Читать книгу The Way of the Wall Street Warrior - Dave Liu - Страница 37

As we all know, life is rarely black and white; it is most often different shades of gray. Exaggeration is no different, so become an artiste. Think about how that menial summer job you had can be turned into a tour de force. Worked as a janitor? No! You were a Sanitation Engineer. Parked cars? Nope. Automotive Custodian. Got coffee? Hydration Manager. So master the power of exaggeration without lying. Half-truths are OK—politicians do it all the time—but outright lies will inevitably come back to bite you. And never, ever break the law. I don't have any tips for surviving jail.

Here are a few exaggeration-without-lying examples that may inspire you:

Half-Truth	In Reality
Demonstrated leadership in the face of adversity	Made sure the house didn't run out of alcohol at the Super Bowl block party
Exhibited superhuman endurance	Pulled three consecutive all-nighters crushing it on Fortnite
Displayed practical ingenuity	Created Facebook apps to siphon personal information for sale to advertisers
Showed impressive teamwork	Supervised my classmates in a group study to analyze the mating rituals of rats
Had intuition in the face of adversity	Prepared for this interview by reading this book multiple times

Exaggerating without lying is OK, but be forewarned. I know a firm that employs intuitives on their staff to smoke out the liars and cheats. These human beings are naturally gifted at reading people. So make sure whatever you say is the truth, and if it's a half-truth, make sure you can live with it. Otherwise, be prepared to get ejected out as an imposter.

COVID-19 changed the way we interact with people, but you can't let your guard down. (Just ask Jeffrey Toobin.²) Rick Heitzmann was recently conducting a Zoom interview for a senior-level job at his company. The dude was crowded in the corner of his bedroom (which, of course, is fine… . I don't want to judge!), when suddenly the door opened in the background and his wife walked in and started making his bed! Rick was appalled: “Didn't she realize her husband was interviewing for a job? I mean for God's sake, there should be some minimum level of professionalism.” Needless to say, the candidate, who was also disheveled and seemingly unshowered, did not receive an offer.

My own meetings during COVID-19 are online and it never ceases to amaze me how people nonchalantly deteriorate over time. At first, people are dressed as though they're going to church in their Sunday best, but soon the scene devolves into something from the movie The Hangover. Please have a little decorum and try to pretend you're still in the office. Remember, you're the same person who always laughed at old guys who forgot to zip up their pants after going to the bathroom. If you don't course-correct soon, one day you'll wake up and be that guy doing online meetings naked and not even know it.