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Tuesday, September 11

It’s Only the First Week of Tenth Grade

And high school is already a damn mess.

In ninth grade you are in between.

No longer in junior high,

but still treated like a kid.

In ninth grade you are always frozen

between trying not to smile or cry,

until you learn that no one cares about

what your face does, only what your hands’ll do.

I thought tenth grade would be different

but I still feel like a lone shrimp

in a stream where too many are searching

for someone with a soft shell

to peel apart and crush.

Today, I already had to curse a guy out

for pulling on my bra strap,

then shoved a senior into a locker

for trying to whisper into my ear.

“Big body joint,” they say,

“we know what girls like you want.”

And I’m disgusted at myself

for the slight excitement

that shivers up my back

at the same time that I wish

my body could fold into the tiniest corner

for me to hide in.