Читать книгу Grumpy Old Men: New Year, Same Old Crap - David Quantick - Страница 49

They were so different once. One was austere and grey and talked nicely and wanted us to better ourselves, but not too much in case we liked it and took over. The other was funny and vulgar and liked America and made a lot of noise and wanted us to win money and prizes and go mental. It was rather nice, like having two different aunts, one of whom always gave you a really dull book for Christmas but always looked after you, while the other gave you £20 and a PlayStation but was too pissed to make Christmas dinner. Between the two of them, they pretty much had things sorted out.

But now the differences between them seem to have blurred. The BBC has decided to become zippy and modern and have bad soaps (see AFTERNOON SOAPS and, worse, reality shows (see REALITY TELEVISION), and generally try to look like an ageing librarian out on the town with his nephews. Meanwhile, ITV have started making crappy crime dramas and Jane Austen adaptations (see JANE AUSTEN). These days the only way to tell them apart is that ITV game shows use a lot of blue lighting and BBC ones favour liberal use of red. Bit like party conferences, really.