelmed. She needed to make some changes, and so began Elizabeth’s journey of transformation. Let’s meet Elizabeth.

Meet Elizabeth

I would like to take a few minutes to introduce myself. My name is Bizzy. Actually, my name is Elizabeth, but my friends and family call me Bizzy because it is the one word that describes my life. At first, I was annoyed by this nickname; however, I have now come to realize it fits. So I have just accepted the fate and deal with it.

To set the scene for my life, let’s fill in the details. I am married with three kids, one dog, one cat, and four goldfish. We live in a comfortable home, big enough for the five of us. We have a great yard, neighborhood and town. Sounds perfect. That is the postcard version we sell every year in our Christmas card.

Let’s rephrase and do a reality check. To set the scene for my life, let’s fill in the (non-Christmas card) details. I am the mother of three kids, four if you count my husband, and I can’t seem to quite catch up with things in life. Oh, and my kids actually have a cat, a dog and four goldfish as well, and we all know what that means—more responsibility for mom, yay!

We have a comfortable home scattered with toys and stacks of paper. I figure if the paper sits there long enough, it will become garbage. We have a great yard, the one chore my husband actually assumes responsibility for. We have great neighbors, not that I am actually sure because I don’t have any time to spend with them. My husband assures me they are awesome!

I never intended to have my life become this busy; it just happened. One day I woke up wishing I had 35 hours each day instead of 24. If I had 35 hours each day I would have time for my kids, my husband and myself. See, I just need more time, and then everything would be perfect. However, I always have this nagging feeling that I am a little behind or forgetting something.

The other feeling I have from time to time is mommy guilt. I always have good intentions to spend more time with my kids but laundry, cleaning the kitchen, work emails and errands take longer than I plan, thus cutting into my time with the kids. They seem to be getting used to it, but I know in my heart it is wrong. One time I tried to play Monopoly while checking my emails. I thought it was working fine; however, my kids did not agree. Oh, the memories I create!

I attempt to balance work and family with a really long—and I mean really long to-do list. But I still have a nagging, stressful feeling running through me. It just does not go away. I am crazy busy.

Whenever I check one item off the infamous to-do list, three more items magically appear. My ultimate goal is to conquer the day in an orderly fashion. This does not always happen; quite often the day results in some form of chaos or drama. I need to make some changes in my life before it runs me over completely.

If you think this story sounds familiar, or if you gave a little giggle inside as you read about Bizzy, you might just see a little of Bizzy in yourself. What does Bizzy do each day? Well, let’s just take a look at her typical morning and you will get the point.

A Typical Bizzy Day

5:45: Ugh, the alarm is going off already. (I am so tired… what day is it, anyway? Is it Thursday? No, it’s Tuesday.)

5:49: Roll out of bed and take the dog outside. (No matter how cold or rainy. Oh, yay, snow.)

5:58: Feed and water the dog. (I need to get one of those auto dispensers. I have to put that on my to-do list.)

6:05: Shower time. (Have to beat my teenager to the shower before she uses all the hot water. I need to buy one of those shower timers. That will teach her to take a 26-minute shower! Put that on my to-do list.)

6:12: Felt good to take a shower. Coffee time… (I love my coffee.)

6:45: Wake up the kids. Let the chaos begin! (Seriously, did I just think that about my kids?)

6:50: Make the kids breakfast. (Wish I could just throw some dry cereal on the plate. That would be just as easy as feeding the dog. Maybe they make automatic cereal feeders for kids.)

6:55: Round up backpacks, coats, shoes. (Why is this my job???)

7:05: Tell the kids to get dressed for school. (You would think they could figure that out. They do it every day.)

7:06: Run back to my room to get ready for work.

7:08: Ugh. Tell kids to get dressed again. (Seriously?)

7:09: Run back to my room to finish getting ready for work.

7:10: “Come on, kids… bathroom duty time, hair, teeth, deodorant, get it done.” (Want your friends to say you stink and have ugly hair? This is really not my problem; it’s yours.)

7:15: Did you do your bathroom duty, kids? Hair, teeth, deodorant…get it done or you are going to bed early tonight.

7:20: Finish getting ready. The bus will be here in four minutes.

7:21: Mom, I need you to sign my permission slip for the field trip. (Seriously, could she not have asked me this last night?)

7:22: Mom, I need $10 for a band t-shirt. It’s due today. (Again, why did she not ask me last night?)

7:23: Come on! You’re going to miss the bus. (Great, now I had to yell at them as they were leaving for school.)

7:24: Yes! The kids are at the bus stop.

7:28: Put the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher.

7:30: Take dog outside. (I feel so bad I yelled at the kids on their way out the door.)

7:40: On the road to work—finally!

7:55: And the work day has begun. (Why do I feel so stressed today? I really wish I had not yelled at the kids on their way out the door.)

8:00: Call from the school: “Mom, I forgot my tennis shoes for gym. Can you bring them? (Seriously?) “Sure, honey, I will bring them right away.”

8:20: Back to work.

9:00: Meeting.

10:00: Meeting.

11:00: Catch up on email.

12:00: Lunch hour. (Oh, I mean errand hour—grocery store, bank, post office.)

You get the picture. And the chaos and mommy guilt continue throughout the day. Look at all the chaos and stress created in just a mere 2 hours and 15 minutes before Bizzy even went to work. What a way to start the day! Back to Bizzy.

Whew, I made it through the work day. It would have gone a little better if I had not yelled at the kids as they left this morning. I have to hurry and get the kids picked up from after-school care; it closes in 15 minutes. I will not be that mom who is late picking up her kids.

I will be there in eight minutes and will have seven minutes to spare, so I am not one of those moms. Yay, me! Wow! Traffic is really backed up. OH?!/% A TRAIN! I did not build that into my timing. So I may be one of those moms running through the door of after-school care apologizing and making up excuses why I am late. Good thing I can blame it on the train.

Good, that was a fast train. I have made it to after-school care with one minute to spare…at least according to my clock. Hi, kids. I am so sorry I yelled at you this morning.

Who has homework? Hope it’s not too much. We have piano and football practice tonight. Oh, I forgot about supper. I am so hungry. I guess I forgot about lunch as well. Kids, what do you want from Zippy Burger tonight? Sorry, but we need to eat in the car again. (Oh, how I hate Zippy Burger).

It is so nice that football and piano overlap. I have 15 minutes to read my magazine in the car. Time to pick up the kids and rush home to finish homework. Kids, shower time, bedtime and don’t forget to brush your teeth. Oh, they are finally in bed. I am so tired. I need to start a load of laundry or there will be someone without underwear in the morning. Who needs that drama?

Flop! Finally I can go to bed. I wonder what I forgot to do. That big project at work is not going so well. Tomorrow I am not going to yell at the kids on their way out the door. I wonder if someone fed the dog. I really need to go to sleep. I am tired. How are we going to make it to football, conferences and dance all at the same time tomorrow? I really need some sleep.

BBBBBBZZZZZZZ! (*%&#) That alarm gets earlier every morning. Oh, guess I was wrong. It is 5:45. I really need to get up a little earlier and go for a walk in the morning. Whatever, I need the sleep.

I am so tired of being this busy. I want to read a book or get a pedicure or watch a movie I like. But my kids and work must come first. It’s okay that I am not part of my daily to-do list. I can just wish I had the time for a pedicure or to read a good book. My friend Ann always finds time to read books. I wonder how she does that. She must ignore her kids, and I bet her house is a mess.

When I first met Bizzy, her life was filled with chaos, worry, mommy guilt and excuses. She needed a change. She incorporated the strategies you will learn about in the next eight chapters into her daily routine, and her life has changed drastically. At the conclusion of the book, she will share with you how she lives her life now. You will be amazed by the change. The tools and strategies work if you incorporate them into your daily life. Daily action creates results. So let’s begin.

Before we dig into the 7 Strategies, it is important to briefly discuss the process we go through when making changes in our lives. The topic of change is discussed in Chapter 2. In Chapter 3 we will discuss making excuses. Admit it, ladies, we all make them. Excuses are the source of obstacles and barriers that prevent us from creating successful change. After learning about the change process and excuses, we will dive into the strategies. Enjoy your journey!

Living Life Beyond the Laundry = Balancing Life

“The essential question is not how busy are you?

But what are your busy at?” ~Oprah Winfrey